Issue138红尘笑沧桑作文互改小组第5周周1作业

bigeyes_1314UID: 2736288

1.11.2010
题目：ISSUE138 - "Only through mistakes can there be discovery or progress."
字数：495
用时：00:44:25
日期：2010/1/11 11:58:51
Can there be discovery or progress only through mistakes? To some extent, I agree that we can learn much from mistakes in history and from mistakes which we made on the way to success. Yet, the author overrates the role of mistakes. There are some other approaches for us to making progress or discovery.

Admittedly, mistakes play a vital role on the way to progress and new discoveries. On one hand, through mistakes we can know our disadvantages and reconsider our behavior before we take new actions. For most students, it must be an assignment for them to correct their mistakes which they made in the test. The reason why students are supposed to do this is that through correcting their mistakes, they can know what knowledge they have not acquired yet, and then they will endeavor to get better grades. On the other hand, mistakes can help one to avoid making the same flaws. History tells us that if one makes the same mistakes, he will pay a heavy price. For example, Louis XVI-the king of France, who ultimately was executed by his people due to he constantly made the mistake of ignoring the demands of reforming society. Therefore, we should pay a considerable attention to mistakes and adjust our actions to avoid making the same ones.

However, there are some circumstances in which one cannot make mistakes, especially for those who have high-specialized skills.
For instance, a surgery doctor cannot fail to his operation because his job is a matter of life and death. We cannot imagine what will happen if some experts fail to build a nuclear power plant near a metropolitan. But we are sure that if there is any mistake in such circumstance, it will be a disaster to individuals, a society, even the whole world.

Last but not least, there are other approaches of making progress or achieving new discoveries besides mistakes. We can learn from others’ experience, books, and other approaches. Sometimes one can discover something by accident. Newton was inspired by a falling apple accidentally and discovered the gravity. Meanwhile, persistence is essential on the way to progress. Edison never gave up his invention after a numerous of mistakes till he invented the bulb which brings light to human. Wason, Crick and Wilkins have plenty of courage to challenge themselves so that they can succeed in the discovery of DNA double helix model. Besides one's persistence, the proper means of discovery is also essential for one's progress. If one consistently insists on the wrong means to deal with the problem, he is bounded to fail again.

In sum, we can conclude that to err is human, making mistakes is inevitable on the way to progress and discoveries. Hence, we should be patient and have enough courage to face the mistakes. Meanwhile, we need to take appropriate means to deal with mistakes so that we can make greater achievements.

题目：ARGUMENT150 - The following is a letter to the editor of an environmental magazine.
"The decline in the numbers of amphibians worldwide clearly indicates the global pollution of water and air. Two studies of amphibians in Yosemite National Park in California confirm my conclusion. In 1915 there were seven species of amphibians in the park, and there were abundant numbers of each species. However, in 1992 there were only four species of amphibians observed in the park, and the numbers of each species were drastically reduced. The decline in Yosemite has been blamed on the introduction of trout into the park's waters, which began in 1920 (trout are known to eat amphibian eggs). But the introduction of trout cannot be the real reason for the Yosemite decline because it does not explain the worldwide decline."
字数：405
日期：2010/1/11 11:58:51

In the argument, the editor concludes that the decline in the number of amphibians worldwide clearly indicated the global pollution of water and air. To support his conclusion, he cites that two studies of amphibians in Yosemite National Park in California confirms his conclusion and that the decline of amphibians in Yosemite has been blamed on trout in the park's waters.
He also points out that the introduction of trout cannot be the real reason for the Yosemite decline because it does not explain the worldwide decline. At the first sight, the argument seems to be reasonable. However, further scrutiny shows that the argument is flawed in several aspects.
First, it is not convincing that the editor only provided us two studies in Yosemite. Is Yosemite typical enough for the editor to draw the conclusion? What are the similarities between Yosemite and other worldwide parks? It is unpersuasive that the editor only provided us two studies in the same park.
Secondly, the editor failed to analyze the reason why the numbers of amphibians declined in Yosemite. Perhaps it is the climate change that the number of amphibians has declined, or maybe there are other species which eat amphibians so that the number of amphibians declined. Therefore, we cannot draw the conclusion that it is the global pollution of water and air that causes the decline of amphibians.
Thirdly, the editor provided no evidence to refute that the introduction of trout cannot be the real reason for the Yosemite amphibians decline. Perhaps it is just the trout which eat too many amphibians’ eggs so it caused the decline of amphibians instead of the pollution of air and water. Meanwhile, the author provides no affirmative evidence that pollution was the reason for the decline. So the author’s broad assertion that a worldwide decline in amphibians indicates global pollution is entirely unconvincing.

In sum, the editor cites too little evidence to convince me that the reason of the decline of amphibians is the global pollution of water and air. To make his conclusion persuasive, he should examine all changes occurring in Yosemite between 1915 and 1992 and show that air and water pollution have at least contributed to the park’s amphibian decline. In any event, the author must provide data about amphibian changes and pollution at diverse geographical locations; and the data must show a strong inverse correlation between levels of air and water and amphibian populations worldwide.

forevarsenalUID: 2737856

Can there be discovery or progress only through mistakes? To some extent, I agree that we can learn much from mistakes in history and from mistakes which we made on the way to success. Yet, the author overrates the role of mistakes. There are some other approaches for us to making progress or discovery.

Admittedly, mistakes play a vital role on the way to progress and new discoveries. On one hand, through mistakes we can know our disadvantages and reconsider our behavior before we take new actions. For most students, it must be an assignment for them to correct their mistakes which they made in the test. The reason why students are supposed to do this is that through correcting their mistakes, they can know what knowledge they have not acquired yet, and then they will endeavor to get better grades. On the other hand, mistakes can help one to avoid making the same flaws. （这有点牵强，有些人老是范同样错误，比如在下）History tells us that if one makes the same mistakes, he will pay a heavy price. For example, Louis XVI-the king of France, who ultimately was executed by his people due to he constantly made the mistake of ignoring the demands of reforming society. Therefore, we should pay a considerable attention to mistakes and adjust our actions to avoid making the same ones.（个人觉得这个例子应该用于论证教育人们从错误中学习）

However, there are some circumstances in which one cannot make mistakes, especially for those who have high-specialized skills.
For instance, a surgery doctor cannot fail to his operation because his job is a matter of life and death. We cannot imagine what will happen if some experts fail to build a nuclear power plant near a metropolitan. But we are sure that if there is any mistake in such circumstance, it will be a disaster to individuals, a society, even the whole world.

Last but not least, there are other approaches of making progress or achieving new discoveries besides mistakes. We can learn from others’ experience（经验也包括错误的经验吧，这等于一样东西有两种分法，即可分为A和B，也能分为C和D，你说了A后应该说B，但你说的是C或D，逻辑上不对）, books, and other approaches. Sometimes one can discover something by accident. Newton was inspired by a falling apple accidentally and discovered the gravity（牛顿的例子太老了，换个其他的）. Meanwhile, persistence is essential on the way to discovery and progress(加上红色的部分，这样论证要全面，不忽视任何方面）. Edison never gave up his invention after a numerous of mistakes till he invented the bulb which brings light to human. Wason, Crick and Wilkins have plenty of courage to challenge themselves so that they can succeed in the discovery of DNA double helix model. Besides one's persistence, the proper means of discovery is also essential for one's progress. If one consistently insists on the wrong means to deal with the problem, he is bounded to fail again.

In sum, we can conclude that to err is human, making mistakes is inevitable on the way to progress and discoveries. Hence, we should be patient and have enough courage to face the mistakes. Meanwhile, we need to take appropriate means to deal with mistakes so that we can make greater achievements.

（下次给个中文提纲好吗，这样我能很快把握你的思路，改起来要准确点）