Issue6 同主题 第6篇 A ZA A ZA 期待你的拍拍

pciciUID: 210908

Issue6  第6篇  A ZA A ZA
------摘要------
作者：Pcici     共用时间：49分42秒     504 words(572)
从2005年6月13日12时1分到2005年6月13日12时49分
------题目------
The most effective way to understand contemporary culture is to analyze the trends of its youth.
------正文------2次修改
Should the youth be the main body in the research of the contemporary culture?  As culture becomes a popular key word in the modern society, people place more and more emphasis on the examination of contemporary culture.  The youth is the future of the society and the most active force of the world, and thus anyone may claim that the youth is the central impacting factor in the contemporary culture.  Yet, to concern the culture's development and constituent, to just analyze the youth may be not on the effective way to the research of modern culture.  

Admittedly, the youth is the future of the world, and thus they make contribution to the shaping process of the future culture. Consequently, the youth may be the most effective keystone for understanding the trends of contemporary.  Because of the often exchange of the people, especially the youth, they are prone to accept and adore the foreign culture.  As a result, the Macdonald's and KFC, coca cola and Pepsi spread all over the world to shaping an instant-food culture.  Young people's activities to exchange and mangle together creates an atmosphere for the whole society to form a harmonious family of all. And the culture in future will be more multiple and abundant.  So it is reasonable to claim the youth as the decisive force of the tendency of the modern culture and should be regarded as the effective research object towards that direction.  

However, to simply put, taking contemporary culture as a temporary phenomenon is superficial and naive, since that the development of culture is an accumulating and persisting process.  To discrete, the word, "contemporary" differs from "current", in that when "contemporary" is placed before culture, it means a century time for generations succeeding, while current just means a flash of time and a temporary state.  Also, culture differs from prevalence. To mention prevalence, it is inevitable to refer to blue jeans, a significant garment of the 1960s and 1970s, and a creation by Levis' company in 1873 and still a prevailing fashion dressing nowadays.  Jeans' long popularity traversed two centuries, forming an example to address that culture is an accumulation after prevalence.  This example rules out the culture from the prevalence since that culture is the accumulation of current prevalence through long time struggling to be mature into a systematical theory.  

Moreover, culture infiltrates into all facets of our life, which the youth roles in part of the forms in, not the whole. Referring in the last paragraph that culture needs accumulation, the old and the prime of life should be the research emphasis of utter importance.  Take the literature and art, two weighty parts of the culture focusing on human psychological life, for example.  The mature ones, for their abundant life experience and life long training, are the deicide forces in the realms of literature and art, shaping the traits of the culture in these two areas and impart the kernel to the succeeding young people.  For example, the world top three tenors are all no longer young, but they are still the representative of the field of vocality.  In sum, the mature ones regardless old or midlife should be taken into the research as a determinant power and the mainstream on modern culture for the succeeding generations inherit their creation to develop.  

In conclusion, the youth must be the research emphasis of the trend of contemporary culture, but not the whole.  Nevertheless, the old cannot be ignored for their contribution to shaping the characteristics of contemporary modern.  And all these discussion is based on the culture's persistence and accumulation effects.

[ Last edited by pcici on 2005-7-16 at 13:31 ]

pciciUID: 210908

position:not agree.由于文化的积累效应和连续性以及多种组成，年轻人只是其中一部分，光研究他们不能做到effective，而老年人恰恰是对当代文化起重要影响作用的一部分，不能忽视。诚然，年轻人作为世界的未来，对当代文化的发展趋势有重要影响。

1。文化的积累效应和延续性。
2。老年人在文化组成中的举足轻重的作用以及他们对当代文化形成的影响。
3。年轻人是当代文化发展的未来力量，对研究当代文化的前进趋势至关重要。

vprzhsUID: 144409

up。。提纲不错。。帮你看看

vprzhsUID: 144409

Should the youth be the main body in the research of the contemporary culture?  As(as表示原因么？此句何解？是说由于文化的重要性加大而人们原来越注意了？表述方式是否有问题？) culture becomes a popular key word in the modern society, people place more and more emphasis on the examination of contemporary culture.  The youth is the future(年轻人是未来？？应该是社会的未来吧？ Future of the society) and the most powerful force of the world, and thus anyone may claim that it is the central impacting factors(该是单数吧？factor) in the contemporary culture.  Yet, to concern the culture's development and constitute(文化构成？是这样表述么？), to analyze the youth may not by(by在这里是干什么啊？这句不懂。是be么？) the effective way to the research of modern culture.  

To simply put, taking contemporary culture as a temporary phenomenon is hasty and naive, since that the development of culture is an accumulating and persisting process.  To discrete, the word, "contemporary" differs from "current", in that when "contemporary" is placed before culture, it means a century time for generations succeeding.  Also, culture differs from prevalence. To mention prevalence, it is inevitable to refer to blue jeans, a significant garment of the 1960s and 1970s, and a creation by Levis' company in 1873 and still a prevailing fashion dressing nowadays.  Jeans' long popularity crossed two centuries, forming an example to address that culture is an accumulation after prevalence.  (讲当代文化不仅仅是当代的现象，历史时延续性的。这段应该还可以再写一些的。你说的是一个事件发生对多个时期的影响吧？)

Moreover, culture consists of human shared values, thoughts, living style, food and cuisine, consumerism, recreation, education and social patterns. (这句话跟这段论述中心有啥干系？放在开头觉得不妥！或者放后面，或者去掉。)The youth is part of these forms of culture but not the whole, while referring in the last paragraph that culture needs accumulation, the old (觉得好像不顺,the old ones)may be a research emphasis of utter importance.  Take the literature and art, two weighing parts of the culture focusing in human psychological life, for example.  The old, for their abundant life experience and life long training, are the deicide forces in the realm of literature and art, shaping the traits of the culture in these two areas, (由于社会经验丰富，多年教育，就塑造了文学与艺术的特征？是否该有些例子啊？你说是就是啦？)although the youth may be muscular and creative while the old may be weak and ephemeral.  In analogy, the youth is the sunrise in the morning while the old is the sunset in the dawn. However, the old use to be the youth in the past to decide the developing of the contemporary now.  In sum, the old should be taken into the research as a decisive power on modern culture for the succeeding generations inherit their creation to develop.  (这段说由于文化连续性，老年人也该成为研究重点。年轻人不是全部。)(年纪的增长带来的是社会经验的丰富以及对一些社会问题的思考的深入，如果说到老年人对当代文化的影响，那至少要说一下具体的发挥作用，事实上年轻人很多最初的想法都是从长辈身上得来的阿，否则一开始谁教育他们啊？难道大家都生而知之？都成圣人拉，教育机构都要倒闭了。是否该从这方面想想呢？)

Admittedly, the youth is the future of the world, and thus they make contribution to the shaping process of the future culture. Consequently, (to research )the youth may be the most effective way to understanding the trends of contemporary(个人觉得不定式做主语的句式是否太滥了).  Because of the often exchange of the people, especially the youth, they are prone to accept and adore the foreign culture.  As a result, the Macdonald's and KFC, coca cola and Pepsi spread all over the world to shaping a fast-food culture.  Young people's activities to exchange and mangle together creates an atmosphere for the whole society to form a harmonious family of all. And the culture in future will be more multiple and abundant.  So it is reasonable to claim the youth as the decisive force of the tendency of the modern culture and should be greeted as the effective research part towards that direction.  

In conclusion, the youth must be the research emphasis of the trend of contemporary culture, but not the whole.  Nevertheless, the old cannot be ignored for their contribution to shaping the characteristics of contemporary modern.  And all these discussion is based on the culture's persistence and accumulation effects.

从思考角度上探讨了一下。如有得罪。。望见谅。

[ Last edited by vprzhs on 2005-7-13 at 22:05 ]

vprzhsUID: 144409

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... &extra=page%3D1

我的帖子。。望多指教指教

pciciUID: 210908

连接没有做好，先默认是吧，回头先给你改了，再自己改，：）

pciciUID: 210908

Should the youth be the main body in the research of the contemporary culture?  As表示随着 culture becomes a popular key word in the modern society, people place more and more emphasis on the examination of contemporary culture.  The youth is the future of the society and the most powerful force of the world, and thus anyone may claim that it is the central impacting factor in the contemporary culture.  Yet, to concern the culture's development and constitutes, to analyze the youth may be not on the effective way to the research of modern culture.  

To simply put, taking contemporary culture as a temporary phenomenon is hasty and naive, since that the development of culture is an accumulating and persisting process.  To discrete, the word, "contemporary" differs from "current", in that when "contemporary" is placed before culture, it means a century time for generations succeeding.  Also, culture differs from prevalence. To mention prevalence, it is inevitable to refer to blue jeans, a significant garment of the 1960s and 1970s, and a creation by Levis' company in 1873 and still a prevailing fashion dressing nowadays.  Jeans' long popularity crossed two centuries, forming an example to address that culture is an accumulation after prevalence.  

Moreover, culture infiltrates into all facets of our life, which the youth roles in part of the forms in, not the whole. Referring in the last paragraph that culture needs accumulation, the old should be a research emphasis of utter importance.  Take the literature and art, two weighty parts of the culture focusing in human psychological life, for example.  The old, for their abundant life experience and life long training, are the deicide forces in the realms of literature and art, shaping the traits of the culture in these two areas and impart the kernel to the succeeding young people.  For example, the world top three tenors are all no longer young, but they are still the representative of the field of vocality.  Although the youth may be muscular and creative while the old may be weak and ephemeral.  In analogy, the youth is the sunrise in the morning while the old is the sunset in the dawn. However, the old use to be the youth in the past to decide the developing of the contemporary now.  In sum, the old should be taken into the research as a decisive power on modern culture for the succeeding generations inherit their creation to develop.  

Admittedly, the youth is the future of the world, and thus they make contribution to the shaping process of the future culture. Consequently, the youth may be the most effective keystone for understanding the trends of contemporary.  Because of the often exchange of the people, especially the youth, they are prone to accept and adore the foreign culture.  As a result, the Macdonald's and KFC, coca cola and Pepsi spread all over the world to shaping a fast-food culture.  Young people's activities to exchange and mangle together creates an atmosphere for the whole society to form a harmonious family of all. And the culture in future will be more multiple and abundant.  So it is reasonable to claim the youth as the decisive force of the tendency of the modern culture and should be regarded as the effective research object towards that direction.  

In conclusion, the youth must be the research emphasis of the trend of contemporary culture, but not the whole.  Nevertheless, the old cannot be ignored for their contribution to shaping the characteristics of contemporary modern.  And all these discussion is based on the culture's persistence and accumulation effects.

frontelfleeUID: 208618

占座，晚你两天考，帮你拍第三次。

frontelfleeUID: 208618

Issue6 Revision  第6篇  A ZA A ZA   pcici
------摘要------
作者：Pcici     共用时间：49分42秒     504 words(572)
从2005年6月13日12时1分到2005年6月13日12时49分
------题目------
The most effective way to understand contemporary culture is to analyze the trends of its youth.
------提纲------
position:not agree.由于文化的积累效应和连续性以及多种组成，年轻人只是其中一部分，光研究他们不能做到effective，而老年人恰恰是对当代文化起重要影响作用的一部分，不能忽视。诚然，年轻人作为世界的未来，对当代文化的发展趋势有重要影响。
1。文化的积累效应和延续性。
2。老年人在文化组成中的举足轻重的作用以及他们对当代文化形成的影响。
3。年轻人是当代文化发展的未来力量，对研究当代文化的前进趋势至关重要。
{你的全文TS让人觉得是想7分给老年人，3分给青年人。
　并且划分不全，除了老年人还有中年人，这些才是文化主力；不管在学术方面，还是艺术方面。
}



------正文------
Should the youth be the main body in the research of the contemporary culture?  As culture becomes a popular key word in the modern society, people place more and more emphasis on the examination of contemporary culture.  The youth is the future of the society and the most powerful{powerful 改为active是否较确切？} force of the world, and thus anyone may claim that it is the central impacting factor in the contemporary culture.  Yet, to concern the culture's development and constitutes, to analyze the youth may be not on the effective way to the research of modern culture.
{背景+观点，部分不同意。你的全文TS没有很好的概括你想说的}  

To simply put, taking contemporary culture as a temporary phenomenon is hasty and naive, since that the development of culture is an accumulating and persisting process.  To discrete, the word, "contemporary" differs from "current", in that when "contemporary" is placed before culture, it means a century time for generations succeeding.  Also, culture differs from prevalence. To mention prevalence, it is inevitable to refer to blue jeans, a significant garment of the 1960s and 1970s, and a creation by Levis' company in 1873 and still a prevailing fashion dressing nowadays.  Jeans' long popularity crossed two centuries, forming an example to address that culture is an accumulation after prevalence.
{觉得你的这段好像展开得不够充分。
　contemporary current的区别是什么？culture跟prevalence的区别又是什么？　
}

Moreover, culture infiltrates into all facets of our life, which the youth roles in part of the forms in, not the whole. Referring in the last paragraph that culture needs accumulation, the old should be a research emphasis of utter importance.  Take the literature and art, two weighty parts of the culture focusing in human psychological life, for example.  The old, for their abundant life experience and life long training, are the deicide forces in the realms of literature and art, shaping the traits of the culture in these two areas and impart the kernel to the succeeding young people.  For example, the world top three tenors are all no longer young, but they are still the representative of the field of vocality.  Althoughthe youth may be muscular and creative while the old may be weak and ephemeral.  In analogy, the youth is the sunrise in the morning while the old is the sunset in the dawn. However, {段内最好不要用however这类大转折词}the old use to be the youth in the past to decide the developing of the contemporary now.  In sum, the old should be taken into the research as a decisive power on modern culture for the succeeding generations inherit their creation to develop.  
{你的第一句不像是TS。
}


Admittedly, the youth is the future of the world, and thus they make contribution to the shaping process of the future culture. Consequently, the youth may be the most effective keystone for understanding the trends of contemporary.  Because of the often exchange of the people, especially the youth, they are prone to accept and adore the foreign culture.  As a result, the Macdonald's and KFC, coca cola and Pepsi spread all over the world to shaping a fast-food culture.  Young people's activities to exchange and mangle together creates an atmosphere for the whole society to form a harmonious family of all. And the culture in future will be more multiple and abundant.  So it is reasonable to claim the youth as the decisive force of the tendency of the modern culture and {增the youth?}should be regarded as the effective research object towards that direction.  

In conclusion, the youth must be the research emphasis of the trend of contemporary culture, but not the whole.  Nevertheless, the old cannot be ignored for their contribution to shaping the characteristics of contemporary modern.  And all these discussion is based on the culture's persistence and accumulation effects.
{
你的提纲与文章结构都在说明the old比the young重要。
但你的前两个Body不够强悍，让步太喧兵夺主了。结尾强调的也是年青人的作用较大。很不一致啊
}

frontelfleeUID: 208618

为什么颜色上不去？

pciciUID: 210908

0_o~我觉得the young对面就是the old 不然怎么分成两类好？

你帮我拍三篇，我也帮你拍三篇
待会再根据你说的自改一遍

pciciUID: 210908

Should the youth be the main body in the research of the contemporary culture?  As表示随着 culture becomes a popular key word in the modern society, people place more and more emphasis on the examination of contemporary culture.  The youth is the future of the society and the most active force of the world, and thus anyone may claim that the youth is the central impacting factor in the contemporary culture.  Yet, to concern the culture's development and constituent, to just analyze the youth may be not on the effective way to the research of modern culture.  

Admittedly, the youth is the future of the world, and thus they make contribution to the shaping process of the future culture. Consequently, the youth may be the most effective keystone for understanding the trends of contemporary.  Because of the often exchange of the people, especially the youth, they are prone to accept and adore the foreign culture.  As a result, the Macdonald's and KFC, coca cola and Pepsi spread all over the world to shaping an instant-food culture.  Young people's activities to exchange and mangle together creates an atmosphere for the whole society to form a harmonious family of all. And the culture in future will be more multiple and abundant.  So it is reasonable to claim the youth as the decisive force of the tendency of the modern culture and should be regarded as the effective research object towards that direction.  

However, to simply put, taking contemporary culture as a temporary phenomenon is superficial and naive, since that the development of culture is an accumulating and persisting process.  To discrete, the word, "contemporary" differs from "current", in that when "contemporary" is placed before culture, it means a century time for generations succeeding, while current just means a flash of time and a temporary state.  Also, culture differs from prevalence. To mention prevalence, it is inevitable to refer to blue jeans, a significant garment of the 1960s and 1970s, and a creation by Levis' company in 1873 and still a prevailing fashion dressing nowadays.  Jeans' long popularity traversed two centuries, forming an example to address that culture is an accumulation after prevalence.  This example rules out the culture from the prevalence since that culture is the accumulation of current prevalence through long time struggling to be mature into a systematical theory.  

Moreover, culture infiltrates into all facets of our life, which the youth roles in part of the forms in, not the whole. Referring in the last paragraph that culture needs accumulation, the old and the prime of life should be the research emphasis of utter importance.  Take the literature and art, two weighty parts of the culture focusing on human psychological life, for example.  The mature ones, for their abundant life experience and life long training, are the deicide forces in the realms of literature and art, shaping the traits of the culture in these two areas and impart the kernel to the succeeding young people.  For example, the world top three tenors are all no longer young, but they are still the representative of the field of vocality.  In sum, the mature ones regardless old or midlife should be taken into the research as a determinant power and the mainstream on modern culture for the succeeding generations inherit their creation to develop.  

In conclusion, the youth must be the research emphasis of the trend of contemporary culture, but not the whole.  Nevertheless, the old cannot be ignored for their contribution to shaping the characteristics of contemporary modern.  And all these discussion is based on the culture's persistence and accumulation effects.