Issue51 【有一些问题】嘟嘟嘟 小khil请您帮忙 再4楼

khilUID: 2207785

Issue51:"Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed tomeet the individual needs and interests of each student."
//这是根据小鲨的建议该过后的作文，
In this era of rapid social and technological change, our society bogged down in the Sargasso sea of information overload.How to educate our next generation in order to adapt to those exploding information and benefit form them, different people have different opinion. The speaker claims that it is effective only to specific design to meet the individual needs and interests, and some other convinced that comprehensive education is the most important. In my view, both of them are essential and we need call for a balance between them.

On the one hand, the specific design education can inspire the student's interest to study and increase their ability to explore the world. Every student may be accomplished in various field, and the responsibility of educator is to help everyone can develop their own world. If we cast a look back at Copernicus, Consider, without giving up the midicine which he had already dabbled during his college education, while showing special interest in the mysterious astronomy, he would never challenged the established Ptolemy geocentric and then deduced his heliocentric conjecture. Again, the same is ture of the father of Microsoft, Bill Gates, when he dropped out of the world's No1 university Harvard, people would never thought of the result that he would become the richest people in the world, dominating the PC operating system market, with his famous Windows series. Given the above examples, interest is important to help the development of education.

However, over-specific design may causes many dangerous to the society as well as the student itself. As we know, scientific technology is a two-edged sword, which is can sweep off the ignorance and the blindness and bring up with a convenient comfortable welfare society; it also can break the peace and harmony of the society and turn to a terrible tool such as nuclear or bacteria weapon to destroy and ruin the human would. Therefore, without any restrict to the student's needs and interests, the student can research whatever he likes, such as a computer-maniac to program a extremely severe computer virus and or to slip into the Pentagam's offical website from it backdoor. Both of them will cost millions of dollor loss and even evoke unnecessary panic. We don't expect to shape a "expert" like Frankenstein, so take contraint into student-center education will bring more benifit.

On the other hand, specific design education alone can not shape a specialist from no where; there must be a basis and that basis, if not always,is comprehensive design. Because the student do not really know that they need which includes basic knowledge of natural science such as mathematics, physics, and chemistry and concept of socialization which can learn how to cooperate and what is teamwork, leadership and interpersonal skills. It is difficult to imagine that a student would like to be a computer engineer or an economist but have no idea of math which he/she do not want to learn ,or he/she want to be a great manager like Bill Gates but know little about cooperation. From the two examples above we can clearly see that it is definitely impossible to be gain the "dream future" of the student just to meet their interests without some basic knowledge.

All together, without specific design, education cannot truely effective; without comprehensive design, student cannot realise what is necessary indeed. We are searching for a balance, a balance which can guarantee to provide a proper amount of comprehensive design while offer a satisfied student-centered education.

[ 本帖最后由 khil 于 2007-2-13 17:06 编辑 ]

sharkangelUID: 2292537

总体来说，结构还是很明确得
但是用词不太准确，比如specific design to fit each student 明显得不合适
on the other hand...你最好前面搞个很明确得On the one hand得东西对比
On the contrary of student-centered education, the comprehensive design, which includes basic knowledge of natural science such as mathematics, physics, and chemistry and concept of socialization which can learn how to cooperate and what is teamwork, leadership and interpersonal skills, also has it necessity because the student do not really know that they need
好像太长了吧，，，主题句我觉得简洁最好，然后围绕展开
例子太单一，变点样子，不要老说理，至少来个for example，再XX学校怎么做得，然后取得甚么成绩，就算是编也很象了拉，你得例子感觉是不太好得说理类型了
另外，句式倾向长短结合，不要老长老长得一段，句型也需要变化，比如来点插入语，你给我看得if not always不错啊
用词还稍微不是很准确，进了来点GRE词汇，以你得掌握应该不是问题
就这些了，呵呵

khilUID: 2207785

参加同主题

khilUID: 2207785

有一些句子拿不准，不知道这么说对不对：辛苦了

when the father of Micsosoft, Bill Gates, dropped out of the [Law course] in world's No1 university Harvard and devote all his time to his computer 想说法律专业

our society bogged down in the [Sargasso sea of] information overloaded
想说陷入sargasso sea 一般的过剩信息

Therefore, the student cannot research whatever he likes without any restriction, such as computer-maniac programming computer virus or [infiltrating the Pentagam's website from it backdoor.]
从pantagam的网站后门潜入

Providing that, Copernicus and Gates is not fond of astronomy and computer science respectively, how can they acquire their greatness. 这样说可以吗？

khilUID: 2207785

up 有些问题在楼上 不要沉入大海 打入冷宫啊

khilUID: 2207785

up