Argument147 sisong2003--Hamming小组作文第七次冲刺作业

sisong2003UID: 2154005

TOPIC: ARGUMENT147 - The following appeared in an editorial in a business magazine.

"Although the sales of Whirlwind video games have declined over the past two years, a recent survey of video-game players suggests that this sales trend is about to be reversed. The survey asked video-game players what features they thought were most important in a video game. According to the survey, players prefer games that provide lifelike graphics, which require the most up-to-date computers. Whirlwind has just introduced several such games with an extensive advertising campaign directed at people 10 to 25 years old, the age-group most likely to play video games. It follows, then, that the sales of Whirlwind video games are likely to increase dramatically in the next few months."
WORDS: 353          TIME: 上午 00:30:00          DATE: 2007-1-22
提纲：
1.       调查参与者可能不是10-25，因此不具代表性
2.       作者认为前两年销售下降可以通过引新游戏和广告改变
3.       草率认为未来几个月销售上升
In this argument the author claims that the sales of Whirlwind(W) video games are likely to increase in the next few months. To justify his claim, the author sites a recent survey of video-game players, and W has introduced several video-games according to the survey with an extensive advertising campaign. However, I find several logical fallacies in this argument, which make it unpersuasive.

To begin with, the reliability of the recent survey is suspected. The author unfairly deems the survey is representative of the general players that age from 10 to 25. However this is not necessarily the case. Perhaps the participants of the survey are not within the age-group from 10 to 25. Thus the result of the recent survey can not be representative of the video-game players aged 10 to 25. Without considering these possibilities, the author convinces me little.

In addition, the author rests on the assumption that the declining sales can be changed by the introduction of new lifelike video games and its advertising campaign. Yet it may not necessarily be the situation. It is entirely possible that the former declining sales of W video games were mainly due to its extremely high price and poor management. Or perhaps the declining sales of video-game is primary due to the poor ability of the advertising corporation that is also in charge of this advertising campaign, therefore the possibilities of changing declining sales is doubted. Without ruling out these possible factors, the author can not convince us.

Finally, the author hastily generalizes that the sales of W video games are most probable to increase remarkably in the next few months. Nevertheless, without considering some other video-game corporations that also introduce similar lifelike video games and may sell them in a lower price, the author's prediction may not happen. Moreover, if the price of the video games is so high that seldom can players afford or the whole economic situation is declining, the author can not simply draw this conclusion.

To sum up, this argument is not persuasive as it stands. To make it more logically acceptable, we should know more information about the participant players in the survey. Additionally, we need further information about the cause of the declining sales of W video games over the past two years.

打字太慢，拼写错误太多，argument模板都忘了，担心

graduate06UID: 2223299

我们接下来会多联系的，3天一篇，熟悉模板，提高速度，然后模考。

tomato217UID: 2126636

Inthis argument the author claims that thesales of Whirlwind(W) video games are likely to increase in the next fewmonths. To justify his claim, the author sites a recent survey of video-gameplayers, and W has introduced several video-games according to the survey withan extensive advertising campaign. However, I find several logical fallacies in this argument,which make it unpersuasive.

To begin with, the reliability of the recent survey is suspected. The authorunfairly deems the survey is representative of the general playersthat age from 10 to 25[10-25 years old]. However this is not necessarilythe case. Perhaps the participants of the survey arenot within the age-group from 10 to 25. Thus the result of the recentsurvey can not be representative of the video-game players aged 10 to 25[aged between 10 and 25]. Without considering these[this] possibilities, the author convinces me little.

In addition, the author rests on the assumption that the declining sales can bechanged by the introduction of new lifelike video games and its advertisingcampaign. Yet it may not necessarily be the situation. It is entirely possiblethat the former declining sales of W video games were mainly due to its extremely high price and poor management. Or perhaps thedeclining sales of video-game is primary due to the poor ability of theadvertising corporation that is also in charge of this advertising campaign,therefore the possibilities of changing declining sales is doubted. Withoutruling out these possible factors, the author can not convince us.[结尾比较空，应点明如果是这些原因，下降趋势不会改观]

Finally, the author hastily generalizes that the salesof W video games are most probable to increase remarkably in the next fewmonths. Nevertheless, without consideringsome other video-game corporations that also introduce similar lifelike videogames and may sell them in a lower price, the author's prediction may nothappen. Moreover, if the price of the video games is so high that seldom canplayers afford or the whole economic situation is declining, the author can notsimply draw this conclusion.[同样是结尾，空洞的套话不如在段子中多添加一段分析的话]

To sum up, this argument is not persuasive as it stands.To make it more logically acceptable, we should know more information[具体化，令可additionally后面不写，要写就要清楚明白] about the participant players in the survey. Additionally,we need further information about the causeof the declining sales of W video games over the past two years.

模版已经很成熟了，再在分析上多下点功夫就perfect了~
fighting！ ……^_^

sisong2003UID: 2154005

多谢！！！