Argument145 Spring－第二次作业

dairuxin512UID: 2178329

Argument145
A new study collected data that shows that people who snore are more likely to gain weight than are people who do not snore. It is well known that many people who snore also stop breathing frequently during the night for a few seconds, a condition called sleep apnea. The interruption of breathing wakes the person—often so briefly that the waking goes unnoticed—and can leave the person too tired during the day to exercise. Anyone who snores, therefore, should try to eat less than the average person and to exercise more.
用时：约1个半小时。字数：690。求好心人狂拍，我的英语语言基础不好，所以语法错误和用词不当会比较多。我会报恩的！谢谢。

提纲：
1、  这份研究是否可信：其数据的来源，调查的群体（大小，类型，随机性等），持续的时间，调查对象的生活习惯(是否这些调查对象有其他生活习惯导致肥胖，如食物的选择，疾病，遗传，体质，睡眠，运动情况等)
2、  即使研究确实可信，作者也不能单方面的认为就是因为打呼噜中的睡眠呼吸停顿导致了人肥胖，（作者的因果关系是：打呼噜――睡眠呼吸停顿――无力锻炼――缺乏锻炼――肥胖），情况可能是打呼噜是一种内分泌失调的外在表现。而实际上是内分泌失调导致了肥胖，或者是其他原因，如睡眠不好，消化不好，呼吸道问题，引起了打呼噜，而肥胖的产生有多种可能，没有证据证明它直接和睡眠呼吸停顿有关。
3、  作者另外还提出了所有打呼噜的人都要比正常人少吃多锻炼。这是荒谬的，一则所有引起打呼噜的原因不一样，有些甚至是缺少某些营养才会这样，更要多吃含有这些营养成分的食物了，二是为什么要和正常人比呢？也许这些肥胖的人需要减肥，是要控制一定的食量，再加上适当的锻炼，但是他们的身体需要的热量本来就比正常人多，说不定作者的建议会造成他们营养不良，导致低血糖和其他一些不良症状的产生。三是作者可能还忽略了其建议是否适用于每个人和一些其他更有效的建议，如果某肥胖人真的是内在问题（如激素过多），不仅仅是脂肪堆积问题，那么作者的建议就对他（她）没有效果，或者作者可以提出一些关于食谱的建议，因为有时肥胖是因为吃了太多高热量的东西，而缺少水果蔬菜和粗粮造成的。
In this argument, the speaker provides a study to show that people who snore are more likely to gain weight than people who do not snore. The author explains the reason is sleep apnea, a short interruption of breath that happened on people who snore, which can cause people feel tired during the day and unwilling to do exercise. Therefore, the arguer suggests anyone who snores should eat less than the average person and do more exercises. After closely examination of this suggestion and the reasons the author cited, however, I cannot believe it because of too many logical fallacies.

First of all, the author does not provide any evidence to convince me that the new study is credible. Therefore, I have enough reasons to doubt the resource of this study. Because it is a study, it must include an investigation. Then, how many people are there in the sample? How old are they? What about their sex rations? Does the production of these sample objects comply with the regulation of random? Or how long does the investigation last? After all, detecting one’s gaining weight or losing weight needs a certain long time observation. Besides, there may be other facts that cause people get fat, like physical condition, food choices, ills, genetic or exercises. Therefore, the reasons results in fatness are so complicated that the author should give concrete explanations to prove that the study he or she cited has recognized this complexity and has done reasonable analysis.

Secondly, even the study’s results truly descript a universal phenomenon in people who snore; lacking of strongly convincing evidence, we cannot believe the reason of the phenomenon is just so-called sleep apnea. The author thinks that snore generates sleep apnea, and sleep apnea causes people feeling tired and unwilling exercise, then, people gain weight because of lacks of exercises. The fact, however, might be that snore is only an apparent symptom of endocrine disorders, and it is endocrine disorders (like overdose hormone) that cause fatness. Or other reasons, for example, not well sleep, too much pressure or serious influenza, lead to snore, meanwhile, some other integrated facts causes fatness but I cannot explain. All in all, without any evidence to assure the direct correlation between sleep apnea and weight increase the author should not arbitrarily consider sleep apnea is the only or main reason for the explanation to the study.

Finally, the author suggests anyone who snore should try to eat less than the average person and exercise more. It is ridiculous. First: Due to the reasons result in gaining weight are different, it is possible that one person gets fat because he or she is shortage with some nutritional clement. So the best way to help the person is allowing he or she to eat more food containing plenty nutritional clement the patient lacks, not suggesting him or she to eat few. Second: Why make the compare of food quantity between fat people and average people? As we all know, fat people always need more energy than the averages, so if people who snore execute author’s suggestion and eat less than average people, they may suffer hypoglycemia, even faint. It is better for author to suggest that people who snore try to eat less then before. Third: the author neglect considering whether the suggestion fits to everyone, or whether there may exist some other better proposals. For example, if gaining weight is caused by endocrine disorders, author’s suggestion will lose its effects. And the author would better to give some proposals about recipes, since fatness is mostly caused by eating too much high caloric foods and lacking of vegetables, fruits and coarse grain.

In conclusion, the argument is logically unsound. To better persuade us to convince the suggestion, the author must provide enough evidence to the reliability and validity of the study. Furthermore, considerable and credible reasons of causing fat should be given out because snore might be only an apparent phenomenon. And the author should also explain whether his or her suggestion can fit everyone or parts of them; whether there might be other better proposals and what they are.

demerzelUID: 2415264

提纲：
1、  这份研究是否可信：其数据的来源，调查的群体（大小，类型，随机性等），持续的时间，调查对象的生活习惯(是否这些调查对象有其他生活习惯导致肥胖，如食物的选择，疾病，遗传，体质，睡眠，运动情况等)  
(这篇argue字数惊人！（敬仰中 ）我想对于这样个弱攻击来说，可以放在其他攻击之后组成一段)

2、  即使研究确实可信，作者也不能单方面的认为就是因为打呼噜中的睡眠呼吸停顿导致了人肥胖，（作者的因果关系是：打呼噜――睡眠呼吸停顿――无力锻炼――缺乏锻炼――肥胖），情况可能是打呼噜是一种内分泌失调的外在表现。而实际上是内分泌失调导致了肥胖，或者是其他原因，如睡眠不好，消化不好，呼吸道问题，引起了打呼噜，而肥胖的产生有多种可能，没有证据证明它直接和睡眠呼吸停顿有关。
3、  作者另外还提出了所有打呼噜的人都要比正常人少吃多锻炼。这是荒谬的，一则所有引起打呼噜的原因不一样，有些甚至是缺少某些营养才会这样，更要多吃含有这些营养成分的食物了，二是为什么要和正常人比呢？也许这些肥胖的人需要减肥，是要控制一定的食量，再加上适当的锻炼，但是他们的身体需要的热量本来就比正常人多，说不定作者的建议会造成他们营养不良，导致低血糖和其他一些不良症状的产生。三是作者可能还忽略了其建议是否适用于每个人和一些其他更有效的建议，如果某肥胖人真的是内在问题（如激素过多），不仅仅是脂肪堆积问题，那么作者的建议就对他（她）没有效果，或者作者可以提出一些关于食谱的建议，因为有时肥胖是因为吃了太多高热量的东西，而缺少水果蔬菜和粗粮造成的。

这个提纲很详细，也很到位，就是缺少一点 对于 snore和sleep apnea的关系没有提及，只提到了sleep apnea与肥胖的关系

In this argument, the speaker provides a study to show that people who snore are more likely to gain weight than people who do not snore. The author explains the reason is sleep apnea, a short interruption of breath that happened on people who snore, which can cause people feel tired during the day and unwilling to do exercise. Therefore, the arguer suggests anyone who snores should eat less than the average person and do more exercises. After closely examination of this suggestion and the reasons the author cited, however, I cannot believe it because of too many logical fallacies.

First of all, the author does not provide any evidence to convince me that the new study is credible. Therefore, I have enough reasons to doubt the resource of this study. Because it is a study, it must include an investigation. Then, how many people are there in the sample? How old are they? What about their sex rations? Does the production of these sample objects comply with the regulation of random? Or how long does the investigation last? （statistical data unreliable / study's subjects were inrepresentative）After all, detecting one’s gaining weight or losing weight needs a certain long time observation.  (恩，这个的确，记住了) Besides, there may be other facts that cause people get fat, like physical condition, food choices, ills, genetic or exercises. Therefore, the reasons results in fatness are so complicated that the author should give concrete explanations to prove that the study he or she cited has recognized this complexity and has done reasonable analysis.

Secondly, even the study’s results truly descript a universal phenomenon in people who snore; lacking of strongly convincing evidence, we cannot believe the reason of the phenomenon is just so-called sleep apnea. The author thinks that snore generates sleep apnea, and sleep apnea causes people feeling tired and unwilling exercise, then, people gain weight because of lacks of exercises. The fact, however, might be that snore is only an apparent symptom of endocrine disorders, and it is endocrine disorders (like overdose hormone) that cause fatness. Or other reasons, for example, not well sleep, too much pressure or serious influenza, lead to snore, meanwhile, some other integrated facts causes fatness but I cannot explain. All in all, without any evidence to assure the direct correlation between sleep apnea and weight increase the author should not arbitrarily consider sleep apnea is the only or main reason for the explanation to the study.（A correlatiohn is one of indication of a causl relationshi, but in itslf dose not suffice to prove such a relationship）

Finally, the author suggests anyone who snore should try to eat less than the average person and exercise more. It is ridiculous. (这样的猛词还是用其他的替换比较好)First: （不用冒号，用逗号即可）Due to the reasons result in gaining weight are different, it is possible that one person gets fat because he or she is shortage with some nutritional clement. So the best way to help the person is allowing he or she to eat more food containing plenty nutritional clement the patient lacks, not suggesting him or she to eat few. Second: Why make the compare of food quantity between fat people and average people? As we all know, fat people always need more energy than the averages, so if people who snore execute author’s suggestion and eat less than average people, they may suffer hypoglycemia, even faint. It is better for author to suggest that people who snore try to eat less then before. Third: the author neglect considering whether the suggestion fits to everyone, or whether there may exist some other better proposals. For example, if gaining weight is caused by endocrine disorders, author’s suggestion will lose its effects. And the author would better to give some proposals about recipes, since fatness is mostly caused by eating too much high caloric foods and lacking of vegetables, fruits and coarse grain.

In conclusion, the argument is logically unsound. To better persuade us to convince the suggestion, the author must provide enough evidence to the reliability and validity of the study. Furthermore, considerable and credible reasons of causing fat should be given out because snore might be only an apparent phenomenon. And the author should also explain whether his or her suggestion can fit everyone or parts of them; whether there might be other better proposals and what they are.

比我写的好，逻辑也很充分，就是字数太多了。。。我觉得400~500一篇argu 足以~~

就这样了，还望多多指教，谢