issue83 同主题, V6互改战队

11yvetteUID：2102418

------题目------
Government should preserve publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state, even though these areas are often extremely remote and thus accessible to only a few people.
------正文------
Whether government should protect the wilderness areas is always argued. Some people are approving the protection adopted by government while some others decide to object. In my opinion, the most effective way to save the wilderness areas is the government management on those publicly owned wilderness areas, including the remote areas.

To begin with, government protection on the wilderness areas, especially these areas in danger, may help those places keep their own circumstance. For, government activities are took under deliberate considerations, reasonable surveys and totally evaluations. All the preparations are assisted by the experts who are familiar with the field of the activity.  Once the protection started, experts are also tracking with its process, providing technical assistance and professional training. For example, Everglade National Park is almost the sanctuary for a large number of birds and reptiles, as well as for threatened species such as the manatee. If the government does not adopt any measure, we can only account the number of the manatees by ten fingers, or even we can not see them for their disappearance. So we can not ignore these positive effects brought by the government activity on preserving the wilderness areas.

Moreover, not only the natural areas in danger, the ordinary areas also need aid by government, through the intervention of the government, the situation in these places may get better. The Natural Heritage sites listed by UNSECO are the encouragement for government to identify, protect and preserve the cultural and natural heritage within their national territory. 20 years ago, when Wulingyuan Area is nominated to Natural Heritage List, the government put into 20 billion RMB for turning down the illegal buildings and ameliorated the circumstance there. This measure not only helped protect Wulingyuan Area but also enhanced its surroundings. What is more, lots of wilderness areas possess thousands of species of animals and plants.  After government protection and experts' concentration, studies on these species assist experts better recognize them, and better preserve them. This circular deed is the most valid approach to attain the aim.

Last but not least, the extremely remote areas should also be paid attention by the government. Accessible to only a few people is temporary, and the ability of human being is out of imagination. We can not expect that when human beings will invade these areas to enlarge their territory. 20/20 hindsight is always clever, however, when the ecological balance is destroyed, and any effort seems helpless at the time, so government should cast a long sight to prevent the tragedy happen. 40 years before, national government encourage citizens to cut trees which helps reconstruct the nation, mountains became bald, remote area gradually uncovered to the public, and the aftermath was facing to the nation 30 years later, land can hardly hold water which causes environmental problems such as floods and sliding and desertification. Government called the public to help plant trees again in order to attain the rebalance. After another 10 years' effort, the circumstance changes a little. As a result, government decision should be made under a long perspective, or the nature would repay the force equally or even more severe than once human being treated it. What is to say, the remote areas are as significant as areas in danger to be preserved by government.

In sum, wilderness areas should be kept in their primeval state by government as we discussed above, not simply to preserve these threatened ecological areas and species, but also to protect and make the areas much better, give the animals and plants a more comfortable living condition, as well as these areas which are remote and accessible to only a few people.

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[ Last edited by 11yvette on 2005-7-30 at 23:54 ]

dingzjUID：2101797

------题目------
Government should preserve publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state, even though these areas are often extremely remote and thus accessible to only a few people.
------正文------
Whether government should protect the wilderness areas is always argued. Some people are approving the protection adopted by government while some others decide to object. In my opinion, the most effective way to save the wilderness areas is the government management on those publicly owned wilderness areas, including the remote areas. 争论观点+自己观点 开头 主题明确

To begin with, government protection on the wilderness areas, especially these areas in danger, may help those places keep their own circumstance. For, government activities are took under deliberate considerations, reasonable surveys and totally evaluations. All the preparations are assisted by the experts who are familiar with the field of the activity.  Once the protection started, experts are also tracking with its process, providing technical assistance and professional training. For example, Everglade National Park is almost the sanctuary for a large number of birds and reptiles, as well as for threatened species such as the manatee. If the government does not adopt any measure, we can only account the number of the manatees by ten fingers, or even we can not see them for their disappearance. So we can not ignore these positive effects brought by the government activity on preserving the wilderness areas. 3个we can，句式太呆板了吧，换换？ 本段讲述政府有很大的能力对环境进行保护，并能带来相应的益处，但，一个问题，最后一句讲positive effect像是要在下一段转折 到negetive effect一样...

Moreover, not only the natural areas in danger, the ordinary areas also need aid by government. Through the intervention of the government, the situation in these places may get better. The Natural Heritage sites listed by UNSECO are the encouragement for government to identify, protect and preserve the cultural and natural heritage within their national territory. 20 years ago, when Wulingyuan Area is nominated to Natural Heritage List, the government put into 20 billion RMB for turning down the illegal buildings and ameliorated the circumstance there. This measure not only helped protect Wulingyuan Area but also enhanced its surroundings. What is more, lots of wilderness areas possess thousands of species of animals and plants.  After government protection and experts' concentration, studies on these species assist experts better recognize them, and better preserve them. This circular deed is the most valid approach to attain the aim. 本段讲述就连ordinary areas especially cultural and natural heritage 也应该值得保护，与上段进一步递进

Last but not least, the extremely remote areas should also be paid attention by the government. Accessible to only a few people is temporary, and the ability of human being is out of imagination.？？没懂 We can not expect that when human beings will invade these areas to enlarge their territory. 20/20 hindsight is always clever, however, when the ecological balance is destroyed, and any effort seems helpless at the time, so government should cast a long sight to prevent the tragedy happen. 40 years before, national government encourage citizens to cut trees which helps reconstruct the nation, mountains became bald, remote area gradually uncovered to the public, and the aftermath was facing to the nation 30 years later, land can hardly hold water which causes environmental problems such as floods and sliding and desertification. Government called the public to help plant trees again in order to attain the rebalance. After another 10 years' effort, the circumstance changes a little. As a result, government decision should be made under a long perspective, or the nature would repay the force equally or even more severe than once human being treated it. What is to say, the remote areas are as significant as areas in danger to be preserved by government. 本段讲述remote areas 也应该值得保护，进一步递进，但是例子中好像并没有特别突出保护边远地区的重要性，有待加强，不知然否？
In sum, wilderness areas should be kept in their primeval state by government as we discussed above, not simply to preserve these threatened ecological areas and species, but also to protect and make the areas much better, give the animals and plants a more comfortable living condition, as well as these areas which are remote and accessible to only a few people. 总结中没有把第二观点加进去吧？

11yvetteUID：2102418

谢谢dingzj指出的问题
我的语句太匮乏了,还得好好改改的
关于B3的例子问题也会再斟酌
谢谢啦~~