issue7 G-89-互助社-10日同主题写作

dennyaimarUID: 191857

限时失败，感觉这篇题目简单但是不好写
------题目------
The video camera provides such an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life that it has become a more important form of documentation than written records.
------提纲------
Video camera有自己的优点，但是不能代替书
1，V准确，纪实，及时，有说服力。
2，有些领域的纪录在V出现之后成为可能。
3，但是有些领域，V无法涉及，像经济领域，心理领域，科学领域，这些是V无法纪录的东西，从这点上看，V是无法取代书面纪录的。
------正文------
Contemporary society sometimes is portrayed as dominated by the development of science and technology. And more and more new inventions have replace old ones, as video camera, which some people considerate as a substitute of written records. Admittedly video camera has many virtues which book do not possess, and contribute to certain areas that paper document never attained. But it cannot take place of written records.

Firstly, video documents are accurate. A video tape of an accident can show the truth which may be amended by newspaper writer later. Audiences can possess their own ideas about the occurrence without the influence of writer or reporter. Video is also lively, which benefits most people who cannot reach the place. People now can sit at home and watch soccer match instead of buy a ticket and drive to the field.  Seldom ones are willing to read the newspaper the next day instead of watching the live show if their costs are equal. These two merits make video itself convincing. Once a crime happened, nothing can be better evidence in the court than a video tape which document the process. Video is sometimes a better documentary than paper.

On the other hand, the records of some certain areas are now accessible because of video camera. For instance, video camera is requisite equipment on an unmanned spaceship so that the ship can automatically send back the pictures from the space. Supposed video has never been invented, it is impossible for an "auto typist" on the ship to send back such accurate information of cosmos. Cameras can also broad the researching of underwater area. Biologists can now easily possess the information of sea animals and document the living habit of them. Under this circumstance, video has its own value to exist in daily lives and other special place.

However, video cannot cover all spheres of human lives. Camera seems to be useless in some events such as the report of economic crisis, pandemic panic of a disaster, specially the psyche field. Video cannot display what human beings are thinking about. In stead, the psychologists can accurately write their researching reports. Science is another area which is out of the potent of video. Most research results can only be saved by written records, as a mathematic law. Books can explain the science in detail clearly, which makes the outcome of research be acceptable. In these spectrums, written materials are more contributive than video.

To sum up, video has many merits and benefit human beings in certain areas, but it cannot simply be defined as a surrogate of written records. These two methods have their distinct uses. Under some circumstance we should choose video, while we may use paper at other situation. We should utilize both of them, rather than choose one to substitute the other.

mvpzhuangUID: 205051

偶等下给你看看

mvpzhuangUID: 205051

Contemporary society sometimes is portrayed as dominated by the development of science and technology. And more and more new inventions have replace old ones, as video camera, which some people considerate as a substitute of written records. Admittedly 偶喜欢这个词可就是不会用，今天会了video camera has many virtues which book do not possess, and contribute to certain areas that paper document never attained. But it cannot take place of written records.开头不错

Firstly, video documents are 太绝对了吧 用个sometimes吧，有时不见得阿accurate. A video tape of an accident can show the truth which may be amended by newspaper writer later. Audiences can possess their own ideas about the occurrence without the influence of writer or reporter. Video is also lively, which benefits most people who cannot reach the place你是想说现场吧. People now can sit at home and watch soccer match instead of buy a ticket and drive to the field.  Seldom ones are willing to read the newspaper the next day instead of watching the live show if their costs are equal这个有点奇怪阿，什么支出一样啊 ？会一样吗？. These two merits make video itself convincing这句也有点怪阿. Once a crime happened, nothing can be better evidence in the court than a video tape which document the process. Video is sometimes a better documentary than paper.例子很好但是觉得论证语言在严密一点

On the other hand, the records of some certain areas are now accessible because of video camera. For instance, video camera is requisite equipment on an unmanned spaceship so that the ship can automatically send back the pictures from the space. Supposed video has never been invented, it is impossible for an "auto typist" on the ship to send back such accurate information of cosmos. 虽然从表面看例子可以支持论点，可是从常识来看，video会比太空飞船还晚吗？不过还想也可以，讨论下吧Cameras can also broad the researching of underwater area. Biologists can now easily possess the information of sea animals and document the living habit of them. Under this circumstance, video has its own value to exist in daily lives and other special place.

However, video cannot cover all spheres of human lives. Camera seems to be useless in some events such as the report of economic crisis,video一样可以阿，应该说是没有办法纪录数据 pandemic panic of a disaster, specially the psyche field. Video cannot display what human beings are thinking about. 好In stead, the psychologists can accurately write their researching reports. Science is another area which is out of the potent of video. Most research results can only be saved by written records, as a mathematic law. Books can explain the science in detail clearly, which makes the outcome of research be acceptable. In these spectrums, written materials are more contributive than video.

To sum up, video has many merits and benefit human beings in certain areas, but it cannot simply be defined as a surrogate of written records. These two methods have their distinct uses. Under some circumstance we should choose video, while we may use paper at other situation. We should utilize both of them, rather than choose one to substitute the other.

总体还是可以，例子都找得很好，只是在加强一点论证的清晰性和深度
一家之言哈
你也来看看我的吧 今天写的。。。
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... ge=1&highlight=
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... ge=1&highlight=

huangdaoUID: 190018

------题目------
The video camera provides such an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life that it has become a more important form of documentation than written records.
------提纲------
Video camera有自己的优点，但是不能代替书
1，V准确，纪实，及时，有说服力。
2，有些领域的纪录在V出现之后成为可能。
3，但是有些领域，V无法涉及，像经济领域，心理领域，科学领域，这些是V无法纪录的东西，从这点上看，V是无法取代书面纪录的。
------正文------
Contemporary society sometimes is portrayed as dominated by the development of science and technology. And more and more换成increasing吧 new inventions have replaced old ones, as video camera, which some people consider as a substitute of written records. Admittedly video camera has many virtues which books do not possess, and contributes to certain areas that paper document never attained. But it cannot take place of written records.

Firstly, video documents are accurate. A video tape of an accident can show the truth which may be amended by newspaper writer later. Audiences can possess their own ideas about the occurrence without the influence of writer or reporter. Video is also lively 可以用vivid，而且没有在主题句中提到, which benefits most people who cannot reach the place. People now can sit at home and watch soccer match instead of buy a ticket and drive to the field.  Seldom ones are willing to read the newspaper the next day instead of watching the live show if their costs are equal. These two merits make video itself convincing. Once a crime happened, nothing can be better evidence in the court than a video tape which document the process. Video is sometimes a better documentary than paper.

论述略有一点乱， 结构可能不够清晰

On the other hand, the records of some certain areas are now accessible because of video camera. For instance, video camera is requisite equipment on an unmanned spaceship so that the ship can automatically send back the pictures from the space. Supposed video has never been invented, it is impossible for an "auto typist" on the ship to send back such accurate information of cosmos. Cameras can also broad the researching of underwater area. Biologists can now easily possess the information of sea animals and document the living habit of them. Under this circumstance, video has its own value to exist in daily lives 好像论述中没提到，都是科研中and other special place.

However, video cannot cover all spheres of human lives. Camera seems to be useless in some events such as the report of economic crisis, pandemic panic of a disaster, specially the psyche field. Video cannot display what human beings are thinking about. Instead, the psychologists can accurately write their researching reports. Science   to some extent is another area which is out of the potent of video. Most research results can only be saved by written records, as a mathematic law. Books can explain the science in detail clearly, which makes the outcome of research be acceptable. In these spectrums, written materials are more contributive than video.

To sum up, video has many merits and benefit human beings in certain areas, but it cannot simply be defined as a surrogate of written records. These two methods have their distinct uses. Under some circumstance we should choose video, while we may use paper at other situation. We should utilize both of them, rather than choose one to substitute the other.

个人感觉，有些语言还是用得不到位，结构基本没问题，词汇的替换也不错（别是金山），形成自己的语言风格。

dennyaimarUID: 191857

谢谢指教了
周末我多写一点
多改一点呵呵`