issue196 V6站队 7.28

dinddind2003UID：196353

ISSUI 196
题目 ：Technology creates more problems than it solves, and may threaten or damage the quality of life

提纲：
1。技术是引发了很多问题，要解决需要人们的理解，宽容和自我反省而不是抱怨科学
2。但是技术实现了人们的许多梦想
3。技术也改善了人们的生活



It is true that technology causes many problems that threaten our lives, but it also creates many miracle that largely improves our daily life.

Admittedly, when people use technology in a wrong way it does damage our lives. One example is traffic jam which we may meet everyday. Advanced techniques give us faster cars, however when people produce more and more, the speed of our cars are limited when these cars meet each other.Another example is that mobile phones deprive our private time. Although mobile phones give us the possibilities to communicate with each other at any time, yet assume that when a person is watching his (or her) favorite movie there comes a call that tells he (or she) that an important meeting is waiting for he(or she),so maybe the mobile phone inventers should make their inventions power off at a fixed time everyday. There are still more problems such as war and pollution which result from people using technology for their own interest. To solve these problems people need tolerance, comprehension and  self-respect but not complaining of technology.     

However, technology makes many dreams belonged to our ancestors come into reality. Hundreds years ago scientists controverted whether the sun goes around the earth or the earth goes around the sun, yet now people can run on the moon if they want; thousands years ago our ancestors longed for rain when they met droughts   which   might destroy their crops yet now people can create a rain at proper time and at a proper place. (Nearly in every field as medical, industry, traffic and communication human make the impossible things regarded by their ancestors possible.这一句是我加的，用以阐述本段主题)Thus, technology gives people the power that takes many things which were seem as mysterious by our ancestors in control.

Furthermore ,technology largely improves quantity of life. Hundreds years ago it takes Marco Polo seventeen years to go from west to east through the Silk Road, yet now people can go round the earth in a few hours; hundreds years ago people used beacon to transform information yet now no matter how far between two persons, they can speak to each other the moment they pick up their telephone. Still, technology gives people coolness in hot summer; gives people summer fruits in cold winter; gives people machines which have tremendous strength; gives people precise instruments which can plant into human bodies .Hardly anyone would like to go back to the period even 50 years ago when technology was backward. Look around, hardly any thing which is helpful to our dally life today have no relevance with technology. Thus, technology makes our lives more comfortable.


To sum up, technology does give people some problems because of people’s evil methods, but people gain much more benefits than harms through technology. If people cast technology away no one would know what a terrible world we might meet.

mkb57288UID：2105771

占位子:)

mkb57288UID：2105771

It is true that technology causes many problems that threaten our lives, but it also creates many miracle that largely improves our daily life.（感觉题目关键是那个more最好能在文章中形成比较）

Admittedly, when people use technology in a wrong way it does damage our lives. One example is traffic jam which we may meet everyday. Advanced techniques give us faster cars, however when people produce more and more, the speed of our cars are limited when these cars meet each other.（One telling example manifest itself in the everyday rush hour, which springs from the overreliance on the conveniance of car, which definitely cause both time waste and pollution）Another example is that mobile phones deprive our private time. Although mobile phones give us the possibilities to communicate with each other at any time, yet assume that when a person is watching his (or her) favorite movie there comes a call that tells he (or she) that an important meeting is waiting for he(or she),so maybe the mobile phone inventers should make their inventions power off at a fixed time everyday. （后面这个例子个人感觉有一点点不合适，另外占的篇幅有点长，为论点服务，不要喧宾夺主）/color]可以用鳖的例子一句话带过The atomic technology, originally taken as the blessing for the destitution of energy, caused hundred and thousand of murders in world WarII, which can never be taken as a good way of use.There are still more problems such as war and pollution which result from people using technology for their own interest. To solve these problems people need tolerance, comprehension and  self-respect but not complaining of technology.     
（虽然例子稍稍多了一点，但是意思表达得很明确了，主要目的达到了）

However, technology makes many dreams belonged to our ancestors come into reality. Hundreds years ago scientists controverted whether the sun goes around the earth or （改成otherwise，后面删）the earth goes around the sun, yet now people can run on the moon if they want; thousands years ago our ancestors longed for rain when they met droughts   which   might destroy their crops， yet now people can create a rain at proper time and at a proper place. (Nearly in every field as medical, industry, traffic and communication human make the impossible things regarded by their ancestors possible.这一句是我加的，用以阐述本段主题)（个人觉得这一句加得好）Thus, technology gives people the power that takes many things which were seem as mysterious by our ancestors in control.（但是总觉得这一段离题目内容远了一点）

Furthermore ,technology largely（significantly） improves quantity of life. Hundreds years ago it takes Marco Polo（老熟人，呵呵） seventeen years to go from west to east through the Silk Road, yet now people can go round the earth in a few hours; hundreds years ago people used beacon to transform information yet now no matter how far between two persons, they can speak to each other the moment they pick up their telephone. Still, technology gives people coolness in hot summer; gives people summer fruits in cold winter; gives people machines which have tremendous strength; gives people precise instruments which can plant into human bodies （很喜欢用排比句例子嘛，不过确实用得还不错）.Hardly anyone would like to go back to the period even 50 years ago when technology was backward. Look around, hardly any thing which is helpful to our dally life today have no relevance with technology. Thus, technology makes our lives more comfortable.


To sum up, technology does give people some problems because of people’s evil methods, but people gain much more benefits than harms through technology. If people cast technology away no one would know what a terrible world we might meet.总体感觉还不错，大家一起继续努力吧

mkb57288UID：2105771

哦哦，怎么都变红了:L:L:L

dinddind2003UID：196353

谢谢mkb57288 ，你说的很有道理，我再研究研究，有疑问我短信问你。

dinddind2003UID：196353

仔细看了一下，感觉你的语言功底很好啊，怎么培养的啊？

mkb57288UID：2105771

哪有，给人改文章不用限时，才能写一点凑合的句子:L:L:L

dinddind2003UID：196353

呵呵，总之有像你这样的人在我们对真是收获阿