Argument 145 我的第一篇习作,欢迎拍砖

hitwyqUID: 2130688

Argument145
A new study collected data that shows that people who snore are more likely to gain weight than are people who do not snore. It is well known that many people who snore also stop breathing frequently during the night for a few seconds, a condition called sleep apnea. The interruption of breathing wakes the person—often so briefly that the waking goes unnoticed—and can leave the person too tired during the day to exercise. Anyone who snores, therefore, should try to eat less than the average person and to exercise more

提纲:
1数据模糊,不能成为有力证据,many 那个词,不一定是大部分打呼噜的人会 sleep apnea
2.少吃多锻炼不是解决打呼噜的办法,要找深成原因
3.不一定要少吃,即没有理由建议人们少吃
In this argument, the arguer concludes that anyone who snores should try to eat less and exercise more than the average person according to a study that shows people who snore are apt to gain weight and an analysis about the correlation between exercise and snore. This argument is not persuasive in several critical aspects

First, the arguer just tells us that many people who snore suffer from sleep apnea and we do not know the percentage (这个地方请大家看看这句子准确的是什么样的,拿不准)who are awake at night in the total persons who snore. So It is  possible that some - or perhaps even most- snorers do not stop breathing frequently during the night, or are not too tired to exercise, or do not tend to gain weight. Thus the arguers' advice that "anyone who snores" should try to eat less and exercise more is unwarranted.

Second, the arguer advises the persons who snore to excise more to avoid becoming fat. According to the arguer's analysis the snorers are too tired during the day to exercise because of the sleep apnea. Then how can they exercise in the tired state and what should the person do to eliminate their tiredness. So the arguer should find the essential cause of sleep apnea and modify his advice based on the reasons

Third, the arguer provides no causes why any snorers should eat less than the average persons in the whole argument. Maybe the arguer tries to give some advices to fat snores to become slim. But the study merely shows that people who snore are more likely to gain weight than people who do not snore. No evidences show that all snorers are fat. So It is not necessary to ask all snorers to eat less. There is also another worth problem to be considered carefully. Eating less may not help fat snorers to lose weight.


第一篇文章,大家见笑了!!