Issue51 米国有米小组第二次作业 请猛批吧~~~~~

ernest81888UID: 2247639

“Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and the interests of each student”
提纲
开头基本同意但，指出作者的话过于绝对
层次一： specially designed education 的优点
层次二： specially designed education 的缺点
层次三： Education be truly effective 需要 学生和老师的共同努力，而并不是只靠学校的specifically designed.
结尾首尾呼应
“Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and the interests of each student”

In today’s society, with the development of modern science, people live in the world became pursue for the efficiency, especially when it comes to education. In order to make education effective, some recommended that education should specifically designed to meet the individual needs and the interests of each student, which will lead to truly effective. Yet, this is far from the truth. Through the specifically designed education have a definite object in view ( 有的放矢) for some individual needs, it still seems like a hasty and extreme decision without a full view of the real world.

Admittedly, the method speaker recommend holds certain advantage in many respects. As the old saying said,” hobby is the best teacher for students”. It is true that students will pay more attention on which they are interested so that they can learn the knowledge faster, whereas lacking interest would not. Also it raises students’ creation on special field which make them have the possibility to reach certain achievement by giving them specifically designing education. By this education way the speaker claim, definitely, great motivation will help students in learning new things.

Despite all the advantages, the shortcomings of specifically designed education are equally, if not more, apparent. As is widely known, to meet each student’s needs and interest will certainly require education institution make a fully statistic then set each different course, which is a huge complicate work that might be impossible to complete. What’s more, even if this tiring task could be finished, this also comes to two problems 1) where can these different skilled teachers be found in order to take lessons for different courses for students.2) Can all these education institution possess the money to make the method work. Waste man power and money will not be advocate in contemporary society, not only on industrial project but also on education.

At last, I should say effective education is not only education institution’s business. Students also have the responsibilities. They must be jolt into believing in themselves as unique men and women who have the power to learn knowledge by selves then shape their own future. Only rely on the teaching-learning model will prevent students in forming their own idea, criteria standard or principles. In my view, truly effective educations need the cooperation :handshake of both schools and students. Education institution can designed in some learning field for most students interested in under the capacity of itself. As for the students side, they must giving up the idea that this is enough for them to learning skills under this kind of teaching method.

In sum, specifically designed education for student can be successful in developing the learning interest, and it may extend the change for students imagining the profound methodology. However, it also has its disadvantage like spending great money on develop on education methods and involved students into a stiff teaching-learning model. In the final analysis, the optimal approach is that school should do it according to its abilities and students are recommended to form their own learning skills not only by school but by themselves also.:hug:

[ 本帖最后由 ernest81888 于 2006-11-21 22:10 编辑 ]

sadskyUID: 146461

有个问题请问小马过河，像本篇一样对论题有褒有贬的论述是否会因为考虑周全而比较容易得到青睐，还是会被批评为观点模糊不确定呢？

ernest81888UID: 2247639

原帖由 sadsky 于 2006-11-22 15:40 发表
有个问题请问小马过河，像本篇一样对论题有褒有贬的论述是否会因为考虑周全而比较容易得到青睐，还是会被批评为观点模糊不确定呢？

:loveliness: 我也不知道也.......这是问组长学的,因为这样比较好写啊

sadskyUID: 146461

决定开新贴请教:) 顺便顶一下你的article (写的不错哦)

锡匠UID: 2266221

In today’s society, with the development of modern science, people live in the world [became pursue？] for the efficiency, especially when it comes to education. [In order to make education effective], some recommended that education should specifically designed to meet the individual needs and the interests of each student, [which will lead to truly effective]一句里面两个不会显得啰嗦无力么？. Yet, this is far from the truth. Through [though?] the specifically designed education have a definite object in view ( 有的放矢) for some individual needs, it still seems like a hasty and extreme decision without a full view of the real world.
Admittedly, the method [the] speaker recommend holds certain advantage in many respects. As the old saying said,” hobby is the best teacher for students”. It is true that students will pay more attention on [to] which they are interested [in?] so that [] they can learn the knowledge faster, whereas lacking interest [这个在这里做主语不合适 语法上是不是有点问题啊] would [do?] not. Also it raises students’ creation [creativity] on special field which make [-s]  them have the possibility to reach certain achievement [by giving them specifically designing education做主语的it里已经有这个意思了，如果觉得这样不明确，可以把giving…直接用来做主语，这样子有点重复和语法不明.] By this education [educational?]way the speaker claim, definitely, great motivation will help students in learning new things. [这句话的逻辑有点不清楚，可以把主语换成是students，或者更有力吧。Help这个词也可以换成一个语气更烈的词，论证会显得比较有力。By …..   ,students can get great motivation which can propel them to learn …?]
Despite all the advantages, the shortcomings of specifically designed education are equally, if not more, apparent. As is widely known, to meet each student’s needs and interest will certainly require education institution make a fully statistic then set each different course, which is a huge complicate work that might be impossible to complete. What’s more [我的一个外教老师曾经说过，中国的学生和老师都喜欢用这个词，但是她在美国几乎没见过这种用法。我不确定她到底对不对，但是既然我们有moreover，用个保险点的，也不错吧] , even if this tiring task could be finished, this also comes to two problems 1) where can these [different skilled teachers 这种用法我觉得有点奇怪] be found in order to take lessons for different courses for students.2) Can all these education institution possess the[enough?  或者用the的话，可以说the money needed] money to make the method [system 也行吧  词的多样性也是表现英文功底的方法] work. Waste man power and money [wasting human resource] will not be advocate [这里用现在时应该还好一些 和 advocated] in contemporary society, not only on industrial project but also on education. [觉得这一段的论点还好，但是论证可以更有力的]
At last, I should say effective education is not only education institution’s business. Students also have the responsibilities. They must be jolt into believing in themselves as unique men and [or?] women who have the power to learn knowledge by selves [then/用and then to 句子结构更清晰吧] shape their own future. Only rely on the teaching-learning model will prevent students in forming their own idea, criteria standard or principles. In my view, truly effective educations need the cooperation  of both schools and students. Education institution can designed in some learning field for most students interested in under the capacity of itself. [这一句意思有点模糊啊，该检查检查] As for the students side, they must giving [give] up the idea that this is enough for them to learning skills [to learn 就够了，加上skills反而是你对教育的理解显得狭窄了] under this kind of teaching method.
In sum, specifically designed education for student can be successful in developing the learning interest, and it may extend the change [chance/opportunity 这个动词可以这样用么？]  for students imagining the profound methodology. However, it also has its disadvantage like spending great money on develop on education methods and involved students into a stiff teaching-learning model. In the final analysis, the optimal approach is that school should do it according to its abilities and students are recommended to form their own learning skills [style  better?] [not only by school but by themselves also 这里有必要再把学校卷进来没？] 。

锡匠UID: 2266221

有些东西我也不肯定，但是觉得困惑的就提出来了个人觉得提出来比较好，对还是不对我想楼主懂得取舍啦
我觉得整篇文章的思路挺好的，但在每个分论点的论证时，总显得有点混乱。语法错误，这个我也很水，所以没有把握都指出来了，或者指出来的都对了，但是应该注意点。整篇都是论证，缺少事例，这是我们大家的问题啊。
继续加油。

ernest81888UID: 2247639

谢谢锡匠.....(由于他是带伤给我批作业的)
:)

bluecathyUID: 2231215

我胡乱地说下啦 看了锡匠给你改过的之后基本在看不出来什么了
但是这句“ it also has its disadvantage like spending great money on develop[是否应该是developing，或者这个develop和后面的education联系在一起，应该为development of education] on education methods and involved [如果是和前面的disadvantage like联系在一起，应该改为involving]students into a stiff teaching-learning model. ”

还有就是你似乎用can用得很多，在不耽误表达的情况下似乎还是用could好些。:)