卷卷的独立作文~~~2009.1.3起

eddie23508okUID: 2281260

1.16. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Playing games teaches us about life. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

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Many things teach us about life. Like movies, which attempt to convey something through media. （这句貌似不是那么的topic-related）And some people claim that playing games also teaches us to know about life, I agree with that.D7 B3 n2 Y; f+ J! d
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When we were children, playing games was considered as an effective measure to explain various complex activities in our daily life. Those days we took part in a sports games just for fun. Through physically (physical) exercise in preparing process, we were able to get all parts of our muscle flexed (stretched). Furthermore, we learned about the basic race or swimming rules in competition, and we were supposed to understand the meaning of competition and cooperation. These fundamental skills will be applied to our future life. Earlier we get familiar, better will we fit to the rising developed society. In short, I compare the game as a mini-model of competition world. If I lost (lose) in a dance game, the feeling of failure might influence my mood, I had no choice but to adapt me to that situation. Meanwhile, precious experience I would reap, which was probably help me out when I encounter the similar things in the future.（这貌似不是一个完整的句子，意思是？）
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As we grow up to an mature adults, playing games also play an important role to readjust our life to a new state. Since the increasing advancement of society, people's psychological state gets even worse, for never unaccomplished work. If we are careful enough, we will found suicide events present （presenting） a rising trend. What caused people to abandon their life easily, why they adamently say no to their life? I deem that because they didn't (haven't) discover the beauty of the life. One alternative way to solve this problem is to play games from time to time. Games are designed principally for entertainment. Through playing with friends, people opt to take off the pressure. Additionally, games bring a lot of laughter to people, and guide them to unveil the excitement out of repeated daily life.

A long life time allows abundant contents, not only sorrow times, but also funny days. Finding the beauty of life is ought to be our motive to live confidently. With lots of glee the game takes to us, I hold that playing games teaches us about life.

LZ是个仔细思考生活的人，读完文章不难发现LZ想表达很多意思，因此这篇作文的句子看起来就比以前几篇要复杂，可是句子复杂并不等于表达的意思明确，读完文章不可避免的有点似懂非懂的感觉。另外感觉文章中LZ从游戏中领悟的东西并没有很深刻的样子，至少第一第二个例子是这么感觉的，让人感觉很在理，但是却不够深刻。

shirley072UID: 2712200

超时10min
1.18. You have decided to give several hours of your time each month to improve the community where you live. What is one thing you will do to improve your community? Why? Use specific reasons and details to explain your choice.


Once I can spare several hours each month, I'd like to take part in the community organization. As a member of the agency, I'm surely to be informed about sorts of affairs that needed to be settled down.

Only when I was told about the problems occurs in my community, I could adopt appropriate measure to treat with. Nowadays, with the increasing competition in the modern society, everyone works industriously to keep their positions in company. That means, they merely have time to think about their life environments. What's more, to economize unnecessary time spent on dealing with rubbish, they probably throw out the trash just near down the floors. Maybe they consider the cleaning work to be the responsibility of community managers. On the other hand, these manager usually claim that the wrong deposit site of trash multiple their work task. If I never participate the community organization, I would still have no sense of this matter. The situation may change because I can help they do the cleaning work, and furthermore, I can pass out notice paper to every family with right trash deposit site on that. I believe that will make our community clean and beautiful.

Additionally, I can organize some meaningful activities under the name of community organization. Nowadays, accompanied by the rising urbanization, people would prefer to watching TV at home rather than communicate with neighborhood, which leads a narrow life sphere among their community. For example, I could hold a singing competition and invite people in my community to participate. In the process of the competition, once we were strangers could be familiar with each other. The efficient interactions will certainly promote our friendships, make our community an harmonious place to live. Obviously, the most important thing is that we can make friends there who can possibly encourage or consulate us when we feel upset someday.

In conclusion, I feel it’s our obligation to make our living conference better. So if I decide to spare several hours of my time each month, I will apply them in improving my community by being a member of community organization. Accordingly, I can discover and solve the concrete questions in my community.

shirley072UID: 2712200

现在怎么固定超时10min呢。。。晕，我要加油！

1.19. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People should sometimes do things that they do not enjoy doing. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.


"Ten things I hate about you" is American program I am watching currently, which describes the jokes and troubles of daily life that two sisters encounter in high school. They are always reluctant to do things they don't like. However in realistic life, I deem that sometimes people should do things even when they don't enjoy doing.

First, people are ought to be responsible for himself through insisting on doing right things but not things which amuse them. Take the studying as an example. As we all know, not everybody expects on learning knowledge. This can be simple proved by the illustration of students' score in exams. And it is undeniable that children who is not well on studying may lost confidence or forming a hatred mood towards study. As a result, they possible abandon their course in the excuse of not want to continue working they don't like. However, with the explosive advancement of information, knowledge determinates a person's development in the future. If one can't persist on learning new things, or he can't overcome the difficulties which are brought by the pessimistic feeling that he had never enjoy studying, he will be eventually fail. The consequence may be incapability upon a job, which lead a lower or no salary to survive.

Additionally, people should not only consider themselves, they are required to take other people's ideas into account. Take the house affairs as an instance. Throughout the past, everyone should appreciate his parents' hard fostering. And certainly it is our obligation to help our parents to do the house chores. I know most people don't like the task related to the house chores, and I have witness the contradicts about the disputation about the allocation of the house affairs. But as we grown up to a mature adult, our parents get even older than before, they should live a lighter living since they work hard for us during such a long time. So we have no right to refuse to do the house affairs like making a dinner, clean the plates, or sweeping the floor just because we don't feel like to do. We must invariably remember we should make our parents happy, as for me, I will do everything to make their life burden lighter, no matter what thing I am going to is enjoying.

In sum, I think sometime people should consider about their responsibilities, not only for the personal development but also for their parents or friend's mood. Thus people can decide what things are more worthy to do, not be influenced by the feeling enjoying about doing something. So I hold that sometimes people should do things they do not enjoy doing.

eddie23508okUID: 2281260

1.18. You have decided to give several hours of your time each month to improve the community where you live. What is one thing you will do to improve your community? Why? Use specific reasons and details to explain your choice.

Once I can spare several hours each month, I'd like to take part in the community organization. As a member of the agency, I'm surely (sure) to be informed about sorts of affairs that needed to be settled down. (第一段感觉表达主旨不够明显，community organization有很多种，我想LZ在这里说的是那种能解决各种社区问题的组织，如果是这样的话，前面在organization后应该说明一下；另外As a member...settled down这句让人刚看起来时有点摸不着头脑的感觉，为什么说作为其中一员，我肯定能知道各种情况，不是说句型不对，而是说这句在这里能起什么作用？感觉如果换成表明自己意思的句子更好)

Only (Once或者不要only) when I was (这里是过去时还是虚拟语气？可是两者都完全没有必要啊) told about the problems occurs (occurring) in my community, I could adopt appropriate measure to treat (deal) with (them). Nowadays, with the increasing competition in the modern society, everyone works industriously to keep their positions in company. That means, they merely have time to think about their life (living) environments.(前面这句差点没看懂，感觉转得太突然) What's more, to economize (reduce) unnecessary time spent on dealing with rubbish, they probably throw out (leave) the trash just near down the floors. Maybe they consider the cleaning work to be the responsibility of community managers. On the other hand, these manager(s) usually claim that the wrong deposit site of trash multiple their work task (这样的用法还是第一次见，loads them more heavier). If I never participate (in) the community organization, I would still have no sense of this matter. The situation may change because I can help they do the cleaning work, and furthermore, I can pass out (pass out意思是昏厥，dispense或distribute) notice paper (leaflets传单) to every family with right trash deposit site on that. I believe that will make our community clean and beautiful (cleaner and more beautiful).

Additionally, I can organize some meaningful activities under (in) the name of community organization. Nowadays, accompanied by the rising urbanization, people would prefer to watching TV at home rather than (to) communicate (communicating) with neighborhood, which leads (to) a narrow life (sociable) sphere (range) among their community. For example, I could hold a singing competition and invite people in my community to participate. In the process of the competition, once we were strangers could be familiar with each other. (People mutually unacquainted could get to know each other)The efficient interactions will certainly promote our friendships, (and) make our community an harmonious place to live. Obviously, the most important thing is that we can make friends there who can possibly encourage or consulate us when we feel upset someday.(这句在这里有点莫名其妙)

In conclusion, I feel it’s our obligation to make our living conference (living conference?生存大会？) better. So if I decide to spare several hours of my time each month, I will apply them in improving my community by being a member of community organization. Accordingly, I can discover and solve the concrete questions in my community.

内容不错，但是感觉有很多理由觉得牵强，还有一些句子也转得很硬，LZ快要考试了吗？如果还有时间，不妨先不限时，在写之前好好构思一下再下笔，等形成了一定的思维习惯再限时也不迟！加油！

sosodiuUID: 2731702

1.19. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People should sometimes do things that they do not enjoy doing. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.' q5 c5 {; N/ [, g6 N: h

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"Ten things I hate about you" is (an) American program I am watching currently, which describes the jokes and troubles of daily life that two sisters encounter in high school. They are always reluctant to do things they don't like. However in realistic life（应该是real life把 realistic应该是形容人比较多把）, I deem that sometimes people should do things even when they don't enjoy doing.(引入有些牵强，觉得话只说了一点点，如果要话题过渡应该要写这个twins的行为的后果或者什么而不是只是描述到reluctant to do things they don’t like就戛然而止)

First, people are ought to be responsible for himself through insisting on doing right things but not things which amuse them. Take the studying as an example. As we all know, not everybody expects on learning knowledge.（这里用expect on有点奇怪 不如直接用最简单的likes。或者在Expect后加learning well之类 是抱期望的意思把 一般用结果 而不应该加一件事的过程） This can be simple proved by the illustration of students' score in exams. And it is undeniable that children who is not well on studying may lost（lose） confidence or forming(form  和lose平行的把) a hatred mood towards study. As a result, they possible abandon their course in the excuse of not want to continue working they don't like. However, with the explosive advancement of information, knowledge determinates a person's development in the future. If one can't persist on learning new things, or he can't overcome the difficulties which are brought by the pessimistic feeling that he had (是不是缺个feeling和 后面的连词?)never enjoy studying, he will be eventually fail. The consequence may be incapability upon a job, which lead a lower or no salary to survive.2 S. ?3 n% d: h

Additionally, people should not only consider themselves, they are required to take other people's ideas into account. Take the house affairs as an instance. Throughout the past, everyone should appreciate his parents' hard fostering. And certainly it is our obligation to help our parents to do the house chores. I know most people don't like the task related to the house chores, and I have witness (时态)the contradicts about the disputation about the allocation of the house affairs. But as we grown up to a mature adult, our parents get even older than before, they should live a lighter （easier life）living since they work hard for us during such a long time. So we have no right to refuse to do the house affairs like making a dinner, clean the plates, or sweeping the floor just because we don't feel like to do. We must invariably remember we should make our parents happy, as for me, I will do everything to make their life burden lighter, no matter what thing I am going to is enjoying.5 b6 g; _' _7 g4 |4 B2 R
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In sum, I think sometime people should consider about their responsibilities, not only for the personal development but also for their parents or friend's mood. Thus people can decide what things are more worthy to do, not be influenced by the feeling enjoying about doing something. So I hold that sometimes people should do things they do not enjoy doing.

我觉得第三段可以把思想提炼一下，例证太长了，讲的事情并不是特别复杂读起来就有点冗余了，可以先抛出一些想法，比如人应该为了一些社会职责家庭职责去做一些自己不喜欢的事，再说原因是不能只考虑自己。然后尽量精炼下那个例证。
还有个意见，可以启用一些小词，你表达中有时候用的一些词对意思把握不大，意义太大了不恰当也许还会多打折扣
还有多谢你的意见 我快考了 但太久太久没看了….从今天起好好学习……

shirley072UID: 2712200

写得很痛苦。。。先写了一点就实在写不下去了，去看了看范文，发现为啥别人就是写得好啊。然后自己再想了想然后下笔，居然写了1个钟头


1.20 A company is going to give some money either to support the arts or to protect the environment. Which do you think the company should choose? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

As far as I am concerned, many art works' themes comes from the environment, like a poem complimenting the colorful flowers, a paint describing the busy bees. If the environment is destroyed, where should the artist to seek for the natural beauty? So I think if a company will choose one of the aspects to invest, I suggest they can give some money to protect the environment rather than to support the arts.

Like what I mentioned, I deem that a clean and comfortable surroundings severs as a basis for the creative inspiration of artist. Throughout the history of my country, China, there were numerous poets who wrote down some distinguished poems just because of encountering the natural beauties, such as beautiful West Lake in Hangzhou which surrounded by a curve trace with green trees. Try to imagine if the circumstance was polluted or degraded by human activities, the literature would obviously not exist. Nowadays, West Lake is also regarded as a sight view point which attractive numbers of people to come to appreciate. I have coincidently come across some painters there who admire the fame of West Lake and choose to draw a picture of it. Thus, environment becomes especially crucial for that they can always provide artist with natural beauties.

Additionally, since the increasing pollution of carbon dioxide, which produce a house effect worldwide, lead to the promoted sea level, the direct result would be a potential danger faced by the people who lived near the sea. Accompanied by the development of modern society, people tend to realize that protecting environment is urgent. We can't risk our home for inappropriate utilization of natural resource or deterioration of our environment. So it is our responsibility to spare no effort to make our living surroundings better. Furthermore, I consider that if a company decides to make a investment in reserving environment, a good fame will be gained according to this behavior, let alone the supports from the people who advocate in protecting our planet. As we all know, a good reputation or impression is beneficial to a corporation for people will trust their product more. That is good way for company to advance more profits.

In sum, I deem that art should contribute on the beautification of natural views which make protecting environment as a prerequisite. Also, the company could promote its good impression according to give some money to reserve environment. Thus I prefer the company give some money to protecting environment rather than support the arts.

eddie23508okUID: 2281260

1.19. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People should sometimes do things that they do not enjoy doing. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

"Ten things I hate about you" is American program I am watching currently, which describes the jokes and troubles of daily life that two sisters encounter in high school. They are always reluctant to do things they don't like. However in realistic life, I deem that sometimes people should do things even when they don't enjoy doing.(最后一句的作用是什么？除了点题之外，我还看出了转折还有递进的意思，可是为什么要转折和递进呢？感觉however在这里不恰当，直接用and连接就好，后面句子里面的even也可以去掉)

First, people are ought to be responsible for himself through insisting on doing right things but not things which amuse them. Take the studying as an example. As we all know, not everybody expects on learning knowledge. This can be simple (simply) proved by the illustration of students' score in exams. And it is undeniable that children who is not well on (good at) studying may lost (lose) confidence or forming a hatred ( negative) mood towards study. As a result, they possible (may) abandon their course in the excuse of not want (wanting) to continue working (learning) they don't like. However, with the explosive advancement of information, knowledge determinates a person's (student's) development in the future. If one can't persist on learning new things, or he can't overcome the difficulties which are brought by the pessimistic feeling that he had never enjoy studying, he will be eventually fail. The consequence may be incapability upon (in) a job (jobs), which lead (leads to) a lower or no salary to survive (for living).

Additionally, people should not only consider themselves, they are required to (should also) take other people's ideas into account. Take the house affairs as an instance. Throughout the past, everyone (people) should appreciate his (their) parents' hard fostering. And certainly it is our obligation to help our parents to do the house chores (house chores ?). I know most people don't like the task related to the house chores, and I have witness the contradicts about the disputation about the allocation of the house affairs.(此句意思有点混乱，不是很明白) But as we grown up to a mature adult, our parents get even older than before, they should live a lighter living since they work hard for us during such a long time. So we have no right to refuse to do the house affairs like making a dinner, clean the plates, or sweeping the floor just because we don't feel like to do. We must invariably remember we should make our parents happy, as for me, I will do everything to make their life burden lighter （reduce their load of daily life）, no matter what thing (whether) I am going to is enjoying (enjoy).（家务housework, 前面的house affairs 和house chores一直没明白是什么意思，看到后面才看明白）

In sum, I think sometime (sometimes) people should consider about their responsibilities, not only for the personal development but also for their parents or friend's mood. Thus people can decide what things are (is) more worthy to do, not be influenced by the feeling enjoying about doing something. So I hold that sometimes people should do things they do not enjoy doing.

举例子方面没有问题，那就来说说其他问题吧
第一，文中出现了很多无效信息，有些东西可写可不写，完全可以省略，这样可使文章简洁易懂。
第二，长句过多，感觉LZ对长句的掌握还需要多多练习，在这之前不妨多用一些短句。
第三，文章中中文式的思维随处可见，中国人可能不难理解，可是要是美国人就不一定了，建议多积累一些较为native的表达方式，因为英文不是简单的文字拼凑游   
          戏，而是有内涵的。
第四，文章逻辑方面感觉LZ有点可以地在表达一些自己的想法，可是发现在刻意写了很多东西之后都感觉写不到点上。建议多看一下范文，先不要限时，下笔之前窒
          息思考。
第五，有很多把握不大的词汇。

shirley072UID: 2712200

1.21 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Grades (marks) encourage students to learn. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

Many people believe that a good mark encourages students to learn. However I can't totally agree with that. In my opinion, students can be divided to two different type, one of they concern their grade intensively, the other type of students don't even care the grade. So I hold that grades can not always encourage students to learn.

As the wide use of the grade as a standard estimation, which has been demonstrated for years as an effective tool to check the students' learning efficiency, we can't deny its distinct advantages such as convenience. Not only the teachers, but also students themselves can promptly get a full appreciation of their study. Based on the information the grade contains, students are supposed to figure out their week points, and strengthen their learning on the unfamiliar knowledge. However, this is not the real situation especially when a student feel boring about study and never care the grade. Most of such students may share a common characteristic that incessantly failures make a bad impact on their confidence, eventually lead to an ignorance about the scores. In order to encourage these students, teacher has to change the teaching measures to help them. As we all known, a low mark on assignment doesn't necessarily indicate a failure on other aspects. A responsible teacher will find out the traits of everyone, and encourage them to exhibit themselves in participating in a host competition and so on. I believe this will be effective than give a grade to evaluate their study level.

On the other hand, grade dose encourage some students who care much about their study effect or their future development. For this type of students are usually considered as ambitious and persevering people who have particular goals. Grade is undoubted to be a good and convenient tool to check the study level. What's more, the time they get a excellent grade, is also the time they feel a heavier pressure which push they to maintain. As far as I am concerned, that is the real way the grade encourages. This reminds me of my high school classmates, a boy and a girl occupied the first two place as long as 3 years. I had asked the girl, what kept her always being the 1st or 2nd. She smiled and answered that when she found her score lower than the boy’s, she reflected herself immediately by changing the learning skill and analyze the exams. She impressed me a lot for her insistence on the grade, which in turn encourages her to improve her study.

In sum, according to the different attitude toward to the grade, we can draw a consequence that grade only works out when facing the ambitious and persevering students who concentrate on their marks. To some other students who never care about grade, other teaching measures should be applied to encourage students.

summerdingdavidUID: 2718039

https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1053108-1-1.html
放到进军100+里根本没有人拍啊！还是我们仨互拍吧！LZ

eddie23508okUID: 2281260

1.20 A company is going to give some money either to support the arts or to protect the environment. Which do you think the company should choose? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

As far as I am concerned, many art works' themes comes from the environment, like a poem (poems) complimenting the colorful flowers, a paint (paintings) describing the busy bees. If the environment is destroyed, where should the artist to seek for the natural beauty? So I think if a company will choose one of the aspects to invest, I suggest they can give some money to protect the environment rather than to support the arts. (简明点明主旨，很好的开头)

Like what I (have) mentioned, I deem that a clean and comfortable surroundings severs (serves) as a basis for the creative inspiration of artist. Throughout the history of my country, China, there were numerous poets who wrote down some distinguished poems just because of encountering (feeling) the natural beauties (the beauty of nature), such as beautiful West Lake in Hangzhou which surrounded by a curve trace with green trees. Try to imagine if the circumstance (pleasant environment) was (had been虚拟语气，表示与过去事实相反) polluted or degraded by human activities (then那时), the literature would obviously not exist（the literature would not have been created）. Nowadays, West Lake is also regarded as a sight view point (scenic spot) which attractive (attracts) numbers of people to come to appreciate. (And) I have coincidently come (came) across some painters there who admire (admired) the fame of West Lake and choose to draw (drew) a picture (pictures) of it. Thus, environment becomes especially crucial for that they can always provide artist with natural beauties.

Additionally, since the increasing pollution (emission) of carbon dioxide, which produce (results in) a  (the green) house effect worldwide, lead to the promoted (rising) sea level, the direct result would be a potential danger faced by the people who lived (live) near the sea. Accompanied by the development of modern society, people tend to realize that protecting environment is urgent. We can't risk our home for inappropriate utilization of natural resource or deterioration of our environment. So it is our responsibility to spare no (pay every) effort to make our living surroundings better. Furthermore, I consider that if a company decides to make a investment in reserving (preserving) environment, a good fame will be gained according to this behavior,(这点写得好，当时想写来着，可是后来写着写着就忘记了) let alone the supports from the people who advocate in protecting our planet. As we all know, a good reputation or impression is beneficial to (for) a corporation (to advertise themselves)for people will trust their product more. That (which) is a good way for company to advance (earn) more profits.

In sum, I deem that art should contribute on the beautification of natural views which make protecting environment as a prerequisite.(这句感觉看不懂，句式有点复杂) Also, the company could promote its good impression according to give some money to reserve environment（for supporting the enterprise of environment protection）. Thus I prefer the company give some money to protecting (protect) environment rather than support the arts.

文章开头很好，内容以及论点还有展开的程度很好，可是小问题太多，多得不能忽略，有些句式先不说，单是语法错误就非常的多，虽说一两个语法错误不会对作文质量以及评分产生影响，可是太多的话就不好了。有些句子太绕了，如果一个句子表达不完，不妨分开成几个短句子来表达。

PS:我2月13号考，我也没开始限时呢。加油！

zhengping001UID: 2689322

1.21 Do you agree or disagree withthe following statement? Grades (marks) encourage students to learn. Usespecific reasons and examples to support your opinion.7 _+^4 _" q* K9 u1 B
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Many people believe that a good mark encourages students to learn. However(,) I can't totally agree with that. In myopinion, students can be divided to two different type(types),one of they(指其中的一个学生还是两种类型中的一种，thefirst type of students) concern their gradeintensively, the other type of students don't even care the grade. So I holdthat grades can not always encourage students to learn./ q: e- E+ |5 x/P5 n4 |
% J& e4 b9 i0 Y8 U% ~$ s0 n; W8 ~
As the wide use of the grade as a standard estimation, which has beendemonstrated for years as an effective tool to check the students' learningefficiency, we can't deny its distinct(essential) advantagessuch as convenience. Not only the teachers, butalso students themselves can promptly get a full appreciation of their study.Based on the information the grade contains, studentsare supposed to(这里是什么意思，有点不明白？) figure out their week(weak) points, and strengthen their learning onthe unfamiliar knowledge. However, this is not the realsituation especially when a student feel boring about (his) study and nevercare the grade(this指什么？前后两句没有什么转折的意思). Most of such studentsmay share a common characteristic
that incessantly(incessant,副词不能修饰名词) failures make a bad impact(create someharmful impacts) on their confidence, eventually lead to an ignoranceabout the scores. In order to encourage these students, teacher has to changethe teaching measures to help them. As we all known, alow mark on assignment doesn't necessarily indicate a failure on other aspects(alow mark of a student in one examination doesn't mean that he fails to otheraspects). A responsible teacher will find out the traits of everyone,and encourage them to exhibit themselves in participating in a host competitionand so on. I believe this will be effective than give a grade to evaluate theirstudy level.9 U  ^3 C#z2 y

$ z& h; i. \& u- u6 I7 j, l7d" tOn the other hand, grade(grades)dose encourage some students (to learn) who care much(much care) abouttheir study effect (the effects of their study) or their future development(their career in future). For(去掉) this type of studentsare usually considered as ambitious and persevering people who have particulargoals. Grade is undoubted (it is undoubted that grades,不过这里跟第一段里有重复)to be a good and convenient tool tocheck the study level. What's more, the time they get a excellent grade, isalso the time they feel a heavier pressure which push they to maintain. As faras I am concerned, that is the real way the gradeencourages. This reminds me of my highschool classmates, a boy and a girl occupied the first two place as long as 3years. I had asked the girl, what kept her always being the 1st or 2nd. Shesmiled and answered that when she found her score lower than the boy’s, shereflected herself immediately by changing the learning skill and analyze theexams. She impressed me a lot for her insistence on the grade, which in turnencourages her to improve her study.
/ I' K' V/ \. Q$ q7 `( Z7 D3 F' P1 G0 B9 g1 @( _1 n
In sum, according to the different attitude toward to the grade, we can draw aconsequence that grade only works out when facing the ambitious and perseveringstudents who concentrate on their marks. To some other students who never careabout grade, other teaching measures should be applied to encourage students.
总评：字数很多，好像有500多了，不过看得我云里雾里，虽然有很多连接词，但句子之间缺少逻辑上的连接，感觉像是很多个独立的句子组成的。改不对的地方还请告之。

summerdingdavidUID: 2718039

占座，互改哈！

shirley072UID: 2712200

1.22. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? There is nothing that young people can teach older people. Use specific reasons and examples to support your position.


We've always heard that old people complain about the young people who are going to lose some traditional traits like politeness, perseverance and so on. Based on the negative opinion towards to the young, old people insist that there is nothing that young people can teach them. However, considering the increasing development of the modern world, I hold the contrast view, that nowadays, old people have much to learn from young people.

First and foremost, the advanced technology grows up as a new skill which emerges recently, which means that old people have never seen it before, let alone manipulate the skill. For example, internet technology, which is considered as one of the most noted inventions, leads us to share explosive information and provides numerous platforms like Taobao website with convenient shopping. One day, my farther found that surfing internet could facilitate him to be informed with various news in a short time. Instantly, he became facilitated with that and asked me to teach him how to use the function of bookmark to keep his favorite websites. See, that's the way I teach my parents. Along with the familiar application on collecting website, my father continuously asked me about the chat tools. My point is once the new skill appears, it is always the young people who get sophisticated. As expects in these new fields, they can teach old people.

Additionally, since young and old people grow up in different circumstance, it is certainly that they have learned different knowledge. No one is able to claim that he knows everything in the world even the old people who experience longer times than young people. Take my family as an example, my parents graduated from high school, they didn't know advanced math, concrete chemistry actions, and even English. However, they raised a daughter who attends college and learns much knowledge they don't know. Now in turn, I can teach them anything I learned through my study course. Like right now, I teach them basic English conversations in case that one day they will come to see me abroad.

In sum, the old age can't necessarily indicate owning more knowledge, what the real thing it represents is that old people may hold more experience and they can teach young people by utilizing them. However, there are still numerous things they don't know. Young people is the truly generation who are intensely linked to the modern world, they can teach people the new skills or the knowledge old people didn't have chance to learn before.

summerdingdavidUID: 2718039

42# summerdingdavid
叫作业咯！
As more and more people have realized the importance of education, the issue that what is the optimal way to facilitate students to learn has received widely attention, while from my opinion, grades should be fairly considered as an acceptable method to promote student to learn.

It is a gerenally accepted belief that marks make us better learners. Firstly, appraising students’ knowledge capability by grades, which is relatively much more fair than other standards, students who under necessary pressure and stress are prone to learn more and research deeper. For example, in order to get a high scores in a history exam, since no one would not like to lag behine other peers, participtants would spare no effort to search information from books, internet, texts, to take similar excersices before getting a real one, to discusse pluzzing question in a learning group. By doing these painstaking prepartion, students are expected to mould into adaptive and creative individuals.

Another benefit produced by adopting score to advance students to learn is that a benign competitive consciousness has been instilled in every student, who is supposed to struggle to survive in a fiercely competitive society. No one can deny the brutal truth that without a strongly competitive awareness, young man can hardly survive in this rapidly developing society, let alone achive success. In other words, this educational environment, in which students are aware of getting a high score, is likened to the rehearse of future society, therefore, provide students with mental preparation.

However, while we enjoy the merit brought by this measure, we cannot afford to neglect the demerit it would impact on student. The pressure and stress of getting a high score inflicted on many student, who are no interesting on studying, may leave psychological traumas on their young mind.

Considering the reasons I mentioned above, we can safely reach the conclusion that grades can promote student to learn. However, at the meantime, we also should not lose the sight of the potential disadvantage it would bring to student.

shirley072UID: 2712200

44# summerdingdavid

As more and more people have realized the importance of education, the issue that what is the optimal way to facilitate students to learn has received widely attention, while from (in) my opinion, grades should be fairly considered as an acceptable method (grades可以直接同等于method么？) to promote student to learn.

It is a gerenally accepted belief (it is generally accepted) that marks make us better learners. Firstly, appraising students’ knowledge capability by grades, which is relatively much more fair than other standards, students who under necessary pressure and stress are prone to learn more and research deeper (这种表述很别扭呢). For example, in order to get a high scores in a history exam, since (这个插入让整个句子突然不顺畅) no one would not like to lag behine other peers, participtants would spare no effort to search information from books, internet, texts, to take similar excersices before getting a real one, to discusse pluzzing question in a learning group (这个句子太长了，后面的to take和from有没有并列的关系。建议分成短句来说). By doing these painstaking prepartion, students are expected to mould into adaptive and creative individuals.

Another benefit produced by adopting score to advance students to learn is that a benign competitive consciousness has been instilled in every student, who is supposed to struggle to survive in a fiercely competitive society. No one can deny the brutal truth that without a strongly competitive awareness, young man can hardly survive in this rapidly developing society, let alone achive success. In other words, this educational environment, in which students are aware of getting a high score, is likened to the rehearse of future society, therefore, provide students with mental preparation.

However, while we enjoy the merit brought by this measure, we cannot afford to neglect the demerit it would impact on student. The pressure and stress of getting a high score inflicted on many student, who are no interesting on studying, may leave psychological traumas on their young mind.

Considering the reasons I mentioned above, we can safely reach the conclusion that grades can promote student to learn. However, at the meantime, we also should not lose the sight of the potential disadvantage it would bring to student.

我觉得文章里面有很多出彩的词汇以及顺畅的句子
但是从内容上来说，我觉得关于题目grades的理解并不是直接指的high grade，而童鞋的文章给我的感觉是论证了好分数能够鼓励student。
而第二部分的论证，我觉得有点难理解，是在说争取high grade是为了培养竞争意识么而适应以后的社会么？但是不管如何也要回到topic，要用文字写出来竞争意识是为了鼓励学生学习