issue5

蔓草菊UID: 2195399

Issue5
A nation should require all its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college rather than allow schools in different parts of the nation to determine which academic courses to offer.
1开头：提出自己的观点（同意）
2 national curriculum的重要性
3 courses determined by schools 的不足
4 让步
5 总结
The primary school, junior and senior school are the important parts of the education system where students can receive education before entering the colleges. So, for the better development of the students some people argue that government should allow schools in different parts of the nation to determine the courses rather than require its students to study the same national curriculum before its students enter colleges. However, as far as I am concerned, I insist that national curriculum is more important than the course designed by the local schools for students before entering colleges..
On one hand, the national curriculum is better and more convenient for both educators and their students. We are in a society full of all kinds of knowledge and competition. We must try our best to know something elementary about various fields of knowledge from childhood. The national curriculum can insure the students receive the basic knowledge of science, art and so on. When the students acquire more and more knowledge and open their mind, they may find their interests, thus they can pursue their interesting courses in the colleges. In addition, with the same national curriculum, educators around the country can arrange and prepare the classes of the curriculum easily and when encountering some academic problems, they can exchange their minds. As for the students, they also can ask other students in different parts of the nation for help. If they have to move to new places for some reasons such as the transferring of their parents’work, they can adapt to the study life quickly due to the same curriculum regardless of the different schools.
On the other hand, if schools in different places determine the main courses, it may cause some disadvantages. Schools are likely to design their main courses depending on the local customs, economy, religion. Students taking those different courses may form sharply different knowledge levers although they are at the same age. Under this circumstance, it is hard for government or enterprises to figure out standards to evaluate students in different schools. Moreover, courses determined by local schools may constrain students in a narrow field, knowing nothing about culture and customs of other parts of the nation.
The proposal that before entering colleges students are required to take the same national curriculum does not mean that they have no freedom to chose courses determined by local schools. As a matter of fact, some courses determined by schools according to the local education lever, the properties and the interest of the local students can serve as the complementary knowledge. Students can learn a lot from this knowledge and understand their own culture deeply. To help the students develop a wide knowledge system, the national curriculum is compulsory, at the same time, courses designed by schools must be offered too.
In sum, the national curriculum can help the students acquire the elementary knowledge related to many aspects of the society and pave the way for the college life. At the same time, courses can serve as complementary knowledge to enrich students’ minds. Therefore, students in primary, junior and senior schools must take the national curriculum first and if time permits, they can chose the optional courses determined by local schools.

mh1988UID: 2189586

The primary school, junior and senior school are the important parts of the education system where students can receive education before entering the colleges. So, for the better development of the students some people argue that government should allow schools in different parts of the nation to determine the courses rather than require its students to study the same national curriculum before its students enter colleges. However, as far as I am concerned, I insist that(感觉有点重复，建议删掉i insisit that) national curriculum is more important than the course designed by the local schools for students before entering colleges..

On one hand, the national curriculum is better and more convenient for both educators and their students. We are in a society full of all kinds of knowledge and competition. We must try our best to know something elementary about various fields of knowledge from childhood. The national curriculum can insure（该词虽有确保之意，但最好还是换个词） the students receive the basic knowledge of science, art and so on. When the students acquire more and more knowledge and open their mind, they may find their interests, thus they can pursue their interesting courses in the colleges.（全是主动语态，而且主语相同，建议改下） In addition, with the same national curriculum, educators around the country can arrange and prepare the classes of the curriculum easily and when encountering some academic problems, they can exchange their minds. As for the students, they also can ask other students in different parts of the nation for help. If they have to move to new places for some reasons such as the transferring of their parents’work, they can adapt to the study life quickly due to the same curriculum regardless of the different schools.（这个理由挺好）

On the other hand, if schools in different places determine the main courses, it may cause some disadvantages. Schools are likely to design their main courses depending on the local customs, economy, religion. Students taking those different courses may form sharply different knowledge levers although they are at the same age. Under this circumstance, it is hard for government or enterprises to figure out standards to evaluate students in different schools. Moreover, courses determined by local schools may constrain students in a narrow field, knowing nothing about culture and customs of other parts of the nation.（这一段论证有力，理由充分。红色一句如果改成复合，两句并一句就完美了。）

The proposal that before entering colleges students are required to take the same national curriculum does not mean that they have no freedom to chose courses determined by local schools. As a matter of fact, some courses determined by schools according to the local education lever, the properties and the interest of the local students （这个定语显得太长，句子不好看，建议改个定语从句,which....）can serve as the complementary knowledge. Students can learn a lot from this knowledge and understand their own culture deeply. To help the students develop a wide knowledge system, the national curriculum is compulsory, at the same time, courses designed by schools must be offered too.（这一段似乎就只提了一个观点，几乎没有论证，一个简单的多学点知识就完了？如果没有深入一些的探讨，这段还不如没有）

In sum, the national curriculum can help the students acquire the elementary knowledge related to many aspects of the society and pave the way for the college life. At the same time, courses can serve as complementary knowledge to enrich students’ minds. Therefore, students in primary, junior and senior schools must take the national curriculum first and if time permits, they can chose the optional courses determined by local schools.

思路清晰，结构分明，论证不错，理由较充分。
但没什么事例支撑，几处句式略显呆板。