Issue136 【米国有米】第8次作业 bluecathy

bluecathyUID: 2231215

Issue136"The absence of choice is a circumstance that is very, very rare."没有选择的情形非常少见。

[提纲]：
1.确实存在着没有选择的情况。没有办法选择父母、家庭条件、国家、民族，甚至无法选择出生的时间。
2.有时看似选择丰富，却并没有太多选择。
3.没有机会人可以创造机会，有志者事竟成，比如事业。
4.有机会但人们要求过高而显得没有机会了，比如找工作。

[正文]：
Do we always have opportunity to choose in our life? I don't think so. As human beings, we are historically and objectively determined without our own choices. It is true that we have no choice sometimes. We couldn't choose parents, family condition, even where we were born or when we will die. However, if we see from a broader view of our daily life, we do have choices mostly.

On one hand, sometimes we may think we have choices, but in fact, it is not so. For example, to wear more beautiful and fashion and show unique taste of one' own, some people always buy clothes of noted brands designed by famous fashion designers. Maybe they think that they have a great deal of choices among those famous brands, they could choose LV and abandon Prada, but there is nearly no choice actually. What they buy had been chosen by those designers firstly. Thus, when it comes to most of the industries of fashion which seem to exist lots of choices, people do have few choices.

On the other hand, sometimes we may think there is not any a choice around us, actually, choices exists everywhere in deed. As an old saying says, "where is a will, there is a way ". Although we may face the predicament and not know where to go, if our will is strong enough, we may create some ways and choices. Let us take famous director Ang Lee as the example. After graduating from New York University, Ang Lee hadn't got any opportunity to direct a movie for six years. Before he got the chance to direct <Pushing Hands> which gained a great many choices in later years in his homeland Taiwan, he stayed at home in New York with cooking for his family and writing screenplays which includes <Pushing Hands>. <Pushing Hands> made Ang Lee gain the golden prize in Berlin Film Festival and then get more and more opportunities to direct, now he is not a nameless graduate any more, he becomes a worldwide famous director and has been admitted by Oscar. Therefore, when people face the puzzledom, every little tiny effort may be the choice he makes for himself.

Another example is Magic Johnson, former Los Angeles Lakers player, who suffers from HIV for 16 years. At the very beginning, everybody thought there was no choice in his life and what waited for him was the death. Nevertheless, he struggled to stand up, faced up to life, and got back to the basketball court again. He has continually worked to educate and raise awareness of the disease, and even he devotes himself to business which also supports his cure of HIV by Triple cocktail. More and more choices Johnson had created in such a big depression tell us that when we are on the edge of life, when there is not any choice around us, if we could turn around, change ourselves and live actively, we may see a wonderful view. Just like Chinese philosopher said, "you couldn't decide the length of life, but you could choose to change its breadth; you couldn't decide the weather, but you could choose your mood; you couldn't decide your visage, but you could choose to smile; you couldn't control others, but you could choose to grasp yourself". Consequently, some circumstances that choices are absent may also mean that choices are everywhere.

Moreover, sometimes the absence of choice may be in respect that people require too much to see the choice around them. In today's society, competition between nations and individuals are more and more severe. There are fewer resources and more competitors which result in some people’s employment. However, some of the unemployed men are not because of the absence of choice but rather the high requirements they call for. For instance, many of my classmates graduated last year and have been unemployed so far. With their learning experiences, they could easily get a job to support their lives, nevertheless, what they intend to work as is the job with high social status, high salary and high welfare. They cried that there is no choice for them, but they never find that it is they who turn a blind eye to choice everywhere. Therefore, choice may not be absent from our life until we could look down to the earth under our feet rather than look forward to the peak which we're not able to reach now.

To sum up, the absence of choice may exist to some extent, however, there are a great many of alternatives for us in daily life, only when people intend to choose.  

第一次限时，语句惨不忍睹……

bailamo27UID: 2191717

Do we always have opportunity to choose in our life? I don't think so. As human beings, we are historically and objectively determined without our own choices. It is true that we have no choice sometimes. We couldn't choose parents, family condition, even where we were born or when we will die. However, if we see from a broader view of our daily life, we do have choices mostly.

On one hand, sometimes we may think we have choices(不好,改成:we think), but in fact, it is not so. For example, to wear more beautiful and fashion(典型的中式英语!to become more beautiful and more fashion..) and show unique taste of one' own, some people always buy clothes of noted brands designed by famous fashion designers. Maybe they think that they have a great deal of choices among those famous brands, they could choose LV and abandon Prada, but there is nearly no choice actually. What they buy had been chosen by those designers firstly. Thus, when it comes to most of the industries of fashion which seem to exist lots of choices, people do have few choices.(这个例子我没看懂是什么意思!:( 是所经过别人选择之后人们就没有选择了吗? 不太懂!)

On the other hand, sometimes we may think there is not any a(去掉) choice around us, actually, choices exists(exist) everywhere in deed.(整句话比较累赘,尝试修改简单些.) As an old saying says(不要2个say一起用,觉得别扭, 可以换成:as an old saying goes), "where is a will, there is a way ". Although we may face the predicament and not know where to go, if our will is strong enough, we may create some ways and choices(累赘,直接说creat chances or merical). Let us take famous director Ang Lee as the example. After graduating(graduated) from New York University, Ang Lee hadn't got any opportunity to direct a movie for six years. Before he got the chance to direct <Pushing Hands> which gained a great many choices(获得了很多机会,什么机会呢?后面缺少宾补!) in later years in his homeland Taiwan, he stayed at home in New York with cooking for his family and writing screenplays which includes <Pushing Hands>(不懂,到底是先拍了pushing hands还是先在家做饭呢?). <Pushing Hands> made Ang Lee gain the golden prize in Berlin Film Festival and then get(got) more and more opportunities to direct, now he is not a nameless graduate any more, he becomes a worldwide famous director and has been admitted by Oscar. Therefore, when people face the puzzledom, every little tiny effort may be the choice he makes for himself. (例子倒是不错,只说了他毕业侯6年没有机会导片,但并没突出写他是怎么努力怎么获得机会的啊!跟你的最后一句结论很不符合!)

Another example is Magic Johnson, former Los Angeles Lakers player, who suffers from HIV for 16 years. At the very beginning, everybody thought there was no choice in his life and what waited(was waiting) for him was the(cancle) death. Nevertheless, he struggled to stand up, faced(face 此处应该是同用前面的to) up to life, and got back to the basketball court again. He has continually worked to educate and raise awareness of the disease, and even he devotes himself to business which also supports his cure of HIV by Triple cocktail. More and more choices Johnson had created in such a big depression tell us that when we are on the edge of life(desperation), when there is not any choice around us, if we could turn around(what do you wanna mean here?), change ourselves and live actively, we may see a wonderful view(future). Just like Chinese philosopher said, "you couldn't decide the length of life, but you could choose to change its breadth; you couldn't decide the weather, but you could choose your mood; you couldn't decide your visage, but you could choose to smile; you couldn't control others, but you could choose to grasp yourself". Consequently, some circumstances that choices are absent may also mean that choices are everywhere.(wonderful sentences!!! 最后一句总结的句子也很好, 观点很有哲学性,不错!)

Moreover, sometimes the absence of choice may be in respect that people require too much to see the choice around them.(中文化得简直让人看不懂) In today's society, competition between nations and individuals are more and more severe. There are fewer resources and more competitors which result in some people’s employment. However, some of the unemployed men are not because of the absence of choice but rather the high requirements they call for. For instance, many of my classmates graduated last year and have been unemployed so far. With their learning experiences, they could easily get a job to support their lives, nevertheless, what they intend to work as(cancle) is the job with high social status, high salary and high welfare(连用三个high,显得词汇贫乏! 可以考虑换词: high social status, big payment and good/envied welfare). They cried(cry) that there is no choice for them, but they never find that it is they who turn a blind eye to choice everywhere(choices aroud them). Therefore, choice may not be(这里完全应该用肯定的语气,因为你前面的例子足够说明你的结论,所以应该理直气壮的得出结论,不要用may) absent from our life until we could look down to the earth under our feet rather than look forward to the peak which we're not able to reach now.

To sum up, the absence of choice may exist to some extent, however, there are a great many of alternatives for us in daily life, only when people intend to choose.(此句再斟酌一下吧)

总结:
1.全文看了后错误百出(对不起,我说话直,请原谅.),可能是限时的缘故吧,大家都是被时间弄得不行了,我也一样,一限时就不行了:(((
2.中文的提纲很不错, 但写成英语就有些中文化;
3.唯一的亮点是我用红笔标出的句子;倒数第二段的例子举得很好,身边的事情也很常见,人容易理解,获得同感,不错!
4.结尾太仓促,再考虑一下.