【12月-1月IBT综合备考活动】之【TWE写作】12月14日作文 by Robaca

xlwxxyUID：2568970

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? In university, students should take the history courses no matter what field they study in.

[ 本帖最后由 xlwxxy 于 2008-12-19 18:44 编辑 ]

xlwxxyUID：2568970

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[ 本帖最后由 xlwxxy 于 2008-12-19 18:44 编辑 ]

xlwxxyUID：2568970

In my option, I don t think people should go to have the history class in the university. First, we already had a lot of history class at high school. Second, while history cause sometime is boring, for teacher would always read the contest in the book, and repeated it. Third, in university, we should learn how to learn but not just by rote.

First of all, in our middle and high school, teacher had already taught us tremendous of history issue, from renaissance to modern time; from foreign countries all over the world to our own country. We had already learned huge amount of history items. Remember at my middle school, our teacher reinforce us to write down all the evidences again and again just to rote the issues and crack for the term examination. It is a nightmare for me, because I sensed of huge of boring. You may oppose my point considering that it may be somewhat exercises for practice your writing, say, it is a chance for you to improve your writing word to be more beautiful. But for me, I am a scientist student who more likely to interest about mathematics; I did not think copy down a lot of words from the text book is funny. But I cannot figure out how we could learn from history class except just to rote what the teacher talking about the context in the text book which we would learn faster by ourselves.

In addition, as the technology improved, the history issues which we interest about could be learned through encyclopedia in internet or text books by ourselves. These issues and the contents are more than text books. And it is more interesting. For example, when we learn the election of the president in the text book, we can just read the words , but from internet, we can watch funnier videos and mp3 of the president s speech. We can catch the freshest thing in the world and Lenovo it to the ancient issues. It is fun to realize the progress of the world.

The last but not the least. When it comes to university, students should learn how to learn or how to improve our interpersonal and communication skills. Because most of time, we are gaining the knowledge from communication, which means that the intelligent and knowledge is from debate and argument.

In consequently, one can learn more towards self-study in history like through internet. And in university we should pay more attention on how to preparing us in future career, learning study and creative skill. What is more history should be boring in the class. We should learn history from the encyclopedia or internet when we need it, but not from the class in the university.

[ 本帖最后由 xlwxxy 于 2008-12-19 19:08 编辑 ]

mpromanusUID：2565872

In my option, I don't think people should go to have the history classes in the university (even if their major IS history? You have to qualify your statement properly to make proper sense.). First, we already had a lot of history classes at high school. Second, while history cause sometime is boring, for teachers would always read the contents in the book, and repeated it (整个句子不完整，另外老师教得不好完全是个人问题，总会有教得好的老师，问题是要不要开这门课，而不是老师教不教得来 - 你会因为你学校餐厅的菜很难吃就不吃饭吗？)Third, in university, we should learn how to learn but not just by rote (学历史一定就是死记硬背是你从哪儿得来的结论? 的确，在中国某些学科普遍不受重视而教学质量低下，教学方法落后，但是这并不代表这门学科本身不重要、没有学术价值或者不能让人学到学习方法。。说得严重些，你现在反对这个题目的理由几乎都是基于个人对历史这门学科的教学方法的鄙视，而不是真正的原因。。)

First of all, in our middle and high school, teachers had already taught us tremendous amount of history issue: from the Renaissance to modern time; from foreign countries all over the world to our own country. We had already learned a huge amount of history items (What is a 'history item'? Do you mean 'historical events'?). Remember at my middle school, our teacher reinforced (Wrong word. I think you mean 'force') us to write down all the evidences (of what?) again and again just to rote the issues and crack for the term examination. It is was a nightmare for me, because I sensed of huge of bore. You may oppose my point considering that it may be somewhat exercises for to practice your writing, say, it is a chance for you to improve your writing word to be more beautiful. But for me, I am was a science student who was more likely to be interested about mathematics; I did not think copying down a lot of words from the text book is funny (That's not the word to describe academic work. More likely 'exciting'.). But I cannot figure out how we could learn from history classes except just to rote what the teachers talking about: the contents in the text book which we would learn faster by ourselves. (Again, as I said, it's very obvious that you're basing your opinion upon your own experience and personal dislike of the subject. This is NOT okay for THIS question, which requires a more open, comprehensive and generic discussion. It all comes down to this: if you can declare that we shouldn't study history in universities because YOU think it's boring, someone else who hates mathematics can say that we shouldn't study mathematics in universities either - a question like this just CANNOT be entirely based on your personal preference.)

In addition, as the technologies improved, the history issues which we are interested about in could be learned through online encyclopedias in internet or textbooks by ourselves. These issues and the contents are more than textbooks (But you just said you learn them from textbooks? Are you referring to resources other than textbooks? If so, you must be specific.), and it is more interesting. For example, when we learn about the election of the president (Of what? There are so many presidents in the world..) in the textbooks, we can just only (经典近义词用法混淆..) read the words , but from the internet, we can watch funnier (I wouldn't use this word to describe presidential speeches..) videos and listen to mp3s of the presidents' speeches. We can catch the freshest things in the world and Lenovo (瀑布寒!!!你不会真的以为Lenovo是一个真正的单词而且它的中文意思就是‘联想’吧???!!!) it to the ancient issues. It is fun to realize the progress of the world. (Yes, but how's this related to the question? 问题不是问你历史怎么学才有趣啊。。)

The last but not the least, when it comes to university, students should learn how to learn or how to improve our (If you used 'students', it should be 'their' here.) interpersonal and communication skills. Because most of the time, we are gaining the knowledge from communication, which means that the intelligence and knowledge is come from debates and arguments. (Yes, but again, how's this related to the question? 问题也不是问你知识怎么获得啊。。)

In consequently, one can learn more towards by self-studying in history, like through the internet. And in university we should pay more attention on how to prepare us in for future careers, and learning study and creative skills. What is more, history should be boring (I understand that you may be trying to say we can't learn history by merely sitting in a classroom reading textbooks, but again, who tells you that history must be boring when taught in the classroom? It definitely doesn't need to be so.) in the classes. We should learn history from the encyclopedias or the internet when we need it, but not from the classes in the university.

总结：

句法和词汇还有相当的不地道之处，但最主要的问题是，一、二三论点完全跑题；二、客观题写成了主观题。一个需要以客观态度讨论的题目不能完全以你自己个人的好恶来讨论，否则就像文中评语提出的那样，你自己上历史课觉得老师教得烂很无聊所以大学不应该要求学生上历史课，那么别人也可以因为他的中学数学老师教得烂很无聊所以大学不应该要求学生上数学课呢，这样的话这个问题完全就没有 理性讨论 的意义了。这个道理就像是你要开间饭店，服务员问 我们应该做徽菜饭店还是做川菜饭店，你说 我不喜欢吃川菜，做徽菜！这是情绪上说得通的选择，但并不是能从道理上完全说服人的选择。。

不是说作文题目不能写个人经验和喜好，但是不是在这种明显需要稍稍打些官腔的题目上。。请学会审题目的潜台词。。

xlwxxyUID：2568970

多谢您的细心指点!
还一直以为lenovo就是联想.原来特指联想集团哦.
我的作文还要加把劲!
继续努力.

nickey0809UID：2349468

开首段最好不要出现first second……,否则后面分论点会给人一种重复的感觉，最好用简单的短语一句话打过
后面没认真看了
共同努力吧

xlwxxyUID：2568970

Hello Chicago. If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place where all things are possible. Who still wonders if the dream of our founders is alive at our time? Who still questions the power of our democracy? Tonight is your answer. It’s the answer told by lines that stretched around the schools and churches in numbers this nation has never seen. By people who have to wait for three hours or four hours, many for the very first time in their lives. Because they believe this time must be different. That their voice could be that difference. It’s the answer spoken by young and old, rich and poor, democrat and republic, black, white, Asian, Native American, gay, straight, disable or not disable. American who sent a message to the world that we’ve never been just the connection of, we are, and always will be, the United State of America. It’s the answer that led those who have been told for so long by so many to be cynical and fearful, and doubtful about what we can achieve to put their hands at the arm of history. And band once more toward the hope of a better day. It’s a long time come. But tonight, because of what we did on this day, in this election at this defining moment, change has come to American. I received an extraordinarily gracious call from Senator McCain. Sen. McCain fought long and hard in this campaign. And he’s fight hard or even harder for the country that he loves. He has endured sacrifices for America that most of us cannot be to imagine we are better off to the service by this brave and selfless leader. I congratulate him. I congratulate Cov.Palin for all they have achieved. And I look forward to work with them, to renew this nation’s promise in the months ahead I want to thank the Marver for his job. A man who is campaigned from his heart and spoke of the man and women who he grow up with not the streets of Scranton and rode with on the train home to Delaware, the vice president-elect of the United State, Joe Biden.

And I still be standing here without the unyielding support of my best friend for the last 16 years. The rock of our family, the love of my life the nation’s next first lady Michelle Osama. Sasha and Malian I love you both more than you can imagine and you can earn a new puppy in that’s coming with us to the White House. And while she is no longer with us. I know that my grandmother’s watching along with the family know who I am. I miss them tonight. I know that my debt to them is beyond measure. To my sister Maya, my sister Alma. All my brothers and sisters, thank you so much for all the support that you’ve given me. I am grateful to them. To my campaign manager David Plouffe. The unsung hero to this campaign, who built the best-the best political campaign I think, in the history in the United State of America. To the best campaign team ever assembled in the history of politics you made this happen. And I am forever grateful, for what you’ve sacrificed to get it done.

But above all. I will never gorge who this victory truly belongs to. It belongs to you, it belongs to you. I was never the likeliest candidate for this office. We didn’t start with much money or many endorsements. Our campaign was not hatched in the halls of Washington. It began at the backyard of the room, and the living rooms for Concord and the front porches of Charleston. It was billed by the man and women who dug into what little sackings they had to give $5 and $10 and $20 to the cause it brought strength from the young people who rejected the myth of their generation’s apathy who left their homes and their families for jobs that offered little pay and less sleep. It drew strength from the not-so-young people who braved the bitter cold and scorching heat to knock on doors of perfect strangers and from the millions of American dollars who volunteered and organized and proved that more than two centuries later a government of the people, by the people and for the people and this is your victory. And I know you didn’t do this just to win an election. And I know you didn’t do it for me. You did it because you understand the enormity of the task that lies ahead. For even as we celebrate tonight. We know that challenges that tomorrow will bring are the greatest of our lifetime-two wars. A planet in peril, the worst financial crisis in a century. Even as we stand here tonight, we know there are brave Americans waking up in the deserts of Iraq and the mountains of Afghanistan to risk their lives for us. There are mothers and fathers who will lie awake after the children fall asleep and wonder how they’ll make the mortgage or pay their doctor’s bills or save enough for child’s college education. There is new energy to harness and new jobs to be created new school to build and threats to meet alliances to repair. The road ahead will be long. Our climb will be steep. We may not get there in one year or even in one term. But the American- I have never been more hopeful that I am tonight that we will get there. I promise you-we as a people will get there. There will be setbacks and false starts. There are many who won’t agree with every decision or policy I make as President, and we know that government can’t solve every problem. But I will always be honest with you about the challenge we face. I will listen to you, especially when we disagree. And above all, I will ask you join in the work of remaking this nation. The only way it’s been done in America for 221 years-block by block, brick by brick, calloused hand by calloused hand. We began 21 months ago. In the depths of winter must not end on this autumn night. This victory alone is not the change we seek. It is only the chance for us to make that change. And that could not happen to the way things were. It cannot happen without you, without a new spirit of service a new spirit of sacrifice. So let us to summon a new spirit of patriotism, of responsibility, where each of us resolves to pitch in and work harder and look after not only ourselves, but each other. Let us remember that is this financial crisis taught us anything it’s that we cannot have a thriving Wall Street, while Main Street suffers. In this country, we rise of fall as one nation, as one people. Let us resist the temptation to fall back on the same partisanship and pettiness and immaturity that have poisoned our politics for so long. Let’s remember that is was a man from this state who first carried the banner of the Republican Party to the White House, a party founded on the values of self-reliance and individual liberty and national unity. Those are values that we all share. And while the Democratic Party has won a great victory tonight, we do so with a measure of humility and determination to heal the divides that have held back our progress. As Lincoln said to a nation far more divided that ours we are not enemies but friends. Though passion may have strained, it must not break our bonds of affection. And to those American whose support I have yet to earn. I may not have won your vote tonight, but I hear you voices, I need your help. And I will be your president, too. And to all those watching tonight from beyond our shores, from parliaments and palaces, to those who are huddled around radios in the forgotten corners of the world, our stories are singular but our destiny is shared, and a new dawn of American leadership is at hand. To those—to those who would tear the world down. We will defeat you. To those who seek Pease and security. We support you. And to all those who had if America’s bacon still burns as bright. Tonight we proved once more that the true strength of our nation comes not from the might of our arms or the scale of our wealth but from the enduring power of our ideals, democracy, liberty, opportunity and unyielding hope. That’s the true genius of America that America can change. Our union can be perfect. What we’ve already achieved gives us hope for what we can to achieve tomorrow. This election had many firsts and many stories that will be told for generations. But one my mind told me about a woman who cast her ballot in Atlanta. She’s a lot like the millions of others who stood in line to make their voice heard in this election. Except for one thing. Ann Nixon Cooper is 106 years old. She was born just a generation past slavery a time when there were no cars on the road or planes in the sky, while someone like her vote for two reasons because she was a woman, and because of the color of her skin. And tonight, I think about all that she’s seen throughout her century in America, the heartache and the hope, the struggle and the progress. The times we were told that we can’t and the people who pressed on with that American creed. Yes we can. At the time when women’s voices were silenced and their hopes dismissed she lived to see them stand up and speak out and reach for the ballot. Yes we can. When there was despair in the dust bowl, and depression across the land she saw a nation conquer fear itself with a New deal, new jobs, a new sense of common purpose. Yes we can. When the bombs fell on our harbor and tyranny threatened the world. She was there to witness a generation rise to greatness and democracy was saved. Yes we can. She was there for the busses in Montgomery the hoses in Birmingham a bridge in Selma and a preacher from Atlanta who told a people that “we shall overcome” yes we can. A men touch down on the moon, a wall came down in Berlin; a world was connected by our own science and imagination. And this year, in this election, she touched her finger to a screen, and cast her vote, because after 106 years in America through the best of times and the darkest of hours, she knows how American can change. Yes we can. American we have come so far, we have seen so much. But there is so much more to do. So tonight, let us ask ourselves, if our children should live to see the next century if my daughter should be so lucky to live as long as Ann Nixon Cooper, what change will they see? What progress will we have made? This is our chance to answer that call. This is our moment, this is our time to put the people back to work and open doors of opportunity for our kids, to restore prosperity and promote the cause of Pease, to reclaim the American dream and reaffirm the fundamental truth that our of many, we are one. That while we breathe, we hope. And where we are met with cynicism and doubts and those who tell us that we can’t. We will respond with that timeless creed that sums up the spirit of a people. Yes we can. Thank you. God bless you.

[ 本帖最后由 xlwxxy 于 2008-12-19 19:21 编辑 ]

泡面UID：2513568

同学，十四号的文你还没有帮我拍啊……

james011137UID：2280989

我以为7楼是写的作文呢。。
惊了。。

xlwxxyUID：2568970

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[ 本帖最后由 xlwxxy 于 2009-1-12 11:12 编辑 ]