issue26 我的第三篇习作望指教

jiji8850_renUID: 2241791

Most people would agree that buildings represent a valuable record of any society's past, but controversy arises when old buildings stand on ground that modern planners feel could be better used for modern purposes. In such situations, modern development should be given precedence over the preservation of historic buildings so that contemporary needs can be served.

  The speaker asserts that modern development should take precedence over the preservation of historic buildings to serve the contemporary needs faced with the situations when the modern planners think the places where arises old buildings will be better used for modern purposes, even though the modern planners hold the idea that the old buildings without doubt represent a valuable record of any society. I cannot stand beside the speaker for that old buildings are precious treasures our ancestors leave us combined with their supreme intellect and painstaking courage to struggle against the wild nature, once destroyed the wealth will not be back again. Thus, I conclude that the preservation of our cultural wealth should be our first priority, no matter what kind of situation it is.
  In recent several decades, the technology of various fields developed rapidly and need many resources to keep the development rolling on, in need for new land using as the enlarged work plant, new material for the efficient fuel to provide energy, and so forth. Admittedly, it is necessary for human beings to sacrifice devotedly and then advance their own well-being, but there should be limitation to this sacrifice. Government hope to build a new skyscraper to establish their pride prestige in the international world at the cost of breaking down the grave old building of centuries of history, is the modern skyscraper deserve that? I'm sure everyone will do their best to avoid that detrimental incident happen.
   There stand numerous cultural buildings all over the world, and there as well lies amounts of relics at every corner of the earth, all of which stand for civilization of human beings handed down from one generation to another, they remind us that we are a people of great history and ingenuity of our ancestors, they incur our pride  when faced with other groups of people, they enhance our self-esteem thus help us to overcome the problems one after another. Whenever you stand on the Brooklyn bridge, the first wire-holding suspension bridge in the human history, not only enjoy the splendid landscape with Washington bridge and the blue sky set off one another, but also shocked that how clever our precedent is to create so amazing miracle. Suppose you are standing in a skyscraper instead of Brooklyn Bridge, can you feel the same way as you ambling on the bridge? Of course no.
   The originality of the cultural assets is another support to approve that historic buildings should not give way to modernization, since uniqueness and freshness the historic wealth came into being which people admire for centuries. The great value of the historic buildings not only lies in their originality that just one Eiffel Tower exist all over the world, but also they can help us to stem our identification origin, since various historic assets of different eras come through each other thus a whole line of the history of civilization came into being. If the old buildings give way to the blueprint of modernization what can we resort to when we investigate our own culture?
  In a word, the old buildings convey a strong sense of history and prevent human beings from wildering in the diversity of civilization, thus enhance our self-esteem and pride towards our ancestors, they are of great value and should not give way to some silly suggestion from so-called modern planners. Moreover, we should take steps to preserve historic assets and leave them to our offspring, integrate and intact.

sjasminUID: 2213207

词汇用的挺精彩
主题句应该再明确一些
另:二段第一句太长了!估计ETS的人也晕!

[ 本帖最后由 sjasmin 于 2006-8-17 19:04 编辑 ]