argument0 呜呜呜呜,总算完成了！

superficialUID: 2151788

argument0
The University of Claria is generally considered one of the best universities in the world because of its instructors' reputation, which is based primarily on the extensive research and publishing record of certain faculty members.  In addition, several faculty members are internationally renowned as leaders in their fields.  For example, many of the faculty from the English department are regularly invited to teach at universities in other countries.  Furthermore, two recent graduates of the physics department have gone on to become candidates for the Nobel Prize in Physics.  And 75 percent of the students are able to find employment after graduating.  Therefore, because of the reputation of its faculty, the University of Claria should be the obvious choice for anyone seeking a quality education.

syllabus:
1 文中让学生选择claria主要原因是这所学校的老师有好的名声，而学生选择学校时候所考虑的因素不光包括这个方面，既包括学校的奖学金，学费等和申请者的经济情况关系较大的方面，也包括学校所处的地理位置，自然环境，住宿条件等等很多其他方面。而且文中据此说claria是世界上最好的学校之一其真实性也很值得怀疑。
2 文中第二个原因是学校老师中有several在国际上是其领域内的领导者，这条由英语系的老师经常受邀请去别的国家来支持。一个英语国家的英语系老师本身代表英语领域内的最高水平是理所当然的，所以并不能充分的说明学校的优秀，或许这个学校只是英语系水平高，可是其他的专业水平却低于全国的平均水平。
3 对于百分之七十五的学生都能找到工作这条，我们不仅要质疑，这个数据是什么时候的出的，如果是经济不景气的时候，这的确是一个令人激动的数字，但是如果是在就业情况普遍不错的情况下，多达1/4的毕业生找不到工作，学生能毫无顾虑的选择这所学校并支付不菲的学费吗？再者，找到的是什么样的工作呢？如果是那种不需要高等教育也可以轻松担任的职业，就不能说明claria是个好学校了。

In this argument, the speaker illustrated several reasons to support his conclusion that any one seeking a quality education should obviously choose Claria. (1) Students should choose Claria as a reason of good faculty reputation, (2) the arguer lend scant evidence to convince us Claria has international academic leaders, (3) 75 percent of graduates are able to find employment are contraversial if the speaker cannot exclude some possibility that is bad to them. In the following I will argue these in order of their importances.

First, based on the main reason of its instructor's reputation, the speaker suggested the students to choose Claria while seeking further education. Nevertheless, students should take all factors into consideration as deciding which university to go. That consideration includs not only the fellowship provided and tuition needed which are greatly associated with the applicator's economy circumstance, but location of the university, environment, accommodation and so forth. Accordingly, the speaker insist that Claria is one of the best uniwersities which actually rooted in reputation is questionsble.

Secondly, a less important reason to support the speaker's claim is several teachers are internationally renowned as leaders in their fields. Evidents following is teachers from its English department are regualarly invited to teach at universities in other countries. Unfortunately, this evident cannot lend strong support to that. It is natural that an English department in an English-spoken country represents the most high level of the English realm, correspondingly, this is a scant evidence to prove that Claria is good enough. Perhaps the best major in Claria is just English, as other majors are lower-than-everage.

Last but not least, the proportion of graduate that can find job means nothing to us. We can query the number in several respects. To begin with, when did Claria get such a data. This would be an exciting number during depression, yet if the employment was under a good condition, 1/4 would be contraversial enough as student deciding whether pay a large number of money to Claria is a rational investment. Moreover, we cannot any further information about the types of job, jobs that can be adaquate for ones without high education cannot definitely prove that Clairia is suitable for the applicator.

In sum, the arguer lends us scant evidence in proving whether Claria is good enough for us to choose. To strengthen this he must rull out many facts that are suspected by the applicators and convince us Claira is a clear choice for them, or they may suffer a bad enrollment as a consequence of these less convinced evidences.

[ Last edited by superficial on 2005-12-10 at 23:30 ]

lvfenmeiUID: 2165911

aggument0 呜呜呜呜,总算完成了！

argument0
The University of Claria is generally considered one of the best universities in the world because of its instructors' reputation, which is based primarily on the extensive research and publishing record of certain faculty members.  In addition, several faculty members are internationally renowned as leaders in their fields.  For example, many of the faculty from the English department are regularly invited to teach at universities in other countries.  Furthermore, two recent graduates of the physics department have gone on to become candidates for the Nobel Prize in Physics.  And 75 percent of the students are able to find employment after graduating.  Therefore, because of the reputation of its faculty, the University of Claria should be the obvious choice for anyone seeking a quality education.

syllabus:
1 文中让学生选择claria主要原因是这所学校的老师有好的名声，而学生选择学校时候所考虑的因素不光包括这个方面，既包括学校的奖学金，学费等和申请者的经济情况关系较大的方面，也包括学校所处的地理位置，自然环境，住宿条件等等很多其他方面。而且文中据此说claria是世界上最好的学校之一其真实性也很值得怀疑。
2 文中第二个原因是学校老师中有several在国际上是其领域内的领导者，这条由英语系的老师经常受邀请去别的国家来支持。一个英语国家的英语系老师本身代表英语领域内的最高水平是理所当然的，所以并不能充分的说明学校的优秀，或许这个学校只是英语系水平高，可是其他的专业水平却低于全国的平均水平。
3 对于百分之七十五的学生都能找到工作这条，我们不仅要质疑，这个数据是什么时候的出的，如果是经济不景气的时候，这的确是一个令人激动的数字，但是如果是在就业情况普遍不错的情况下，多达1/4的毕业生找不到工作，学生能毫无顾虑的选择这所学校并支付不菲的学费吗？再者，找到的是什么样的工作呢？如果是那种不需要高等教育也可以轻松担任的职业，就不能说明claria是个好学校了。

In this argument, the speaker illustrated several reasons to support his conclusion that any one seeking a quality education should obviously choose Claria.(个人认为这里应该有个承接的句子) (1) Students should choose Claria as a reason of good faculty reputation, (2) the arguer lend scant evidence to convince us Claria has international academic leaders,（是不是有点不妥？？） (3) 75 percent of graduates are able to find employment are controversial（错字改过了） if the speaker cannot exclude some possibility that is bad to them. In the following I will argue these in order of（？？） their importances(whose importance? Too vague to understand). 开头段落作的不太好，给人一种错觉，好像一边在攻击，一边在叙述作者的论据和假设???

First(firstly), based on the main(what about the word “chief”?) reason of its instructor's reputation, the speaker suggested (that)the students to(delet “to”) choose Claria while seeking further education. Nevertheless, students should take all(overall?) factors into consideration as deciding which university to go. That consideration includs not only the fellowship provided and tuition needed which are greatly associated with the applicator's economy circumstance, but location of the university, environment, accommodation and so forth(or and the like ). Accordingly, the speaker insist that Claria is one of the best uniwersities(?) which actually rooted in reputation is questionsble(?)(虽然列举了一些factors,但是应该进一步的攻击)

Secondly, a less important reason to support the speaker's claim is several teachers are internationally renowned as leaders in their fields. Evidents following is teachers from its English department are regualarly invited to teach at universities in other countries. Unfortunately, this evident cannot lend strong support to that. It is natural that an English department in an English-spoken country represents the most high level of the English realm, correspondingly, this is a scant evidence to prove that Claria is good enough. Perhaps the best major in Claria is just English, as other majors are lower-than-everage.

Last but not least, the proportion of graduate that can find job means nothing to us. We can query the number in several respects. To begin with, when did Claria get such a data. This would be an exciting number during depression, yet if the employment was under a good condition, 1/4 would be contraversial enough as student deciding whether pay a large number of money to Claria is a rational investment. Moreover, we cannot any further information about the types of job, jobs that can be adaquate for ones without high education cannot definitely prove that Clairia is suitable for the applicator.

In sum, the arguer lends(provides(?/) us scant（用的有点多，比如insufficient,etc.） evidence in proving whether Claria is good enough for us to choose. To strengthen this（？） he must(should) rull （rule）out many(what about “alternative possible factors) facts that are suspected by the applicators and convince us Claira is a clear choice for them, or they may suffer a bad enrollment as a consequence of these less convinced evidences.
(总的看了一下：（1）句子的语法有很多的错误，努力改正。
                （2）论述的不够升入，假如有上面的提纲那样的话就行了。
                 (3) 开头和结尾，TP的基本模式不够熟悉。
      以上只是我的观点，有不妥之处请指教，希望大家多多关照！！！！！！

superficialUID: 2151788

非常感谢lvfenmei的提醒，我在表达上确实需要改正很多基本的错误！ 而且开头和结尾应该套用自己总结的比较精彩的模版，恩，今天下午和明天就总结自己的不足好了。

[ Last edited by superficial on 2005-12-10 at 14:52 ]