argument38 互拍！@@一定会回拍的，呵呵，咕咕。。。

咕咕呵呵UID: 2152952

Argument38
（网络顺序）
１鱼的消费量高和人们不因为感冒看医生次数少没有直接关系。
２即使是上面一点有必然关系，也不能说明“不因为感冒看医生”证明“人们感冒的次数少”。所以不能得出“吃大量鱼能预防感冒”的结论。
３即使“吃大量鱼能预防感冒”的结论成立，但鱼油能否代替鱼值得怀疑。
４缺勤和感冒没有必然关系。

In this argument the arguer recommends that the daily use of Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil can have an effect on preventing colds and lowing absenteeism. To support this recommend the arguer assume that eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent cold-the reason most frequently given for absences from school and work, and that fish oil called Ichthaid will substitute fish wholly. While it seemingly logical at first glance, after a further examination, several critical fallacies will be exposed as below.

Firstly, The author provides no evidence that the high consumption of fish is the reason for the fact---people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. Though this reason is likely a factor of the fact, other possibilities, such as just because of East Meria (EM) is far away from downtown, therefore people living there reluctant to go to the hospital except necessary or they thought colds isn’t serious problem and unwillingness to,   shouldn’t been overlook. In addition, the survey's results about high consumption of fish and few times of colds’ treatment are doubtful because of lacking any specific information about the representative of them, even haven’t show any statistics or examples. It is impossible to assess the reliability of this conclusion above. Unless the arguer does more investigation about the real reason of those two phenomenons, merely can we have the confidence about those assumptions.

In the second place, granted that cause-effect relationship is acceptable, there is no guarantee that people in EM hardly catch cold and that’s all due to their custom of diet—high consumption of fish. Healthy diet does can strengthen people’s immunity and prevent them being catch cold or other diseases in some measure. But are those the mainly reason? Evidences arguer mentioned are too insufficiency to provide credible support for the assertion. It is entirely possible that nature environment is nice enough for people living or a great majority of them have good habit with doing excise frequently. So arguer ‘s deduction is unpersuasive without been given more solid evidence of fact to support it such as more information about EM or EM’s people.

Thirdly, the arguer also falsely assumes that the real reason of absences is cold in his schools and workplaces. Many kinds of reason can lead to absences, such as diseases (including colds and other diseases), personal matters, negative attitude and so forth. In fact, cold is only one of them that may not play a vital role among them, even sometimes is just a pretext, while the really reason we cannot know.

Last but not least, even if cold act a key role about absence, there is no guarantee that fish oil called Ichthaid would substitute fresh fish totally and have same effectiveness as the latter one. Fish oil is refined from fish, but not fish. Does the maker know what is useful and what is wasteful? Dose the procedure have no reduction in fish's original nutrition? The arguer didn't tell us.

Due to the arguer’s illogical deductions and assumptions, we cannot accept the conclusion unless we were showed more evidence about the survey is reliable and more fact about cold and absence's necessary relation. In addition, the same and the difference between fresh fish and fish oil must been showed clearly.

谢谢提意见，请留下你的作文地址，以便给你看。

[ 本帖最后由 咕咕呵呵 于 2006-2-17 20:10 编辑 ]

咕咕呵呵UID: 2152952

up.

咕咕呵呵UID: 2152952

up

lawrence1984UID: 178326

请注意发帖格式

咕咕呵呵UID: 2152952

谁来拍一下

everydayUID: 2187653

Argument38
（网络顺序）
１鱼的消费量高和人们不因为感冒看医生次数少没有直接关系。
２即使是上面一点有必然关系，也不能说明“不因为感冒看医生”证明“人们感冒的次数少”。所以不能得出“吃大量鱼能预防感冒”的结论。
３即使“吃大量鱼能预防感冒”的结论成立，但鱼油能否代替鱼值得怀疑。
４缺勤和感冒没有必然关系。

In this argument the arguer recommends that the daily use of Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil can have an effect on preventing colds and lowing absenteeism. To support this recommend the arguer assume that eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent cold-the reason most frequently given for absences from school and work, and that fish oil called Ichthaid will substitute fish wholly to function for the prevention to colds 是不是加上这样的解释比较好？）. While it seemingly logical at first glance, after a further examination, several critical fallacies will be exposed as below.

Firstly, the author provides no evidence that the high consumption of fish is the reason for the fact---people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. Though this reason is likely a factor of the fact, other possibilities, such as just because of East Meria (EM) is far away from downtown, therefore people living there reluctant to go to the hospital except necessary(这是什么用法哈？感觉读着不顺啊) or they thought colds isn’t serious problem and unwillingness（are unwilling） to,  shouldn’t been overlook(overlooked?). In addition, the survey's results about high consumption of fish and few times of colds’ treatment are doubtful because of lacking any specific information about the representative of them, even haven’t show any statistics or examples. It is impossible to assess the reliability of this conclusion above. Unless the arguer does more investigation about the real reason of those two phenomenons(phenomena?), merely can we have the confidence about those assumptions.(呵呵，这句倒装好，我就不会用倒装，一用就错，汗颜ing)

In the second place, granted that cause-effect relationship is acceptable, there is no guarantee that people in EM hardly catch cold and that’s all due to their custom of diet—high consumption of fish. Healthy diet does can (?!) strengthen people’s immunity and prevent them being catch cold or other diseases in some measure. But are those the mainly(嗯？副词可以放在这个位置吗？) reason? Evidences arguer mentioned are too insufficiency（insufficient） to provide credible support for the assertion. It is entirely possible that nature environment is nice enough for people living or a great majority of them have good habit with doing excise frequently. (好想法)So arguer ‘s deduction is unpersuasive without been given more solid evidence of fact to support it such as more information about EM or EM’s people.

Thirdly, the arguer also falsely assumes that the real reason of absences is cold in his（这里he是谁？题目没说是他的学校和工作单位吧？很可能它只是一个鱼油产品的推销商。。。呵呵，怎么感觉像在写阿狗。。。换成the怎么样哈？） schools and workplaces. Many kinds of reason can lead to absences, such as diseases (including colds and other diseases), personal matters, negative attitude and so forth. In fact, cold is only one of them that may not play a vital role among them, even sometimes it is just a pretext, while the really reason we cannot know.

Last but not least, even if cold act a key role about absence, there is no guarantee that fish oil also called Ichthaid would substitute fresh fish totally and have(has) same effectiveness as the latter one. Fish oil is refined from fish, but not fish. Does the maker know what is useful and what is wasteful? Dose the procedure have no reduction in fish's original nutrition(这句什么意思啊？Has the procedure reduced the original nutrition in fish?)? The arguer didn't tell us. （感觉这段应该向前放，因为在文中的逻辑顺序在‘推断防止感冒有利于降低缺勤率’之前）

Due to the arguer’s illogical deductions and assumptions, we cannot accept the conclusion unless we were showed more evidence about the survey is reliable and more fact about cold and absence's necessary relation. In addition, the same and the difference between fresh fish and fish oil must been showed clearly.

呵呵。。。句子变化多，复杂句也多。。。比我强多乐。。。向你学习哈。。。
句子长乐就容易犯诸位不一致的毛病。。。注意哈~~~

everydayUID: 2187653

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... e%3D2#pid1768129605

我的阿狗38....呵呵。。。谢谢你哈。。。。你改得我看乐~~~

咕咕呵呵UID: 2152952

记事本： 给everyday 改argu38

paopaofynUID: 2124302

Argument38
（网络顺序）
１鱼的消费量高和人们不因为感冒看医生次数少没有直接关系。
２即使是上面一点有必然关系，也不能说明“不因为感冒看医生”证明“人们感冒的次数少”。所以不能得出“吃大量鱼能预防感冒”的结论。
３即使“吃大量鱼能预防感冒”的结论成立，但鱼油能否代替鱼值得怀疑。
４缺勤和感冒没有必然关系。
建议1和2 换下位置，嘻嘻，你看过我的文章啦

In this argument the arguer recommends that the daily use of Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil can have an effect on preventing colds and lowinglowering absenteeism. To support this recommendrecommendation, the arguer assumes that eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent cold-the reason most frequently given for absences from school and work, and that fish oil called Ichthaid will substitute fish wholly. While it seemingly logical at first glance, after a further examination, several critical fallacies will be exposed as below.
典型新东方开头，看来也是上过那里的了:)，不过你是加入了自己的想法的了，不错

Firstly, Thethe author provides no evidence that the high consumption of fish is the reason for the fact---people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. Though this reason is likely a factor of the fact,不通顺 other possibilities, such as just because of East Meria (EM) is far away from downtown, therefore people living there reluctant to go to the hospital except necessary or they thought colds isn’t a serious problem and thus unwillingness to,   shouldn’t been overlook. 句子太长拉，可以写成Though this reason is likely a factor of the fact, other possibilities shouldn’t been overlook. Maybe East Meria (EM) is far away from downtown, therefore people living there reluctant to go to the hospital except necessary. Also perhaps hey thought catching colds isn’t a serious problem, thus they are unwilling to go to see doctors. In addition, the survey's results about high consumption of fish and few times of colds’ treatment are doubtful because of lacking any specific information about the representative of them, even haven’t show any statistics or examples. Hence,It is impossible to assess the reliability of this conclusion above. Unless the arguer does more investigation about the real reason of those two phenomenons, merely can we have the confidence about those assumptions.

In the second place, granted that cause-effect relationship is acceptable, there is no guarantee that people in EM hardly catch cold and that’s all due to their custom of diet—high consumption of fish. Healthy diet does can strengthen people’s immunity and prevent them being catch cold or other diseases in some measure. But are those the mainly reason? Evidences此词复数形式是evidence！ arguer mentioned are too insufficiency to provide credible support for the assertion. It is entirely possible that nature environment is nice enough for people living or a great majority of them have good habit with doing excise frequently. So arguer ‘s deduction is unpersuasive without been given more solid evidence of fact to support it ,such as more information about EM or EM’s people.

Thirdly, the arguer also falsely assumes that the real reason of absences isbecause of catching colds cold去掉 in his schools and workplaces. Many kinds of reasons can lead to absences, such as diseases (including colds and other diseases), personal matters, negative attitude and so forth.这里说的好，我要向你学习，哈哈 In fact, cold同上 is only one of them that may not play a vital role among them, even sometimes is just a pretext, while the really reason we cannot know.应该说catching colds是大家做常用的excuse吧

Last but not least, even if cold同上 acts a key role about? absence, there is no guarantee that fish oil called Ichthaid would substitute fresh fish totally and have same effectiveness as the latter one. Fish oil is refined from fish, but not fish. Does the maker know what is useful and what is wasteful? Dose the procedure have no reduction in fish's original nutrition? The arguer didn't是不是用fails to 更好 tell us.

Due to the arguer’s illogical deductions and assumptions, we cannot accept the conclusion unless we were showed more evidence about the survey is reliable应该去掉吧？ and more fact about cold and absence's necessary relation. In addition, the samesame是形容词resemblance怎么样？ and the differences between fresh fish and fish oil must been showed clearly.

逻辑清晰，就是要注意一些小错，加油！:)

咕咕呵呵UID: 2152952

thank you