issue10 期待互拍

chengenhuiUID: 200271

Issue10  第8篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧！
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作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：43分49秒     565 words
从2005年6月24日10时42分到2005年6月24日11时43分
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Governments must ensure that their major cities receive the financial support they need in order to thrive, because it is primarily in cities that a nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated.
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The author asserts that major cities should receive the financial support from the government for their development, since the nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated in these major cities. In my point of view, I partly agree with the author's opinion that is the major cities play a crucial role in preserving and generating the nation's cultural traditions; meanwhile, we also should not neglect to protect the culture preserved in remote areas.

In the first place, the major cities play a considerable part in persevering and generating the tradition culture of a nation. Thorough many famous city, such as Pairs of France, London of Britain, Cairo of Egypt and Beijing of China, we can understand the characteristic of the whole nation. There are many famous resorts and culture relic in these cities, such as the Big Ben in London, the Summer Palace in Beijing and the Pyramid in Egypt. Visitors expected to understand the culture of whole nations thorough the witness of these famous resorts and culture relics. However, the fee of maintenance and protect these resorts are quite high, only relying on the income of travelers far from enough. Since the government have the reasonability to preserve the traditional culture, it must take amount of money for the major cities to thrive, so that they can preserve and generate the cultural traditions.

In the second place, when we focus on the development of the major cities, we also should not neglect the cultural tradition in the remote areas. These cultural traditions are also one parts of the whole nation cultural traditions. Since the inconvenience traffic, the remote areas are lack of the communications with outsides, while in the other way, because of this, the cultural tradition in remote areas persevered even better than the cultural traditions in the major cities. In major cities, people have more chance to contact with the foreign cultural traditions, some of the cultural traditions may be considered too complex and finally deserted by people, since they can not be suit to fast pace of today's society. In this perspective, the government should spend even more money and energy in preserving the cultural tradition in the remote areas, since they are preserved and generated more complete than that in major cities. Otherwise, these cultural traditions will come to extinct for the sake of lack of the financial support.

Admittedly, since the limited resource of the government, the government should only concentrate on the issue of cultural tradition preserved and generated. There are many other issues needed to solve, such as the development of economics, the health of citizens and the stability of the society. I am sure that if the city has a quite high rate of criminal, and suffers from several diseases, no matter how cultural traditions persevered and generated in the cities, no visitors will travel there and these cultural traditions will come to extinction in the future.

To sum up, due to the above mentioned reasons, which correlated with each other to generate a integrate whole, and becomes more convincing than any single reason, we may comfortable to say that the major city and remote area play a equally important role in persevering and generating the cultural traditions, the government should give finical supports to both areas, rather than to neglect the remote areas. And the government also should take other issues of the cities development into consideration.

[ Last edited by staralways on 2005-7-24 at 22:57 ]

abigredUID: 154473

Governments must ensure that their major cities receive the financial support they need in order to thrive, because it is primarily in cities that a nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated.
------正文------
The author asserts that major cities should receive the financial support from the government for their development, since the nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated in these major cities. In my point of view, I partly agree with the author's opinion that is不用is吧 the major cities play a crucial role in preserving and generating the nation's cultural traditions; meanwhile, we also should not neglect to protect the culture preserved in remote areas.

In the first place, the major cities play a considerable part in persevering and generating the tradition culture of a nation. Thorough many famous city, such as Pairs of France, London of Britain, Cairo of Egypt and Beijing of China, we can understand the characteristic of the whole nation. There are many famous resorts and culture relic in these cities, such as the Big Ben in London, the Summer Palace in Beijing and the Pyramid in Egypt 还有巴黎的卢浮宫. Visitors expected to understand the culture of whole nations thorough the witness of these famous resorts and culture relics. However, the fee  of expense on  maintenance and protect these resorts are quite high, only relying on the income of travelers is far from enough. Since the government have the reasonability to preserve the traditional culture, it must take amount of money for the major cities to thrive, so that they can preserve and generate the cultural traditions.

In the second place, when we focus on the development of the major cities, we also should not neglect the cultural tradition in the remote areas. These cultural traditions are also one parts of the whole nation cultural traditions. Since the inconvenience traffic, the remote areas are lack of the communications with outsides, while in the other way, because of this, the cultural tradition in remote areas persevered even better than the cultural traditions in the major cities. In major cities, people have more chance to contact with the foreign cultural traditions, some of the cultural traditions may be considered too complex and finally deserted by people, since they can not be suit to fast pace of today's society. In this perspective, the government should spend even more money and energy in preserving the cultural tradition in the remote areas, since they are preserved and generated more complete than that in major cities. Otherwise, these cultural traditions will come to extinct for the sake of lack of the financial support.

Admittedly, since the limited resource of the government, the government should not only concentrate on the issue of cultural tradition preserved and generated. There are many other issues needed to solve, such as the development of economics, the health of citizens and the stability of the society. I am sure that if the city has a quite high rate of criminal, and suffers from several diseases, no matter how cultural traditions persevered and generated in the cities, no visitors will travel there and these cultural traditions will come to extinction extincted in the future.

To sum up, due to the above mentioned reasons reasons mentioned above, which correlated with each other to generate a integrate whole, and becomes more convincing than any single reason, we may comfortable to say that the major city and remote area play a equally important role in persevering and generating the cultural traditions, the government should give finical supports to both areas, rather than to neglect the remote areas. And the government also should take other issues of the cities development into consideration. 最后一句好像意犹未尽

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=304986

[ Last edited by abigred on 2005-7-24 at 23:13 ]

d_messiahUID: 177468

The author asserts that major cities should receive the financial support from the government for their development, since the nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated in these major cities. In my point of view, I partly agree with the author's opinion that is  删 the major cities play a crucial role in preserving and generating the nation's cultural traditions; meanwhile, we also should not neglect to protect the culture preserved in remote areas.

In the first place, the major cities play a considerable part in persevering and generating the tradition culture of a nation. Thorough many famous city  cities, such as Pairs of France, London of Britain, Cairo of Egypt and Beijing of China, we can understand the characteristic of the whole nation. There are many famous resorts and culture relic in these cities, such as the Big Ben in London, the Summer Palace in Beijing and the Pyramid in Egypt. Visitors expected to understand the culture of whole nations thorough the witness of these famous resorts and culture relics. However, the fee of maintenance and protect these resorts are quite high, only relying on the income of travelers far from enough  有什么理由这么说呢，我就觉得这些地方的保护，不仅不用政府掏钱了，相反，旅游业的发展不仅可以自足，还能带动相关产业的发展，如零售业，服务业等等，从某种意义上说文化已经不是单纯的保护的对象，而成了一种赚钱的手段和工具，当然这是我的观点，不过，至少你想表到i的观点，也最好有点儿例证. Since the government have the reasonability to preserve the traditional culture, it must take amount of money for the major cities to thrive, so that they can preserve and generate the cultural traditions.

In the second place, when we focus on the development of the major cities, we also should not neglect the cultural tradition in the remote areas. These cultural traditions are also one parts  part of the whole nation cultural traditions. Since the inconvenience traffic, the remote areas are lack of the communications with outsides, while in the other way, because of this, the cultural tradition in remote areas are persevered even better than the cultural traditions thosein the major cities. In major cities, people have more chance to contact with the foreign cultural traditions, some of the cultural traditions may be 这句话出现了两个谓语，没有连词吧 considered too complex and finally deserted by people, since they can not be suit to fast pace of today's society感觉有些问题，不能迎合快节奏就扔了？ . In this perspective, the government should spend even more money and energy in preserving the cultural tradition in the remote areas, since they are preserved and generated more complete than that in major cities. Otherwise, these cultural traditions will come to extinct for the sake of lack of the financial support前面的论述没有体现出来而且，你这里的THESE指的不是很清楚，你没有把偏远地区急需财政保证的原因说出来，只说大城市的保存不好，而从后者能推出的是，大城市更需要钱保护，我这么觉得的.

Admittedly, since the limited resource of the government, the government should only少个not吧 concentrate on the issue of cultural tradition preserved and generated. There are many other issues needed to solve  solving, such as the development of economics, the health of citizens and the stability of the society. I am sure这个词用得感觉不好 that if the city has a quite high rate of criminal, and suffers from several diseases, no matter how cultural traditions persevered and generated in the cities, no visitors will travel there and these cultural traditions will come to extinction in the future.

To sum up, due to the above mentioned reasons, which correlated with each other to generate a integrate whole, and becomes more convincing than any single reason, we may comfortable to say that the major city and remote area play a equally上面的论述似乎没有体现出来 important role in persevering and generating the cultural traditions, the government should give finical supports to both areas, rather than to neglect the remote areas. And the government also should take other issues of the cities development into consideration.


B2 有问题，你在B2中想论证的是偏远地区的文化不可忽视，可你没有直接说明，只说在大城市的文化没有很好的保存下来，我倒觉得这样的论述放到B1中用以支持大城市更需要，或者单纯说明大城市不是传统文化的保存和流传主要地点好，总之，B2 在论证过程中和论点间脱节了