argument200【0906背水一战三月小组】第五次作业by yuxin

周禹馨UID??2526495

题目：ARGUMENT200 - Statistics collected from dentists indicate that three times more men than women faint while visiting the dentist. This evidence suggests that men are more likely to be distressed about having dental work done than women are. Thus, dentists who advertise to attract patients should target the male consumer and emphasize both the effectiveness of their anesthetic techniques and the sensitivity of their staff to nervous or suffering patients.
字数：503
用时：00:30:00
日期：3/9/2009 8:55:38 PM
男性晕的多不代表他们更容易distress
质疑目标为男患者会吸引病人
质疑广告中的所谓敏感性的问题
In the argument, the speaker recommends that the dentists should target the male consumer and emphasize both the effectiveness of their anesthetic techniques and the sensitivity of their staff to nervous or suffering patient, in order to attract patients. He based on a statistic asserting which
indicates man are more likely to be distressed about having dental work. However convictive it may seem, both the evidence and the conclusion is untenable.

To begin with, the three times more men than women faint cannot served to suggest man are more likely to be distressed when having dental work.. Unfortunately, the statistic lacks reliability to sufficiently support the claim. First, lacking the total number of the men patients and women patients, we have good reason to doubt whether it is the dramatically more number of men patients leads to the result. In reality, the rate of distress is higher in women patients. Second, there are a myriad of forms indicating distress, not the faint only. Perhaps the women tend to sweating, trembling when they feel high stressful and painful. And the number of those ones may far more than the number of men who faint when visiting dentists. Also, there may be possibility that a large number of women were too distressed to avoid visiting a dentist and prefer lying on bed at home. Therefore, the author could neither rule out the scenarios, nor offer the total amount of both men and women patients, the statistic lends scant support to the claim.

What's more, in claiming targeting the male consumer, the author implies this act will attract more people. However, it may be not the case at all. It is entirely possible that the women are more inclined to suffer from dental disease than men. What they concern about may different from the men patients do. They may concern more about the quality of the dentists' skills, and their career moral. If so, only targeting male consumers will not attract the patients, rather decrease the number of potential customers, since they ignore the women patients, such a large consumer group.

Finally, when asserting the sensitivity of their staff to nervous or suffering patients, the author assumes this would help to relieve the men consumers distress. The speaker fails to substantiate how much this sensitivity will help to relieve the men patients stress and distress, and we have good reason to doubt the effectiveness of this sensitivity. It maybe totally results in an counterproductive consequence. For example, when the staff are perceptive of the patients' stress and suffering, this emotion may on the contrary increase the staff's stress, and they make some mistakes on their job, this, as a result, would make the patients feel much more painful.

In sum, the evidence is so untenable as to lend scant support to the conclusion. Besides, the measures mentioned in conclusion itself lacks sense and may go a long way to the speaker's original expectation. If the speaker can offer more information about what are the patients most concern about, dentists may attract more patients.

yunfeiyang4everUID??2604917

【原文】
In the argument, the speaker recommends that the dentists should target the male consumer and emphasize both the effectiveness of their anesthetic techniques and the sensitivity of their staff to nervous or suffering patient, in order to attract patients. He based on a statistic asserting which indicates man are more likely to be distressed about having dental work. However convictive it may seem, both the evidence and the conclusion is untenable.(开头简洁，概括了题目中的要点)

To begin with, the three times more men than women faint cannot served to suggest man are more likely to be distressed when having dental work. Unfortunately, the statistic lacks reliability to sufficiently support the claim. First, lacking the total number of the men patients and women patients(men and women patients更简洁), we have good reason to doubt whether it is the dramatically more number of men patients leads to the result. In reality, the rate of distress is higher in women patients. Second, there are a myriad of forms indicating distress, not the faint only. Perhaps the women tend to sweating, trembling when they feel high stressful and painful. And the number of those ones may far more than the number of men who faint when visiting dentists. Also, there may be possibility that a large number of women were too distressed to avoid visiting a dentist and prefer lying on bed at home. Therefore, the author could neither rule out the scenarios, nor offer the total amount of both men and women patients, the statistic lends scant support to the claim.

What's more, in claiming targeting the male consumer, the author implies this action will attract more people. However, it may be not the case at all. It is entirely possible that the women are more inclined to suffer from dental disease than men. What they concern about may different from the men patients do. They may concern more about the quality(作者想说医生的水品，quality貌似不太合适) of the dentists' skills, and their career moral. If so, only targeting male consumers will not attract the(more替换好一些) patients, rather decrease the number of potential customers, since they ignore the women patients, such a large consumer group.

Finally, when asserting the sensitivity of their staff to nervous or suffering patients, the author assumes this would help to relieve the men consumers(consumers’替换) distress. The speaker fails to substantiate how much this sensitivity will help to relieve the men patients stress and distress, and we have good reason to doubt the effectiveness of this sensitivity. It maybe totally results in an(a替换) counterproductive consequence. For example, when the staffs are perceptive of the patients' stress and suffering, this emotion(有点罗嗦：being perceptive of the patients’ stress and suffering) may on the contrary increase the staff's stress, and they make some mistakes on their job, this, as a result, would make the patients feel much more painful.

In sum, the evidence is so untenable as to lend scant support to the conclusion. Besides, the measures mentioned in conclusion itself lacks sense and may go a long way to the speaker's original expectation. If the speaker can offer more information about what are the patients most concern about, dentists may attract more patients.

总体挺棒，攻击都很到位，而且具体，语言上个别词汇稍加注意即可