[TSUBASA] 第二次作业 argument 238 by wildrose800331

wildrose800331UID：2602131

WORDS: 486+4
TIME: 30+2
DATE: 2009-6-26 13:56:59

The author, in the argument, recommends that Mira Vista College must offer more courses in business and computer technology and hire additional job counselors to help students in order to help students with their resumes and interviewing skill, to achieve ultimate goal of helping their graduates find employment. To scaffold this recommendation, the arguer points out a fact that 90 percent of last year's graduating seniors in Green Mountain College had job offers from prospective employers while only half of graduating seniors at Mira Vista College who informed the placement office were employed in their major field of study. In addition, the author also lists that Green Mountain College has more business courses and more job counselors. However, a careful scrutiny of this deduction is problematic and groundless.
First, the analogy between graduating seniors in Green Mountain College and Mira Vista College is incomplete and thus inexact. In particular, the participants in this comparison were not in the same range. In Green Mountain College, 90 percent of last year's graduating seniors had job offers. But the gross members of corresponding subjects in Mira Vista College are seniors who informed the placement office they would be seeking employment. It is unknown the employment rate of other graduates who did not inform the office. Moreover, it is only traced for 70 percent of those informants in Mira Vista College had found full-time jobs within three months after graduation, but it does not reveal how long 90 percent of Green Mountain College graduates found full-time or part-time jobs.
Similarly, the information of graduates in Green Mountain College is also incomplete when it comes to their major field. It is unclear whether 90 percent of last year's graduates began their career in their major field of study or not. Neither is patent whether they majored in business courses or not. Thereby, it is equally possible that seniors with majors in business may find it hard to seek employment and their employment rate may be a great deal lower than 90 percent on average.
The final weakness is based on this fallacious analogy. Because of the uncertainty of the roles of business courses and more job counselors, it is not absolutely reasonable for Mira Vista College to offer more courses in business and hire additional job counselors. Besides this, this action along with computer technology can not definitely cause the improvement of their resumes and interviewing skills, while it deserves suspicion whether these improvements can enhance graduates' employment or not.
In sum, the conclusion reached in this argument is hasty and premature to be credible. To make it more consolidate, the author needs to clarify the counterparts and strengthen the overall comparison of analogy. To better evaluate this action, the arguer should verify the causal relationship between more business courses and computer technology and additional job counselors and graduates' resumes and interviewing skills, and further the cause-and-effect relations between these improvements and rising employment rate.