argument135 Spring-第二次作业

林周孟UID: 2341714

    argument135 Spring-第二次作业
    The following is a memorandum from the business manager of WLSS television station.
    “Over the past year ,our late-night news program has devoted increasingly more time to covering national news and less time to covering weather and local news.During the same time period,most of the complaints we received from viewers were concerned with the station’s coverage of weather and local news.In addition,several local businesses that used to run advertisements during our late-night news program have just cancelled their advertising contracts with us.Therefore,in order to attract more viewers to our news programs and to avoid losing any further advertising revenues,we should expand the coverage of weather and local news on all our news programs.


    Words:574    Time :70 minutes
In this memo, the business manager of WLSS television station recommend that they could attract more viewers to their news programs and to avoid losing any further advertising revenues by expanding the coverage of weather and local news on all their news programs.To support this recommendation the author points out the adjustment of their late-night news program Over the past year which has devoted increasingly more time to covering national news and less time to covering weather and local news.The authors contends that this adjustment should be responsible for most of the complaints they received from viewers who were concerned with the station’s coverage of weather and local news,and for the cancellation of their advertising contracts with everal local businesses.Howerer,through careful scrutiny,I find this argument depends on several unsubstantiated assumptions and is therefore unconvincing as it stands.
To begin with,the author fails to provide adequate evidence to prove that whether the number of the viewers who watched the late-night news program over the past year increased or not.It is entirely possible that the number of the viewers increased by leaps and bounds due to the adjustment last year , and therefore it is unreasonable to adopt the author’s recommendation which may ,on the contrary ,have a nagetive impact on the number of viewers who are interested in the program.
Morover,the author offers no information about the exact reason of the complaints ,even though we are told that the complaints is about the station’s coverage of weather and local news.However ,it is equally possible that the complaints have to do with the authenticity about the weather and local news,rather than the length of the weather and local news.Or perhaps not only the authenticity but also the length of weather and local news the program providesd can not satisfy the view.If this is the case, the company should try their best to improve the authenticity of the news as well as extend the length of the news.And therefore the recommendation is inadequate.
Another compelling argument is that the author provide little information about what “most of the complaints” means.Perhaps there are only two or three complaints who were concerned with the station’s coverage of weather and local news last year.If this is the case,then one or two complaints-which may be the most of two or three complaints-can not make any sound recommendation about the program.Thus,the author can not rely on this unsubstantiated assumption to draw the recommendation.
The final argument has to do with the exact reasons why the cancellation happened.The author contends that the adjustment of the program should be responsible for this cancellation,which is unsubstantiated.However,it is entirely possible that the companies which had  cancelled their advertising contracts with WLSS have a financial problem,or have changed the policy of advertising.Morover,we can not eliminate such possibility as more and more other companies have their advertising contracts with WLSS ,even though the several local companies had cancelled the contracts with WLSS.The author can not depend on this inadequate assumption to draw the recommendation for the reason that he or she fail to consider or rule out these possibilities.
In conclusion,the recommendation is not well supported.To strengthen it the author should not only provide the number of viewers before and after the adjustment,but also offer adequate information about how many viewers complainted.Morover,the author should find out the exact reasons why the several local businesses cancelled the advertising contracts with WLSS before he or she draw a sound recommendation.

lifeng_913UID: 2397925

你写错作业了 是ARGU145...不过我看下这个 帮改下语言上的错误吧,逻辑上的尽量了

lifeng_913UID: 2397925

In this memo, the business manager of WLSS television station recommend that they could attract more viewers to their news programs and to avoid losing any further advertising revenues by expanding the coverage of weather and local news on all their news programs. To support this recommendation, the author points out that (一般情况都加that以使长句子有明显的节奏性)the adjustment of their late-night news program over the past years which has devoted increasingly more time to covering national news and less time to covering weather and local news.The author then contends that this adjustment should be responsible for most of the complaints they received from viewers who were concerned with the station’s coverage of weather and local news, and acknowledges that for the cancellation of their advertising contracts with several local businesses. (感觉总结作者的话有点太长了,而且不是很连贯However, through careful scrutiny,I find this argument depends on several unsubstantiated assumptions and is therefore unconvincing as it stands.
To begin with,the author fails to provide adequate evidence to prove that whether the number of the viewers who watched the late-night news program over the past year increased or not.(whether...or not, 最好不要使用在段首句, 直接曲调whether, 说成to prove that the number of XX increased或者没有increased就可以了,要下定论.)It is entirely possible that the number of the viewers increased rapidly(by leaps and bounds作为副词性短语用在这里不太合适,影响语意表达,不如一个副词) due to the adjustment last year, if that is the case, it is unreasonable to adopt the author’s recommendation which may ,on the contrary ,have a negative impact on the number of viewers who are interested in the program.
Moreover,the author offers no information about the exact reason of the complaints ,even though we are told that the complaints are about the station’s coverage of weather and local news.(The mere fact that most of complaints received from viewers of WLSS were concerned with station’s coverage of weather and local news does not necessarily indicates that late-night news program suffers from loss of viewers.)However ,it is equally possible that the complaints have to do with the authenticity about the weather and local news,rather than the length of the weather and local news.Alternatively(应该用这个词,是ARGU的常用词汇,且确实是提出一种可能) perhaps not only the authenticity but also the length of weather and local news the program provided can not satisfy the view.If this is the case, the company should try their best to improve the authenticity of the news as well as extend the length of the news.Therefore,(不可将两个连词并用) the recommendation is inadequate.
Another compelling argument is that the author provides little information about what “most of the complaints” means.Perhaps there are only two or three complaints who were concerned with the station’s coverage of weather and local news last year.If this is the case,then one or two complaints-which may be the most of two or three complaints-can not make any sound recommendation about the program.Thus,the author can not rely on this unsubstantiated assumption to draw the recommendation.
The final argument has to do with the exact reasons why the cancellation happened. The author contends that the adjustment of the program should be responsible for this cancellation which is unsubstantiated.(不是非限制性定语从句) However, it is entirely possible that the companies, which had  cancelled their advertising contracts with WLSS,(写成非限定性定语从句的样子) have a financial problem,or have changed the policy of advertising.Moreover,we cannot eliminate such possibility as more and more other companies have their advertising contracts with WLSS ,even though the several local companies had cancelled the contracts with WLSS.The author can not depend on this inadequate assumption to draw the recommendation for the reason that he or she fail to consider or rule out these possibilities.
In conclusion,the recommendation is not well supported.To strengthen it the author should not only provide the number of viewers before and after the adjustment,but also offer adequate information about how many viewers complained. Moreover,the author should find out the exact reasons why the several local businesses cancelled the advertising contracts with WLSS before he or she draw a sound recommendation.



一个小的注意事项是 can not 要写成 cannot, doesn't尽量写成does not.

这篇ARGU由于没有看过，无法在逻辑上帮你很详细的修改，主要是进行些词汇、语言上的完善吧。


[ 本帖最后由 lifeng_913 于 2007-11-2 12:52 编辑 ]