寄托家园留学论坛

标题: N001_第七次作业 [打印本页]

作者: wgaggassi34    时间: 2007-4-29 13:10:06     标题: N001_第七次作业

第7次作业-5月5日22点前交,5月6日22点前改好,5月6日22点开始讨论作业.

1.作文题库185的154题(发到帖子上)
2.阅读:老托04年1月和03年10月(5月5日讨论,不用交答案)
3.听力:(DELTA)Page 213-231(不用交答案)
4.口语:(DELTA)Page 305-333(上传录音部分:Page 304 Exercise A-3,Page 306 Question 2,Page 320 Exercise 3.6C,Page326 Exercise 3.7A)
5.Longman:mini test 1(传小作文和口语,其余部分不用交答案)

前面(1个)改后面(2个),方案已经在队员重新调整后调整,不认真改作业的也将视为违规!
1-10,11
2-5,9
3-10,9
4-11,5

5-13,17
9-17,20
10-3,4

11-4,2
13-2,1
17-1,20
20-3,13


[ 本帖最后由 wgaggassi34 于 2007-5-7 09:05 编辑 ]
作者: zyechozy    时间: 2007-4-29 16:24:06

4-zyechozy
We used to meet smokers everywhere: in the streets, in shops, and even in restaurants.  Nowadays, some countries restrict people smoke in many public areas and office buildings.  Absolutely, it is a good rule.

In the first place, it is not a secret that smoking brings about negative impacts on our health. According to a recent survey, four million people die each year from disease linked to smoking. It is a common sense for us that smoking is responsible for many fatal diseases such as lung cancer, heart disease and the list will go on.  A research points that c cigarette smoking is associated with a dramatically increase inthe risk of dying from chronic obstructive lung disease. About 90% of all deaths from chronic obstructive lung disease are attributable to cigarette smoking.

Meanwhile, smoking in public areas and office buildings will inevitable pollute the air. It is not only the smoker himself suffers from illness caused by smoking, but people around him likely to injure by secondhand smoke as well. Secondhand smoke, also known as environmental tobacco smoke, contains at least 200 chemicals known to be toxic. Nonsmokers, especially children, the elders, and pregnant women, who are exposed to secondhand smoke at home or work increase their heart disease risk. In short, Smoking is unfair to those people who do not smoke.

In addition, smoking in public can give rise to serious social issues. For instance, in dry weather,a throwing cigarette end casually may start a fire. It not just causes heavy financial loss it also poses a grave threat to our lives. Anther adverse effect is that many young children may be curious to adult smokers who smoking in public. Although we all know that tobacco use in adolescence is more harmful to their development, they may set adult smokers as an example.

From what I have discussed above, I believe that it is beneficial for everyone if the government limit people smoke in the majority places in public.

*****************************************************************************
Longman Mini Test1小作文
The lecturer provides the additional specific information to strength the reading passage by presenting some examples.

The reading passage indicates that garlic is considered to have beneficial features and has been used from 3,000 B.C.  In Ancient Egypt, garlic was used as a medicine, curing 22 different kinds of ailments. Also, they use garlic to feed slaves to make slaves stronger and healthier.  The Greeks and Romans use garlic for more aspects such as warding off evil spells and curses, feeding to soldiers to make them more courageous.  Some seafaring cultures also use garlic to help sailors endure long voyages.  Even during World War 1, garlic was used to protect soldiers from infections.

To strengthen the points, the lecturer further discusses the history of garlic used and its medicinal benefits proved by scientists.  First, raw garlic kills twenty-three different kinds of bacteria. That explains the right use of garlic in World War 1. Second, heated garlic can reduce blood pressure effectively and fight against heart attack or stroke.

[ 本帖最后由 zyechozy 于 2007-5-4 13:57 编辑 ]
作者: nunu620    时间: 2007-4-29 16:44:25

占位子先,不过水平不是很好,大家表介意啊
According to the question, I agree that people shouldn’t be allowed to smoke in the public places and office building. I think it is a good rule for everyone to assure their rights. And most city of the world has a common decision about that and developed that decision successful
  It’s been a long time for people to start use cigarette to themselves comfortable. But since the 20th, many scientists found it’s really harmful to people who often smoke. Smoking is a cause for many diseases. People who smoke a lot will have 4 times possibilities to get cancer than who doesn’t. After that, many people decide to quit smoking. As we all know, to stop smoking is not that easy so not everyone can make it. Now in the world, there are still thousands of people are threaten by the dangerous of smoking.
  With the development of the science, more attention has been transferred to the area of the smoking. People found that second-smoking is much worse even than the one smoke himself. So many governments decided to forbid smoke in the public. It’s the best way to protect people’s rights who don’t smoke
Besides, we all know that the environment of the earth is big problem for us now. the smoke of  the cigarette has many harmful elements not just for man but also for the earth. So we shall try our best to make that policy implement.
Also, people need some forces to do the things sometime, especially the thing not that easy. It’s easy to start but difficult to persist to when a person want to quit smoking. So when they are in the public places, even they want to smoke but the policy don’t agree that and they have to stop that action. Several times later, they will found they have been slowly far away from the cigarettes and stop thinking about that and it’s a big and really important step for all that kind of person.


[ 本帖最后由 nunu620 于 2007-5-4 18:46 编辑 ]
作者: gnuliutingting    时间: 2007-4-29 17:20:57

Whether people should be allowed to smoke in many public places and office building is a hot and everlasting topic in many parts of the world. As for me, I strongly protest the behavior of smoking in public places and buildings because of the bad effects that cigarette smoking brings to us..First of all, as we all know, smoking is bad for smokers' health for the researchers have proved long ago that the nicotine it contains will greatly damage many parts of our organs including the lung and respiratory system and little by little it drag down their strong-built bodies until they come to the dying bed. There is even an equation to show us vividly the consequence of smoking, a cigarette a day may reduce 5 minutes of a human's life. However, once a youngster start to smoke at an early age for what ever reasons such as pressure, agony, ecstasy, immediately he or she will be addicted to it and to get rid of it may take all his or her life time if he or she is not firm enough to resist the temptation of cigarettes.On the second, smoking is public places and office building will unavoidably pollute the air which already is a mixture of many kinds of unpleasant odors. Furthermore, it has an even worse impact on the other's people's health, which is reluctant to be thrown into such a swirl without their permission. People who don't smoke while others do are often referred to passive smokers, will inhale more waste and toxic ingredients that the smokers exhale than the smoker itself. In addition, damages can't be revoked once they come to being because of the malfunction or disorder of the body.Besides, an unfinished butt may induce a catastrophe if we pay no attention to it in public places like crowded cinema, theater, chemical factory where smoking is not allowed. In the dry season in the Northeast of China, a huge fire caused numerous lost of our nation, including many kinds of invaluable trees and even some animals near extinction as well. We would never have chance to see them in person merely because of a butt.

Considering that it's hard to quit smoking once for all, we may forbid people smoking in public places and office building, and punish severely those who break the rule. At the same time, setting up some special places for smokers, then we can reduce smoking area gradually and eliminate smoking in the long run.


[ 本帖最后由 gnuliutingting 于 2007-5-7 15:38 编辑 ]
作者: woodman    时间: 2007-4-30 17:09:22     标题: 3-woodman第七次作文

154

We meet smokers everywhere, on street, in garden, on bus, even in school. And these smokers include not only the oldthe youthbut also middle school students, and even pregnant women. It was reported recently that smokers make up one quarter of the world population. As smoking is never a good thing, to forbid smoking in public places should be a wise rule.
      No smoking in public places contributes to protecting public health. Scientific research shows that smoking is not only a threat to smokers themselves, but also a threat to public, especially to women and children who are passive smokers. The poisonous gas issued from smoking is one of the major causes of cancer, pneumonia and heart attack. According to a study by the European Commission, passive smoking increases the risk of lung cancer and, as a result, leads to the death from the disease of an estimated 2000 non-smokers each year in European Union. What’s more, passive smoking, which is also a risk factor for acute and chronic respiratory disease, middle ear infection, and decreased lung function in infants, children, and adolescents, kills a further 20000 people annually in these countries.
      Moreover, forbidding people to smoke in public places can avoidfire. Most fatal fires are caused by smokers who improperly dispose of butts and ashes, resulting in killing and injuring their colleagues, friends and strangers and also millions of dollars in property damage. As garages and workshops containhighly flammable materials such as thinners, gas, paints and industrial cleaners,smoking there might be really dangerous. The same case is in office building or school. Paper products and wooden furniture there are also combustible, thus smoking would easily lead to a serious fire disaster.
      In addition, smoking ban in public places helpsmokers to quit the habit of smoking. Many smokers say that though they know smoking is harmful to their health and they have tried again and again to quit, it is really hard to persist. Perhaps it is not so effective to give up smoking merely relying on their willpower. With the ban on smoking in public places, smokers have to face the pressure of public opinion which might force them to smoke less. Also, it is not so convenient to go to a private area to smoke, thus they would be less likely to smoke.
      In sum, in many public places and officebuildings, smoking should be prohibited. This will greatly improve public health, reduce the occurrences of  fire disasters cause by smoking, and also do good to those who want to stop smoking.

LM综合写作
The reading passage talks about a change in curriculum made by the Sociology Department of State University, resulting in adding two more required courses and accordingly decreasing two elective courses instead of the original three require courses and five elective courses. The lecture is an announcement related to this new rule. The speaker thinks that the plan made in the passage may not be as effective as it is supposed to be.
      First, it is the university policy that department should not make any change to requirement after students have already started the program. The passage says that due to lack of expertise in some area, graduates from the Sociology Department are not well prepared for job. The best solution to this question is to change its curriculum by adding two more required courses. However, this plan disobeys the school policy. Thus, it is unfeasible.
      Second, the new rule can only go into effect on students who newly entered the program. The passage says that the change will affect all students in the department immediately. In fact, students who have already started the program will complain to school. Due to the school policy, they can graduate with the original requirement curriculum. That is to say, the new plan does not work a change on them.
       Third, since the department can’t force all students to follow its new rule, the department can only recommend its students to take the change curriculum rather than requiring them to do this. In other words, the department can merely encourage its students to take the two additional required courses.
口语作业已发邮箱。作业交全了。


[ 本帖最后由 woodman 于 2007-5-4 21:52 编辑 ]
作者: ily    时间: 2007-5-1 17:23:42     标题: 17_ily writing assignment for 154,

Nowadays, more countries regulate people smoking in public area, so many public places and office buildings are not permitted to smoke. It is definitely a good rule from my point of view. Actually, smoking is totally bad habit though some people take it as one way of relaxing.

    First of all, smoking will do harm to our health. This is not some secret, while common sense to all of us. Based on the statistics, one cigarette will shorten your life by 5 minutes. Smoking will induce cancer if you keep the habit for some period of time, the period of time is varied on different people. Lung cancer is common among those heavy smokers, followed by tongue cancer and throat cancer. When the addicts enjoy the 'relaxed' smoking time, they should realize that their health are encroached by the nicotine and other toxic chemicals gradually. Not only smokers themselves, other people who don't smoke around them will be impacted by the terrible smoke. Especially the elders, children, and pregnant women will be secondary victims if smoking in public areas is not banned.

    Secondly, smoking in public areas will bring some other bad issues. Unrestricted smoking will cause fire or other cataclysms. For instance, if the workers can smoke at anywhere in the factory, the butts they throw off casually probably induce fire accidents. The same cataclysms can also happen in elevators, or cinemas, the places usually crowded with people. Besides that, adults who smoke in public areas are bad models to our adolescents. Some young people even take that for fashion manner then follow it. If the adult smokers can control their smoking for the sake of health, those young, who are not
conscious what they are doing is to deteriorate their health, may have even more worse impact. It is not hard to imagine when the young reach to their 30-40 years old, they are struggling with cancers. It is not only the loss to themselve, their families, but also to our country, 30-40 is just the age people work at their peak of their carrer life.        


    If people are permitted to smoke only in some specific public areas, this regulation maybe reduce the frequency of their smoking, and in some degree postpone the time point for they get cancer. Another direct advantage of the regulation is, other people around smokers will not suffer the smoke in most cases. So I suggest smokers have their restricted areas even in private spaces, such as home, for their family members have the rights to protect their health. In short, requiring people not to smoke is impossible, what we can do is to reduce the impact of smoking to the minimum. Restricting people to smoke in many public areas seems to be the best way, now.
作者: ily    时间: 2007-5-1 17:24:37     标题: 这个帖子都被淹没了。

建议版主是不是应该清清版面了啊。sigh,找了好几页。
作者: woodman    时间: 2007-5-1 19:46:17     标题: 回复 #7 ily 的帖子

告诉你快捷方式:点击主题活动,呵呵,在第一面就能找到我们组的作业贴啦
作者: rzbrzb    时间: 2007-5-4 00:22:14     标题: 11-king~~~

This is good or bad rule to not allowed smoking in public places

In my opinion, this is obviously a good rule to not allowed smoking in public place although smoking people may not think so. If you smoking in public, other people may not tend to tell you they hate that, but this isn’t mean they like the environment surrounding with smoke.

First of all, smoking is bad for your healthy, you shouldn’t smoke whatever. We hear people telling the smoking people all the time that your lung will be used to do the medical research, but few people care about it. You may have no idea how serious it is, but I’ve saw the sample before when I take the biology class. All the lung had became black and bad, I even couldn’t recognize it’s a lung of Hume being! It’s more like a cooked liver of pig. The vision scars me so much that I can recall it vividly even today. So please believe me smoking is killing you, and it’s a chronic suicide.

Moreover, smoking in the public place is more likely you are chronically killing the people surround you without their notice or permission. For instance, if you smoke in an office, your colleges have no choice but accept the fact of breathing the harmful air. It’s unfair to others because they have the right to enjoy their working environment instead of getting sicker and sicker. And you can’t earn respect from people who can’t tolerant your behavior and conflict may commence. So as a high quality person in nowadays society, you should care about what other people judge you and forbid yourself smoking in public place even there’s no rules.

It seems clear that having rules of no smoking in public place is a good idea. It will keep yours and others healthy and reduce conflict. I believe will bring us a batter environment and benefit all of us.

[ 本帖最后由 rzbrzb 于 2007-5-4 00:25 编辑 ]
作者: 小龙团茶    时间: 2007-5-4 10:35:31     标题: 7-20

The answer of this statement depends on your own experience and life style. In my point view, smoking in public places is very important. So it is sagacious to support the good rule.         Among countless factors which influence the choice, these are three are conspicous aspects as follows.
  The main reason for my propensity for it is not good for our healty. There are a vast number of illnesses caused by cigarette smoke. Cigarettes can cause lung cancer and therefor smokers inlulge in cigarettes. Each year many lives will be taken away by smoking. How many families will lose their members? Well, not only cancer but also heart disease will be brought by smoking. Moreover,  some disease is visible such as yellow teeth and hands. These give people bad appearance. Although people who smoke directly will harm themselves, the scientist said people who smoke indirectly would be wores, especially the children and pregant women. It is called the second cigarette.  
Another reason can be seen by every pesron is that smoking in public places wil destroy company`s impression. For example, if the company allow staff to smoke freely, you can see the smoke everywhere. It must give us a impression that the air is not fresh. If people can not breath the fresh air, they can not work effectively and complet the assigment very well. It also ruin the envinoment. So the benefit of the company will increase. It is not good to the company if another  company who want to cooperate with the smoky company once they come into the office. They may turn about the office. It can be thought the work attitude is not serious and earnest.
Futhermore, forbiding smoking will help smokers not smole so often. If it is not allowes to smoke in public places, smokers must find some places that there are no one. So they can smoke in person. It must make smokers feel trouble and not comfortable. So they have to decrease the times of smoking. It is not only good to smokers but also to other people who do not smoke. So it is very important.
In short, I think this is a good rule that no longer allow to smoke in publio places, for the people`s health, and the benefit of company. It is signality to the society. I beilieve we can do it!
作者: zyechozy    时间: 2007-5-4 11:05:03     标题: 作业批改~

1-6,8
2-8,9
3-9,10
4-10,11
5-11,14
6-14,17
8-17,19
9-19,20
10-20,1
11-1,2
14-2,3
17-3,4
19-4,5
20-5,6
作者: wgaggassi34    时间: 2007-5-4 22:19:20

1_7
It has been a controversial debute whether smoking should be allowed in the public places or office buildings since many

years ago. Some people oppose this rule while others strongly support it. In my opinion, I consider this rule as a benefit to

the society.

First of all, this rule will guarantee a better environment to the people without any smoke around. If there is no such rule,

smokers will enjoy their smoking in the public places without considering the sense of the others who around them. They will

obviously pollute the environment with the smoking gas which is composed of many harmful stuff, and the nonsmokers around

will respire the dirty air which will take them many problems. However, if the rule is put into effect, it will definitely

purify the air, and since there will be no sources that produce smoking gas in the public, the environment will be more

favorable to people's health.

Moreover, this rule can save the smoker's a huge amount of money. For most of the serious smokers, smoking will cost them

lots of money every month. If there is a way that can restrict the times of smoking, smokers must be glad when considering

the cost of the smoking. The rule is just the way that can ban the smoking in the public or office buildings. Smoking may

take the smokers many problems. First, it will take them much money. then with the loss of the money, smokers will worry

about the living condition of their family. Finally, they will get many stress that caused by the smoking. It seems a vicious

circle.

Further more, this rule will guarantee the smokers to provide better performance. If the smokers are allowed to smoke in the

working place, it will bring a serious problem. The smokers will always smoke when they are dealing with the work, and they

will pay less attention to their assignments. Thus,the efficiency of the smokers will finally be at a low level. What is the

result for a company if all the employees are serious smokers? So the rule can bring the smokers a more efficient

performance, and can eventually result  more profits to the company.

In conclusion,it is a favorable policy that it will not only win the support of the nonsmokers but also do not receive hinder

from the smokers. I really appreciate the rule applied in my country.
作者: wallace_jim    时间: 2007-5-5 20:45:09     标题: 154题

Euphoria of smoking cigarette is pushing you one step closer to the edge of death. From statistic evidence, the death rate of cigarette addicts is much higher than average level, in addition a vast number of illness are caused by smoking. So from a physical perspective, prohibit people smoking in public places and office buildings are definitely a good rule that is not only beneficial for people around but also for themselves.

First, smoking deteriorate people's health is accepted by public. Unfortunately, to most addicts, this opinion is too common for them to realize the horrible consequences-if they continue to addict in smoking and consume more than 20 pieces of cigarette daily even though each pack of cigarette says smoking is dangerous to your health. So at this situation, do more advertises to make sure people realize that the more they smoke, more chances they would suffer lung diseases even lose their lives and implement rules to prohibit people in public places and office buildings are highly necessary. I have read an experiment in book, the amount of nicotine in 20 pieces of cigarette could kill a piece of cattle. Though to smokers, most noxious substances release in the air when they exhale. To non-smoking people working in a smoky room, they would be suffered more than smoking people.

Furthermore, the cigarette stubs are usually found as the cause of fire. Many smokers haven't made sure the stub of cigarette is put out and some of them just throw stubs where they please, this become worse when it happens in forest. So prohibit people smoking in public places could avoid some fire accidents.
作者: wallace_jim    时间: 2007-5-5 20:46:34     标题: 154题 wallace

Euphoria of smoking cigarette is pushing you one step closer to the edge of death. From statistic evidence, the death rate of cigarette addicts is much higher than average level, in addition a vast number of illness are caused by smoking. So from a physical perspective, prohibit people smoking in public places and office buildings are definitely a good rule that is not only beneficial for people around but also for themselves.

First, smoking deteriorate people's health is accepted by public. Unfortunately, to most addicts, this opinion is too common for them to realize the horrible consequences-if they continue to addict in smoking and consume more than 20 pieces of cigarette daily even though each pack of cigarette says smoking is dangerous to your health. So at this situation, do more advertises to make sure people realize that the more they smoke, more chances they would suffer lung diseases even lose their lives and implement rules to prohibit people in public places and office buildings are highly necessary. I have read an experiment in book, the amount of nicotine in 20 pieces of cigarette could kill a piece of cattle. Though to smokers, most noxious substances release in the air when they exhale. To non-smoking people working in a smoky room, they would be suffered more than smoking people.

Furthermore, the cigarette stubs are usually found as the cause of fire. Many smokers haven't made sure the stub of cigarette is put out and some of them just throw stubs where they please, this become worse when it happens in forest. So prohibit people smoking in public places could avoid some fire accidents.

In a weird way, advertises in public to ask people not smoke in public places would become advertisement for manufactures of cigarette. But considering beneficial strength the existing weakness could cover the lost in many ways, consequently, the superiority in its process of practical adopting is hence guaranteed.
作者: wgaggassi34    时间: 2007-5-5 21:44:55

LM_writing
In the reading passage, I know that garlic was once very useful.The lecture give two pieces of support reasons why it has such function.

First of all, the garlic can kill bacteria.Reseach tells that garlic is effective in killing bacteria, some garlic can even kill as many as 23 types of bacteria. So it is no surprising that Ancient Egyptian used it as a medicine. It really had the ability to kill some kinds of ailments.And in the 20th century,, people used it to fight infections and even as a useful thing given to soldiers’ food. It really worked in the war.

Besides, it can heat the blood, then boosts the blood pressure. For this function, people in the past thought it must have magic powers that could give people courage and take the evil spells away. Hence, soldiers used it in order to gain more energy and encourage.

In a word, garlic can not only kill the bacteria, but also increase people’s blood pressure, so it was considered a useful materia and was widely used worldwide in the past.
作者: wgaggassi34    时间: 2007-5-5 21:47:10

3号MM
MS你的小作文写错了
我也刚看到~

原帖由 woodman 于 2007-4-30 17:09 发表
154We meet smokers everywhere, on street, in garden, on bus, even in school. And these smokers include not only the old,the youth,but also middle school students, and even pregnant women. It wa ...

作者: gnuliutingting    时间: 2007-5-6 13:00:42

2号改4号

We used to meet smokers everywhere: in the (去掉)streets, in shops, and even in restaurants.  Nowadays, some countries restrict people smoke in many public areas and office buildings.  Absolutely, it is a good rule.有点唐突,增加一些内容会好一些。

In the first place, it is not a secret that smoking brings about negative impacts on our health. According to a recent survey, four million people die each year from disease linked to smoking. It is a common sense for us that smoking is responsible for many fatal diseases such as lung cancer, heart disease and the list will go on.  A research points that c cigarette smoking is associated with a dramatically increase in
the risk of dying from (of 比较好)chronic obstructive lung disease. About 90% of all deaths from chronic obstructive lung disease are attributable to cigarette smoking.

Meanwhile, smoking in public areas and office buildings will inevitable pollute the air. It is not only the smoker himself suffers from illness caused by smoking, but people around him likely to injure (be injured)by secondhand smoke as well(前面有了not only, but 此处略显多余). Secondhand smoke, also known as environmental tobacco smoke, contains at least 200 chemicals known to be toxic. Nonsmokers, especially children, the elders, and pregnant women, who are exposed to secondhand smoke at home or work increase their heart disease risk. In short, Smoking is unfair to those people who do not smoke. 后面的部分非常连贯,语言地道。

In addition, smoking in public can give rise to serious social issues. For instance, in dry weather,a throwing cigarette end casually may start a fire. It not(only不可省略) just causes heavy financial loss it also poses a grave threat to our lives. Anther adverse effect is that many young children may be curious to (about)adult smokers who smoking in public. Although we all know that tobacco use in adolescence is more harmful to their development, they may set adult smokers as an example.

From what I have discussed above, I believe that it is beneficial for everyone if the government limit people smoke in the majority places in public.

总体语言流畅,一些地道说法值得学习。Secondhand smoke, cigarette smoking,cigarette end等等。

[ 本帖最后由 gnuliutingting 于 2007-5-7 12:17 编辑 ]
作者: wgaggassi34    时间: 2007-5-7 09:05:42

前面(1个)改后面(2个),方案已经在队员重新调整后调整,不认真改作业的也将视为违规!
1-10,11
2-5,9
3-10,9
4-11,5
5-13,17
9-17,20
10-3,4
11-4,2
13-2,1
17-1,20
20-3,13
请大家在今天晚上10点前改好作业!
作者: wgaggassi34    时间: 2007-5-7 09:20:33

Nowadays, more countries regulate people smoking in public area, so many public places and office buildings are not permitted to smoke. It is definitely a good rule from my point of view. Actually, smoking is totally a bad habit though some people take it as one way of relaxing.

    First of all, smoking will do harm to our health. This is not some secret, while common sense to all of us. Based on the statistics, one cigarette will shorten your life by 5 minutes. Smoking will induce cancer if you keep the habit for some period of time, the period of time is varied on different people. Lung cancer is common among those heavy smokers, followed by tongue cancer and throat cancer. When the addicts enjoy the 'relaxed' smoking time, they should realize that their health are encroached by the nicotine and other toxic chemicals gradually. Not only smokers themselves, other(but also更合适一点) people who don't smoke around them will be impacted by the terrible smoke. Especially the elders, children, and pregnant women will be secondary victims if smoking in public areas is not banned.

    Secondly, smoking in public areas will bring some other bad issues. Unrestricted smoking will cause fire or other cataclysms. For instance, if the workers can smoke at anywhere in the factory, the butts they throw off casually probably induce fire accidents. The same cataclysms can also happen in elevators, or cinemas, the places usually crowded with people. Besides that, adults who smoke in public areas are bad models to our adolescents. Some young people even take that for fashion manner then follow it. If the adult smokers can control their smoking for the sake of health, those young, who are not
conscious what they are doing is to deteriorate their health, may have even more worse impact. It is not hard to imagine when the young reach to their 30-40 years old, they are struggling with cancers. It is not only the loss to themselve, their families, but also to our country, 30-40 is just the age people work at their peak of their carrer life.        


    If people are permitted to smoke only in some specific public areas, this regulation maybe reduce the frequency of their smoking, and in some degree postpone the time point for they get cancer. Another direct advantage of the regulation is, other people around smokers will not suffer the smoke in most cases. So I suggest smokers have their restricted areas even in private spaces, such as home, for their family members have the rights to protect their health. In short, requiring people not to smoke is impossible, what we can do is to reduce the impact of smoking to the minimum. Restricting people to smoke in many public areas seems(最后总结了,还用seems,看起来好象不是很坚定.) to be the best way, now.


写的太好了,又看到了17号队员的实力。加精!
作者: wgaggassi34    时间: 2007-5-7 09:21:29

改11号

In my opinion, this is obviously a good rule to not allowed(allowing) smoking in public place although smoking people may not think so. If you smoking in public, other people may not tend to tell you they hate that, but this isn’t mean they like the environment surrounding with smoke.

First of all, smoking is bad for your healthy, you shouldn’t smoke whatever. We hear people telling the smoking people all the time that your lung will be used to do the medical research, but few people care about it. You may have no idea how serious it is, but I’ve saw the sample before when I take the biology class. All the lung had became black and bad, I even couldn’t recognize it’s a lung of Hume(human) being! It’s more like a cooked liver of pig. The vision scars(scares) me so much that I can recall it vividly even today. So please believe me(句型有问题,去掉me) smoking is killing you, and it’s a chronic suicide.

Moreover, smoking in the public place is more likely you are chronically killing the people surround you without their notice or permission. For instance, if you smoke in an office, your colleges have no choice but accept the fact of breathing the harmful air. It’s unfair to others because they have the right to enjoy their working environment instead of getting sicker and sicker(没表达清楚,instead of前后应该是一致的). And you can’t earn respect from people who can’t tolerant your behavior and conflict may commence(?happen). So as a high quality person in nowadays society, you should care about what other people judge you and forbid yourself smoking in public place even there’s no rules.

It seems clear that having rules of no smoking in public place is a good idea. It will keep yours and others healthy and reduce conflict. I believe ( believe宾语是什么?) will bring us a batter(better) environment and benefit all of us.

语法错误还是比较多的,很多句型值得探讨.多看看精华作业,应该对你有帮助!

[ 本帖最后由 wgaggassi34 于 2007-5-7 13:56 编辑 ]
作者: wgaggassi34    时间: 2007-5-7 09:33:20

The answer of this statement depends on your own experience and life style. In my point view(重复了), smoking in public places is very important(?和你后面的论证怎么相反了). So it is sagacious to support the good rule.         Among countless factors which influence the choice, these are three are conspicous aspects as follows(句型错误,2个动词).
The main reason for my propensity for(for后面最好不要接句子) it is not good for our healty. There are a vast number of illnesses caused by cigarette smoke. Cigarettes can cause lung cancer and therefor(therefore) smokers inlulge in cigarettes. Each year many lives will be taken away by smoking. How many families will lose their members? Well, not only cancer but also heart disease will be brought by smoking. Moreover,  some disease is visible such as yellow teeth and hands. These give people bad appearance. Although people who smoke directly will harm themselves, the scientist said people who smoke indirectly would be wores(worse), especially the children and pregant women. It is called the second cigarette(second hand cigarette).  
Another reason can be seen by every pesron is that smoking in public places wil destroy company`s impression(image?). For example, if the company allow staff to smoke freely, you can see the smoke everywhere. It must give us a impression that the air is not fresh. If people can not breath the fresh air, they can not work effectively and complet the assigment very well. It also ruin the envinoment. So the benefit of the company will increase. It is not good to the company if another  company who want to cooperate with the smoky company once they come into the office. They may turn about the office(?turn about office?什么意思). It can be thought the work attitude is not serious and earnest.
Futhermore, forbiding smoking will help smokers not smole(smoke) so often. If it is not allowes to smoke in public places, smokers must find some places that there are no one(?想表达什么?). So they can smoke in person. It must make smokers feel trouble and not comfortable. So they have to decrease the times of smoking. It is not only good to smokers but also to other people who do not smoke. So it is very important.
In short, I think this is a good rule that no longer allow to smoke in publio(public) places, for the(去掉the) people`s health, and the benefit of company. It is signality(?) to the society. I beilieve we can do it!

还有很多地方值得改进,语法,词汇量也不够大,总的来说比刚开始有进步!

[ 本帖最后由 wgaggassi34 于 2007-5-7 09:44 编辑 ]
作者: woodman    时间: 2007-5-7 09:51:57     标题: 作业完成情况----woodman统计

表扬13号,最近2次作业很认真。
表扬1号,坚持完成口语作业,你曾说过放弃口语,为了给大家带头,最终坚持了。谢谢你的坚持给小组带来的示范作用,表扬一个,感动ing~
批评一下11号,3次未交口语了。希望以后严格要求自己。
批评一下6号,一直觉得你表现不俗,坚持的不够好哦,要加油。
各位队员要继续努力,向1号和13号学习,如果下次你们表现好,我也会在统计贴里予以表扬的哦!坚持就是胜利!最后的1个多月,全力以赴!

第七次:8个人交了作业(1,2,3,4,11,13,17,20号),5,9,10号请假(最后一次请假机会)
1号,3号,13号交全了作业,2号、17号缺小作文和LM口语;20号缺小作文,LM口语,delta口语缺第4题;4号缺LM口语;11号缺小作文和口语。

第六次:10个人交了作业(1,2,3,4,6,10,11,13,17,20)9号迟到且至今欠口语
2,3,10,13,17,20号交全了作业。
1,4,6,9,11号缺口语。

第五次完成作业情况比较好的是3,4,5,6,9,10,20号。1,2,8号欠口语作业。11号欠作文。13,14,17,18,19号任何作业都没交。
第四次作业完成情况:8号,10号,11号,14号缺口语。19号口语作文都没交。其余人均按时完成了作业。
第三次作业完成情况: 2号,4号,18号没交(请假),20号缺作文。
第二次作业完成情况:1,8,10,20号欠口语,17号欠作文口语。

[ 本帖最后由 woodman 于 2007-5-7 10:02 编辑 ]
作者: wgaggassi34    时间: 2007-5-7 10:22:24

改17号
1.令你惊讶的事:说的相当出色,观点表达很清晰,语法,句型都很多变!希望大家能听一下.
2.1次长考试还是多次小考试的问题:说的很清楚,分3点表述.但可能第三次有点勉强.总体很好.
3.Social role:可能你结合你的实际的那几句话是没有必要的,这一题只要求你能够把听力的东西表达完整!
4.说的非常好!完整表达了对话的内容,而且还运用了好多过渡词汇.不过中间那句the second way感觉有点怪,还有几个动词时态错误.还有一句have same academic major可能不是很恰当,是否可以换成in the same major?

建议:17号口语很出色,请仔细把OG看一遍,应该会收获很多考试的答题要点,帮助你冲击高分!我们都要向你学习,特别是我!:handshake
作者: zyechozy    时间: 2007-5-7 11:16:20     标题: 4号对11号作业的修改

This is good or bad rule to not allowed smoking in public places//开头太简单
In my opinion, this is obviously a good rule to not allowed smoking in public place although
smoking peoplesmokers may not think so. If you smoking(smoke) in public, other people may not tend to tell you they hate that, but this isn’t(doesn’t ) mean they like the environment surrounding(去掉) with smoke.

First of all, smoking is bad for your
healthyhealth, you shouldn’t smoke whatever(没完,比如改成whatever you do). We hear people telling the smoking peoplesmokers(这个句子不是很好,比如改成Smokers are told…) all the time that your(根据前面改的这里就要换成their) lung will be used to do the medical research, but few people care about it. //前面那句话是要说什么?抽烟者的肺要被拿去做药理研究,但是没人在意这些?有点怕怕You may have no idea how serious it is, but I’ve saw the sample before when I take the biology class. All the lung had became black and bad, I even couldn’t recognize it’s a lung of human being! It’s more like a cooked liver of a pig. The vision scars(scarsed) me so much that I can recall it vividly even today. So please believe me smoking is killing you, and it’s a chronic suicide.

Moreover, smoking in the public place is more likely you are chronically killing the people surround you without their notice or permission. For instance, if you smoke in an office, your
colleges (colleagues)have no choice but accept the fact of breathing the harmful air. It’s unfair to others because they have the right to enjoy their working environment instead of getting sicker and sicker. And you can’t earn respect from people who can’t tolerant your behavior and conflict may commence. So as a high quality person in nowadays society, you should care about what other people judge you and forbid yourself smoking in public place even there’s no rules.//这句不错

It seems clear that having rules of no smoking in public place is a good idea. It will keep yours and others healthy and reduce conflict. I believe will bring us a batter environment and benefit all of us.



建议:

1              不要全文用youyour…或许应该用people, the public, smokers etc.

2              开头太单薄,呵呵,自己都有感觉吧?常用开头还是要写点撒~

3              First of all 那段问题有点多,其他的还没什么

4       多背点好的句子

5              口语口语……




[ 本帖最后由 zyechozy 于 2007-5-7 11:25 编辑 ]
作者: gnuliutingting    时间: 2007-5-7 12:16:53

2号改17号

Nowadays, more(and more 或者many) countries regulate people smoking in public area, so many public places and office buildings are not permitted to smoke. It is definitely a good rule from my point of view. Actually, smoking is totally bad habit though some people take it as one way of relaxing.

    First of all, smoking will do harm to our health. This is not some secret, while common sense to all of us. Based on the statistics, one cigarette will shorten your life by 5 minutes. Smoking will induce cancer if you keep the habit for some period of time, the period of time is varied on different people. Lung cancer is common among those heavy smokers, followed by tongue cancer and throat cancer. When the addicts enjoy the 'relaxed' smoking time, they should realize that their health are encroached by the nicotine and other toxic chemicals gradually. Not only smokers themselves, other people who don't smoke around them will be impacted by the terrible smoke. Especially the elders, children, and pregnant women will be secondary victims if smoking in public areas is not banned.

    Secondly, smoking in public areas will bring some other bad issues. Unrestricted smoking will cause fire or other cataclysms. For instance, if the workers can smoke at anywhere in the factory, the butts they throw off casually probably induce fire accidents. The same cataclysms can also happen in elevators, or cinemas, the places usually crowded with people. Besides that, adults who smoke in public areas are bad models to our adolescents. Some young people even take that for fashion manner then follow it. If the adult smokers can control their smoking for the sake of health, those young, who are not
conscious what they are doing is to deteriorate their health, may have even more worse impact(这句话很长,但是我认为前面应该是否定的。如果成年人能够控制他们的吸烟行为,年轻人可能受到更大的影响). It is not hard to imagine when the young reach to their 30-40 years old, they are struggling with cancers. It is not only the loss to themselve, their families, but also to our country, 30-40 is just the age people work at their peak of their carrer life.        


    If people are permitted to smoke only in some specific public areas, this regulation maybe reduce the frequency of their smoking, and in some degree postpone the time point for they get cancer. Another direct advantage of the regulation is, other people around smokers will not suffer the smoke in most cases. So I suggest smokers have their restricted areas even in private spaces, such as home, for their family members have the rights to protect their health. In short, requiring people not to smoke is impossible, what we can do is to reduce the impact of smoking to the minimum. Restricting people to smoke in many public areas seems to be the best way, now.




语言流畅,逻辑清晰。好文~




作者: wallace_jim    时间: 2007-5-7 13:37:01

13号改2号口语
3.4A 3
这道题你用了太多时间去说上海虹口机场碰见朋友几率小,更应该重点说的是你与你朋友碰面的场景和细节
306.2.1
此题在说明两点理由时有重复且两点理由的区分不太明显
320.2
首先是有两个词的发音,有一次的role发成了real,employer发成了employee
在解释role conflict时可能是没听清听力所以感觉上是自己的总结,但还是说清楚了。后面的例子都说得不错
314.2做错题了,应该是326页的on-campus housing
作者: wallace_jim    时间: 2007-5-7 13:37:39

13号改1号口语
首先想说的是你在录口语时,应该发音大声点,有些词都听不清。听上去像很害羞的样子,要表现出你的自信
Delta
第一题
题材和细节上的支持都不错,就是声音要放大
第二题
原因太少只说出了一个,口语真的还要好好的加油
第三题
mature adult的细节没听到,其它的还可以
第四题
在前面陈述woman的观点时浪费了时间而使得回答不完整
Longman
第一题
这道题我觉得只说你要做的一项措施就可以了。而你在开始说你有many things to do,结果又只说到了两个。措施的具体
实施细节没有提到
第二题
这题你好象是完全听错了,woman对作业是持肯定态度,man对此表示不同意。
第三题
这道题回答挺不错的。就是不够流利
作者: wgaggassi34    时间: 2007-5-7 13:57:38

改4-zyechozy

We used to meet smokers everywhere: in the streets, in shops, and even in restaurants.  Nowadays, some countries restrict people smoke in many public areas and office buildings.  Absolutely, it is a good rule.

In the first place, it is not a secret that smoking brings about negative impacts on(to) our health. According to a recent survey, four million people die each year from disease linked to smoking. It is a common sense for us that smoking is responsible for many fatal diseases such as lung cancer, heart disease and the list will go on.  A research points  out that c cigarette smoking is associated with a dramatically increase inthe risk of dying from chronic obstructive lung disease. About 90% of all deaths from chronic obstructive lung disease are attributable to cigarette smoking.

Meanwhile, smoking in public areas and office buildings will inevitable pollute the air. It is not only the smoker himself suffers from illness caused by smoking, but people around him likely to injure by secondhand smoke as well. Secondhand smoke, also known as environmental tobacco smoke, contains at least 200 chemicals known to be toxic. Nonsmokers, especially children, the elders, and pregnant women, who are exposed to secondhand smoke at home or work increase their heart disease risk. In short, Smoking is unfair to those people who do not smoke.

In addition, smoking in public can give rise to serious social issues. For instance, in dry weather,a throwing cigarette end(香烟头这样说恰当吗?是不是cigarette mouth?) casually may start a fire. It not just causes heavy financial loss it(多余,改成but) also poses a grave(grave很传神) threat to our lives. Anther adverse effect is that many young children may be curious to adult smokers who smoking in public. Although we all know that tobacco use in adolescence is more harmful to their development, they may set adult smokers as an example.

From what I have discussed above, I believe that it is beneficial for everyone if the government limit people smoke in the majority places in public.

建议:总体来说很不错.观点陈述都很到位,并且有一些词用的很好。但感觉和17号还有那么一点点的差距,我就是说不出来,你把你的文章和她的对比一下,或许能发现自己的不足.帮你加精!

[ 本帖最后由 wgaggassi34 于 2007-5-7 14:07 编辑 ]
作者: wgaggassi34    时间: 2007-5-7 14:08:38

改2号

Whether people should be allowed to smoke in many public places and office building is a hot and everlasting topic in many parts of the world. As for me, I strongly protest the behavior of smoking in public places and buildings meanwhile I respect the smoker's habit and rights.

First of all, as we all know, smoking is bad for smokers' health for the researchers have proved long ago that the nicotine it contains will greatly damage many parts of our organs including the lung and respiratory system and little by little it drag down their strong-built bodies until they come to the dying bed. There is even an equation to show us vividly the consequence of smoking, a cigarette a day may reduce 5 minutes of a human's life. However, once a youngster start to smoke at an early age for what ever reasons such as pressure, agony, ecstasy, immediately he or she will be addicted to it and to get rid of it may take all his or her life time if he or she is not firm enough to resist the temptation of cigarettes.

On the second, smoking is public places and office building will unavoidably pollute the air which already is a mixture of many kinds of unpleasant odors. Furthermore, it has an even worse impact on the other's people's health, which is reluctant to be thrown into such a swirl without their permission. People who don't smoke while others do are often referred to passive smokers, will inhale more waste and toxic ingredients that the smokers exhale than the smoker itself. In addition, damages can't be revoked once they come to being because of the malfunction or disorder of the body.

The smokers may refute that their rights are deprived of and how could they do when found discomfort both mentally and physically? As a matter of fact, many parts of world have set an example for us that is to respect the smokers and non-smoking people at the same time, we can separate a special area for smokers while smoking in other places will be severely punished. In this way, both the smokers and non-smokers can come to a satisfactory answer.

Although smoking does us no good, considering that it's hard to quit smoking once for all, we may forbid people smoking in public places and office building gradually. Then setting up some special places for smokers is a better solution to meet people's needs, reducing smoking area and eliminate smoking in the long run.

建议:读了这篇文章,我就有种晕晕的感觉.虽然每段都有很清晰的观点,但直到最后,我也没搞清楚你的立场.建议托福写作不要像G那样,毕竟出发点不同.为了保险起见,我觉得你的立场可以坚定些~
  可以请教其他队员,看看他们的意见!

[ 本帖最后由 wgaggassi34 于 2007-5-7 14:21 编辑 ]
作者: wgaggassi34    时间: 2007-5-7 14:22:05

改3-woodman第七次作文

We meet smokers everywhere, on street, in garden, on bus, even in school. And these smokers include not only the old,the youth,but also middle school students, and even pregnant women. It was reported recently that smokers make up one quarter of the world population. As smoking is never a good thing, to forbid smoking in public places should be a wise rule.

      No smoking in public places contributes to protecting public health. Scientific research shows that smoking is not only a threat to smokers themselves, but also a threat to public, especially to women and children who are passive smokers. The poisonous gas issued from smoking is one of the major causes of cancer, pneumonia and heart attack. According to a study by the European Commission, passive smoking increases the risk of lung cancer and, as a result, leads to the death from the disease of an estimated 2000 non-smokers each year in European Union. What’s more, passive smoking, which is also a risk factor for acute and chronic respiratory disease, middle ear infection, and decreased lung function in infants, children, and adolescents, kills a further 20000 people annually in these countries.(这个句子太好了,学习!)

      Moreover, forbidding people to smoke in public places can avoidfire. Most fatal fires are caused by smokers who improperly dispose of butts(好词,刚才我还用了cigarette mouth呢) and ashes, resulting in killing and injuring their colleagues, friends and strangers and also millions of dollars in property damage. As garages and workshops containhighly flammable materials such as thinners, gas, paints and industrial cleaners,smoking there might be really dangerous. The same case is in office building or school. Paper products and wooden furniture there are also combustible, thus smoking would easily lead to a serious fire disaster.

      In addition, smoking ban in public places help(helps) smokers to quit the habit of smoking. Many smokers say that though they know smoking is harmful to their health and they have tried again and again to quit, it is really hard to persist. Perhaps it is not so effective to give up smoking merely relying on their willpower. With the ban on smoking in public places, smokers have to face the pressure of public opinion which might force them to smoke less. Also, it is not so convenient to go to a private area to smoke, thus they would be less likely to smoke.

      In sum, in many public places and officebuildings, smoking should be prohibited. This will greatly improve public health, reduce the occurrences of  fire disasters cause by smoking, and also do good to those who want to stop smoking.

建议:好文章!思路很清晰.用词很好,句型也很多变!3号的列举实在强啊,要多多学习.加精!我看不出来有什么需要改进的地方,不好意思~

[ 本帖最后由 wgaggassi34 于 2007-5-7 14:39 编辑 ]
作者: gnuliutingting    时间: 2007-5-7 15:06:42

原帖由 wallace_jim 于 2007-5-7 13:37 发表
13号改2号口语
3.4A 3
这道题你用了太多时间去说上海虹口机场碰见朋友几率小,更应该重点说的是你与你朋友碰面的场景和细节
306.2.1
此题在说明两点理由时有重复且两点理由的区分不太明显
320.2
首先是有 ...



谢谢宝贵意见,后面把employer 和employee搞混了,忘记employer是老板了。我有一句This is real conflit.真正的冲突啊,用在这里不知道和不合适,还是改为role conflict.

总结归纳题还不太会回答,信息太多了,既有文字又有对话,内容太多。
应该条理化。

suprised这一题不好答,想不出来什么内容。

感谢你这么认真,仔细的修改。作文的问题我也发现了,总是想面面俱到,反而给人的感觉不好。我修改一下,马上发过来。
作者: woodman    时间: 2007-5-7 16:18:41     标题: 3号改11号

In myopinion, this is obviously a good rule to not allowed smoking in public placealthough smoking people may not think so. If yousmoking in public, other people may not tend to tell you they hate that, butthis isn’t mean they like the environment surrounding with smoke.这句话放这里有点不知所云了,与主旨关联不大。

开头要有一个引论做铺垫,引入你要论证的话题。开门见山的,感觉难以拿高分。
First of all, smoking is bad for your healthy, you shouldn’t(尽量避免缩写)smoke whateverat all placeswhatever无论什么的意思,是不是放这不妥呀?. We hearpeople tellingcomplaining the smokingpeople all the time that your lung will be used(need)to do the medical research(docimasia检查), but fewpeople care about it. You may have no idea how serious it is, but I’ve saw thesample before when I taketookthe biologyclass. All the(The whole) lung had became(been) black and bad, I even couldn’t recognizeit’s a lung of Hume being! It’s more like a cooked liver of pig. The visionscars me so much that I can recall it vividly even today. So please believe mesmoking is killing you, and it’s a chronic suicide.
你举的例子不够严谨,有点散乱的感觉
Moreover, smoking in the去掉 public placeis more likely you are chronically killing theto killpeople surround you without their(去掉) notice orpermission. For instance, if you smoke in an office, your colleges have nochoice but accept the fact of breathing the harmful air. It’s unfair to othersbecause they have the right to enjoy their working environment instead ofgetting sicker and sicker. And you can’t earn respect from people who can’ttolerant your behavior and conflict may commence. So as a high quality personin nowadays society, you should care about what other people judge you andforbid yourself smoking in public place even there’s no rules.

这一段观点新颖,赞一下。建议再展开一下。
It seems seems语气太弱,用isclear thathaving rules of no smoking in public place is a good idea. It will keep yours you and othershealthy and reduce conflict. I believe this willbring us a batterbetterenvironmentand benefit all of us.

建议:1、开头做点铺垫工作
      2、分论点最好3
      3、不要用太多youyour,不严谨
      4、字数要保证300+
      5、加强作文练习,可以背点材料,比如李笑来的,在李笑来范文的基础上改写5~6篇作文,看看效果,然后尝试自己写。一定要坚持每天都写,对于你目前的状况来说,只能这样了。
要加油哦!不要灰心,只要努力,一定会有进步的。我第一次录口语时,我周围的同学拍砖拍得我想找个地洞钻了,呵呵,但是我坚持了下来,虽然现在还是很烂,但我看到了进步。也许不能在短时间达到完美境界,但是一天一小步,总能提高的。

[ 本帖最后由 woodman 于 2007-5-7 16:23 编辑 ]
作者: woodman    时间: 2007-5-7 17:02:57     标题: 3号改1号

大作文
It has been a controversial debute(debate) whether smoking should be allowed inthe public places or office buildings since many years ago. Some people opposethis rule while others strongly support it. In my opinion, I consider this ruleas a benefit to the society. 开头不错,赞!

First of all, this rule will guarantee a better environment to the(去掉)people without any smoke around. If there is no such rule, smokerswill enjoy their smoking in the public places without considering the sense ofthe others who around them. They will obviously pollute the environment withthe smoking gas which is composed of many(much)harmful stuff, and the nonsmokers around will respire the dirty air which willtake them many problems. However, if the rule is put into effect, it willdefinitely purify the air, and since there will be no sources that producesmoking gas in the public (places), theenvironment will be more favorable to people's health.

Moreover, this rule can save the smoker's(smokers)a huge amount of money. For most of the serious smokers, smoking will cost themlots of money every month. If there is a way that can restrict the times ofsmoking, smokers must be glad when considering the cost of the smoking. Therule is just the way(method,前面已经用过一次way) that can ban the smoking in thepublic or office buildings. Smoking may take the(bring)smokers many problems. First, it will take them much money. then(Then) with the loss of the money, smokers willworry about the living condition of their family. Finally, they will get manystress that caused by the smoking. It seems a vicious circle.

Further more, this rule will guarantee the smokers toprovide better performance.(句式和第1个分论点相同,建议变换一下) If the(去掉)smokers are allowedto smoke in the working place, it will bring a serious problem. The smokerswill always smoke when they are dealing with the work, and they will pay lessattention to their assignments. Thus, the efficiency of the smokers willfinally be at a low level. What is the result for a company if all theemployees are serious smokers? So the rule can bring the smokers a moreefficient performance, and can eventually result in more profits tothe company.

In conclusion, it is a favorable policy that it will not only win the supportof the nonsmokers but also do not receive hinder(不解什么意思) from the smokers. I really appreciate the rule applied in mycountry.
队长的作文还是很不错的,思路很清晰,文笔也流畅,4分应该可以的。美中不足是句式不够灵活,呵呵,加油啦,队长。

LM_writing
In(From) the reading passage, I know thatgarlic was once very useful. The lecture givegives two pieces of support reasons why it hassuch function.

First of all, the garlic can kill bacteria. Reseach tellsshows that garlic iseffective in killing bacteria, some garlic can even kill as many as 23 types ofbacteria. So it is no surprising that Ancient Egyptian used it as a medicine.It really had the ability to kill some kinds of ailments. And in the 20thcentury, people used it to fight infections and even as a useful thing given tosoldiers’ food. It really worked in the war.

Besides, it can heat the blood, then boosts the blood pressure. For thisfunction, people in the past thought it must have magic powers that could givepeople courage and take the evil spells away. Hence, soldiers used it in orderto gain more energy and encourage. 这一点写得太少了

In a word, garlic can not only kill the bacteria, but also increase people’sblood pressure, so it was considered a useful materiamaterialand was widely usedworldwide in the past.
我没有longman的书,所以只能粗略帮你看一下了,条理清晰,写得不错。第一点是不是用原文多了点?没书,所以不敢确定了。第二点写少了点,呵呵。

关于口语
Surprise题:没有描述你当时的感受,呵呵
Exam题:点数少了,好像就说了一点哦
Role conflict题:你说的receivedifferent expectation from familieswomanRole conflict应该是role of work and role of family之间的冲突,你只说了家庭
Dormitory题:开头说了30s哦,以至于后面没展开
Lm1说的不错,要注意更具体一点就更好了。
Lm2lm3也不错,即使我没有书,但是我能听懂你说的内容。
总的来说,你的lmdelta做得好,原因我也不知道,哈哈。
特别要提及的是你的进步,因为你前面的每一次口语我都听了,觉得进步很大。敢说就是好的,先大胆的说出来,然后再去修改内容和语音语调还有停顿。我相信这是你跨出的勇敢的一步,继续加油哦!下次声音要大一点哦,不要怕什么,敢说是王道。
我改的比较仔细,呵呵,慢慢看哦。



[ 本帖最后由 woodman 于 2007-5-7 17:14 编辑 ]
作者: woodman    时间: 2007-5-7 17:11:23

哪位有时间看看我的口语,我最担心口语,所以真心希望能得到大家的建议。
首先我自己指出自己的几个不足:
1、语调与真实美语差距甚大
2、从上一次开始,我养成了嗯的习惯,还好这个习惯时间不长,正在痛改,否则太可怕了
3、综合口语引用原文太多了
4、有些词发音可能夹在英式和美式之间(高中练的英式,大学练的美式,现在的口语在两者之间摇摆,汗,呵呵)
5、以前说的语速太快,现在已经放慢了。

此外,我听了17号的口语,忍不住赞一下,呵呵,不管是发音、语调还是停顿都做到了游刃有余,高手!内容也很不错。大家都要学习她哦。我要好好学习。我们组的口语之星了,哈哈,作文也很出色,有希望拿高分哦!

还有我的作文,能不能也提点意见啊,每一次都没有人给我的作文提意见,以至于我不知道怎么去修改了。哪位写作文比较多的组员和我联系一下,我也写了一些,我们可以交换互改。

[ 本帖最后由 woodman 于 2007-5-7 17:16 编辑 ]
作者: wgaggassi34    时间: 2007-5-7 18:17:47

谢谢3号给的建议,的确,我现在作文最缺的还是句型(所以要多多看看精华作文哈),如果句型能加强,有希望再上一个档次!
至于口语,我真的要好好练,怎么能放弃呢?要对自己负责,也要对小队负责嘛,现在努力还来得及.我的要求不高,超越自己就可以了!
原帖由 woodman 于 2007-5-7 17:02 发表
大作文
It has been a controversial debute(debate) whether smoking should be allowed inthe public places or office buildings since many years ago. Some people opposethis rule while others strongl ...

作者: wgaggassi34    时间: 2007-5-7 18:29:04

至于你说的非要给你的作文提点意见嘛,我觉得你可以用点传神的词汇,让人读起来很舒服的那种!不过这点对于考试;来说好象有点过了,没有必要的.
总之,如果你现在的作文都能在27分钟内完成,并且留有3分钟检查,考试就没有问题了.肯定是高分之作!

不过提醒你一下:考试是取2篇作文的平均分,你大作文即使写的再好(假如满分),但是小作文写的不好,就很吃亏.所以,建议你以后多花点时间在小作文上.因为你有这么好的写作基础了,小作文只要掌握要点,那么照样能拿高分!

原帖由 woodman 于 2007-5-7 17:11 发表
哪位有时间看看我的口语,我最担心口语,所以真心希望能得到大家的建议。
首先我自己指出自己的几个不足:
1、语调与真实美语差距甚大
2、从上一次开始,我养成了嗯的习惯,还好这个习惯时间不长,正在痛改, ...

作者: ily    时间: 2007-5-7 22:07:26     标题: 7_20_17

7-20

The answer of this statement depends on your own experience and life style. In my point view, smoking in public places is very important. So it is sagacious to support the good rule.  Among countless factors which influence the choice, these are three are conspicous aspects as follows.
这个开头有点怪怪的,第一句话可以不要。文章要的就是你自己的意见嘛。
  The main reason for my propensity for it is not good for our healty. There are a vast number of illnesses caused by cigarette smoke. Cigarettes can cause lung cancer and therefor smokers inlulge in cigarettes(这里有因果关系吗?). Each year many lives will be taken away by smoking. How many families will lose their members? Well, not only cancer but also heart disease will be brought by smoking. Moreover,  some disease is visible such as yellow teeth and hands. These give people bad appearance. Although people who smoke directly will harm themselves, the scientist said people who smoke indirectly would be wores, especially the children and pregant women. It is called the second cigarette. (最后一句的位置不合适,应该和前一句结合起来说:儿童和妇女受害更深,源于二手烟)

Another reason can be seen by every pesron is that smoking in public places wil destroy company`s impression. For example, if the company allow staff to smoke freely, you can see the smoke everywhere. It must give us a impression that the air is not fresh. If people can not breath the fresh air, they can not work effectively and complet the assigment very well. It also ruin the envinoment. So the benefit of the company will increase. It is not good to the company if another  company who want to cooperate with the smoky company once they come into the office. They may turn about the office. It can be thought the work attitude is not serious and earnest. (这里还可以扩充:吸烟还会引起火灾之类的灾祸)

Futhermore, forbiding smoking will help smokers not smole so often. If it is not allowes to smoke in public places, smokers must find some places that there are no one. So they can smoke in person. (这个用法不合适)It must make smokers feel trouble and not comfortable. So they have to decrease the times of smoking. It is not only good to smokers but also to other people who do not smoke. So it is very important.

In short, I think this is a good rule that no longer allow to smoke in publio places, for the people`s health, and the benefit of company. It is signality to the society. I beilieve we can do it!(最后一句建议删掉。这个写作毕竟还是考虑书面用语比较多一点)
作者: ily    时间: 2007-5-7 22:15:54     标题: 7_1_17

1_7
It has been a controversial debute(debate) whether smoking should be allowed in the public places or office buildings since many years ago. Some people oppose this rule while others strongly support it. In my opinion, I consider this rule as a benefit to the society.

First of all, this rule will guarantee a better environment to the people without any smoke around. If there is no such rule,
smokers will enjoy their smoking in the public places without considering the sense of the others who around them. They will obviously pollute the environment with the smoking gas which is composed of many harmful stuff, and the nonsmokers around will respire the dirty air which will take them many problems. However, if the rule is put into effect, it will definitely
purify the air, and since there will be no sources that produce smoking gas in the public, the environment will be more
favorable to people's health.

Moreover, this rule can save the smoker's a huge amount of money. For most of the serious smokers, smoking will cost themlots of money every month.(感觉这个论点不是很能站住脚) If there is a way that can restrict the times of smoking, smokers must be glad when considering the cost of the smoking. The rule is just the way that can ban the smoking in the public or office buildings. Smoking may take the smokers many problems. First, it will take them much money. then with the loss of the money, smokers will worry about the living condition of their family. Finally, they will get many stress that caused by the smoking. It seems a vicious circle.

Further more, this rule will guarantee the smokers to provide better performance. If the smokers are allowed to smoke in the working place, it will bring a serious problem. The smokers will always smoke when they are dealing with the work, and they will pay less attention to their assignments. Thus,the efficiency of the smokers will finally be at a low level. What is the
result for a company if all the employees are serious smokers? So the rule can bring the smokers a more efficient
performance, and can eventually result  more profits to the company.

In conclusion,it is a favorable policy that it will not only win the support of the nonsmokers but also do not receive hinder
from the smokers. I really appreciate the rule applied in my country.

我是第一次看你的文章,不知道你有没有这样的感觉:遇到题目很想把它写深。但是有的时候想太多点反而不如从最基本的出发点考虑题目来的更直接:吸烟对大家身体不好(这个点你写了,很好); 同时, 会引起火灾或者其他不好的后果,比如,小孩子效仿成年人吸烟, 等等。

我觉得3号mm写的很好,大家多向她学习!

继续加油,时间还来得及的。
作者: rzbrzb    时间: 2007-5-7 23:16:35

11改4号作文

We used to meet smokers everywhere: in the streets, in shops, and even in restaurants.  Nowadays, some countries restrict people smoke in many public areas and office buildings.  Absolutely, it is a good rule.

In the first place, it is not a secret that smoking brings about negative impacts on our health. According to a recent survey, four million people die each year from disease linked to smoking. It is a common sense for us that smoking is responsible for many fatal diseases such as lung cancer, heart disease and the list will go on.  A research points that cigarette smoking is associated with a dramatically increase in the risk of dying from chronic obstructive lung disease. About 90% of all deaths from chronic obstructive lung disease are attributable to cigarette smoking.

Meanwhile, smoking in public areas and office buildings will inevitable pollute the air. It is not only the smoker himself suffers from illness caused by smoking, but (also) people around him likely to injure (injure感觉是形容刀剑的伤吧?最好换一个词) by secondhand smoke as well. Secondhand smoke, also known as environmental tobacco smoke, contains at least 200 chemicals known to be toxic. Nonsmokers(用法不错), especially children, the elders, and pregnant women, who are exposed to secondhand smoke at home or work increase their heart disease risk. In short, Smoking is unfair to those people who do not smoke.

In addition, smoking in public can give rise to serious social issues. For instance, in dry weather, a throwing cigarette end casually may start a fire. It not just causes heavy financial loss it (去掉后加but) also poses a grave threat(这个词学习一下……) to our lives. Anther adverse effect is that many young children may be curious to adult smokers who smoking in public. Although we all know that tobacco use in adolescence is more harmful to their development, they may set adult smokers as an example.

From what I have discussed above, I believe that it is beneficial for everyone if the government limit people smoke in the majority places in public.

整体感觉写得不错~~~举例恰当用词精准,很多地方值得我学习借鉴呵呵,但是个别细节应当注意。
比较好奇的是文章中例子很多,数字很精确,不知是否是掐着时间写的?
没别的意思,只是我感觉我的差距比较大~~不是的话我很佩服你,是的话非常非常佩服你:)

[ 本帖最后由 rzbrzb 于 2007-5-7 23:18 编辑 ]
作者: 小龙团茶    时间: 2007-5-9 12:56:22     标题: 7-17-20

Nowadays, more countries regulate people smoking in public area, so many public places and office buildings are not permitted to smoke. It is definitely a good rule from my point of view. Actually, smoking is totally bad habit though some people take it as one way of relaxing.

    First of all, smoking will do harm to our health. This is not some secret, while common sense to all of us. Based on the statistics, one cigarette will shorten your life by 5 minutes. Smoking will induce cancer if you keep the habit for some period of time, the period of time is varied on different people. Lung cancer is common among those heavy smokers, followed by tongue cancer and throat cancer. When the addicts enjoy the 'relaxed' smoking time, they should realize that their health are encroached by the nicotine and other toxic chemicals gradually. Not only smokers themselves, other people who don't smoke around them will be impacted by the terrible smoke. Especially the elders, children, and pregnant women will be secondary victims if smoking in public areas is not banned.

    Secondly, smoking in public areas will bring some other bad issues. Unrestricted smoking will cause fire or other cataclysms. For instance, if the workers can smoke at anywhere in the factory, the butts they throw off casually probably induce fire accidents. The same cataclysms can also happen in elevators, or cinemas, the places usually crowded with people. Besides that, adults who smoke in public areas are bad models to our adolescents. Some young people even take that for fashion manner then follow it. If the adult smokers can control their smoking for the sake of health, those young, who are not
conscious what they are doing is to deteriorate their health, may have even more worse impact. It is not hard to imagine when the young reach to their 30-40 years old, they are struggling with cancers. It is not only the loss to themselves, their families, but also to our country, 30-40 is just the age people work at their peak of their carrer
careerlife.        


    If people are permitted to smoke only in some specific public areas, this regulation maybe reduce the frequency of their smoking, and in some degree postpone the time point for they get cancer. Another direct advantage of the regulation is, other people around smokers will not suffer the smoke in most cases. So I suggest smokers have their restricted areas even in private spaces, such as home, for their family members have the rights to protect their health. In short, requiring people not to smoke is impossible,
(and) what we can do is to reduce the impact of smoking to the minimum. Restricting people to smoke in many public areas seems to be the best way, now.

思路清晰,简练,找不出什末错误.比以前的进步很大,值得我学习,论据都举的不错,用词也是,向姐姐学习拉!

口语大家都反映不错,我同感,流畅,语调都很好,内容也不错,请教经验了!



[ 本帖最后由 小龙团茶 于 2007-5-9 13:19 编辑 ]
作者: 小龙团茶    时间: 2007-5-9 13:21:56     标题: 向大家请教经验!

我现在只是对口语的独立部分还算有些思路,其他的大家时怎莫说的,大体思路能告诉我吗?
还有就是综合写作 谢谢啦!
作者: wallace_jim    时间: 2007-5-14 00:43:27

怎么没人改我的呢?帮忙看下提下意见好不好
我的是13号wallace
作者: wgaggassi34    时间: 2007-5-14 17:35:38

你可以把情况报告给3号!
真的很抱歉!
原帖由 wallace_jim 于 2007-5-14 00:43 发表
怎么没人改我的呢?帮忙看下提下意见好不好
我的是13号wallace





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