Arguement159【Persistence小组】第12次作业

vinnieUID: 2104933

2.12
117The following is a memo from the business manager of Valu-Mart stores.
"Over 70 percent of the respondents to a recent survey reported that they are required to take more work home with them from the workplace than they were in the past. Since Valu-Mart has not seen impressive sales in its office-supply departments in the past, we should take advantage of this work-at-home trend by increasing at all Valu-Mart stores the stock of home office machines such as printers, small copy machines, paper shredders, and fax machines. We will also increase stock of office supplies such as paper, pens, and staplers. With these changes, our office-supply departments will become the most profitable component of our stores."
提纲：1 完成的工作量多多少，以及主要是什么工作
      2 并不是所有的商店都需要增加办公用品
      3 存货会增加风险，未必能盈利
In the above argument, according to the result of survey, the manager suggests that the store should take advantage of the work-at-home trend by increasing the home office machines and increase stock of office supplies. However, after further consider this argument, although the suggestion is specious there are some flaws in it.

First, the survey itself is lack of details. Author only tell us that over 70 percent of respondents are required to take more work home than they were in the past. But we need to know more about it such as what they usually do at home or the exact number of increased work. It is possible that although many people are required to do more jobs at home but the work is still a little. For example, a man needs to spend only five minutes more than before. I think he have no desire to buy printers, small copy machines and so on for only five minutes work. Despite of this, we still need to know which work people usually do at home. It is possible that employers are just required to send email to sum up one day’s work.  If so, the prediction that sales of home office machines will increase dramatically would be definitely wrong as most people can finish their job with computer.

Second, although sales of home office machines may rise, there is no need to increase the stock in all stores. As the manager said before, people get more work at home. We should only add the stock in the stores which are nearby the residents. As people who want to buy home office machines are most likely to choose the store near their home. For instance, the store which is near a factory can’t sell home office machines well because of lack of consumers.

Finally, even if the work-at-home is true, the company needs to do more to get more profit than just increase the stock. In the argument above, author mentions that Valu-Mart has not seen impressive sales in its office-supply department in the past. It is possible that there are other reasons despite the stocks, maybe the price Valu-Mart of is higher than other stores or the service of Valu-Mart is not quite well. However, the manager ignores the problems in this field and just alleges that office-supply departments will become the most profit component of the stores only though increasing the stock of home office machines.

In sum, I agree that it is quite possible that they may have impressive sales in office-supply department if they take advantage of work-at-home trend. But further investigation and survey about work-at-home trend, products and the stores’ situation are still needed before ultimate action.

Andy85UID: 2250503

In the above argument, according to the result of survey, the manager suggests that the store should take advantage of the work-at-home trend by increasing the home office machines and increase stock of office supplies. However, after further consider this argument  (这句话的主语是谁？), although the suggestion is specious there are some flaws in it. (这句不好理解啊：虽然这个建议徒有其表，其中还是有一些错误？specious本来就是个贬义词)

First, the survey itself is lack of details. Author only tell(s) us that over 70 percent of respondents are required to take more work home than they were in the past. But we need to know more about it such as what they usually do at home or the exact number of increased work. It is possible that although many people are required to do more jobs at home but the work is still a little. For example, a man needs to spend only five minutes more than before. I think he have no desire to buy printers, small copy machines and so on for only five minutes work. Despite of this, we still need to know which work people usually do at home. It is possible that employers are just required to send email(s) to sum up one day’s work.  If so, the prediction that sales of home office machines will increase dramatically would be definitely wrong as most people can finish their job with computer.

Second, although sales of home office machines may rise, there is no need to increase the stock in all stores. As the manager said before, people get more work at home. We should only add the stock in the stores which are nearby the residents. As people who want to buy home office machines are most likely to choose the store near their home. For instance, the store which is near a factory can’t sell home office machines well because of lack of consumers. (这点不错！)

Finally, even if the work-at-home (trend) is true, the company needs to do more to get more profit than just increase the stock. In the argument above, author mentions that Valu-Mart has not seen impressive sales in its office-supply department in the past. It is possible that there are other reasons despite the stocks, maybe the price (of) Valu-Mart [of] is higher than other stores or the service of Valu-Mart is not quite well. However, the manager ignores the problems in this field and just alleges that office-supply departments will become the most profit component of the stores only though increasing the stock of home office machines.

In sum, I agree that it is quite possible that they may have impressive sales in office-supply department if they take advantage of work-at-home trend. But further investigation and survey about work-at-home trend, products and the stores’ situation are still needed before ultimate action.

写的很不错了啊，语言很流畅，也很有说服力，赞一下！