{Daily writing 作文特训小组} zhangbao0607的作文专栏，请各位修改指正！

zhangbao0607UID: 2943226

2011-7-28 独立写作作文贴
  时间：40分钟    字数：392

题目：Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?All high school students should take basic economic courses.



High school, an preparing period for the university, is necessary to take various kinds of courses, like the music course, physic course, geography course and so on. However, whether the students in high school should take the economic courses as the basic courses will become an issue. In terms of the development of the students, I agree that the students are supposed to take economic courses as basic courses in high school. That will benefit the students a lot in future.

At the first place, economic courses can help high school students prepare for the study in the university. As for the students who will take economic as their major in university, the basic economic courses can help them to build a foundation for economic. Some concept like the interest rate and exchange rate might be so strange to the one who never get to know the economic. We cannot deny that the students who have had the basic economic knowledge will feel much easier to handle the learning in university. Someone might feel confuse about the question that why students who will not take economic as their major also should take the basic economic courses in high school. The answer is obvious. No matter what you learn, you cannot escape from the economic knowledge, like the students who take food science as their major should also know how to figure out the money they will get after many years from the bank.

What's more, economic courses can also help the students build more friendship with others. When you talk with others, you will find that the ones who knowledgable can attract more person to talk with them. The economic topic become an essencial part in our daily life. By reading the newspaper, you can see how hot is the economic topic in the world. If the person want to become the one who knowledgable, you cannot learn without economic especially to the high school students who will become the powerful energy for the society.

The high school courses should set by the standard which represent the truth need not only for the students in the university but also for the whole society. Basic economic courses play an important role in the preparing for the university life . At the same time, they match the social need for the people to communicate.

wilsonchen2011UID: 3137568

你的作文改好了。希望对你有帮助。

zhangbao0607UID: 2943226

2011-7-28 独立写作作文贴
题目：Parents should allow children to make their own choices rather than help determine children's future.

As we all know that everyone has right to make choices whatever the race you are or the sex you are. Adults should make choices by themselves and take responsibility of their choices. Not only the adult, but also children should be allowed to make their own choices by their parents instead of being determined the direction for their future.

Making choices by children themselves do help to build the good relationship between the children and their parents. Children period, arguably, is an aggressive period of one’s whole life. Some parents give the whole schedule to their children without considering their children’s penchant. After doing that again and again, the children will get aggressive to their parents just in order to get more time to fulfill their truth interest. In that case, we can easily see children cry to their parents. What’s more, the relationship between parents and children will get worse and worse.

Making choices is a process helping children develop their analytical ability. Some parents like to arrange all for their children. In contrast, wise parents like to give some useful guidness to their children so that children can make right choices. When your child ask you which class should he or she take in holiday, what should parent answer? The wise one will help children to analyze what they real want and what they real interest even want to take it as their major in future. Eventually , the decision also be made by children themselves. Undoubtly, the process of making a decision can help children use their brain more and improve their analytical ability.
What’s more, if parents determine children’s future, that will effect the development of children’s life. It is not hardly to imagine that a child who hate to play piano but take piano course for 10 years because of his or her parents. After many years, this child become an adult and take piano as he or she major also due to their parents’ preference. Unless this child change the original idea on piano, he or she will be fed up with the piano and achieve nothing in his or her life.
In conclusion, parents should permit their children to choose what they really need and what they really prefer. Not only parents but also children should make their own choice. That will go far way many years ago.

ilhrxUID: 2759939

已阅

zhangbao0607UID: 2943226

2011-8-4 独立写作作文贴
题目：All school teachers should be required to take courses every five years to update their knowledge.


Updating knowledge, arguably, is necessary for everyone. Updating happen everyday in our lives, such as Internet, newspaper, television and so on. The information is updated everyday even every moment. In order to keep up the peace of the development around the world, not only the median but also the teachers should take courses every five years to refresh their knowledge.

Firstly, updating teachers' knowledge by taking courses every five year is a good chance to let teachers get together to communicate. Teachers teach students everyday so that they even have no time to communicate with other teachers because of the full class arrangement. I would like to talk about the updating courses in my school for teachers. My school separate the teachers into several group base on their major. The school also arrange the communication class for them. By attending these courses, these teachers can not only update their knowledge but also communicate with each other freely.

Secondly, to update teachers' knowledge also means to update students' knowledge. Teacher is a mirror of knowledge for student. If this mirror cannot reflect the advanced knowledge to students, what would happen? Lots of theories are not fast. They will change with the development of human being. When the teachers said that earth was round long time ago, students would acknowledge that is the truth. We cannot imagine if the knowlege could not be updated, some teachers also told their students that the earth is round . That will be a disaster to our education.

Admittedly, taking updating courses might take lots of money and time. However, to avoid teachers isolating from the advanced knowledge, we should spare no effort to let them attend these courses. Teachers can refresh their knowledge and refresh their information through these courses. Isolating from the advanced knowledge will let the significance of teachers fade. In other words, teachers who cannot absorb the latest knowledge will do harm to the development of education.

To sum up, world needs updating, people needs updating, education also needs updating. To take the courses every five years to update teachers knowledge is not only the need of teachers themselves but also the need for the whole education.

佳佳LOVE舞UID: 3050951

传不了附件我疯了……

佳佳LOVE舞UID: 3050951

Updating knowledge, arguably, is necessary for everyone. Updating happen everyday(every day y要分开来 合起来是形容词) in our lives, such as Internet, newspaper, television and so on. The information is updated everyday（同上） even every moment. In order to keep up the peace of the development around the world, not only the median but also the teachers should take courses every five years to refresh their knowledge.

Firstly, updating teachers' knowledge by taking courses every five year is a good chance to let teachers get together to communicate. Teachers teach students everyday so that they even have no time to communicate with other teachers because of the full class arrangement. I would like to talk about the updating courses in my school for teachers. My school separate（s） the teachers into several group base(d) on their major. The school(可以换成and 连成一句话) also arrange(s) the communication class for them. By attending these courses, these teachers can not only update their knowledge but also communicate with each other freely.

Secondly, to update teachers' knowledge also means to update students' knowledge. Teacher is a mirror of knowledge for student. If this mirror cannot reflect the advanced knowledge to students, what would happen? Lots of theories are not fast（这句话：“很多理论不快” 这个表达的是啥？和后面内容也没联系哇 可以换成cannot last very long 之类的~）. They will change with the development of human being. When the teachers said that earth was round long time ago, students would acknowledge that is（was） the truth. We cannot imagine if the knowledge could not be updated, some teachers also(是虚拟语气吗 你用了could not,如果是的话加个would) （换成still 更好~）told(tell) their students that the earth is round . That will be a disaster to our education.

Admittedly, taking updating courses might take(s) lots of money and time. However, to avoid teachers isolating from the advanced knowledge, we should spare no effort to let them attend these courses. Teachers can refresh their knowledge and refresh(refresh不用两遍啦~直接删掉就好) their information through these courses. Isolating from the advanced knowledge will let the significance of teachers fade. In other words, teachers who cannot absorb the latest knowledge will do harm to the development of education.

To sum up, world needs updating, people needs updating, （and来连接最后两个并列） education also needs updating. To take the courses every five years to update teachers(’) knowledge is not only the need of teachers themselves but also the need for(of) the whole education.

julijoneUID: 2843727

0804独立改好了
不错 加油

zhangbao0607UID: 2943226

2011-8-4 独立写作作文贴(修改版）
题目：All school teachers should be required to take courses every five years to update their knowledge.
以下是8月4日独立作文修改后的版本，经过各位大虾的指点后，我果断总结自己写作的不足有以下几点：1.用词很累赘，明明用一个and可以搞定的事情，我就分成了两句；2.比喻不恰当，给人感觉无厘头；3.用词匮乏，语句的变化缺乏；4.没有及时运用当天所学的词句。

Updating knowledge, arguably, is necessary for everyone. Updating happen every day in our lives, such as Internet, newspaper, television and so on. The information is updated every day even every moment. In order to keep pace with the development around the world, not only the media but also the teachers should take courses every five years to refresh their knowledge.

Firstly, updating teachers' knowledge by taking courses every five year is a good chance to let teachers get together to communicate. Teachers teach students everyday so that they even have no time to communicate with each other because of the full class arrangement. I would like to talk about the updating courses in my school for teachers. My school seperates the teachers into several group according to their major. The school also arranges the communication class. By attending these courses, these teachers can not only update their knowledge but also communicate with each other freely.

Secondly, to update teachers' knowledge also means to update students' knowledge. Teacher palys a pivotal role in the education. If they cannot reflect the advanced knowledge to students, what would happen? Lots of theories are not craved in stone.They will change with the development of techology. When the teachers said that earth was round long time ago, students would acknowledge that is the truth. We cannot imagine if the knowlege could not be updated, some teachers also delever the same theory to their students . That will be a disaster to our education.

Admittedly, taking updating courses might take lots of money and time. However, to avoid teachers isolating from the advanced knowledge, we should spare no effort to let them attend these courses. Teachers can refresh their knowledge and their information through these courses. Isolating from the advanced knowledge will overshadow the significance of teachers. In other words, teachers who cannot absorb the latest knowledge will do harm to the development of education.

To sum up, world needs updating, people needs updating, education also needs updating. To take the courses every five years to update teachers knowledge is not only the need of teachers themselves but also the need for the whole education.

zhangbao0607UID: 2943226

8月26日独立写作
题目：Do you agree or disagree with the followingstatement? The advice from the grandparents is of no use to their grandchildrenbecause the world has changed a lot over the past 50 years

The old, necessary part of every family, are play pivotal role in every family. Some people might say that the old cannot keep pace with the development of the society because the world develop so rapid over 50 years. In my perspective, I disagree that the old like the grandparents are no use for people today.

There is no better way to work more effective than to draw on the experence of the old. Old people like grandparents are mirror to reflect the past. Not only reflect the success of the past, but also reflect the failure of the past. Through these success and failure experence we can see the situatition clearly. The past experence tell us lots about what we should do and what we should not do. We can move the barrier for the development today by taking advice from the old.

Generally speaking, it is the old bring the tradition from the past to us. We cannot imagine if there are no any tradition today. How can ethnic group link its people together. If there is no spring festival in China, it is a disaster for China. People will become seperated. What's more, people have no idea how to celebrate these festivals without the suggestion of the old. Undoubtly, countries cannot live without tradition. In other word, countries cannot exisit without the deliver of tradition by the old.

Admittedly, world develop rapidly and people's mind change greatly, the old seem to be no use any more. Although the old cannot operate the state-of- the- art machine like the computers or mobile phones, they can give valuable advice from within which can truthly give you direction.

To sum up, we cannot ignore the valuale of the old people. No matter how the world change, the old can also truthly give you the most valuable advice.

zhangbao0607UID: 2943226

8月26日综合写作

The lecture put forward a few idea about the team work in a company, The presenter thinks the group work cannot be the best method to fulfill certain projects which contradict to the passage. The passage approve the group work as the best way to achieve programs.

Fistly, the lecture states that the members in the team will sometimes pay less afford to the certain projects. Because when the programs finish, the company give the credit for all their team instead of honnoring the individual who contributes more during the program. That contradicts the idea which put forward in the passage.

Secondly, the professor thinks that it will take lots of time to achieve the agreement. Manying meetings will be held to discuss the programs. That will slow down the progress of the projects. In contrary, the passage states that the group work will be more quickly because of the greater resources of group members.

Thirdly, in the lecture, the speaker illustrates that sometimes the group work will not lead the sense of statisfaction to the team member. Because one or two members in the group take the idea as an creative idea, the other in the group might ignore the idea. Eventually, the projects fail, companies will put this blame on all the members in this group.

The views in the passage undoubtly totally are jeapadized by  the professor in the lecture.

julijoneUID: 2843727

加油 欢迎回改

zhangbao0607UID: 2943226

8月13日 题目：Do you agree or disagree: Improving school is the most important factor for developing of a country.

Schools,argubly,play pivotal role in acountry. Schools cultivate hunge amount of talents and versitiles for a country. There is no doubt that I agree the view that by improving school is the most important factor for developing a country. I have three reasons to support my opinion.

Firstly,schools equip students ability to prepare for their university life in the future. There is no doubt that the university graduates are major power for the development of country. We learn to read, we learn to write, we also learn to sing in schools. Not only the teachers in schools motivate us to learn, but also the facilities in schools let us become well-being person. By imporving shcool not only the teaching quality but also the facilities can give a better environment to the students to cultivate their imagination and passion. After many years, these students will enter universities and learn more quickly because of the good school education. We can easily predict these students will become the motivation to countries' development.

What is more, school can not only deliver knowledge to the youth but also the old so that schools can lead coordination to the whole country. We can remmember that 100 years ago, China is very disorder because there is no good education system. People around this country become rude. In contrast, people today are more likely to be gentle and mild because they get good edcation. So counties become more and more harmony.

Admittedly, not all the people should go to school, so schools are not as important as it seems. However, just a few people can depend on their talent to achieve their value by themselves, most of people need the schools' help.Development of country need more people to devote themselves. If there are no the outstanding member in the microsofe company, how Bill's company run so distinguish?

To sum up, improving schools is not just the need of every students but also the whole country. It is the most important thing fo developing countries.

callmecUID: 3150809

8月13日(修改贴） 题目：Do you agree or disagree: Improving school is the most important factor for developing of a country.

Schools,argubly,play pivotal role in acountry. Schools cultivate hunge amount of talents and versitiles for a country. There is no doubt that I agree the view that by(两个that有点重复，把I AGREE THE VIEW可以去掉，另外BY应该去掉，这个语法错误比较大) improving school is the most important factor for developing a country. I have three reasons to support my opinion.

Firstly,schools equip students ability to prepare for their university life in the future. There is no doubt that the university graduates are major power for the development of country. We learn to read, we learn to write, we also learn to sing in schools. Not only the teachers in schools motivate us to learn, but also the facilities in schools let us become well-being person.（老师激励我们学习？学校设施让我们幸福？有点欠妥吧……我的理解是motivation更大程度上是一个源于内在的激励，别人激励自己也是有这种用法，但是老师激励我们学习似乎有点不如instruct合理……好吧 ，我纠结于细节了。第二个不如改成：好的设施让我们拥有更好的学习环境，然后是幸福的？跟后文也不矛盾……另外，你后文的NOT ONLY BUT ALSO重复多余了，不如直接换成teaching quality and facilities） By imporving shcool not only the teaching quality but also the facilities can give a better environment to the students to cultivate their imagination and passion. After many years, these students will enter universities and learn more quickly because of the good school education. We can easily predict these students will become the motivation to countries' development.

What is more, school can not only deliver knowledge to the youth but also the old so that schools can lead coordination to the whole country. We can remmember that 100 years ago, China is very disorder because there is no good education system. People around this country become rude. In contrast, people today are more likely to be gentle and mild because they get good edcation. So counties become more and more harmony（额 说个题外话，你写这段的时候脸上可有诡异的笑容？另外，harmony是名词，改为harmonious）.
Admittedly, not all the people should go to school, so schools are not as important as it seems. However, just a few people can depend on their talent to achieve their value by themselves, most of people need the schools' help.Development of（缺定冠词a） country need more people to devote themselves. If there are no the outstanding member in the microsofe company, how Bill's company run so distinguish? （Microsoft ,members,注意单复数，前文也有类似问题）

To sum up, improving schools is not just the need of every students but also the whole country. It is the most important thing fo developing countries.

zhangbao0607UID: 2943226

8月15日 题目Do you agree or disagree with the following statement: The effective leader tries to make others feel they have been part of a decision.

Every leader has his or her own concept to lead a team. There is no doubt that a good and effective leader is very important for a team. Among all kinds of leader, I regard the ones who let others feel they have been part of a decision as the most effective leader. I have three resons to support my opinion.

Firstly, effective leaders always try to let most of the members in the team to put forward their opinion. Generally speaking, every person has his or her own character, different people will hold different views on the same thing. To accumulate the suggestions from lots of people can let the leader see the situation more clearly no matter how bad the suggestions are. By motivating team members to join the discussion or put up their perspectives, that will not only give the sense of belonging to the members but also let the leader solve the problems more effectively and throughly.

Secondly, by giving the honor or sense of failure to all the members in the teams can let the members feel they are part of the decision. That also a best way to improve the consolidation of  team. When you see your boss recepect all the credit himself or herself after finishing the project, what do you think then? There might be some motion like what can I get after the success. We can easily imagine that other members who also join the project have the same negative view on their boss. Again and again, the negative motion accumulates so that the workteam will go to separated way. At that time, there will have no chance for the leader to become an effective leader.

Admittedly, some people might think that let others feel the sense of belongs on the decision sometimes might delay the project or slow down the speed of the process. However, if the leader always be a detractor, the failure might often occurs. We can imagine that you are the leader in a team, you always make the decision by yourself , someone will ask why do you build up this team? In the history, there are also lots of examples about the solitary work causing failure.

To sum up, to become an effective leader, you should learn how to let others in your team put forward their idea and give not only the sense of failure but also the honor to them. When all the members become parts of the decision, the effective leader appears.