issue152 jingjing(kito)临考互拍！^_^

jingjingtousUID: 2164820

TOPIC: ISSUE152 - "The only responsibility of corporate executives, provided they stay within the law, is to make as much money as possible for their companies."
WORDS: 562          TIME: 0:45:00          DATE: 2006-2-9
(This composition was revised for one time)
提纲：
1 executive对公司尽职就应该实现利润得最大化
2 profits不是唯一责任，应该给员工提供一个良好得工作氛围
3 应该关注一些可能由于公司得生产造成得社会问题

Here is a fast developing society towards economic globalization and culture homogeneity, every executive in the field of business should undertake the responsibility to guarantee his/her company's survival in the intensive competition. Thus, I strongly agree with the speaker on the foundation that the executives should pay their great efforts to make their companies' profits maximization, nevertheless, they should account for their responsibilities for the employees and the society.

To begin with, I turn my agreement with the speaker on the fundament that corporate leaders, provided staying within the law, has the responsibility to earn as much money as they could for their companies. For one thing, it is the sufficient profits that warrant one company could survive in the intensive competition in the global market. With the rapid proess of high-tech and informative communication, more and more companies expend their branches to every corner of the world, for instance, if the Coca Cola-one of the most famous Carbon acid drinking manufacturer plans to propagandize its new products to the global market, it should spend a big amount of money on the announcement campaign. Moreover, if the company makes a schedule for developing an innovation for scrambling the world market, it also demands the sufficient finance for new product' research. Therefore, without the adequate profits, in other words, without the contribution of executives to make their profits maximization, all the costly but brand new strategies cannot be carries out effectively and efficiently. For another thing, a capability and perspective of an entrepreneur's executive should be substantiated by his achievement, one of the most important standards for evaluate the leader is good or not is whether the executive could help the company earn the sufficient profits as possible as he could. Therefore, as the speaker claims, every executive has the obligation to make the company's profits maximized in order to ensure his/her company survive and thrive in the global competition.

Nevertheless, is the profit maximization the sole responsibility for the leaders of corporations? Of course not. Apparently, the executive of one firm has the responsibility to ensure their employees keep the optimal passions and enterprise. On the one hand, the leader of a company is responsible to create a harmonious atmosphere among his/her subordinates; he should integrate all the members of the company and motivate each of them to do the best for the company. Obviously, the effective method to inspire the employees and synthesis each power of them together for improving the company to some extent of reflecting the ability of leadership and the value of the executive. No one would acknowledge that a leader who cannot conduct all his/her employees cohesively is a successful one. Consider Jack Welch, the previous executive of GE, which is the biggest and most complex company in the world, during his tenure, he successfully encourage his subordinate to pay their most efforts for the corporation and finally made the market value of it reach the amazing number-400 billion dollars. On the other hand, the executive has the duty to keep a superior and high moral example for his subordinate. Not only can this quality help him authorize in the company but also would further erect a credibility for the company in the business world.

In addition, the successful leader in the company should pay more attention on the societal problems which may caused by the producing progress of the company. Common sense informs us that many companies such as the plastic manufacturers released their wastes into the environment and consequently polluted the regional waters and air upon which the living conditions of residents rely. Therefore, an effective executive should take his/her duty of forestalling these deleterious effects on the society and match the environment-protecting organizations to solve these problems.

To sum up, I concede the statement with my reservation. A superior executive should not only bring his company the maximized profits but also inspire all its members pay their grand efforts on the progress of the corporation and furthermore, undertake the charities and help the environment-protecting organizations to solve the pressing problems for the society.

@amy@UID: 209096

占一下，我来帮你拍~~ ^_^

@amy@UID: 209096

Here is a fast developing society towards economic globalization and culture homogeneity, every executive in the field of business should undertake the responsibility to guarantee his/her company's survival in the intensive competition. Thus, I strongly agree with the speaker on the foundation that the executives should pay their great efforts to make their companies' profits maximization, nevertheless, they should [加个also好像更通一点] account for their responsibilities for the employees and the society.

To begin with, I turn my agreement with [这个说法还是第一次见到] the speaker on the fundament that corporate leaders, provided staying within the law, has the responsibility to earn as much money as they could for their companies. For one thing, it is the sufficient profits that warrant one company could survive in the intensive competition in the global market. With the rapid proess [process?] of high-tech and informative communication, more and more companies expend their branches to every corner of the world, for instance, if the Coca Cola-one of the most famous Carbon acid drinking manufacturer plans to propagandize its new products to the global market, it should spend a big amount of money on the announcement [是不是advertising好一点] campaign. Moreover, if the company makes a schedule for developing an innovation for scrambling [连着两个for从句，改一个成为to do的形式吧] the world market, it also demands the sufficient finance for new product' research. Therefore, without the adequate profits, in other words, without the contribution of executives to make their profits maximization, all the costly but brand new strategies cannot be carries [carried] out effectively and efficiently. For another thing, a capability and perspective of an entrepreneur's executive should be substantiated by his achievement, one of the most important standards for evaluate the leader is good or not [这个is good or not是不是多余啊，我没看懂，呵呵] is whether the executive could help the company earn the sufficient profits as possible as he could. Therefore, as the speaker claims, every executive has the obligation to make the company's profits maximized in order to ensure his/her company survive and thrive in the global competition.

Nevertheless, is the profit maximization the sole responsibility for the leaders of corporations? Of course not. Apparently, the executive of one firm has the responsibility to ensure their employees keep the optimal passions and enterprise. On the one hand, the leader of a company is responsible to create a harmonious atmosphere among his/her subordinates; he should integrate all the members of the company and motivate each of them to do the best for the company. Obviously, the effective method to inspire the employees and synthesis each power of them together for improving the company to some extent of [去掉of] reflecting[reflect] the ability of leadership and the value of the executive. No one would acknowledge that a leader who cannot conduct all his/her employees cohesively is a successful one. Consider Jack Welch, the previous executive of GE, which is the biggest and most complex company in the world, during his tenure, he successfully encourage [encouraged] his subordinate to pay their most efforts for the corporation and finally made the market value of it reach the amazing number-400 billion dollars. On the other hand, the executive has the duty to keep a superior and high moral example for his subordinate. Not only can this quality help him authorize in the company but also would further erect a credibility for the company in the business world.

In addition, the successful leader in the company should pay more attention on the societal problems [社会问题是不是直接说social problems就可以了] which may [加上be] caused by the producing progress [process?] of the company. Common sense informs us that many companies such as the plastic manufacturers released their wastes into the environment and consequently polluted the regional waters and air upon which the living conditions of residents rely. [排放废气好像是法律所不允许的]Therefore, an effective executive should take his/her duty of forestalling these deleterious effects on the society and match the environment-protecting organizations to solve these problems.

To sum up, I concede the statement with my reservation. [这句不错，呵呵]A superior executive should not only bring his company the maximized profits but also inspire all its members pay their grand efforts on the progress of the corporation and furthermore, undertake the charities [这点你在前文都没提] and help the environment-protecting organizations to solve the pressing problems for the society.[这点是不是太具体了，还有其他社会问题啊]

kito9695UID: 209685

占~~晚上来看看~~

virginia730UID: 208873

^ ^来了.......
看了一遍~~~
jingjing的结构和观点是没什么问题的. 特别是第二段, 很清晰的结构
但是不少地方语言的搭配和词性有问题
which may caused <===比如这个地方,应该用被动才对
语言有些地方粗心了

另外, 斟酌了下,觉得第2段, 前面突然就转到了==>广告要钱, 如果在交代下,比如很多地方要钱. 就更好了,这样很突然恩
第3段写少了点,时间不够了吗?
......不过.....> <你怎么写得到500多字那~~~~~~~羡慕

jignjing 是什么时候考?

virginia730UID: 208873

对了..
忘了讲, 有的短语我不是很确定~~不过在用的时候尽量准确恩, 感觉看着很生那

leedgenUID: 160823

进来拜读一下jingjing的大作来

jingjingtousUID: 2164820

原帖由 virginia730 于 2006-2-9 21:50 发表
^ ^来了.......
看了一遍~~~
jingjing的结构和观点是没什么问题的. 特别是第二段, 很清晰的结构
但是不少地方语言的搭配和词性有问题
which may caused <===比如这个地方,应该用被动才对
语言有些地方粗心 ...

我现在头痛的就是这个问题，在语言的组织方面有很多问题
谢谢大家的拍转，今天因为制作了两个小电影，所以。。。
唉，明天来认真修改，呵呵！^_^