argument73 kito同主题写作第四期

kito9695UID: 209685

0606G同主题写作第四期——argument73

[题目]

[提纲]
1、第六年租新车数量超过买新车数量不能说明大多数的车主是租车的。后五年是租车发展较快的五年。从第六年开始，由于汽车的平均寿命是六年，后五年中第一批买车的人需要在第六年换车。作者认为如果这一年租车数量仍超过买车数量就说明很多这些原本是潜在的买车顾客群的人也转向租车了，那么租车人数就会成为大多数；
2、即使第六年大多数的车主的车是租来的，也没有证据显示租车多于买车的趋势会持续；有可能租车比较便宜，车主的多是在存钱买车，一旦money充足就会买车；也有可能租车还尚属比较新的方式，过些日子买车还会流行起来；
3、没有证据显示买车和租车的利润，即使租车的人多，也可能因为薄利而不如少量卖车赚得多，所以不一定要将卖车业务转向租车；此外，作者有一个错误的前提，就是一个人只买一辆车，很可能一个人买好几辆，使得实际买车的数量多于租车的数量；而且租车的组成人多，也说明买车的潜在顾客群体增大，也可能使将来买车的人增加；
4、卖车的市场是始终存在的。比如，有些有钱人就愿意拥有自己的私车，还不止拥有一辆；而且租车业务始终需要买新车，新车用一年就会变旧，如果每年都有租新车的人，那么就需要每年相应的买新车，所以卖车的市场一定不会消失，甚至随着租新车的需求增大而增大。此外Mohilia国外也许也存在买车消费群


[正文] (614 words)
In the argument, the arguer advises that the car dealership to turn its business from selling cars to leasing them, due to a steadily surpassing population of leasing new cars, comparing with that of buying new cars in the last five year. However a careful scrutiny reveals its several illogical points as follow.

First and foremost, the major problem of the argument is the evidence that the number of people leasing new cars has surpassed the number buying new cars each of the last five years does not necessarily indicate that the majority of drivers will be driving leased if there is a continuous surpassing population of leasing new cars in the sixth year. Admittedly, the average age of cars driven in Mohilia is six years and the first people buying new cars during the last five years would need to change their cars. Thus, a continuous surpassing population of leasing new cars in the six year may possibly show a conversion of the first people from the potential car buyers into car leasers. However, it is just a possibility, and maybe there will be a falling of the leasing people in the sixth year, and the number of leasers may become even less than the number of buyers. In that case, the conclusion will be totally reversed.

Secondly, provided it is true that people who lease cars rather than buy cars count for a majority of total drivers, there is no evidence indicating the increasing trend of population with leased cars will last. Maybe because of the lower price, drivers will first lease a car and save money during their lease. Once they have enough money, they will buy new cars. It is also possibly because that the form of leasing cars still appears to be a new and fashion form so that many people would like to try at the beginning. And sever years later, the situation may change with buying cars popular again. Any of these scenarios, if true, would serve to undermine the rationality of the argument.

In addition, the arguer ignores a key issue that is the profit. Even if the number of people who lease cars is larger than people buying cars, if buying a car is far more profitable than leasing a car, there is the possibility that the total profit by selling cars will exceed that by leasing cars. Besides, the arguer is unfairly assumes that one can only buy or lease one car. In fact, one may buy more than one cars while he or she only possibly lease one car. Thus, we could not rule out the possibility that the real number of buying cars may surpass the real number of leasing cars. Moreover, the cars to lease should also be bought from car sellers. The more car leaser become, the more cars used for leasing should be bought, which will greatly stimulate the cars’ selling market.

Last but not least, market for selling cars will always exist, which make the assertion of changing business from selling cars to leasing them a little hasty. Rich man may always like to buy new cars and even more than one car. And people who choose to lease cars also like to lease new ones, which perhaps bring a large market to car sellers. Still the arguer fails to consider the foreign consumers to buy new cars.

All in all, the argument without enough evidence and logical reasoning seems rather unwarranted base on the analysis above. To make it logically accepted, the arguer should not only do ample investigation to know the real situation of Mohilia’s car market, but also provide details information about the both profits.

没有限时，太难了，限时肯定写不完:(
谢谢拍~留下链接，必回拍

leedgenUID: 160823

In the argument, the arguer advises that the car dealership to(should) turn its business from selling cars to leasing them, due to a steadily surpassing population of leasing new cars, comparing with that of buying new cars in the last five year(s). However a careful scrutiny reveals its several illogical points as follow.小别这个开篇不知道是不是restate，我看了追星剑的那篇关于阿狗开篇的，现在觉得好像这么些对得分不利哟，你看看这个
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=134092

First and foremost, the major problem of the argument is the evidence that the number of people leasing new cars has surpassed the number buying new cars each of the last five years does not necessarily indicate that the majority of drivers will be driving leased （cars）if there is a continuous surpassing population of leasing new cars in the sixth year. 超常的句子啊，我噎到这里才喘过气来Admittedly, the average age of cars driven in Mohilia is six years and the first people buying new cars during the last five years would need to change their cars. Thus, a continuous surpassing population of leasing new cars （those who lease new cars）in the six year may possibly show a conversion of the first people from the potential car buyers into car leasers. However, it is just a possibility, and maybe there will be a falling of the leasing people in the sixth year, and the number of leasers may become even less than the number of buyers. In that case, the conclusion will be totally reversed.

Secondly, provided it is true that people who lease cars rather than buy cars count for a majority of total drivers, there is no evidence indicating the increasing trend of population with leased cars will last. Maybe because of the lower price, drivers will first lease a car and save money during their lease. Once they have enough money, they will buy new cars. It is also possibly because that the form of leasing cars still appears to be a new and fashion form so that many people would like to try at the beginning. And sever years later, the situation may change with buying cars popular again. Any of these scenarios, if true, would serve to undermine the rationality of the argument.小别的句子衔接真好，佩服 [这个点我也写了，多添了点什么社会经济不景气什么的]

In addition, the arguer ignores a key issue that is the profit. Even if the number of people who lease cars is larger than people buying cars, if buying a car is far more profitable than leasing a car, there is the possibility that the total profit by selling cars will exceed that by leasing cars.真佩服小别啊，长句是标准的长啊 Besides, the arguer is（is去掉） unfairly assumes that one can only buy or lease one car. In fact, one may buy more than one cars while he or she only possibly lease one car. Thus, we could not rule out the possibility that the real number of buying cars may surpass the real number of leasing cars. Moreover, the cars to lease should also be bought from car sellers. The more car leaser become, the more cars used for leasing should be bought, which will greatly stimulate the cars’ selling market.最后这句租车人也需要购车真绝

Last but not least, market for selling cars will always exist, which make the assertion of changing business from selling cars to leasing them a little hasty. Rich man may always like to buy new cars and even more than one car. And people who choose to lease cars also like to lease new ones, which perhaps bring a large market to car sellers. Still the arguer fails to consider the foreign consumers to buy new cars.[这段好像有点逊色，销售市场一直存在，但是租赁市场也有啊，这个不能说明转到租赁汽车这个建议不好]

All in all, the argument without enough evidence and logical reasoning seems rather unwarranted base on the analysis above. To make it logically accepted, the arguer should not only do ample investigation to know the real situation of Mohilia’s car market, but also provide details information about the both profits.


阿狗都写这么长啊，佩服

有少量语法错误，但是条理清晰，句子衔接也好:victory:

kito9695UID: 209685

原帖由 leedgen 于 2006-2-10 20:46 发表
First and foremost, the major problem of the argument is the evidence that the number of people leasing new cars has surpassed the number buying new cars each of the last five years does not necessarily indicate that the majority of drivers will be driving leased （cars）if there is a continuous surpassing population of leasing new cars in the sixth year. 超常的句子啊，我噎到这里才喘过气来

哎呀，这是我常常被批的地方，总是写费解且奇怪的句子

kito9695UID: 209685

原帖由 leedgen 于 2006-2-10 20:46 发表
In the argument, the arguer advises that the car dealership to(should) turn its business from selling cars to leasing them, due to a steadily surpassing population of leasing new cars, comparing with that of buying new cars in the last five year(s). However a careful scrutiny reveals its several illogical points as follow.小别这个开篇不知道是不是restate，我看了追星剑的那篇关于阿狗开篇的，现在觉得好像这么些对得分不利哟，你看看这个
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=134092

谢谢leedgen，好细心:handshake我是想概括的陈述一下题目，可能有搞成了restate，去研究下

kito9695UID: 209685

我刚给jingjing改完issue，马上去改你的同主题，表急啊~~

至于写的长是因为这篇argument太难了，总觉得说不清楚~~平常的也就四百多字，最多上五百

小室黄瓜UID: 2155213

0606G同主题写作第四期——argument73

[题目]

[提纲]
1、第六年租新车数量超过买新车数量不能说明大多数的车主是租车的。后五年是租车发展较快的五年。（我觉得这个论点的不出，并且没有论证这句话，这五年的租车多于买车很可能是由于其他原因）从第六年开始，由于汽车的平均寿命是六年，后五年中第一批买车的人需要在第六年换车。（第一批买车的人能有几个？也许非常少。这个论点也得之过急！）作者认为如果这一年租车数量仍超过买车数量就说明很多这些原本是潜在的买车顾客群的人也转向租车了，那么租车人数就会成为大多数；
2、即使第六年大多数的车主的车是租来的，也没有证据显示租车多于买车的趋势会持续；有可能租车比较便宜，车主的多是在存钱买车，一旦money充足就会买车；也有可能租车还尚属比较新的方式，过些日子买车还会流行起来（这条跟我的想法一样嘿嘿）；3、没有证据显示买车和租车的利润，即使租车的人多，也可能因为薄利而不如少量卖车赚得多，所以不一定要将卖车业务转向租车；此外，作者有一个错误的前提，（我觉得前提的谬误应该在第1，2条的时候说，这时候才提这个不符合逻辑，最好把这一点放在前面。我觉得利润是结论才提到的问题。）就是一个人只买一辆车，很可能一个人买好几辆，使得实际买车的数量多于租车的数量（一个人买一辆，有很可能买好几辆？应该是很可能租好几辆吧？）；而且租车的组成人多，也说明买车的潜在顾客群体增大，也可能使将来买车的人增加；
4、卖车的市场是始终存在的。比如，有些有钱人就愿意拥有自己的私车，还不止拥有一辆；而且租车业务始终需要买新车，新车用一年就会变旧，如果每年都有租新车的人，那么就需要每年相应的买新车，所以卖车的市场一定不会消失，甚至随着租新车的需求增大而增大。此外Mohilia国外也许也存在买车消费群（注意“卖车市场是一定始终存在的”，文中manager并没有说要取消，而是说把重心放在哪里，使租车还是继续以卖车为主。还有“每年有租新车的人，那么就需要买车”是谁来买车？是我们公司来买车！这样是浪费我们的钱的！所以得出的是：还应该卖车才对！）
[正文] (614 words)
In the argument, the arguer advises that（advise sb to do 的话that应该去掉） the car dealership to turn its business from selling cars to leasing them, due to a steadily surpassing population of leasing new cars, comparing with that of buying new cars in the last five year. However a careful scrutiny reveals its several illogical points as follow.

First and foremost, the major problem of the argument is the evidence that the number of people leasing new cars has surpassed the number buying new cars each of the last five years does not necessarily indicate that the majority of drivers will be driving leased if there is a continuous surpassing population of leasing new cars in the sixth year. Admittedly, the average age of cars driven in Mohilia is six years and the first people buying new cars during the last five years would need to change their cars. Thus, a continuous surpassing population of leasing new cars in the six year may possibly show a conversion of the first people from the potential car buyers into car leasers.（ However, it is just a possibility, and maybe there will be a falling of the leasing people in the sixth year, and the number of leasers may become even less than the number of buyers.你只是提出了另一种可能，而没有说原文的前提错在哪里。而且这一段感觉转述题目的成分更多） In that case, the conclusion will be totally reversed.

Secondly, provided it is true that people who lease cars rather than buy cars count for a majority of total drivers,（这句衔接得不错） there is no evidence indicating the increasing trend of population with leased cars will last. Maybe because of the lower price, drivers will first lease a car and save money during their lease. Once they have enough money, they will buy new cars. It is also possibly because that the form of leasing cars still appears to be a new and fashion form so that many people would like to try at the beginning. And sever years later, the situation may change with buying cars popular again. Any of these scenarios, if true, would serve to undermine the rationality of the argument.（这一段提出轮点，并得到了充足的论证！）
In addition, the arguer ignores a key issue that is the profit. （Even if the number of people who lease cars is larger than people buying cars, if buying a car is far more profitable than leasing a car, there is the possibility that the total profit by selling cars will exceed that by leasing cars 这句里两个if 好像放的不对，把第2个if换成but 意思就可以了）. Besides, the arguer( is unfairly assumes 应该把is去掉)that one can only buy or lease one car. In fact, one may buy more than one cars while he or she only possibly lease one car. Thus, we could not rule out the possibility that the real number of buying cars may surpass the real number of leasing cars. Moreover, the cars to lease should also be bought from car sellers. The more car leaser become, the more cars used for leasing should be bought, which will greatly stimulate the cars’ selling market.

Last but not least, market for selling cars will always exist, which make the assertion of changing business from selling cars to leasing them a little hasty. Rich man may always like to buy new cars and even more than one car. And people who choose to lease cars also like to lease new ones, which perhaps bring a large market to car sellers. Still the arguer fails to consider the foreign consumers to buy new cars.

All in all, the argument without enough evidence and logical reasoning seems rather unwarranted base on the analysis above. To make it logically accepted, the arguer should not only do ample investigation to know the real situation of Mohilia’s car market, but also provide details information about the both profits.结尾写的不错

没有限时，太难了，限时肯定写不完
谢谢拍~留下链接，必回拍  小别的

我给小别的提纲批得狠了点。不过都是用心去想的，有不对的地方，马上反驳我吧！！
另外，佩服能写这么多字！！菜菜的黄瓜水平有限，来解解恨，狠批一下我的吧！！

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... &extra=page%3D1

kito9695UID: 209685

刚看到~~谢谢黄瓜~~~

lawrence1984UID: 178326

请问楼主是不是交大的？