argument65 ＝so what=小组第四次作业 by xoxlol

XOXLOLUID: 2309408

。。。。。。。

XOXLOLUID: 2309408

65.The following appeared in a memo from the president of a chain of
cheese stores located throughout the United States.
"For many years all the stores in our chain have stocked a wide variety of both domestic and imported cheeses. Last year, however, the five best-selling cheeses at our newest store were all domestic cheddar cheeses from Wisconsin. Furthermore, a recent survey by Cheeses of the World magazine indicates an increasing preference for domestic cheeses among its subscribers. Since our company can reduce expenses by limiting inventory, the best way to improve profits in all of our stores is to discontinue stocking many of our varieties of imported cheese and concentrate primarily on domestic cheeses."
很多年来我们的所有连锁店都储备了很多种类的国产奶酪和进口奶酪。然而去年，我们的最新店里五种销量最高的奶酪都是威斯康星出产的cheddar奶酪。而且，最近一次由Cheese of the World杂志所举行的调查显示，其订阅者对于国产奶酪的倾向性越来越高。由于我们公司可以通过限制库存来减少开支，在我们所有连锁店增加盈利的最好方式就是停止贮备很多进口奶酪而主要集中于国产奶酪。

提纲：
1. five best-selling cheese 不等于 imported cheese is losing its market
2. survey
3. reducing inventory不等于improve profit

XOXLOLUID: 2309408

The author made a recommendation of cutting the storage of imported cheese and focusing on domestic cheese in hope of improving the company's profit. To support this point, last year's sale of the newest store and a survey conducted by a magazine among its subscribers have been provided. However, this argument seems plausible at first glance, but a close examination reveals its logical flaws and invalidity.
To begin with, the fact that last year's five best-selling cheese of the newest store were all domestic cheese from W does not necessarily imply that the imported cheese is losing its market. Firstly, last year's sale number could be an aberration, since the newly opened store might have used promotional strategy to attract customers by putting domestic cheese on big sale. Or the price of imported cheese increased noticeably due to last year's global economic climate, which has largely injured its selling performance. If this is the case, the growing popularity of domestic cheese is just a temporary phenomenon. Secondly, consuming habit of people from where the newest store located cannot reflect that of the national populace. Simply, local people loves domestic cheese does not mean so do people out of the region, due to factors like different taste preference and income level. Moreover, it is possible that the new store is in W and the cheese produced there can be available at a very low price or people only buy these cheese to support the local economy. Thirdly, no statistical comparison of the sales of domestic cheese and imported cheese has been given, which raises the suspicion that the five domestic cheese topped imported cheese with a very samll selling advantage. In other words, imported cheese actually holds a considerable market share. Therefore, before ruling out all alternatives above, the conclusion that domestic cheese has taken over the whole cheese market is unwarranted at best.
Another flaw of the argument lies in the survey. Little information about the magazine has been given. Thus, the less authoritative or influential the magazine is, the less reliable the survey is. Additonally, no information about the subscribers can be found either, which further weakens the reliability of the survey. It is entirely possible that the number of subscribers is too small to be representative, or subscribers are too centralized in a few specific areas to reflect a national situation. Therefore, unless the author offers more details of how, where and who the survey was conducted, the survey is no worthy reference.
Last, it is a fallacy to equate reduction of inventory with improvement of profit. Without analyzing the proportion of profit brought by domestic and imported cheese, brutally axing imported cheese supply will put the company at the risk of losing a significant profit source, let alone to increase it. Although there is a boost in the domestic cheese sale, if imported cheese is much more profitable, the profit from added sale of domestic cheese may fail to surpass, or even equates, that of imported cheese. In this case, despite the reduction of cost, the company is in no guarantee of profit raise.
In sum, to bolster the argument, further investigation of the cheese market is in need to provide more convincing statistics and proofs. Otherwise the author would have made a poor recommendation, which is ungrounded and misleading.

ZhouPYFUID: 2633778

The author made a recommendation of cutting the storage of imported cheese and focusing on domestic cheese in hope of improving the company's profit. To support this point, last year's sale of the newest store and a survey conducted by a magazine among its subscribers have been provided. However, this argument seems plausible at first glance, but a close examination reveals its logical flaws and invalidity.(however 和but 不能同时出现，出现其中一个就可以了，这个和中文的不一样)

To begin with, the fact that last year's five best-selling cheese（s） of the newest store were all domestic cheese from W does not necessarily imply that the imported cheese is losing its market. Firstly, last year's sale number could be an aberration, since the newly opened store might have used promotional strategy to attract customers by putting domestic cheese on big sale. Or the price of imported cheese increased noticeably due to last year's global economic climate, which has largely injured its selling performance. If this is the case, the growing popularity of domestic cheese is just a temporary phenomenon. Secondly, consuming habit of people from where the newest store located cannot reflect that of the national populace. Simply, local people loves domestic cheese does not mean so do people out of the region, due to factors like different taste preference （s）and income level(s). Moreover, it is possible that the new store is in W and the cheese produced there can be available at a very low price or people only buy these cheese to support the local economy. Thirdly, no statistical comparison of the sales of domestic cheese and imported cheese has been given, which raises the suspicion that the five domestic cheese(s) topped imported cheese with a very samll selling advantage. In other words, imported cheese actually holds a considerable market share. Therefore, before ruling out all alternatives above, the conclusion that domestic cheese has taken over the whole cheese market is unwarranted at best.
1去年的数据可能不准确2各地群众消费习惯不同3没有具体的比较数据，思路很清楚


Another flaw of the argument lies in the survey. Little information about the magazine has been given. Thus, the less authoritative or influential the magazine is, the less reliable the survey is. Additonally, no information about the subscribers can be found either, which further weakens the reliability of the survey. It is entirely possible that the number of subscribers is too small to be representative, or subscribers are too centralized in a few specific areas to reflect a national situation. Therefore, unless the author offers more details of how, where and who the survey was conducted, the survey is no worthy reference.
这里连词用的真好啊 thus additionally therefore，我很欠缺这个方面的应用


Last, it is a fallacy to equate reduction of inventory with improvement of profit. Without analyzing the proportion of profit brought by domestic and imported cheese, brutally axing imported cheese supply will put the company at the risk of losing a significant profit source, let alone to increase it. Although there is a boost in the domestic cheese sale, if imported cheese is much more profitable, the profit from added sale of domestic cheese may fail to surpass, or even equates(equate with?), that of imported cheese. In this case, despite the reduction of cost, the company is in no guarantee of profit raise.

In sum, to bolster the argument, further investigation of the cheese market is in need to provide more convincing statistics and proofs. Otherwise the author would have made a poor recommendation, which is ungrounded and misleading.

写的很不错啊
思路清晰，如果在第三段开始用个过渡，让步的语气也许会更好。
正文第一段稍微有点长
另外每段写完都要空一行

2006201652UID: 2496703

The author made a recommendation of cutting the storage of imported cheese and focusing on domestic cheese in hope of improving the company's profit. To support this point, last year's sale of the newest store and a survey conducted by a magazine among its subscribers have been provided. However, this argument seems plausible at first glance, but a close examination reveals its logical flaws and invalidity. To begin with, the fact that last year's five best-selling cheese of the newest store were all domestic cheese from W does not necessarily imply that the imported cheese is losing its market. Firstly, last year's sale number could be an aberration, since the newly opened store might have used promotional strategy to attract customers by putting domestic cheese on big sale. Or the price of imported cheese increased noticeably due to last year's global economic climate, which has largely injured its selling performance. If this is the case, the growing popularity of domestic cheese is just a temporary phenomenon. Secondly, consuming habit of people from where the newest store located cannot reflect that of the national populace. Simply, local people loves domestic cheese does not mean so do people out of the region, due to factors like different taste preference and income level. Moreover, it is possible that the new store is in W and the cheese produced there can be available at a very low price or people only buy these cheese to support the local economy. Thirdly, no statistical comparison of the sales of domestic cheese and imported cheese has been given, which raises the suspicion that the five domestic cheese topped imported cheese with a very samll selling advantage. In other words, imported cheese actually holds a considerable market share. Therefore, before ruling out all alternatives above, the conclusion that domestic cheese has taken over the whole cheese market is unwarranted at best.(好！论述的很充分！层次清晰) Another flaw of the argument lies in the survey. Little information about the magazine has been given. Thus, the less authoritative or influential the magazine is, the less reliable the survey is. Additonally, no information about the subscribers can be found either, which further weakens the reliability of the survey. It is entirely possible that the number of subscribers is too small to be representative, or subscribers are too centralized in a few specific areas to reflect a national situation. Therefore, unless the author offers more details of how, where and who the survey was conducted, the survey is no worthy reference. Last, it is a fallacy to equate reduction of inventory with improvement of profit. Without analyzing the proportion of profit brought by domestic and imported cheese, brutally axing imported cheese supply will put the company at the risk of losing a significant profit source, let alone to increase it. Although there is a boost in the domestic cheese sale, if imported cheese is much more profitable, the profit from added sale of domestic cheese may fail to surpass, or even equates, that of imported cheese. In this case, despite the reduction of cost, the company is in no guarantee of profit raise. In sum, to bolster the argument, further investigation of the cheese market is in need to provide more convincing statistics and proofs. Otherwise the author would have made a poor recommendation, which is ungrounded and misleading. 写得很好，语言很流畅，几乎每一句都值得学习，和zhou的很像，都是高手啊。。。 第一个攻击点很充分，篇幅有些长（和其他段落相比）