issue36 V6站队 8.10

kobestrongUID: 2117374

Issue36  自我感觉不好,而且限时又没成功,请大家狂拍!
"The greatness of individuals can be decided only by those who live after them, not by their contemporaries."


I concede that there were many great individuals in history who did not get fairly evaluation or even suffered from the contempt of peers by coevals. However, we can not overlook that there were also many individuals' greatness being recognized by their contemporaries. Meanwhile, with the development of society and academy, more great people will get reward in life time.

Admittedly, so many great individuals were not recognized by their coevals or even suffered from contempt of peers, especially in the earlier time. Let's have a look at Bruno. His greatness, in our eyes today, is without any doubt. However, in his time, the ideology of the society was under the control of the religion authorities, who adhered to the belief that the earth was the center of the universe. The whole society considered Bruno crazy and at last sentenced him to death because of his persistence in the idea that the universe is infinite. Another example is Van Gogh, the great Netherlandish painter. Because his style and thought was totally different from others, few people could understand him that time, and in his life time, only one of his masterpieces was sold. Thus, we can come to the conclusion that due to the ideologies of these individuals were far beyond the majorities' or their theory required more experiments to support, they could hardly be recognized by the contemporaries.

However, we could not assert that the greatness of individuals can be decided only by the later generations, because there were also many other great people whose greatnesses were recognized by the coevals. Michelangelo's talent and greatness was found in his life time, and patronized by the Pop for his art career; Einstein, one of the greatest physicists, was not only recognized by the coevals but also rewarded the Nobel Prize; Mao Zedong, the first chairman of PRC, who led the people out of the old society and building a new republic, was no doubt admired by both the contemporaries and the offspring; Bill Gates, the founder of the Microsoft, doing a great contribute to the American's economy and the development in the computer science and technology, was also considered a great person nowadays. Thus, we could not overlook all these great individuals recognized by their coevals.

Furthermore, a maturing society and academy make it easier for great people to get rewarded in the life time. With the development in every respects, people's minds are freer than before that they would not be easily baffled by the obsolete theories; the technology is advanced that there would be more accurate methods or experiments to support the new theory. Therefore, there is no doubt that most of the great individuals would be recognized in their life time.

To sum up, though there were many people being obscured in their life time, we can not overlook others who were rewarded by coevals. In addition, the advanced academy and open minded public today could contribute to the recognition of the great people.

mkb57288UID: 2105771

正好我下面也要写这一篇，今天一定来拍

nickaaronleeUID: 183378

我先来拍拍

nickaaronleeUID: 183378

"The greatness of individuals can be decided only by those who live after them, not by their contemporaries."

I concede that there were many great individuals in history who did not get fairly evaluation or even suffered from the contempt of peers by coevals. However, we can not overlook that there were also many individuals' greatness being recognized by their contemporaries. Meanwhile, with the development of society and academy, more great people will get reward in life time.

Admittedly, so many great individuals were not recognized by their coevals or even suffered from contempt of peers, especially in the earlier time.（最好分析一下再举例） Let's have a look at Bruno. His greatness, in our eyes today, is without any doubt. However, in his time, the ideology of the society was under the control of the religion authorities, who adhered to the belief that the earth was the center of the universe. The whole society considered Bruno crazy and at last sentenced him to death because of his persistence in the idea that the universe is infinite. Another example is Van Gogh, the great Netherlandish painter. Because his style and thought was totally different from others, few people could understand him that time, and in his life time, only one of his masterpieces was sold. Thus, we can come to the conclusion that due to the ideologies of these individuals were far beyond the majorities' or their theory required more experiments to support, they could hardly be recognized by the contemporaries.（其他问题不大）

However, we could not assert that the greatness of individuals can be decided only by the later generations, because there were also many other great people whose greatnesses were recognized by the coevals. Michelangelo's talent and greatness was found in his life time, and patronized by the Pop for his art career; Einstein, one of the greatest physicists, was not only recognized by the coevals but also rewarded the Nobel Prize; Mao Zedong, the first chairman of PRC, who led the people out of the old society and building a new republic, was no doubt admired by both the contemporaries and the offspring; Bill Gates, the founder of the Microsoft, doing a great contribute to the American's economy and the development in the computer science and technology, was also considered a great person nowadays. （粒子都举得不错，而且简洁明了，很不错，但是还缺少一个分析）Thus, we could not overlook all these great individuals recognized by their coevals.

Furthermore, a maturing society and academy make it easier for great people to get rewarded in the life time. With the development in every respects, people's minds are freer than before that they would not be easily baffled by the obsolete theories; the technology is advanced that there would be more accurate methods or experiments to support the new theory. Therefore, there is no doubt that most of the great individuals would be recognized in their life time.（缺乏深入地分析，说服力不强。观点没有问题，最好有一个例证）

To sum up, though there were many people being obscured in their life time, we can not overlook others who were rewarded by coevals. In addition, the advanced academy and open minded public today could contribute to the recognition of the great people.
（总的来说还不错，有两个问题：例证之后最好在分析一下，b3缺乏一个例证。加油~~~互拍）

mkb57288UID: 2105771

I concede that there were many great individuals in history who did not get fairly evaluation or even suffered from the contempt of peers by coevals. However, we can not overlook that there were also many individuals' greatness being recognized by their contemporaries. Meanwhile, with the development of society and academy, more great people will get reward in life time.从开头看是结构完整的，语言也没有赘述，赞一下

Admittedly, so many great individuals were not recognized[color=red（appreciated）]  by their coevals or even suffered from contempt of peers, especially in the earlier time（呼应首段，好） . Let's have a look at Bruno. His greatness, in our eyes today, is without any doubt. However, in his time, the ideology of the society was under the control of the religion authorities, who adhered to the belief that the earth was the center of the universe. （前面句子很流畅） The whole society considered Bruno crazy and at last sentenced him to death because of his persistence in the idea that the universe is infinite. Another example is Van Gogh, the great Netherlandish painter. Because his style and thought was totally different from others, few people could understand him that time, and in his life time, only one of his masterpieces was sold. Thus, we can come to the conclusion that due to the ideologies of these individuals were far beyond（在前面的例子里也应该在多强调一下ahead of the pace of era）  the majorities' or their theory required more experiments to support, they could hardly be recognized by the contemporaries.（论证和例子的比例还要再调和一下，论证略显单薄了，但总体的感觉是很好的）  

However, we could not assert that the greatness of individuals can be decided only by the later generations, because there were also many other great people whose greatnesses were recognized by the coevals. Michelangelo's talent and greatness was found in his life time, and patronized by the Pop for his art career; Einstein, one of the greatest physicists, was not only recognized by the coevals but also rewarded the Nobel Prize; Mao Zedong, the first chairman（primary founder） of PRC, who ledliberate free from the people out of the old society and building a new republic, was no doubt admired by both the contemporaries and the offspring; Bill Gates, the founder of the Microsoft, doing a great contribute to the American's economy and the development in the computer science and technology, was also considered a great person nowadays. （论证还是单薄了，不能完全靠堆例子，最好交待一下原因）Thus, we could not overlook all these great individuals recognized by their coevals.

Furthermore, a maturing society and academy make it easier for great people to get rewarded in the life time. With the development in every respects, people's minds are freer than before that they would not be easily baffled by the obsolete theories; the technology is advanced that there would be more accurate methods or experiments to support the new theory. Therefore, there is no doubt that most of the great individuals would be recognized in their life time.（从结构上来说这一段发挥的不错）

To sum up, though there were many people being obscured in their life time, we can not overlook others who were rewarded by coevals. In addition, the advanced academy and open minded public today could contribute to the recognition of the great people.
总体感觉是不错的，语言流畅，就是论证根例子比起来单薄了不少，加油！！

mkb57288UID: 2105771

本来今天想写这一篇，但拖了一下，最终没有下笔，明天一定发上了，大家互拍

kobestrongUID: 2117374

多谢两位战友的指教！
我也是一直觉得自己说完例子就没话说了！
加油加油！