issue13 还有几天了,大家帮忙改改啊:)

jcjc小猪UID：2132081

13. "Many of the world's lesser-known languages are being lost as fewer and fewer people speak them. The governments of countries in which these languages are spoken should act to prevent such languages from becoming extinct."
世界上很多的小语种都快要消失了，因为越来越少的人在使用这些语言。使用这些小语种的国家应该采取行动以防止这样的语言逐渐销声匿迹。

反全球化问题之小语种与政府保护


Without the protection of the government in which the world's lesser-known languages are being lost as fewer and fewer people speak them, these languages will undoubtly becoming extinct, as the speaker claims. Admittedly,  it is true that government act on the correct philosophical side of this issue to prevent it from extinct. Nevertheless, the speaker might ignore the fact whether the lauguages are in need of protection, if any, further the action taken by the government is effective in any sense. In my standpoint, both positive and negative points of this issue call for a balance.
To begin with, the prevention made by government is well-recongnized, if somewhat obscurely, on the whole perspective.For one thing, the preservation of these lesser-known languages can play a key role in making their own culture different from others.One compelling example involves China, a multi-nation country.Each nation gifted with a specific culture preserves an instinct language-- the words are speacial, the rhythms are speacial, even the tones are speacial.From the speacial languages in which most of them are applied only in a small community we can predict their custom , characteristic, and history without effort. what is more, it is considered as an important and usually applied tool for historians or archeologists to do researches relative to the local culture, and also help people outside their small circle better understand them and their ancestors, thus promote the communications over the world. For another thing, the lesser-known languages can be used for certain military purpose, if any, in that to make the messages secret from outsiders. one apt illustration can best illustrate this conclusion. In World War two,when a hard time struggling with the japanese army on the battle, the us. decided to take Latin language which is a so-called 'lesser-known languages" into use as a hidden message conveying to the frontier.As a result, it proved a true effectiveness hepling the us. army win the battle and carve a palce for themselves to successed in following battles from that time on.Therefore, it is that the lesser-known language that act as an important role whether on a nation level or on a country level.
Yet, some one might argue that it is unnecessary to protect the lesser-known language in the process of globalization since the world is in need of frequent communications greatly.On the contrary the lesser-known language may hamper the communications and understanding between people with different words. For example, English in modern society is acting as a standard language over the world, especially in national politic meeting, business and academic exchange.Accordingly to promote the developmenmt of the country and enhance the living , government should place more emphasis on the education of English ,rather than that of other lesser-known language, when one considers all the potential use of our money, energy and time.Furthermore, government's protection of the lesser-known language is effortless to some extent which the language would be extinct by the laws of nature no matter how hard the government try to protect it since it is no meaningful any longer. It is clear that whether to prevent the language should be decided by the residents who use it in quotidian life ,instead of the government who only do it on politic purpose. And it is always the case that although great effort is put on , the language will be replaced by other frequently-used one without doubt. Therefore, government should spend the money on more effective matters rather than unmeaningful things.
To sum up, the prevention of the lesser-known language from being extinct does serve to play a positive role in integrating the whole culture. yet, certain undue and unnecessary effort may harmful to the whole society , rather than benefit. In the final analysis, I fundamentally agree with the speaker.

[ Last edited by staralways on 2005-8-27 at 11:25 ]

fantasianosUID：207837

说明：如果没有附加提示，则为在该处添加；如果有括号，则为替换
Without the protection of the government in which the world's lesser-known languages are being lost as fewer and fewer people speak them, these languages will undoubtly undoubtedly becoming extinct, as the speaker claims. Admittedly, it is true that government acts on the correct philosophical side of this issue to prevent it from extinction. Nevertheless, the speaker might ignore the fact whether the lauguages (languages)去掉the are in need of protection, if any, further the action taken by the government is effective in any sense 后半句不是太清楚你的意思，我的理解不够或是表达有点问题？如果你是想说“如果政府的行为是有用的”， 不妨改为：if any further action taken by government could be effective in any sense你觉得呢？. In (From) my standpoint, both positive and negative points of this issue call for a balance. 这一句表达也怪怪的，直接解释是：正方要求平衡，反方也要求平衡。而不是（我猜）你想表示的“需要在正反方作出平衡”，改为：a balance between positive points and negative ones is needed.

To begin with, the prevention made by government is well-recongnized (well-recognized), if somewhat obscurely, on the whole perspective. 什么叫“是普遍认识到的，如果有某种模糊”？你是不是想说：the prevention made by government is well-recognized to some extent. For one thing, the preservation of these lesser-known languages can play a key role in making their own culture different from others. One compelling example involves China, a multi-nation 是想说“多民族”吗？multiethnic country. Each nation gifted with a specific culture preserves an instinct language-- the words are special (special), 后面同，不过最好用同义词替换，specific之类的, the rhythms are speacial, even the tones are speacial. From the speacial languages in which most of them (… languages most of which) are applied only in a small community we can predict their customs, characteristics, and historys without much effort. what is more, it is considered as an important and usually applied tool for of historians or archeologists to do researches relative to the local culture, and also help people outside their small circles better understand themselves and their ancestors, thus promote the communications over (around) the world. For another thing, the lesser-known languages can be used for certain military purpose, if any, in that (by which) to make the messages secret from outsiders. one apt illustration can best illustrate this conclusion. In World War two, when去掉when a hard time struggling with (fighting against) the japanese (Japanese) army on in the battle, the us. (Chinese army) decided to take Latin language which is (was) a so-called 'lesser-known languages" into use (in usage) as a hidden message conveying to the frontier. As a result, it proved a true effectiveness hepling (helping) the 去掉 the us. Our army win (won) the battle and carved a palce (place) for themselves to successed (succeed) in the following battles from that time (then) on. Therefore, it is that 去掉that the lesser-known language that acted as an important role no matter whether on a nation (ethnic) level or on a country level.

Yet, some one might argue that it is unnecessary to protect the lesser-known languages in the process of globalization since the world is in need of frequent communications greatly. On the contrary 因为这里不是和上一句形成对比，所以这里再用on the contrary不是很合适；应该用并列或因果的关系，比如in this sense the lesser-known language may hamper the communications and understanding between people with different words 这里words不合适，改成speaking different languages. For example, English in modern society is acting as a standard language over the world, especially in national politic (international political) meetings, businesses and academic exchanges. Accordingly (In order) to promote the developmenmt (development) of the country and enhance the living level, government should place more emphasis (emphases) on the education of English ,rather 去掉rather than that of other lesser-known languages, when one considers all the potential use (usage) of our money, energy and time. (considering all the potential…) Furthermore, government's protection of the lesser-known language is effortless (effectless) to some extent which (because) the language would be extinct by (as a result of) the laws of nature no matter how hard the government try (tries) to protect it since it is no meaningful any longer. It is clear that whether to prevent the language should be decided by the residents who use it in quotidian life, instead of the government who only do (utilize) it on politic purpose. And it is always the case that although great effort is put on, the language will be replaced by other frequently-used ones without doubt. Therefore, government should spend the money on more effective matters rather than unmeaningful things.

To sum up, the prevention of the lesser-known language from being extinct does serve to play a positive role in integrating the whole culture. yet, certain undue and unnecessary effort may be harmful to (be harmful for)或(do harm to) the whole society , rather than benefitial. In the final analysis 如果是想说总的来说，则(As a final conclusion)；如果是说在最后一个方面，则(in the final aspect), I fundamentally agree with the speaker.

1．刚一COPY到WORD里就出现了一大堆的红、绿线，建议以后发帖前先自己检查一下初级错误：拼写、大小写等；
2．很多地方用复数更合适：因为所有者是复数，而他们不可能同时共用一个东西
3．词性、词义掌握有的不是很准确，可以多查查词典
4．最影响理解的不是以上的问题，而是整体的表达，可以多看些正宗的英文，像是很多人推荐的新概念什么的
总评：题目的思想基本上理解了，也得到了比较充分的思考，但是表达真的很重要。继续努力！加油！！

fantasianosUID：207837

昨天因为有别的事，没来得及改出来，希望今天不是太晚：）

[ Last edited by fantasianos on 2005-8-28 at 21:10 ]

elvazhang1022UID：208363

楼主，强烈建议注意分段，段与段之间最好空一行，比较清晰，还有就是一段最好不要过长哦！