30) Teachers' salaries should be based on their students' academic performance.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim.
In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.
习作
In a society where a student needs scores to graduate, to get in to higher education and to prove himself as a qualified job candidate, academic performance is very important thoughout the educational system and therefore should be among the top priorities of a teacher's concerns. However, I only agree with the claim on certain particular senarios. For some particular test-related teaching program, a salary incentive associated with students' academic performance may will benefit the effect of teaching, while such incentive would be inappropirate, or even dangerous, when it comes to other kind of the teaching program and the whole public education system.
needs scores to graduate 表达有问题 need to perform well academically prove himself 表达
may will benefit 表达
test-related teaching program不懂啥意思
你有尝试分类立论 但是我看完了你的主旨句却不知道你所说的test-related teaching program以及other kind of the teaching program and the whole public education system.是指的啥
First, whether the teachers' effort can be evaluated by their students' academic performance depends on different kinds of education program. 这句话应该放在主旨句里 For training programs especially designed for a certain test, for instance, in a GRE training school, it is reasonable for a teachers' salary to fluctuate according to the academic performance, or the improvement of their performance. However, teachers who work with programs cultivating students’ hobbies or general abilities, it is unfair and impossible to judge the teacher's value based on scores. For example, in a special education program focus on mentally disabled children, academic performance would never been used in evaluate student's improvement, let alone determining teachers' salaries based on it. Other examples would be programs focus on fine art, music and sports, which are not designed for students to pass an exam but to improve their aesthetic skills and physical health.
Second, even for a program in which students' academic performance can be measured, determining teacher's salaries on student's scores should be very cautious. For such policy may encourage teachers focusing on test-passing skills and neglect many other important aspects that can't be tested. For example, under such policy, a middle school physics teachers may neglect students' strong passion in the experiments of basic physics phenomenon, but fill the blackboards with boring formulas and theories, which can eventually suppresses students’ passion in learning physics. Good-looking score reports may there be, but the spirit of education would be rendered.
the spirit of education would be rendered不懂
这段和上段的关联在哪里
你想说teachers, under the proposed policy, will focus on tests rather than real learning
这个point挺好
但是和你的TS并不呼应啊
TS(pt1,pt2,pt3)
ts(pt1)
ts(pt2)
ts(pt3)
你真的弄明白了1+3模型么
Moreover, for the entire public education system, it is quite dangerous to adopt a reward mechanism based on student's academic performance, which can lead to uneven distribution of educational source. The natural gap between students with different family backgrounds, income, ethnic groups, may will influence their academic performance, and teachers being encouraged to teach students who will easily achieve higher performance would drive teacher resource to wealthier and well developed areas, which will be harmful to the entire society.
To sum up, it is true that in some programs teachers’ should be encouraged to help their students to achieve better score, but their salaries, in many occasion can't simply be based on students academic performance. To ensure fully development of every student in a society, teacher's compensation should be synthetically determined.
6) A nation should require all of its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.
In a nation, a standard national curriculum plays a vital role in its educational systems. I agree with the part of implementing a national curriculum, however, I don't agree with part of the recommendation that the same curriculum should be applied to all the students in the country. For most students, to ensure their development and equal education, a national curriculum would be appliable. However, for some students with particular backgrounds, and for students with special needs, such as disabled students, a national curriculum might cause an consequences lead to unfairness.
感觉你这个观点还是挺不错的,但是表达上不够清晰
具体这句话 表达问题很多- I agree with the part of implementing a national curriculum, however, I don't agree with part of the recommendation that the same curriculum should be applied to all the students in the country.
你大概的意思是
I agree that the government should introduce a national curriculum for all the students to study in order to ...
Nevertheless, exceptions should be made for certain groups of students such as ... and ... because ...
另外不要提Tibet 这个在美国很敏感
然后语言表达的细节问题也比较多 比如 standardize the educational levels 这个不知道是啥意思
你貌似马上要考了 祝你好运!
For most students in public education system,a national curriculum would standardize the educational levels in different schools and regions, and make sure every student gets the same opportunity. For example, many countries have enacted laws to ensure their youngsters get a certain period of compulsory education and specified what kind of classes, literature, math, physical education, art, etc. they should take, and some even publishes standard text books for most students enrolled in public education system. Such policies will make sure all students, no matter wealthy or poor, have access to the basic and necessary knowledge before they go to colleges or job market.
However, for students with some certain backgrounds, it would be inappropriate for them to be forced to take the national curriculum that might carry the values that conflict to their culture or in a language they don't speak. Take education in Tibet area of China for example, implementing in a standard curriculum that was adopted in most areas in China would be inappropriate. Such policy would be very difficult for Tibet students, as the curriculum might challenge Buddhism they believe in, and fail to address on their own culture enough. Another example would be French-speaking students in Montreal, Canada: it would impossible for them to take the same curriculum as those do in Toronto and other cities in Canada.
Moreover, for students with some specific conditions, such as students who are disabled, standard curriculum should be altered to meet their demands. It would be impossible for blind students to take fine art lessons, for students who need wheel chairs to take regular PE class.
Although there are many benefits of implementing a national curriculum, given different demands of students in different regions, belonged to minority groups, and with varies special needs I don't agree with the claim that all the students should be required to study the same curriculum. Education system before college stage should be designed for the sake of all students in a nation, therefore, both standardization and diversity should be equally considered. 作者: dingka 时间: 2015-5-7 10:41:33
The following is a memorandum from the business manager of a television station.
"Over the past year, our late-night news program has devoted increased time to national news and less time to weather and local news. During this period, most of the complaints received from viewers were concerned with our station's coverage of weather and local news. In addition, local businesses that used to advertise during our late-night news program have canceled their advertising contracts with us. Therefore, in order to attract more viewers to our news programs and to avoid losing any further advertising revenues, we should expand our coverage of weather and local news on all our news programs."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
The business manager concludes that the late-night news program should increase the time devoted to weather and local news to its former level and by doing this, he believe the program would attract more viewer s and revenues. Reasonable it might appeared at first, to make a cogent argument, there are still some vital evidence missing in interpreting the complaints, analysing the local business advertising fund and the outcome of such recommendations.
First, the manager failed to provide enough evidence to prove that complaints about loss of weather and local news actually increased, and became an issue that the program should pay attention to. Although most of the complaints concerned about the lower level of weather and local news, the overall number of complaints might be much less than before. Another possibility might be there were even a lot more people who used to complained about lack of national news and just got satisfied because of the change, as they can get weather and local news from other channels such as cellphone and social network in stead of the TV. If evidence shown that overall number of complaints they received has dropped 99%, since the program shifted its focus to national news, the argument wouldn't be persuasive.
Second, more evidence would be needed to analyse whether local businesses' cancelling contracts has any connection with the change of the program. Evidence of whether their were particularly in favor of local news would be necessary to determine whether the loss of advertising avenue is a result of less weather and local news. Moreover, we may also need evidence to preclude other possibilities, such as the those business were have a really hard time financially.
Last, even if we postulate there are enough evidence to valid the arguer's conclusion in view complaints and advertising revenues, more evidence would be needed to explicit, when restoring the time of weather and local news, the effect would be as good as he predicts. Evidence such as viewers and other advertising customers will leave as the contents of the program is so unstable, or evidence shown that even more viewers and advertising revenue were actually aiming at the program's focus on national news, would challenge the conclusion.
All in all, to further determine whether the program should return to its former arrangements of weather and local news, the manager should provide more evidence. 作者: Kssandra 时间: 2015-5-7 13:49:24
66) People who are the most deeply committed to an idea or policy are also the most critical of it.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
TS
For sustainable development of an idea or policy, people who really care about it would be very critical while observing its implement. However, I don’t quite agree with the claim because of its definitive tone. Although in some conditions, people would criticize an idea for the sake of its healthy development, in other cases, when people who committed selfishly in unfair policies only because of their own interests, such critism might not exist. Also, people who oppose to an idea often play critical roles too.
TS1
An idea or policy can be healthly developed under consistant self-correction, and those who really committed to it will realize this point and be critical to the ongoing implement.
eg. the amendments of US constitution. the development of science based on correcting mistakes.
TS2
However, for people who are in lack of conscience and committed to ideas or policies to satisify his own need wouldn’t bother to critize them in fear of losing their previlege. Stakeholders would ignore or even depute critism to their obviously flawed ideas simply to maintain their own interests.
eg. Kim’s family reining in North Korea
TS3
Sometimes, harshest critism often comes from those oppose to the policy. Those who don’t approve the idea or policy at first place will have more motives and grounds to be critical.
eg. Most critical comments on a policy made by democratic party often comes from republican side.
18) The well-being of a society is enhanced when many of its people question authority.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
People’s opinion can be a indispensable part to the wellbeings of a society, however the extent to which I agree with the claim depends whether there are enough premises. For a well designed democratic systems, people questioning its authority will be no doubtly beneficial, however, the claim can’t be valid, with out the conditions, such as the availabilities of communication channels between people and authority, and people are offering resonable questions in approriate ways.
TS1
In a society with systems that allow it to enhance itselve through taking advices from its own people, and people who are trained to take good use of such systems,such claim is valid.
eg. in democratic countries have election system and legal system as the channels to reflect people’s disagreement and their citizen are trained to use these systems as early has in their childhood.
TS2
Without a democratic system, people questioning authority will have no use and even bring them publishment from the authority as revenge.
eg. totalitarianism countries people won’t be able to question authority freely.
TS3
Without proper citizen education about how to express their view constructively and lawfully, a great amount of people questioning their authority might lead to chaos.
eg. take thailand as example, in some newly established democratic countries, people’s expressing their opinions violently may lead to chaos that wanes the wellbeing of the society.
11) People's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
TS
Some of people's behavior are out of their own control, while some of it are surely the outcome of their own choice. Therefore, I only agree with the claim under certain conditions. Some of behaviors maybe determined by their physical conditions, influenced by the environment they live in, however, a great amount of behaviors reflects people's own will.
TS1
Some behaviors are determined by physical conditions, which can’t be of their own making
eg. certain eating habits based on people‘s allergic conditions
TS2
People’s manners, way of life, preference maybe determined by the environment they grow up in , parenting method, unconciously.
eg. according psychological theories, a lot of people’s behavior are formed by their childhood experiences which are mostly determined by their family of origin.
TS3
Even some of their behaviors shaped by other forces, to a great extent of their life, people are able to behave at their own volition.
eg. a lot of people who experienced emotional damage through their parents’ marriage failure would be able to maintain their own healthy relationship.作者: tesolchina 时间: 2015-5-7 18:36:35