3月3日作文

swbaiUID: 2600532

3.3：Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Some people think children should study and play, other people think children should help with household chores.
Someone says that men are created to survive from their environment. Our brains are the most powerful weapon in the whole world. We use our brains more efficiently than any other animal. Human, especially for children, have a lot of potential ability when they are focused to do something. For athlete who gets the top of the list, they spend more time on their subject than any one else. But for things they never heard about or just have a little contact, they can barely do it well. If you want a journalist to do some sport, he/she may do it poorly compared with professional athletes.
What we want children to be is easy to imagine. He/she should be intelligent, smart, and do the entire thing he/she could. Moreover, he/she must have the ability to earn a living. What will children do if he/she is only told to do household chores? Of course he/she can do household chores best, but no one could possibility think he/she can do other job as well as household chores.
The main reason we want children study is, study can make a basic understanding of the whole world. Children are quit eagle to know the world, but from the beginning, they know little about it. They can learn from book, television, and internet. They also get a lot of knowledge from learning. Additionally, they can also get some ability from study, which is the key for their survival in the modern world. For example, basic counting is essential for kids. People can not always get computer in somewhere nearby. Playing is another way to strengthen children's ability. During playing, children's muscular are strengthening; and they can also get quick response.
In a word, children should spend most of time study and play, thus they can have a better future. Do household chores can only help them little.

爱烤鱼的小伙UID: 2580692

3.3：Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Some people think children should study and play, other people think children should help with household chores.. p  ^6 e: L( h8 G' D
Someone says that men are created to survive from their environment. Our brains are the most powerful weapon in the whole world. We use our brains more efficiently than any other animal. Human, especially for children, have a lot of potential ability when they are focused to do something. For athlete who gets the top of the list, they spend more time on their subject than any one else. But for things they never heard about or just have a little contact, they can barely do it well. If you want a journalist to do some sport, he/she may do it poorly compared with professional athletes.
What we want children to be is easy to imagine. He/she should be intelligent, smart, and do the entire thing he/she could. Moreover, he/she must have the ability to earn a living. What will children do if he/she is only told to do household chores? Of course he/she can do household chores best, but no one could possibility think he/she can do other job as well as household chores.
The main reason we want children study is, study can make a basic understanding of the whole world. Children are quit eagle（quite eager） to know the world, but from the beginning, they know little about it. They can learn from book, television, and internet. They also get a lot of knowledge from learning.(这句话表达有点问题，逻辑好像不清晰) Additionally, they can also get some ability from study, which is the key for their survival in the modern world. For example, basic counting is essential for kids. People can not always get computer in somewhere nearby. Playing is another way to strengthen children's ability. During playing, children's muscular are strengthening（being strengthened）; and they can also get quick response.
In a word, children should spend most of time study and play, thus they can have a better future. Do household chores can only help them little.
文章语言很流利，不过感觉整篇文章的逻辑思维并不是很严密，第二段论述的作用不清晰，第三段语言不够简洁，举的例子典型性不够突出。另外就是开头段太长而结尾段太短，该点题的地方点的还不够。建议楼主在论点的提出和展开上再多花点心思。

Uranus1989UID: 2756616

万分对不住了，我今天12点之前恐怕改不完了，明天10点之前一定给你改完，万分抱歉了，主要一到晚上就熄灯，笔记本又支持不了多久

Uranus1989UID: 2756616

3.3：Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Some peoplethink children should study and play, other people think childrenshould help with household chores.; V# g: h; e( F, e+ S0 Y; m
Someone says that men are created to survive from their environment.Our brains are the most powerful weapon in the whole world. We use ourbrains more efficiently than any other animal. Human, especially forchildren, have a lot of potential ability when they are focused to dosomething. For athlete who gets the top of the list, they spend moretime on their subject(这个好像没有那个意思,major sports如何) than any one else. But for things they neverheard about or just have a little contact with, they can barely do it well.If you want a journalist to do some sport, he/she may do it poorlycompared with professional athletes.& O+ O0 d. R$ t4 p
What we want children to be is easy to imagine. He/she should beintelligent, smart, and do the entire(as many as) thing he/she could. Moreover,he/she must have the ability to earn a living. What will children do ifhe/she is only told to do household chores? Of course he/she can dohousehold chores best, but no one could possibility think he/she can doother job as well as household chores.
% u6 V6 D3 x, S7 N* r) x! R# HThemain reason we want children study is, study can make a basicunderstanding of the whole world. Children are quit eagle(quite eager) to know theworld, but from the beginning, they know little about it. They canlearn from book, television, and internet. They also get a lot ofknowledge from learning. Additionally, they can also get some abilityfrom study, which is the key for their survival in the modern world.For example, basic counting is essential for kids. People can notalways get computer in somewhere nearby. Playing is another way tostrengthen children's ability. During playing, children's muscular arestrengthening; and they can also get quick response.; [, \5 y  }3 }# z9 g7 f7 p- ^
In a word, children should spend most of time study and play, thus theycan have a better future. Do household chores can only help them little.
对不起啊，今天给你看的迟了好多。
我觉得你今天的文章要比昨天通顺很多，而且用法也多了很多变化，这是很好的地方。
但是有个问题，我觉得你还是进入主题太慢了啊都到了倒数第二段才进入主题。因为我看到你好像不喜欢按照模板写作的文章，所以其实我也有点不确定了，这样的写法是因为你不在按照模板写作，还是你没有一个很明确的中心，你的第二三段跟中心的联系让我觉得很小啊，这种联系很小的铺垫段应该尽量缩小啊。但是如果你是不在按照模板写作，有自己的一套思路的话，我们可以继续探讨，因为我觉得你也不是一篇文章是这样了，可能你自己也有自己的想法，所以我们可以继续讨论。