12月8日独立作文 电视和书

名字是个词儿UID：2707493

12.8 printed book have had greater effects on society than television has？

Unlike centuries years ago, people nowadays have opportunities to pass on information to each other in various of ways. Not only do we read but also we now listen to the radio, use the internet, and watch TV. Among these multipul forms of getting information, television has become one of the most important, that effects the society more than traditional printed books.

First of all, television deliver all kinds of knowledge and information via multiple stimulation, such as acoustics and motion of pictures. Comparing to printed book, which uses simply sight, television aparently is more appealing. People watch ESPN to enjoy games that are taking place everywhere, not having to physically go to the site; they watch discovery chennal and learn about the amazing nature, and what's more important, we can see how the creatures move exactly form TV screen, and hear it's sound as well. Not to mention how fast we are able to know about the news from television, while printed sources, even the fastest of them, the newspaper, couldn't do it so promptly. Among mordern techniques, I think television is one of the most impactive on society.

What is more, television broke the limitation of traditional printed book that it could only be appreciated by individuals seperately. There are rarely any family that don't have a TV set in the livingroom, when several people watch it together, learn, laugh, think together, we find television something we can share with eachother. The TV program brings everyone to enjoy it on the same pace, which is very hard to do for print books. For instance, in United States, on new year's eve, millions of people stare at the same ball in television, the whole country count backwards and welcome a brand new year, this fantastic experience is something we can only get from television.

Admittedly, print book is still playing an important role in the society, and reading brings us irreplaceable joy. However, it is obvious that television has been having more and more effects on the society, which exceeds that of book.

还我用户名UID：2733880

Unlike centuries years ago, people nowadays have opportunities to pass on information to each other in various of ways. Not only do we read[read printed media与后面listen to the radio对应] but also we now listen to the radio, use the internet, and watch TV. Among these multipul forms of getting information, television has become one of the most important, that effects the society more than traditional printed books. [我个人的感觉最后一句写得太客观，好像是在描述一个即成事实，而非你自己的判断和倾向。]

First of all, television deliver all kinds of knowledge and information via multiple stimulation, such as acoustics and motion of pictures[这种表达很少吧，动态影像可以说moving images]. Comparing to printed book, which uses simply sight, television aparently is more appealing. People watch ESPN to enjoy games that are taking place everywhere, not having to physically go to the site; they watch discovery chennal and learn about the amazing nature, and what's more important, we can see how the creatures move[可以改为behave] exactly form TV screen, and hear it's sound as well. Not to mention how fast we are able to know about the news from television, while printed sources, even the fastest of them, the newspaper, couldn't do it so promptly. Among mordern techniques, I think television is one of the most impactive on society.[最后一句逻辑不是很严密，容易产生歧义。你承认电视是one of the most impactive media,那很有可能跟printed book是同等重要的。直接说televison比book强就OK了。]

What is more, television broke the limitation of traditional printed book that it could only be appreciated by individuals seperately. There are rarely any family that don't have a TV set in the livingroom, when several people[family members]
watch it together, learn, laugh, think together, we find television something[there are something on the television] we can share with each other[这句稍显冗长，我改写下，你看是否合适when family members sit before the television, spend a period quality time together, their relationship may be improved by television.]. The TV program brings everyone to enjoy it on the same pace, which is very hard to do for print books. For instance, in United States, on new year's eve, millions of people stare at the same ball in television, the whole country count backwards and welcome a brand new year, this fantastic experience is something we can only get from television. [感觉叙述比较多，论述比较少。可以适当再分析两句。]

Admittedly, print book is still playing an important role in the society, and reading brings us irreplaceable joy. [这段你做了一个让步，但是可惜没有做offset，逻辑不完整。因为你的整篇文章是偏向电视的，所以必须得全文一致。也就是说，“尽管书还是很重要的，但是相比电视来说还是电视的影响更大一些”。你只说到前面那句，“但是”后面没有说到。]

However, it is obvious that television has been having more and more effects on the society, which exceeds that of book.

感觉楼主有写长句子来表达自己的愿望。但一定要注意首先要把意思说清楚。
有些用语可以多站在评卷老师的角度上思考，比如你说several people坐在一起，我们是可以理解的，你的意思是泛指家庭成员或者朋友们坐一起，但是建议考试的时候还是写得确切一些，评卷老师有可能第一反应是“只是很多人坐在一起”，就不能和你前面的living room of your family联系在一起了，他就困惑了郁闷了。
个人浅见，如有不妥，还望见谅。

yuminjiaUID：2659628

1# 名字是个词儿

Unlike centuries years ago, people nowadays have opportunities to pass on information to each other in various of ways. Not only do we read but also we now listen to the radio, use the internet, and watch TV. Among these multiple forms of getting information, television has become one of the most important XXX, that effects(
这是啥？ That 不可以做非限定的关系代词) the society more than traditional printed books.
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First of all, television deliver all kinds of knowledge and information via multiple stimulation, such as acoustics and motion of pictures. Comparing to printed book, which uses simply sight, television apparently is more appealing. People watch ESPN to enjoy games that are taking place everywhere, not having （你这个现在分词的独立主格用的好猛啊，表示什么意思？找张道长的书看下分词做伴随的用法吧， 一般是放在句首的；现在分词放句尾只表示主句产生的影响） to physically go to the site; they watch discovery channel and learn about the amazing nature, and what's more important, we can see how the creatures move exactly form TV screen ，and hear it's sound as well. Not to mention how fast we are able to know about the news from television, while printed sources, even the fastest of them, the newspaper, couldn't do it so promptly. Among modern techniques, I think television is one of the most impassive on society.
% s# E! }7 D/ l
What is more, television break( 还是用一般现在时) the limitation of traditional printed book that （    这个that 在这里起什么作用？这个是什么从句？）it could only be appreciated by individuals separately. Seldom do(我改成了倒装这里) any family that have a TV set in the living room. when several people watch TV program together, we find something we can share with each other. The TV program brings everyone to enjoy it on the same pace, which is very hard to do for print books. For instance, in United States, on new year's eve, millions of people stare at the same ball in television, the whole country count backwards and welcome a brand new year. This fantastic experience is something we can only get from television.
; O. H: t( r" ~' P6 Y' L
Admittedly, print book is still playing an important role in the society, and reading brings us irreplaceable joy. However, it is obvious that television has been having more and more effects on the society, which exceeds those(对应你的EFFECTS 复数)of book

改迟了 见谅。
错误标出，多注意些基本的句子结构，不要犯些低级错误。
加油！