进军美利坚，作文组作业--豆豆

独眼豆豆UID: 2692023

第一次动笔写作文。脑子根本转不起来，写了1个小时。。。。
谢谢点评的同学。

9.28.同意不同意：一个聪明的朋友比一个幽默的朋友重要
Human is an advanced animal that live in a community. No one is isolated in this world and everyone must have some connections with others, one of the relationships we called friends. Owing to the experience one has, he/she forms different characteristics such as honest, loyal, humorous, clever and etc. If I have to choose the one to be my friend either clever or humorous, I would prefer the one who is clever, because in my opinion, the importance of having a clever friend exceeds that of a humorous friend.

Have clever friend is important because I can always learn something from a clever person. In this rapid developing world, everything changes quickly and I to keep my pace with the time. Unfortunately, I am occupied with so much stuff such as work and daily affairs that I don’t have too much time to care about what is happening outside. But when I got together with Tim, a very clever person, I was always told interesting things, happened or happening, that are useful and I learned a lot from him. Thank to Tim, sometimes I am called acquainted.

A clever friend can also help you figure things out when you are confused because of his/her intelligence. I still remember that I was hesitant about whether to attend a new opened textile exhibition which sponsored most of the fees for exhibitor. But I would have to pay more if I would not get some orders since it is not known by most of people. Tim analyzed the pros and cons elaborately for me, and I attended the exhibition finally and gained many order from there. In this case, you can’t count on a friend who is just humorous.

Furthermore, clever people could also be humorous, but people who are humorous are hard to be intelligent. It is admittedly that it is hard to improve one’s IQ that is something largely determined by your genes. Humorous, on the contrary, is a characteristic formed after birth. So if you have a intelligent friend, you may also have a humorous friend at the same time as long as he form sense of humor, and moreover, intelligent people always learn things fast. But if you have a humorous friend who is not clever, you will not expect him to be so.

For what has been discussed above, I can safely draw the conclusion that intellectual is really a more favorable characteristic than humorous. One will benefit more from an intelligent friend than from a humorous friend.

janicesaUID: 2686243

9.28.同意不同意：一个聪明的朋友比一个幽默的朋友重要
Human is an advanced animal that live in a community. （我觉得说这句话比较废话）No one is isolated in this world and （so）everyone must have some connections with others, one of the relationships we called friends.（friendship） Owing to（according to） the（an） experience（d）one has, he/she（human being） forms（has） different characteristics such as honest, loyal, humorous, clever and etc. If I have to choose the one to be my friend either clever or humorous, I would（去掉好些） prefer the（去掉the） one who is clever, because in my opinion, the importance of having a clever friend exceeds that of a humorous friend.

Have（Having a） clever friend is （more） important because I can always learn something （useful）from a clever person. In this rapid developing world, everything changes quickly and I （have）to keep my pace with the time. Unfortunately, I am occupied with so much stuff such as work and daily affairs that I don’t have too much time to care about what is happening outside. But when I got together with Tim, a very clever person, I was always told interesting things, happened or happening, that are useful and I learned a lot from him. Thank（s） to Tim, sometimes I am called acquainted.（例子可以在提炼，这样有点不清不楚的感觉，而且前面最好加上take me for example，分出文章的段落层次）

A clever friend can also help you（前面是i，这边变you了） figure things out when you are confused because of（用because of很奇怪） his/her intelligence. I still remember that I was hesitant about whether to attend a new opened textile exhibition which sponsored most of the fees for exhibitor. But I would have to pay more if I would not get some orders since it is not known by most of people. Tim analyzed the pros and cons elaborately for me, and I attended the exhibition finally and gained many order from there. In this case, you can’t count on a friend who is just humorous.

Furthermore, clever people could also be humorous, but people who are humorous are hard to be intelligent.（看到这个句子我很费解） It is admittedly that it is hard to improve one’s IQ that is something largely determined by your genes. Humorous, on the contrary, is a characteristic formed after birth. So if you have a intelligent friend, you may also have a humorous friend at the same time as long as he form sense of humor, and moreover, intelligent people always learn things fast. But if you have a humorous friend who is not clever, you will not expect him to be so.

For what has been discussed above, I can safely draw the conclusion that intellectual is really a more favorable characteristic than humorous. One will benefit more from an intelligent friend than from a humorous friend.

说实话，我也不擅长写作，我们一起加油吧～～

独眼豆豆UID: 2692023

9.29作业，花了40多分钟，比昨天好点吧。感觉思路没打开，措辞也不好。哎。
是应该放更多的钱在access internet 上，而不是public transportation 同意不同意
Along with the development of modern society, people’s lives are getting more comfortable due to the increasing number of available things that help to improve people's live, such as cars,  mobilephones, access to the internet and public trasportation. These things help to improve the quality of people’s lives in different degrees. Here comes the question, should more money be spent on the access to the internet or on the construction of public transportation? In my opinion, construction of public transportation is definitely must be the programe where the money should be spent.

More money should be spent on public transportation because it is the fundamental element in a society. If we take a glance at the evolvement of human history, it is not hard to find that people could realize the advanced facilities, one of which kinds is access to the internet, only when their bacis needs were meet. Compared with building the network of internet, public transportation is the underlying element of the society. Governments should spend more money on public transportation.

Also, owing to the numerous projects need to be worked on, the funds the government possesses are always insufficient, so these limited funds should always be spent on the program which needs to be improved mostly. Public transportation is exactly the item should be dealed with first. Imagine the picture, if more money is invested in the access to the internet but not the public transportatin, of one person sitting in the sofa enjoying the convenience the internet brings and at the same time many people are waiting for a bus under the hot sun, but the bus may already crowded with passengers. In this situation, how could a person say more money should be spent on internet?

Moreover, public transportation can be shared by all the citizens while the internet only fulfill some people’s need. It is not doubt that money should be spent on the place that benefits the most people. In sum, public transportation is in a superior place that needs the money than internet.

我是chineseladyUID: 2662783

Along with the development of modern society, people’s lives are getting more comfortable due to the increasing number of--可去掉 available things--facilities that help to improve people's live, such as cars,  mobilephones, access to the internet and public trasportation. These things help to improve the quality of people’s lives in different degrees. Here comes the question, should more money be spent on the access to the internet or on the construction of public transportation? In my opinion, construction of public transportation is definitely must be the programe where the money should be spent 开头貌似有点长

More money should be spent on public transportation because it is the fundamental element in a society. If we take a glance at the evolvement of human history, it is not hard to find that people could realize the advanced facilities, one of which kinds--one of those is access to the internet, only when were倒装 their bacis needs (were) meet. Compared with building--access the network of internet, public transportation is the underlying element of the society. Governments should spend more money on public transportation.

Also, owing to the numerous projects need to be worked on, the funds the government possesses are always insufficient, so these limited funds should always be spent on the program which needs to be improved mostly. Public transportation is exactly the item should be dealed with first. Imagine the picture, if more money is invested in the access to the internet but not the public transportatin, of one person sitting in the sofa enjoying the convenience the internet brings and at the same time many people are waiting for a bus under the hot sun, but the bus may already crowded with passengers:L  --it is not easy to catch up as it is long but still simple a sentence. In this situation, how could a person say more money should be spent on internet?: z& d6 e; t/ d0 ^9 c8 @4 }

Moreover, public transportation can be shared by all the citizens while the internet only fulfill some people’s need. It is not doubt that money should be spent on the place that benefits the most people. In sum, public ransportation is in a superior place that needs the money than internet. 结尾不错的,很简洁. 缺少举例.有些连句子不容易看懂.

ly8768UID: 2452066

3# 独眼豆豆

Along with the development of modern society, people’s lives are getting more comfortable due to the increasing number of available things that help to improve people's live, such as cars, mobilephones(mobilephones), access to the internet and public transportation. These things help to improve the quality of people’s lives in different degrees. Here comes the question, should more money be spent on the access to the internet or on the construction of public transportation? In my opinion, construction of public transportation is definitely must(is 和 must…重复了) be the programe(program) where the money should be spent.


More money should be spent on public transportation because it is the fundamental element in a society. If we take a glance at the evolvement of human history, it is not hard to find that people could realize the advanced facilities, one of which kinds is access to the internet(这里提到internet有什么意思？), only when their bacis(basic) needs were meet. Compared with building the network of internet, public transportation is the underlying element of the society. Governments should spend more money on public transportation.

这句说的evolvement of history 说的太大了啊

Also, owing to the numerous projects need(needed) to be worked on, the funds the government possesses are always insufficient, so these limited funds should always be spent on the program which needs to be improved mostly(最好开头就是topic sentence). Public transportation is exactly the item should be dealed(dealt) with first. Imagine the picture, if more money is invested in(on) the access to the internet but not the public transportation, of one person sitting in the sofa enjoying the convenience the internet brings and at the same time many people are waiting for a bus under the hot sun, but the bus may already crowded with passengers. In this situation, how could a person say more money should be spent on internet?

Moreover, public transportation can be shared by all the citizens while the internet only fulfill some people’s need. It is not doubt that money should be spent on the place that benefits the most people. In sum, public transportation is in a superior place that needs the money than internet.

逻辑还是不错的，语法问题要注意，还有有些句子太长了

fish1044UID: 2190500

补改你的9.28作业

    Human is an advanced animal that live in a community. No one is isolated in this world and everyone（有点累赘，前后半句一个意思） must have some connections with others, one of the relationships we called friends(is called friendship). Owing to the experience one has, he/she forms different characteristics such as honest, loyal, humorous, clever and etc. If I have to choose the one to be my friend either clever or humorous, I would prefer the one who is clever, because in my opinion, the importance of having a clever friend exceeds that of a humorous friend.

    Have(Having) clever friend is important because I can always learn something from a clever person. In this rapid developing world, everything changes quickly and I(少了个东西吧) to keep my pace with the time. Unfortunately, I am occupied with so much stuff such as work and daily affairs that I don’t have too much time to care about what is happening outside. But when I got together with Tim, a very clever person, I was always told interesting things, happened or happening, that are useful and I learned a lot from him. Thank to Tim, sometimes I am called acquainted.（知道的新闻多跟clever还是不太一样吧）" Z" X8 r7 L, P3 y2 k; j* J8 N1 M


A clever friend can also help you figure things out when you are confused because of（后面解释confused？） his/her intelligence. I still remember that I was hesitant about whether to attend a new opened textile exhibition which sponsored most of the fees for exhibitor. But I would have to pay more if I would not get some orders since it is not known by most of people. Tim analyzed the pros and cons elaborately for me, and I attended the exhibition finally and gained many order from there. In this case, you can’t count on a friend who is just humorous.（这段写得不错）
9 _! ]1 E0 u* I  I( ^

& ?- Z! f7 o/ W! I  K# ~3 V! S# d
    Furthermore, clever people could also be humorous, but people who are humorous are hard to be intelligent. It is admittedly that it is hard to improve one’s IQ that is something largely determined by your genes. Humorous, on the contrary, is a characteristic formed after birth. So if you have a intelligent friend, you may also have a humorous friend at the same time as long as he form sense of humor, and moreover, intelligent people always learn things fast. But if you have a humorous friend who is not clever, you will not expect him to be so.



For what has been discussed above, I can safely draw the conclusion that intellectual is really a more favorable characteristic than humorous. One will benefit more from an intelligent friend than from a humorous friend.（没有总结完上面的内容）

豆豆，功力很深厚啊。呵呵。