issue5 处子作（45分钟限时） 请各位赐教

yuemingjushiUID：2108406

自我感觉还是语言问题比较大。
Issue5:
A nation should require all its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college rather than allow schools in different parts of the nation to determine which academic courses to offer.

Is it necessary for a nation to require all its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college rather than allow schools in different parts of the nation to determine which academic courses to offer? The speaker claims so. Critics of this assertion argue that one nation should rather introduce more ethnic studies than the national core curriculum. Anyway, from several aspects of human beings' experience, I suggest a balance in which there are both national core curriculum and ethnic studies. As illustrated by the following discussion.
  National curriculum can guarantee that everyone could gain the most basic skills and the same perspectives on value, which would put them to a same start line when they begin their college lives. It is based on the conception of conformity and justice, in order that educators of colleges could easily select the best fitful curriculum for their freshmen. If there's no such a national core curriculum, it is a very tough work to arrange curriculum in college, since educators get no idea on what they have learned before entering college. If one does not know anything about calculus, how can he or she get any progress in the classroom of college physics? And if, there is someone who has learned c program before college, the educator put this subject into the college curriculum, it is clearly a waste of time. Furthermore, students under different culture will as well bring troubles to their college life. As a result, a national core curriculum is essentially needed.
  However, there are several disadvantages of such national core curriculum. For example, we can not rule out the possibility that education is controlled by some of the educators to reflect his or her dogma. Considering the facts that a political party has win the power to arrange education, we may only unfortunately expect they add some political ideas of their own to the teaching materials. This will inevitably leads to a bias in students’ mind, which are undoubtedly more harm than good. Ignorant students can learn little from such national curriculum.
  Ethnic study is not only a effective way to maintain the diversity in college but also a useful method in which students could understand the culture and history of the world more objectively. For instance, a student who has completed his primary school in New York and graduated from a secondary school in Los Angeles is hard to be ruled by the thinking of educators in either of these two places. And Afro-Americans are entitled to keep their own culture by this policy. As is so often pointed out, which facilitates the communications among different cultures, diversity is a thing of great significance.
  To sum up, without national core curriculum it is difficult for the college educators to arrange courses for their freshmen, which would necessarily causes conflicts between students from different backgrounds; without ethnic studies there will be a lack of diversity which would change colleges into a dull place that no one is willing to go to. National core curriculum assure the stability of education while ethnic studies add color to it.

yuemingjushiUID：2108406

没有人怕么？郁闷中

monkeydryUID：183691

Issue5:
A nation should require all its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college rather than allow schools in different parts of the nation to determine which academic courses to offer.

Is it necessary for a nation to require all its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college rather than allow schools in different parts of the nation to determine which academic courses to offer? The speaker claims so. Critics of this assertion argue that one nation should rather introduce more ethnic studies than the national core curriculum. Anyway, from several aspects of human beings' experience, I suggest a balance (between)in which there are both national core curriculum and ethnic studies. (i suggest a balance between the national core curriculum and ethnic studies简练些)As illustrated by the following discussion.(一个完整的句子?)
  National curriculum can guarantee that everyone could gain the most basic skills and the same perspectives on value, which would put them to a same start line when they begin their college lives. It is based on the conception of conformity and justice, in order that educators of colleges could easily select the best fitful curriculum for their freshmen. If there's no such a national core curriculum, it is a very tough work to arrange curriculum in college, since educators get no idea on what they have learned before entering college. If one does not know anything about calculus, how can he or she get any progress in the classroom of college physics? And if, there is someone who has learned c program before college, the educator put this subject into the college curriculum, it is clearly a waste of time. Furthermore, students under different culture will as well bring troubles to their college life(复数). As a result, a national core curriculum is essentially needed.
  However, there are several disadvantages of such national core curriculum. For example, we can not rule out the possibility that education is controlled by some of the educators to reflect his or her dogma. Considering the facts that a political party has win the power to arrange education, we may only unfortunately expect they add some political ideas of their own to the teaching materials. This will inevitably leads(lead) to a bias in students’ mind, which are(does) undoubtedly more harm than good. Ignorant students can learn little from such national curriculum.
  Ethnic study is not only a(n) effective way to maintain the diversity in college but also a useful method in which students could understand the culture and history of the world more objectively. For instance, a student who has completed his primary school in New York and graduated from a secondary school in Los Angeles is hard to be ruled by the thinking of educators in either of these two places.(这个例子好象有点问题,不是很扣题) And Afro-Americans are entitled to keep their own culture by this policy. As is so often pointed out, which facilitates the communications among different cultures, diversity is a thing of great significance.
  To sum up, without national core curriculum it is difficult for the college educators to arrange courses for their freshmen, which would necessarily causes conflicts between students from different backgrounds; without ethnic studies there will be a lack of diversity which would change colleges into a dull place that no one is willing to go to. National core curriculum assure(s) the stability of education while ethnic studies add color to it.
总体而言不错,就是那个例子有些问题,ethnic education并不是指在一个地方上学然后跑到另一个地方,其实把那个afro-american写详细些就好了.

yuemingjushiUID：2108406

thank you very much

chachachenqiUID：2124291

感觉ethnic study的优势方面阐发不够。
且有偷换概念的嫌疑。
“academic courses set by local goverment”&"ethnic study"可以在一些领域相同，但是还是有区别的。
我觉得，似乎可以从教授方式、课程设计等方面来探讨。

限时能写这么好，佩服啊。

yuemingjushiUID：2108406

这个问题很有参考价值，太感谢了
马上就考了，还犯这么严重的错误，不要佩服我