ARGUMENT97 [5f 11-26]求拍

shuwenyingUID: 2233183

ARGUMENT97 [5f 11-26]求拍~
- The following appeared in a memo from the manager of television station KICK.
"A nationwide survey reveals that a sizeable majority of men would like to see additional sports programs on television. After television station WACK increased its sports broadcasts, its share of the television audience in its viewing area almost doubled. To gain a larger audience share in our area, and thus increase company profits, KICK should also revise its broadcast schedule to include more sports coverage."
WORDS: 647

In the memo, by citing the result of a nationwide survey and offering the experience of WACK as comparison, the author recommends that KICK should follow the WACK's example to include more sports programs in the broadcast schedules to increase audience and profits. Unfortunately, via careful review of the evidence and reasoning procedure, I cast doubt on the validity of the author's recommendation.

To begin with, the cited nationwide survey could hardly provide any credible support for the conclusion that the regions covered by KICK requires greater amount of sports programs. For one thing, the general situation of the nation as a whole fails to represent the specific condition in certain region such as the KICK's coverage area. Entirely possible is that the men in this regions display greater interest in other programs including the business news, political analysis and the like, provided that this regions might be metropolis, commercial center or capital of the country. For that matter, men of this area might experience heavier pressure on the breakneck speed of development of urban lives and exhibit less concern on recreational shows like competition programs as other men in more casual areas of the nation. For another, even if the men in this area require increase in the sports programs, the survey fails the take the ratio of men in the local population, or the ratio of men in the audience into consideration. Perhaps the men consist of merely minor part of the whole population or the audience of KICK thus increase in male audience might contribute little to increase the total amount. Moreover, the timing of the survey has been ignored. It is equally possible that the survey was performed during some major games or competition seasons of certain popular sports, leading to the requirement for increase in broadcast. Possible is the passion may fade away with the ending of the seasons. In a word, the nationwide survey seems to be insufficient evidence to demonstrate the increasing demand for sports programs.

Furthermore, the successful example of WACK might hardly be replicated in KICK due to a series of dissimilarities between the regions covered by the two stations respectively. Firstly, the ratio of female and male audience of the two stations might be different, resulting in contradicting outcomes of the similar policies. As common sense informs, men tend to be fond of sports programs whereas women favor recreational shows. For that matter, if the rate of men of KICK's audience contributes minor to the total amount, KICK is unlikely to double their share of audience by the same means as WACK. Likewise, the consideration of timing of the policy, the life style of the two regions should not be left of out consideration as I have pointed out in the previous paragraph. Secondly, another difference between the two regions lies in the popularity of TV as source of information of sports. It is entirely possible that the men in KICK viewing area prefer listening to sports news via radio while the men in WACK area favor television news. Therefore, the author could hardly convince that KICK could benefit from WACK's policy without excluding these dissimilarities.

Finally, given the audience share manage to increase, the company profits may not increase as a result for the profitability is associated with numerous other factors. On the one hand, the income of KICK with advertisement investment as a major source might be decrease attributed to countless reasons such as economic withdraws, flawed market policies of KICK or poor quality of advertisement designs. On the other hand, the cost of the company in its normal running could increase by unhealthy management, financial arrangement or increasing salaries of the employees. Therefore, before thorough analysis of the income and cost of the company, it is too hasty to predict the increase of profits by merely increasing the audience share.

In sum, suffering from several flaws, the manager's recommendation seems unsounded to me. To the bolster the reasoning procedure, the manager should at a minimum demonstrate that the nationwide survey is applicable as a predictor of the KICK’s viewing regions. Moreover, the dissimilarities between WACK and KICK coverage area, as well as other interrupting factors in gaining the profits must be ruled out before the manage could convince me.

shalonbasUID: 2184474

In the memo, by citing the result of a nationwide survey and offering the experience of WACK as [a]comparison, the author recommends that KICK should follow the WACK's example to include more sports programs in the broadcast schedules to increase audience and profits. Unfortunately, via careful review of the evidence and reasoning procedure, I cast doubt on the validity of the author's recommendation.

To begin with, the cited nationwide survey could hardly provide any credible support for the conclusion that the regions covered by KICK requires [require] greater amount of sports programs. For one thing, the general situation of the nation as a whole fails to represent the specific condition in certain region such as the KICK's coverage area. Entirely possible is that the men in this regions display greater interest in other programs including the business news, political analysis and the like, provided that this regions might be metropolis, commercial center or capital of the country. For that matter, men of this area might experience heavier pressure on the breakneck speed of development of urban lives and exhibit less concern on recreational shows like competition programs as other men in more casual areas of the nation. For another, even if the men in this area require increase in the sports programs, the survey fails the take the ratio of men in the local population, or the ratio of men in the audience into consideration. Perhaps the men consist of merely minor part of the whole population or the audience of KICK thus increase in male audience might contribute little to increase the total amount. Moreover, the timing of the survey has been ignored. It is equally possible that the survey was performed during some major games or competition seasons of certain popular sports, leading to the requirement for increase in broadcast. Possible is the passion may fade away with the ending of the seasons. In a word, the nationwide survey seems to be insufficient evidence to demonstrate the increasing demand for sports programs. [很强大的论述，赞~~]

Furthermore, the successful example of WACK might hardly be replicated in KICK due to a series of dissimilarities between the regions covered by the two stations respectively. Firstly, the ratio of female and male audience of the two stations might be different, resulting in contradicting outcomes of the similar policies. As common sense informs, men tend to be fond of sports programs whereas women favor recreational shows. For that matter, if the rate of men of KICK's audience contributes minor to the total amount, KICK is unlikely to double their share of audience by the same means as WACK. Likewise, the consideration of timing of the policy, the life style of the two regions should not be left of out consideration as I have pointed out in the previous paragraph. Secondly, another difference between the two regions lies in the popularity of TV as source of information of sports. It is entirely possible that the men in KICK viewing area prefer listening to sports news via radio while the men in WACK area favor [感觉你很喜欢用favor这个词，这里可以考虑换成prefer] television news. Therefore, the author could hardly convince that KICK could benefit from WACK's policy without excluding these dissimilarities.

Finally, given the audience share manage to increase, the company profits may not increase as a result for the profitability is associated with numerous other factors. On the one hand, the income of KICK with advertisement investment as a major source might be decrease[d] attributed to countless reasons such as economic withdraws, flawed market policies of KICK or poor quality of advertisement designs. On the other hand, the cost of the company in its normal running could increase by unhealthy management, financial arrangement or increasing salaries of the employees. Therefore, before thorough analysis of the income and cost of the company, it is too hasty to predict the increase of profits by merely increasing the audience share.

In sum, suffering from several flaws, the manager's recommendation seems unsounded to me. To the bolster the reasoning procedure, the manager should at a minimum demonstrate that the nationwide survey is applicable as a predictor of the KICK’s viewing regions. Moreover, the dissimilarities between WACK and KICK coverage area, as well as other interrupting factors in gaining the profits must be ruled out before the manage could convince me.


[没啥好说的，结构清晰，逻辑严密，论述仔细，语言到位。偶尔有几个小语法错误，不伤大雅。很强悍的一篇ARG。

唯一的疑问，不知道楼主这篇文章花了多久写成，又经过了多少次修改。如果是直接上机所做就已经无敌了，如若不是，那最好现在尽快开始限时模拟，我感觉限时的文章水平一般都不如自己不限时的水平高。

仰慕~~
]

shuwenyingUID: 2233183

真是让我都不好意思了！
这是限时45分钟写成，改了错字，然后就贴上来了。
我打算先限时45分钟，再40分钟。再35……

[ 本帖最后由 shuwenying 于 2007-11-27 23:46 编辑 ]

lestouUID: 2260126

偶也小拍一下.字数上有点恐怖啊,可怕ING.

45MIN也还不错啦.
我昨天也是30MIN完成,CORRECT就放了出来,结果:funk: :funk:以后还是不能偷懒啊
1 NEVERTHELESS,还是应该自己读一遍,自己永远是最好的阅卷人,别人再怎么认真修改也不可能比你自己熟悉,文章最后还是要自己改的,这样才会有收获.这个道理你应该明白.

2文章的思路按照题目的先后顺序来反驳,依次是1 SURVEY以全盖偏,2 FALSE ANALOGY OF TH E TWO REGION 3 OTHER FACTORS IN DECIDING THE PROFIT这点我倒是和你达成了一至,(顺序思路都一样,比较传统啊,呵呵)因为我也是这样写的.----------如果你有新的思路,请通知我

3 另外还有个问题我要说下,如果不是合适的地方,尽量别去炫耀你的词汇.不是说文章里BT的词多就好,而是要把每个词都放到合适的地方.
这就好象你看到中文里,明明可以说"你吃饭了吗?" 你却偏偏要说"你用膳了吗",这也不符合正常人的习惯.

就选你用的最多的摸板中的例子吧,比如TO BOLSTER YOUR VIEW,明明是可以TO SUPPORT YOUR VIEW你却偏要故意买弄,要知道改卷人是地道的NATIVE PROFESSOR,有必要吗?.
再如:AT MINIMUM . 可能反而不如AT LEAST

当然只是个人观点,文章的流畅和逻辑永远是最重要的.

[ 本帖最后由 lestou 于 2007-11-28 19:48 编辑 ]