【challenge yourself小组】第二次作业 issue50

superjiang001UID：2300426

ISSUE50（education类频率排名第二）- "In order to improve the quality of instruction at the college and university level, all faculty should be required to spend time working outside the academic world in professions relevant to the courses they teach."

In current society, it is the fact that there are variety kinds of problems existing in colleges and universities around different countries, such as the level of teachers towards their professional fields, the quality of graduates, even the morals of those graduates. However, in my opinion, it is not due to the less number of faculty are asking to spend time working outside the academic world towards their relevant professional courses they teach. I admit that the request that some faculty should do some relevant work outside their classes will do some help to the students to some extent, nevertheless, in more cases, it does the opposite.

Admittedly, no mater how celebrated or how much reputation a college has earned for itself, it definitely exists some weaknesses either in quality of instruction or in academic fields, such as high failure rates of examinations, large quantity of students for absence in class, small scientific contributions in academic field of a college each year, and so forth. However, those severely problems are not caused by less time those teachers or professors spend on working outside the academic world relevant to their courses. For example, the phenomenon that many students fail in the exam in the end of a term is primarily due to the less effort they have made during the semester. In fact, the temptations around us are so fascinating that students have a limited opportunity to focus his or her whole attention on the subjects they participate. Thus, in most cases the reason for failure in an exam is due to less time students have spend on the subject, rather than the less time a teacher or a professor have spent on outside world.

In fact, it does some improvement in the quality of instruction at the university level for requiring some teachers to take some time in working outside of school and do some research in the academic world relevant to their courses. The experience which students can hardly obtain through class can inspire the interests of students, and better solve the problems in instruction, say, absent for class. For example, reading books about the size, habits, and living environment about the Indian tiger in class maybe tedious and abstract, but seeing video about a terrifying monster chase its prey, which is shoot by a biological teacher in person, is a thrilling experience. In this type of situation, each student’s attention is focused on the issue, and they earn a higher chance to learn the knowledge in class.

However, we can not request all faculties to go out and do some research for some of them may play greater roles in school than outside world, especially when it comes to humanities. As a matter of fact, research about humanity needs some kind of effective mode of thinking, which can be learned mostly through history books. If we force them to work out of school too much, their ways of thinking will be formulated by some solid rules, which will do great harm to the students. In addition, it will be absurd if we ask some secretarial to do work outside for without them the daily work of school will be delayed and the entire operation of school will stop.

In sum, in order to improve the quality of instruction in college and university we would better ask the students themselves to try harder in their academic careers. Though we can inspire students’ interests through requiring some teachers to work outside and bring back realistic experience to the students,, we should not ask all faculties to do the same way for it will do great harm to the daily operation of universities.

wanghugigiUID：2465119

In current society, it is the fact that there are variety kinds of problems existing in colleges and universities around different countries, such as the level of teachers towards their professional fields, the quality of graduates, even the morals of those graduates. However, in my opinion, it is not due to the less number of faculty are asking to spend time working outside the academic world towards their relevant professional courses they teach. I admit that the request that some faculty should do some relevant work outside their classes will do some help to the students to some extent, nevertheless, in more cases, it does the opposite.

Admittedly, no mater how celebrated or how much reputation a college has earned for itself, it definitely exists some weaknesses either in quality of instruction or in academic fields, such as high failure rates of examinations, large quantity of students for absence in class, small scientific contributions in academic field of a college each year, and so forth. However, those severely problems are not caused by less time those teachers or professors spend on working outside the academic world relevant to their courses. For example, the phenomenon that many students fail in the exam in the end of a term is primarily due to the less effort they have made during the semester. In fact, the temptations around us are so fascinating that students have a limited opportunity to focus his or her whole attention on the subjects they participate. Thus, in most cases the reason for failure in an exam is due to less time students have spend on the subject, rather than the less time a teacher or a professor have spent on outside world.
每段的第一句话应该是这段的topic sentence，段内慎用however。
Admittedly让人觉得你这段是让步，可细看又不是，这个信号词用在这不是很恰当。
这段有些漏洞。学校的问题不是老师没有外出工作引起的，但题目的观点是如果老师外出工作了学校的教学水平会提高，这与你反驳的好像不是很对应。
In fact, it does some improvement in the quality of instruction at the university level for requiring some teachers to take some time in working outside of school and do some research in the academic world relevant to their courses. The experience which students can hardly obtain through class can inspire the interests of students, and better solve the problems in instruction, say, absent for class. For example, reading books about the size, habits, and living environment about the Indian tiger in class maybe tedious and abstract, but seeing video about a terrifying monster chase its prey, which is shoot by a biological teacher in person, is a thrilling experience. In this type of situation, each student’s attention is focused on the issue, and they earn a higher chance to learn the knowledge in class.
例子不能支持观点，video可以是“人与自然”拍的，为什么非得老师拍的呢。而且就算是老师拍的，也可以是老师旅游的时候拍的。总之这个例子不够合理，让人一看就很想反驳你。
However, we can not request all faculties to go out and do some research for some of them may play greater roles in school than outside world, especially when it comes to humanities. As a matter of fact, research about humanity needs some kind of effective mode of thinking, which can be learned mostly through history books. If we force them to work out of school too much, their ways of thinking will be formulated by some solid rules, which will do great harm to the students. In addition, it will be absurd if we ask some secretarial to do work outside for without them the daily work of school will be delayed and the entire operation of school will stop.
举例不恰当，没能很好地支持观点，据我所知，高校做行政的人（什么财务科学生科的老师）几乎都不上课的吧。

In sum, in order to improve the quality of instruction in college and university we would better ask the students themselves to try harder in their academic careers. Though we can inspire students’ interests through requiring some teachers to work outside and bring back realistic experience to the students,, we should not ask all faculties to do the same way for it will do great harm to the daily operation of universities.结论下得不好。

结构有些混乱，开头写得不错，然后反正反，让人有些忽上忽下的感觉，而且论证不够有力，举得例子也不是很合适。
另外，下次在帖子里把你的提纲也贴上吧…