[i习作temp] 小雯子终于有ISSUE贴了【GRE作文互助小组】 [复制链接]

飞天小雯子
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电梯直达

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发表于 2012-10-24 00:49:09 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

本帖最后由飞天小雯子于 2012-10-24 01:24 编辑

大家狠狠拍砖谢谢！

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panmingming2008
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沙发

发表于 2012-10-29 23:03:56 |只看该作者

本帖最后由 panmingming2008 于 2012-10-29 23:09 编辑

小雯子同学，
1.你写的题目是老-老-老GRE的！

2.需要补的基本功：从网上下载The Elements of Style这本写作小书，重点看句子和段落的写作。（一段只表达一个论点。你的第二段和第三段太长了，里面的逻辑颠来倒去，让读者不知所云。

3.要备考GRE写作，你要认真研读OG官方指南写作部分。重点在4、5、6分文章及reader commentary。比较下自己不足的地方和改进的方向。）
by BEN

【题目】"Many of the world's lesser-known languages are being lost as fewer and fewer people speak them. The governments of countries in which these languages are spoken should act to prevent such languages from becoming extinct."
【翻译】许多世界上鲜为人知的语言由于越来越少的人使用而逐渐消失。使用这些语言的国家应该采取措施防止这些语言绝迹。

A map called vanishing languages of the world was released by The UNESCO in 2009, which showed an unbelievable amount of lesser-known languages that are perishing regrettably. The map conspicuously verifies the first half of the claim, and, I agree insofar as a country's indigenous and distinct language, though lesser-known, should not be forgotten altogether. The government, however, may not always need to intervene in the process of elapsing of a lesser-known language.

Indeed, reasons for expirations of lesser-known languages can be various and complex. For example, in my opinion, most languages are fading away as a result of the globalization. With the increasingly expanded movements of people, goods and ideas, the trend of using a unified language is irresistible, since an indigenous language is always acting as a role of stumbling block in communicating, understanding, and thus benefiting mutually in cross-culture cooperation or even as a role of common fuse of a war as a result of misunderstanding, distrust or conflicts. Thus, those languages itselves lacking the power to define a nation's culture or the ability to convey particularly distinct ideas are surely destined to die. Consider the soon expiration of the Esperanto, which was invented only for practical uses bearing no culture at all. Impacts of the globalization of English as there are, still some nations can keep its native languages. One need take no further reflection on The Atlantic Ocean: French Canadians always stubbornly insist on French as their official language, which, as I observe, is not due to any practical reasons but only to cultural identity rooted deep inside their hearts. On the other hand, some languages are expiring contributed by more of internal reasons rather than external ones, of which I would like to mention is the Sanskrit language. Sanskrit is a language used broadly in ancient India while grasped only by an extremely small number of Indian people nowadays. The decline of Sanskrit use in literary and political circles is likely due to a weakening of the political institutions that supported it, and to heightened competition with vernacular languages seeking literary-cultural dignity.

As far as whether government is recommended to intervene in preventing the vanishing languages from total disappearing is concerned, I think the primary criterion would be whether the language has the ability or potential to bear a cultural identity .Still taking Sanskrit for instance, as universally acknowledged, it is a pathway leading us to a holy world rife of profound Buddhism wisdom which are merely recorded by inscription and books in Sanskrit. No other vanishing languages has been like Sanskrit as to evoke a universal encouragement to preserve it .In this case, government should take an inevitable responsibility to save it maybe in ways of encouraging newborn natives to learn it from their youths, etc. While some other lesser-known languages are totally different stories. Considering a nearly total destruction of cultural documents recorded in one kind of language and only a small group remained still speaking it, I can't help but imagine it to be a vacant shell even if the government try its best to save the language. On this occasion, I recommend the government not to bother to spend money and time in saving it instead of solving other serious problems such as hunger and unemployment. Nevertheless, I can't agree more that it's high time that many lesser-known languages which significantly contribute to the global cultural diversity should be preserved by efforts of governments as well as individuals.

To sum up, I agree with what the claim says that it's undesirable for so many lesser-known languages to vanish .When it comes to whether governments are recommended to intervene, however, it should be decided case by case.

问我，考我，检验我的话，以便改善你自己！

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飞天小雯子
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板凳

发表于 2012-10-30 23:40:58 |只看该作者

panmingming2008 发表于 2012-10-29 23:03
【题目】"Many of the world's lesser-known languages are being lost as fewer and fewer people spe ...

谢谢斑竹！一针见血~~~我其实写完也发现这个问题了。。。会好好改下

关于这个是老老老G 我是在作文互改小组那个帖子的每天4选1选的。。。。。以后我还是直接高频作文吧，真心来不及了

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