ISSUE143/144【DIES IN FLAMES 0910G长线突破组】TASK I BY yuyu7yaya

yuyu7yayaUID: 2461700

我不行了，我不行了……我快被这个topic给纠结死了。
看我作文的人们啊，我对不起你们哇！

Artists produce valuable art works while critics produce evaluation for art works; artists produce beauty while critics produce criteria for beauty. Based on this, I would like to argue that artists should pay attention to critics’ opinions just like cooks should value customers’ words. At the same time, one point should be emphasized, that is, critics’ role is important but not so important to artists’ creation. Of course, the critics here are defined as those who evaluate works of art, no matter professional ones or amateurs.

To begin with, since art comes from and goes into ordinary life, it is safe to say that artists should value audience’s criticism. As a mirror to reflect complicated social problems, a channel to transmit given thoughts and one way to release surplus emotions, an artistic creation is supposed to introduce artists’ ideas to the audiences and confront their acerbic or modest comments. When we consider one novel or film is valuable, that means the majority of its audience support this work ; and when we say one painting is meaningless, that means few audience cherish it. Obviously, audiences’ criticism sometimes is used to measure the value of art works and therefore, it seems necessary for artists to refer to critics’ words when creating.

In addition,those reasonable and valuable evaluations from others could do much to artists’ work. Critics, with objective position, rich knowledge, super comprehension, acute judgment and excellent estheticism, of course, could find out the sticking point of an art work and therefore possess the ability to provide correct suggestions to its creator. These valuable words are helpful for artists to open their mind, draw their inspiration and lighten their course of creation.

Though, to some extent, critics’ words are effective, artists shouldbe cautious in their choice of that criticism. After all, most of criticism is limited because of critics’ limited.

Self-limits of critics such as poor comprehension, inaccurate expression or the lake of related information would lead to one-side conclusion. For artists, it is a wrong signal. In Northanger Abbey, Jane Austen pointed out that Gothic Story which is highly thought of by critics is far away from the reality in fact. Yet if Jane Austen changed her style into Gothic just because of the unneutral criticism, and we have to say goodbye to Pride and Prejudice, Sense and Sensibility, and Emma, that must be a great loss for the literary world.Fortunately, she didn’t. Necessarily, I need to state that hanging on to bad critics without thinking is unadvisable.

Another significant point: every critic has her/his own stand, which seems particularly so in the modern society. Some speak for political parties while others stand for economic groups, some prefer pithiness while others like complex. For the diverse positions, they may differ with each other widely on one artwork. And I wonder what benefits critics’ self-contradictory words would bring to artists?

Last but not the least, the creation of artists could be in advance of their age, but the principle of critics is always molded by the times.Consequentially, one art work highly estimated in one time may be disdained in another: When critics in 1700s laughed at Van Gogh’s masterpiece as trash, critics in 1990s looked them as miracle; when A Dream of Red Mansions was prohibited in Qing Dynasty in China, it becomes classic masterwork in 2000s. Aesthetical standard is changing from one generation to another. All praise and criticism is temporal, and no one could tell what is popular for next century. Therefore, artists have no need to sacrifice their creativity and artistic talent to cater for critics’ taste.

All in all, considering the negative and positive effects of criticism, it is appropriate for artists to pay attention to their creation seriously while refer to critics’ words limitedly. After all, artworks get their lives from artists, not critics.

米饭袜子UID: 2532172

Artists produce valuable art works while critics produce evaluation for art works; artists produce beauty while critics produce criteria for beauty. Based on this, I would like to argue that artists should pay attention to critics’ opinions just like cooks should value customers’ words. At the same time, one point should be emphasized, that is, critics’ role is important but not so important to artists’ creation. Of course, the critics here are defined as those who evaluate works of art, no matter professional ones or amateurs.
这一段好喜欢~简洁明了亮明观点，句子读着也很顺，而且个人举着很严谨啊，就是从at the same time 那前后~
To begin with, since art comes from and goes into ordinary life, it is safe to say that artists should value audience’s criticism. As a mirror to reflect complicated social problems, a channel to transmit given thoughts and one way to release surplus emotions, an artistic creation is supposed to introduce artists’ ideas to the audiences and confront their acerbic or modest comments. When we consider one novel or film is valuable, that means the majority of its audience support this work ; and when we say one painting is meaningless, that means few audience cherish it. Obviously, audiences’ criticism sometimes is used to measure the value of art works and therefore, it seems necessary for artists to refer to critics’ words when creating.这里之前一直在说A与audience嘞关系，包括这句话的前半句也还是，但最后突然冒出个C感觉有点突兀，然后就是不严谨，当然，我明白JJ嘞意思，但是不是开头把要表达的audience定义下或说明下更好？

In addition,those reasonable and valuable evaluations from others（JJ嘞意思是除了audience的吧？同样注明一下更清楚吧，初读不太理解） could do much to artists’ work. Critics（哦？所说的others是指c?咋么又回去了？）, with objective position, rich knowledge, super comprehension, acute judgment and excellent estheticism,（词汇基础好扎实~） of course, could find out the sticking point of an art work and therefore possess the ability to provide correct suggestions to its creator. These valuable words are helpful for artists to open their mind, draw their inspiration and lighten their course of creation.
（词汇基础好扎实~）这里有个例子会更有说服力~
Though, to some extent, critics’ words are effective, artists shouldbe cautious in their choice of that criticism. After all, most of criticism is limited because of critics’ limited.（过度我喜欢~）

Self-limits of critics such as poor comprehension, inaccurate expression or the lake of related information
（这个这个，咋这别扭，推翻自己前面的论述？是不是考虑从其他方面说limits?）would lead to one-side conclusion. For artists, it is a wrong signal. In Northanger Abbey, Jane Austen pointed out that Gothic Story which is highly thought of by critics is far away from the reality in fact. Yet if Jane Austen changed her style into Gothic just because of the unneutral criticism, and we have to say goodbye to Pride and Prejudice, Sense and Sensibility, and Emma, that must be a great loss for the literary world.Fortunately, she didn’t. Necessarily, I need to state that hanging on to bad （虽然限于弱小的我的词汇量不着应该换啥词，但建议换个词~）critics without thinking is unadvisable.（这里的例子很好，但有三点：1、没有提到criticism，只是说了C们很看好Gothic Story，后面你所说的JANE否定的criticism给人感觉是你臆想出来的。2、没有体现出c在该事例中的limits3、如果用你的最后一句做结MS前面的例子应该是某A因为盲目接受C而得苦果。。。这里逻辑上我举着有小问题）

Another significant point: every critic has her/his own stand, which seems particularly so in the
（society前不能加the 但有个形容词是不是就可以？这个我也不知道啊，向JJ求证下~）modern society. Some speak for political parties while others stand for economic groups, some prefer pithiness while others like complex. For the diverse positions, they may differ with each other widely on one artwork. And I wonder what benefits critics’ self-contradictory words （C们观点不同=自相矛盾？）would bring to artists?

Last but not the least, the creation of artists could be in advance of their age（误解啊误解）, but the principle of critics is always molded by the times.
Consequentially, one art work highly estimated in one time may（必然又可能？中文可能有这样说，但英文里。。。。。。。。） be disdained in another: When critics in 1700s laughed at Van Gogh’s masterpiece as trash, critics in 1990s looked them as miracle; when A Dream of Red Mansions was prohibited in Qing Dynasty, it becomes classic masterwork in 2000s. Aesthetical standard is changing from one generation to another. All praise and criticism is temporal, and no one could tell what is popular for next century. Therefore, artists have no need to sacrifice their creativity and artistic talent to cater for critics’ taste.

All in all, considering the negative and positive effects of criticism, it is appropriate for artists to pay attention to their creation seriously while refer to critics’ words limitedly. After all, artworks get their lives from artists, not critics.（咋么读着意思是让A ignore？）
SUMMARY:整篇文章从每段首句的连接词来看似乎很合逻辑，但内容确显得有些逻辑混乱：
1肯定C作用的方面------先给出一个audience的作用，下面接着说除了aud的c的作用及原因？c在这里应该作为一个总体概念，而从中可分出很多种c，但JJ这里明显乱了，给出了c的一个方面即aud后又去总体说c？这个实在有问题。。。。。。。
2否定c作用的方面---------看似三段是并列关系，但仔细思考会发现后两段所说的问题其实是属于C的局限性的。正因为C存在局限性才会出现大家各执一词和没有超前眼光的现象。
这是对JJ段间的逻辑问题的一点看法，段内的有标出我的疑问点，不赘述
另，JJ是不是可以不只说AC而加以拓展延伸？（参见老大的解读143|144）就事论事给人感觉象阿狗哇~
话说我对I实在实在是体会甚少，绝对的学习态度！！个人意见仅供参考

StefanaUID: 2143510

1# yuyu7yaya

附件里有带颜色的，我不知道怎么贴在这带颜色，去附件看。




格式：
绿色 拼写以及语法错误，要多注意的
红色 论述的不足，要再斟酌的
蓝色 词句的好用法，要学习的
黄色 论述的优点，要学习的
紫色 有争议，要再讨论的

Artists produce valuable art works while critics produce evaluation for art works; artists produce beauty while critics produce criteria for beauty. Based on this, I would like to argue that artists should pay attention to critics’ opinions just like cooks should value customers’ words.（这个比喻需要斟酌，评论家不代表大众口味，这样类比下也该是美食家。）
At the same time, one point should be emphasized, that is, critics’ role is important but not so important to artists’ creation.（这个句子太饶了，表意不清）
Of course, the critics here are defined as those who evaluate works of art, no matter professional ones or amateurs.（专业和业余，提得好 可惜后面再也没有说过）

To begin with, since art comes from and goes into ordinary life, it is safe to say that artists should value audience’s criticism. As a mirror to reflect complicated social problems, a channel to transmit given thoughts and one way to release surplus emotions, an artistic creation is supposed to introduce artists’ ideas to the audiences and confront their acerbic or modest comments. When we consider one novel or film is valuable, that means the majority of its audience support this work ; and when we say one painting is meaningless, that means few audience cherish it. Obviously, audiences’ criticism sometimes is used to measure the value of art works and therefore, it seems necessary for artists to refer to critics’ words when creating.（此段TS是A需要满足audience的批判性，但是最后却冒出来一个C，不大对劲，建议把最后一句话改下）


In addition, those reasonable and valuable evaluations from others could do much to artists’ work. Critics, with objective position, rich knowledge, super comprehension, acute judgment and excellent estheticism, of course, could find out the sticking point of an art work and therefore possess the ability to provide correct suggestions to its creator.（艺术无对错，这里有争议。） These valuable words are helpful for artists to open their mind, draw their inspiration and lighten their course of creation.

Though, to some extent, critics’ words are effective, artists should be cautious in their choice of that criticism.
（这里说得很好）After all, most of criticism is limited because of critics’
limited(limitation).

Self-limits(Self-limitation)
of critics such as poor comprehension, inaccurate expression or the lake of related information would lead to one-side conclusion. （这个句子是不是跟上面那段的一些观点自相矛盾？）For artists, it is a wrong signal. In Northanger Abbey, Jane Austen pointed out that Gothic Story which is highly thought of by critics is far away from the reality in fact. Yet if Jane Austen changed her style into Gothic just because of the unneutral criticism, and we have to say goodbye to Pride and Prejudice, Sense and Sensibility, and Emma, that must be a great loss for the literary world. Fortunately, she didn’t. Necessarily, I need to state that hanging on to bad critics without thinking is unadvisable.（是否来得过于突兀？）
*这里前面三段分段有问题，建议合三为一

Another significant point: every critic has her/his（建议换成the） own stand, which seems particularly so in the modern society. Some speak for political parties while others stand for economic groups, some prefer pithiness while others like complex.(你确实很会用排比，赞) For the diverse positions, they may differ with each other widely on one artwork. And I wonder what benefits critics’ self-contradictory words would bring to artists?(.)

Last but not the least, the creation of artists could be in advance of their age, but the principle of critics is always molded by the times. Consequentially, one art work highly estimated in one time may be disdained in another: When critics in 1700s laughed at Van Gogh’s masterpiece as trash, critics in 1990s looked them as miracle; when A Dream of Red Mansions was prohibited in Qing Dynasty in China, it becomes classic masterwork in 2000s.(排比，我喜欢)
Aesthetical standard is changing from one generation to another. All praise and criticism is temporal, and no one could tell what is popular for next century. Therefore, artists have no need to sacrifice their creativity and artistic talent to cater for critics’ taste.（既然不需要来满足C的口味，是否跟第二段it seems necessary for artists to refer to critics’ words when creating矛盾？）

All in all, considering the negative and positive effects of criticism, it is appropriate for artists to pay attention to their creation seriously while refer to critics’ words limitedly. After all, artworks get their lives from artists, not critics.（说实话，结尾我不喜欢，我觉得这个总结，来得有点莫名其妙，你之前又从来没有提到过艺术作品的生命力问题，何况这个题是说的艺术作品的永久价值）



总结：
1，筒子的语言棒棒，词汇和排比都赞~
2，分段有问题，应仔细考虑清楚这个问题，有关文章条理性。
3，观点不清晰，前面提到的后面没说，后面说的前面又没提，建议重新理清思路。