高强组周一作业argumet232 多多指教

sunnie_518UID: 2136235

TOPIC: ARGUMENT232 - The following appeared in a memo from the sales manager of Eco-Power, a company that manufactures tools and home appliances.

"Many popular radio and television commercials use memorable tunes and song lyrics to call attention to the products being advertised. Indeed, a recent study of high school students showed that 85 percent could easily recognize the tunes used to advertise leading soft drinks and fast-food restaurants. Despite our company's extensive advertising in magazines during the past year, sales of our home appliances declined. Therefore, to boost company profits, we should now switch to advertisements featuring a distinctive song."
WORDS: 569          TIME: 0:59:00          DATE: 2006-11-20

提纲：
1、survey 的科学性受到质疑：调查方式不明，不知道是否是随机，其次，只有百分比，总人数不知道
2、对soft－drink使用的不见的对home appliance也适用：产品性质，顾客群不同。
3、公司sales下跌的原因没有说明，不见的就是因为广告，可能是质量，款式等问题
4，sales上升不等于profit也会上升，还有成本的问题。

In this argument,the arguer concludes that in order to improve the profit of their company, they should switch to advertisements featuring a distinctive songs . To justify this conclusions, the arguer cites a study of high school students to assert that memorable song and lyrics can call attention to the product and thus can boost company profits. I find the arguer's argument logically unconvincing in several aspects.

First of all, the arguer make a unwarranted assumption that the commercial song is useful based on a problematic survey. the procedure of how this survey is carried out does not mentioned in this argument, therefore, we find no sign of such procedures for random sampling, and have good reason to doubt if the sample is representitive enough to reflect the general attitudes of all high school students as a whole. Meanwhile, the number 85% can not give strong support to the assumption without providing the total number of the student surveyed.

Secondly, the arguer commits a fallacy of false analogy in arbitrarily asserting that the advertising strategy used to promote soft drinks and fast-food restaurants can also be used to promote Eco-Power. In fact, on the one hand, the target customer of soft drinks and fast-food restaurants are different from this company which product manufactures tools and home appliances ,the latter may mainly aimed at housewives or old people but students. On the other hand , the fact that home
appliances are more expensive than soft-drink and fast food and are not repeated buying products as fast food and soft-drinks means that the product features of home appliances are totally different from fast food. Therefore, these two kinds of product cannot use the same strategy.

Thirdly, the arguer does not to figure out the true factors which contribute the decline of company sales but make a hasty conclusion that it is due to the advertisement. However, he can not rule out the possibilities that the quality or the style are the true factor of declining profit.

Finally, granted the advertisement can improve the sales it does not guarantee that the use of such advertisement can absolutely improve the company profit. As we know, the profit does not only related with sales but the cost. If the cost of making advertisement is too high to within the budgets, the company also can not gain profit.

In sum, the arguer has not convinced us that the advertisement strategy should be adopted. To strengthen the argument, the arguer should analyze the real factors which contribute the decline of company sales and provide more convincing survey to support it.

[ 本帖最后由 sunnie_518 于 2006-11-24 17:44 编辑 ]

expire7UID: 2160574

作文习作的标题格式不对哦，请修改。参照一下你们队规吧。

sunnie_518UID: 2136235

好的，谢谢提醒

cyfmltUID: 2180593

In this argument, the arguer concludes that in order to improve the profit of their company, they should switch to advertisements featuring a distinctive songs. To justify this conclusions, the arguer cites a study of high school students to assert that memorable song and lyrics can call attention to the product and thus can boost company profits. I find the arguer's argument logically unconvincing in several aspects.开头不错，分析了论证思路，学习一下
First of all, the arguer make a unwarranted assumption that the commercial song is useful based on a problematic survey. the procedure of how （of how 不能连用吧）this survey is carried out does(was) not mentioned in this argument, therefore, we find no sign of such procedures for random sampling, and have good reason to doubt if the sample is representative enough to reflect the general attitudes of all high school students as a whole. Meanwhile, the number 85% can not give strong support to the assumption without providing the total number of the student surveyed.
Secondly, the arguer commits a fallacy of false analogy in arbitrarily asserting that the advertising strategy used to promote soft drinks and fast-food restaurants can also be used to promote Eco-Power. In fact, on the one hand, the target customer of soft drinks and fast-food restaurants are different from this company which product manufactures tools and home appliances, the latter may mainly aimed at housewives or old people but (not) students. On the other hand, the fact that home appliances are more expensive than soft-drink and fast food and are not repeated buying products as fast food and soft-drinks (. It) means that the product features of home appliances are totally太绝对 different from fast food. Therefore, these two kinds of product cannot use the same strategy.
Thirdly, the arguer does not to figure out the true factors which contribute the decline of company sales but make a hasty conclusion that it is due to the advertisement. However, he can not rule out the possibilities that the quality or the style are the true factor of declining profit.如果展开论证会好一些，具体的例子
Finally, granted the advertisement can improve the sales, it does not guarantee that the use of such advertisement can absolutely improve the company profit. As we know, the profit does not only related with sales but the cost. If the cost of making advertisement is too high to within the budgets, the company also can not gain profit.讲一下cost为什么怎高
In sum, the arguer has not convinced (can hardly convince) us that the advertisement strategy should be adopted. To strengthen the argument, the arguer should analyze the real factors which contribute the decline of company sales and provide more convincing survey to support it.(and the evidence?)

攻击点应该没什么问题，但是没有重点展开。只有泛泛而论，没有重点攻击是我们很多人都存在的问题。建议看看imog的帖子~我当初看过之后收获很大！找一下，待会给你贴出来^-^   
快没热水了 ~~忙了一天，自己今天的作业还没写~~-_-|

cyfmltUID: 2180593

(By imong)
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=199905&extra=page%3D1

nostrumUID: 2124189

再次提醒修改格式

sunnie_518UID: 2136235

谢谢鸽子同学的意见哦