1006G[redemption]备考贴 by 丹心

ahmxwdUID: 2390552

还是那句老话：无卧佛，不飞跃！！！

3.4


I50+A20


本周目标：
（自虐中……闲人勿近，后果自负）

ahmxwdUID: 2390552

“In our time, specialists of all kinds are highly overrated. We need more generalists—people who can
provide broad perspectives."

In this era of rapid social and technological change leading to increasing life complexity and psychological displacement[背景介绍，点出了complexity 以及 displacement,为后面提出本文的主题埋下伏笔], both positive and negative effects among persons in Western society call for a balance in which there are both specialists and generalists.[从背景过度到文章主题，提出见解，形成与题设的对立，关键词在于balance，预示后文将从两个方面进行论述，简单明了，统领全文][点明本文要论述的内容，即主题句]

[分论点1：从specialists入手，进行analyse，即：将题目的概念分类讨论，条例清晰]
Specialists are necessary[分论点，部分肯定，关键词necessary，表示不可或缺] in order to[分论点原因阐述，reasoning，表明这个观点的提出有理有据，有合理性和逻辑性] allow society as a whole to properly and usefully assimilate the masses of new information and knowledge that have come out of research and have been widely disseminated through mass global media. As the head of Pharmacology at my university once said [用实例支撑自己的分论点，about specialists，通过具体的事实来对自己先前的推论进行有力支持](and I paraphrase):"I can only research what I do because there are so many who have come before me to whom I can turn for basic knowledge. It is only because of each of the narrowly focussed individuals at each step that a full and true understanding of the complexities of life can be had. Each person can only hold enough knowledge to add one small rung to the ladder, but together we can climb to the moon." This illustrates the point that [将实例同本段文字联系起来，同时深化例子所说明的观点]our societies level of knowledge and technology [由小及大，考虑到任何实例都有其局限性，所以进行结论推广，由点到面]is at a stage in which there simply must be specialists in order for our society to take advantage of the information available to us.

[对分论点1进行小结，采用推谬法，验证不这么做的后果，反证自己观点的正确性]
Simply put, without specialists, [反证法开头]our society would find itself bogged down in the Sargasso sea of information overload. While it was fine for early physicists to learn and understand the few laws and ideas that existed during their times, now, no one individual can possibly digest and assimilate all of the knowledge in any given area.[通过给出建议，来将这种反例同第一个分论点相联系起来，逻辑关系紧密]

[分论点2：从另一个方面进行analyse，表示不可以over，体现了主题句中的balance，分论点与主论点相互呼应]
On the other hand, Over specialization means narrow focii in which people can lose the larger picture.[第一句即为分段的分论点，一目了然]No one can hope to understand the human body by [立刻进行原因的解释，同时过渡到例证，表明自己有理有据，逻辑关系严密]only inspecting one's own toe-nails.[比喻论证，即给出了实例，又使抽象的观点具体化] What we learn from a narrow focus may be internally logically coherent but may be irrelevant or fallacious within the framework of a broader perspective. [对例子进行阐述，将之联系到现实中更广泛的领域，以小见大]Further, if we inspect only our toe-nails, we may conclude that the whole body is hard and white. [反证法/推谬法，从逻辑论述再次回到原来的例子，不过从对立面展开论述]Useful conclusions and thus perhaps useful inventions must come by sharing among specialists. Simply throwing out various discovieries means we have a pile of useless discoveries, it is only when one can make with them a mosaic that we can see that they may form a picture.[小结本段论证，并且推广到一般情况]

[对分论点2的深入分析，从广度方面进行深化]
Not only may over-specialization be dangerous in terms of the truth, purity and cohesion of knowledge, but it can also serve to drown moral or universall issues. [反证法，同时将推谬的范围进一步扩大，使得与题设相悖的观点更为有力，更加compelling]Generalists and only generalists can see a broad enough picture to realize and introduce to the world the problems of the environment. With specialization, each person focusses on their research and their goals. [分开讨论双方各自的作用，为后文的推论提供逻辑依据]Thus, industrialization, expansion, and new technologies are driven ahead. Meanwhile no individual can see the wholisitc view of our global existence[阐述对于广泛背景下的影响，呼应本段开头的广度] in which true advancement may mean stifling individual specialists for the greater good of all.


[对分论点2的深入分析，从细节方面进行验证]
Finally, over-specialization in a people's daily lives and jobs has meant personal and psychological compartmentalization.[分段主题句，用完成时表示这是一种客观现象，而非作者主观臆测] People are forced into pigeon holes early in life (at least by university) [避免话说得过于绝对]and must conciously attempt to consume external forms of stimuli and information in order not to be lost in their small and isolated universe. Not only does this make for narrowly focussed and generally pooprly-educated individuals, but it guarantees a sense of loss of community, often followed by a feeling of psychological displacement and personal dissatisfaction.[进行结论推广：从个人生活方面推广到社会心理方面，点明细节和总体的关系]

[论点总结]
Without generalists, society becomes inward-looking and eventually inefficient. Without a society that recongnizes the impotance of braod-mindedness and fora for sharing generalities, individuals become isolated. [总结第二分论点]Thus, while our form of society necessitates specialists, generalists are equally important.[中心论点，与开头呼应] Specialists drive us forward in a series of thrusts while generalists make sure we are still on the jousting field and know what the stakes are.[总结两者的作用，表明缺一不可]

ahmxwdUID: 2390552

5：
[开头简介明了地给出自己的观点，不详细展开]
Specialists are not overrated today. [开门见山，给出作者的观点]More generalists may be needed, but not to overshadow the specialists. [阐明两者的关系，留有余地，同时支持自己的观点]Generalists can provide a great deal of information on many topics of interest with a broad range of ideas.[原因解释，突出broad range] People who look at the overall view of things can help with some of the large problems our society faces today. But specialists are necessary to gain a better understanding of more in depth methods to solve problems or fixing things.[全文主题，突出specialists 的重要性]

[以现实例子为依托，从一个大方面阐述中心观点的理论和事实依据]
One good example of why specialists are not overrated is in the medical field. [开门见山给出本段论述的对象，同时由个人的观点自然地过度到现实依据]Doctors are necessary for people to live healthy lives. When a person is sick, he may go to a general practitioner to find out the cause of his problems. Usually, this kind of "generalized" doctor can help [紧密联系观点，点明这种doctor是general的代表]most ailments with simple and effective treatments. Sometimes, though, a sickness may go beyond a family doctor's knowledge or the prescribed treatments don't work the way they should. [指出特定情况，突出general的局限性，提出special的必要性]When a sickness progresses or becomes diagnosed as a disease that requires more care than a family doctor can provide, he may be referred to a specialist.[过渡到对specialist的论述] For instance, a person with constant breathing problems[例子的具体化，即：哮喘病，从而显得更有说服力和具有事实依据] that require hospitalization may be suggested to visit an asthma specialist. Since a family doctor has a great deal of knowledge of medicine, he can decide when his methods are not effective and the patient needs to see someone who knows more about the specific problem[再次回到generalist，说明其作用，体现出作者考虑的完善以及周到]; someone who knows how it begins, progresses, and specified treatments. This is an excellent example of how a generalied person may not be equipped enough to handle something as well as a specialized one can.[段落例子的总结，再次回到论述的主题上来，使得联系更为紧密，逻辑更为严密]

[以现实例子为依托，从另外一个大方面阐述中心观点的理论和事实依据]
Another example of a specialist who is needed instead of a generalist involves teaching.[点明论述的对象，总领全段] In grammar school, children learn all the basic principles of[给出具体例子，做到有理有据] reading, writing, and arithematic. But as children get older and progress in school, they gain a better understanding of the language and mathematical processes. As the years in school increase,[按照时间和事物发展的特点，表现出general的局限性，而上一段是从不同情形这个角度来讨论的，既有横向例证又有纵向例证] they need to learn more and more specifics and details about various subjects. They start out by learning basic math concepts such as addition, subtraction, division, and multiplication. A few years later, they are ready to begin algebraic concepts, geometry, and calculus. They are also ready to learn more advanced vocabulary, the principles of how all life is composed and how it functions. One teacher or professor can not provide as much in depth discussion on all of these topics as well as one who has learned the specifics and studied mainly to know everything[指出问题的关键和症结所在，为下文的分析做好铺垫] that is currently known about one of these subjects. Generalized teachers are required to begin molding students at a very early age so they can get ready for the future ahead of them in gaining more facts about the basic subjects and finding out new facts on the old ones.[指出general的主要作用，突出其适用场合]

[例子总结，主题深化]
These are only two examples of why specialists are not highly overrated and more generalists are not necessary to the point of overshadowing them.[总结前两段内容] Generalists are needed to give the public a broad understanding of some things. But , specialists are important to help maintain the status, health, and safety of our society. Specialists are very necessary.[从两个方面揭示了special以及general不同的作用，最后强调了special的重要性和不可或缺性]

ahmxwdUID: 2390552

Hospital statistics regarding people who go to the emergency room after roller skating accidents indicate the need for more protective equipment. Within this group of people, 75 percent of those who had accidents in streets or parking lots were not wearing any protective clothing (helmets, knee pads, etc.) or any light-reflecting material (clip-on lights, glow-in-the-dark wrist pads, etc.). Clearly, these statistics indicate that by investing in high-quality protective gear and reflective equipment, roller skaters will greatly reduce their risk of being severely injured in an accident.

[描述问题所在，提出评论]
The notion that protective gear reduces the injuries suffered in accidents seems at first glance to be an obvious conclusion.[简述题目的观点，用seems作为伏笔，为后文展开攻击作准备] After all, it is the intent of these products to either provent accidents from occuring in the first place or to reduce the injuries suffered by the wearer should an accident occur.[强调句式突出题目的观点] However, the conclusion that investing in high quality protective gear greatly reduces the risk of being severely injured in an accident may mask other (and potentially more significant) causes of injuries and may inspire people to over invest financially and psychologically in protective gear.[给出作者自己的评论，并且提出题目这种观点的后果，说明作出改变的必要性]


First of all,[从主要矛盾入手，开始切入] as mentioned in the argument,[描述相关内容] there are two distinct kinds of gear - preventative gear (such as light reflecting material) and protective gear (such as helmets). Preventative gear is intended to warn others, presumably for the most part motorists, of the presence of the roller skater.[阐述相关论述对象的功能] It works only if the "other" is a responsible and caring individual who will afford the skater the necessary space and attention.[由前面一句对功能的阐述，提出题目所述观点的局限性，用题目的观点来攻击题目本身] Protective gear is intended to reduce the effect of any accident, whether it is caused by an other, the skater or some force of nature. Protective gear does little, if anything, to prevent accidents but is presumed to reduce the injuries that occur in an accident.[同前面两句的功能，这种平行结构使得论述更有条理，结构更为清晰] The statistics on injuries suffered by skaters would be more interesting if[对题目中的统计例证展开攻击，说明片面性和局限性，同时从其缺点出发，提出可行的建议] the skaters were grouped into those wearing no gear at all, those wearing protective gear only, those wearing preventative gear only and those wearing both. These statistics could provide skaters with a clearer understanding of which kinds of gear are more beneficial.

[攻击观点中另一个缺点]
The argument above is weakened by the fact that it does not take into account the inherent differences between skaters who wear gear and those who do not.[从另一主要缺陷展开攻击，说明其观点的片面性] If is at least likely that those who wear gear may be generally more responsible and/or safety conscious individuals.[提出可能的，题目未考虑到的情况] The skaters who wear gear may be less likely to cause accidents through careless or dangerous behavior. It may, in fact, be their natural caution and repsonsibility that keeps them out of the emergency room rather than the gear itself.[详细说明可能的具体情况，越具体，越真实，越可信，越compelling] Also, the statistic above is based entirely on those who are skating in streets and parking lots which are relatively dangerous places to skate in the first place.[次要矛盾包含于主要矛盾中进行攻击] People who are generally more safety conscious (and therefore more likely to wear gear) may choose to skate in safer areas such as parks or back yards.[将同一段中的主要错误和次要错误相互联系起来，成为一个完整的整体，同时体现出作者complexity的思维]

[攻击其论据的作用]
The statistic also goes not differentiate between severity of injuries. The conclusion that safety gear prevents severe injuries suggests that it is presumed that people come to the emergency room only with severe injuries.[对题目中的描述进行诠释，将隐藏的不足暴露出来，方便攻击] This is certainly not the case. Also, given that skating is a recreational activity that may be primarily engaged in during evenings and weekends (when doctors' offices are closed),[指出次要不足：时间的局限，同时和主要缺点联系起来，原则：主要包含次要] skater with less severe injuries may be especially likely to come to the emergency room for treatment.

[攻击其主观臆测]
Finally, there is absolutely no evidence provided that high quality (and presumably more expensive) gear is any more beneficial than other kinds of gear. For example, a simple white t-shirt may provide the same preventative benefit as a higher quality, more expensive, shirt designed only for skating.[用事实依据（即反例）来攻击没有根据的观点] Before skaters are encouraged to invest heavily in gear, a more complete understanding of the benefit provided by individual pieces of gear would be helpful.[由题目的不足出发，给出建议]

[全文总结]
The argument for safety gear based on emergency room statistics could provide important information and potentially saves lives.[部分肯定，避免自己陷入绝对化的错误中] Before conclusions about the amount and kinds of investments that should be made in gear are reached, however, a more complete understanding of the benefits are needed.[给出建议，显示出作者思维的完整性和全面性] After all, a false confidence in ineffective gear could be just as dangerous as no gear at all.[首尾呼应]

ahmxwdUID: 2390552

5：

The argument presented is limited but useful.[直接给出作者观点，部分否定体现出思维的严谨] It indicates a possible relationship between a high percentage of accidents and a lack of protective equipment.[对题目的主要内容一笔带过] The statistics cited compel a further investigation of the usefulness of protective gear in preventing or mitigating roller-skating related injuries[点出了题中数据的实际作用].[开头既给出作者自己的观点，又对题目进行了剖析] However, the conclusion that protective gear and reflective equipment would "greatly reduce.risk of being severely injured" is premature[攻击开始]. Data is lacking with reference to the total population of skaters and the relative levels of experience, skill and physical coordination of that population.[首先对最有力的事实论据的片面性开展攻击][内因] It is entirely possible that further research would indicate that most serious injury is averted by the skater's ability to react quickly and skillfully in emergency situations[提出可能的情况和解释].


Another area of investigation necessary before conclusions can be reached is identification of the types of injuries that occur and the various causes of those injuries.[攻击思考不完善][外因，即不同的外部环境有不同的结果] The article fails to identify the most prevalent types of roller-skating related injuries. It also fails to correlate the absence of protective gear and reflective equipment to those injuries.[攻击论据论点联系不足，外因] For example,[用实际的具体例子来进一步说明前面的抽象概念，增加攻击的力度（compelling）] if the majority of injuries are skin abrasions and closed-head injuries, then a case can be made for the usefulness of protective clothing mentioned. Likewise, if injuries are caused by collision with vehicles (e.g. bicycles, cars) or pedestrians, then light-reflective equipment might mitigate the occurences. However, if the primary types of injuries are soft-tissue injuries such as torn ligaments and muscles, back injuries and the like, then a greater case could be made for training and experience as preventative measures.[提出另外可能的情况以及相应措施，实现对题目的延伸和拓展]

ahmxwdUID: 2390552

TOPIC: ISSUE7 - "The video camera provides such an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life that it has become a more important form of documentation than written records."

Our modern society is changing with each passing day, and it gives stimulus to the rapid growth of modern media that has become an important form of documentation. From TV news to advertisements, we can see the visual materials recorded by the camera almost everywhere. However, during the process of our enjoying the visual feast brought about by the media, we cannot omit the usage of and profound influence provided by the records in written materials.
It is said by some people that the time of written records has gone and there comes the empire of modern media, especially the video camera owing to the fact that the camera gives us direct information and feeling easy to accept. But can we say that the information gained directory is also accurate and convincing? Just like whether we should thrust the words of depict heard from other people?
The answer is of course not.
The usage of video camera in the field of recording call for strict requirements: The recorders have to be on the right site and right time to correctly catch the events impending. Unfortunately, these two requirements cannot always be met in our contemporary life. We are not able to know what is going on when the earthquake happened in Haiti and wenchuan from video camera, and also have no idea how the H1N1 virus breakout to name just a few. Unlike written records, we have to get full preparation before things happen if we want to use camera to carry out recording.
Because of the limitation listed above, the video camera can only show us a very small part of the world. As we know, if we want to have a relatively faire and justified judgment of a person, all aspects from personnel abilities to morality should be taken into account. If not doing so, misunderstanding and contradiction will arise without any exception. The same principle applies to our understanding of contemporary life.
Documentation in today's world not only calls for correct information as talked above, but in-depth thoughts and analyses as well.
Information recorded by the video camera is so limited to the surface that people can only have superficial views on our contemporary life. Social culture and social rules and the like hiding behind the image we watched account for dispensable factors needed for the accurate record which can easily be recorded by written materials such as books, magazines, and thesis. It is almost impossible for people to record abstract information with logical meanings with a camera, which is in great demand during our contemporary life.
Every one of us has the experience of feeling deceived by some advertisements we watched from television which gives sound evidence to the fact that visual materials recorded by the camera are not so convincing, let alone those have been falsified deliberately by someone. Ironically, the comments and critics on the faults can usually be found in written records and materials. Our eyes may cheat our brains which can be taken advantage of some government officials to cheat the public by creating and releasing populating videos to reach their own purposes.

Comparing with video materials, those written on paper can explicitly disclose the problems and thoughts that conceal behind the surface of life. Man's wisdom and thoughts which is also a kind of important driving force pushing human to move ahead can only be recorded and found in books or papers instead of videos. Philosophy reflect people's muse on contemporary life and explain rules and natural laws. From Aristotle to Plato, we have the knowledge of their philosophy views on the world by reading books, which helps us to have better understanding of the surroundings and also to form our own values on people, life and the world as a whole. On the contrary video cameras cannot be used to record such complicated thoughts.
Both of these two ways of recording are complimentary to each other, thus we cannot tell which is more important. Video camera gives us direct and vivid knowledge of contemporary life while written records help us to analyses and make judgments on what we have seen. If we want to have accurate and convincing materials, we should depend on all the measures available to us to have complete and profound understandings of modern society.

ahmxwdUID: 2390552

第二次作业

提纲以及参考资料：
28"Students should memorize facts only after they have studied the ideas, trends, and concepts that help explain those facts. Students who have learned only facts have learned very little."
Topic:
Begin
With the development of human civilization which stimulates the growing of the amount of our knowledge learnt from the world that we live nowadays, a lot of facts and elements are bearing specific meanings. In order to ensure students gaining these true meanings and learn the facts as well, a balance between studding the theory (ideas, trends, concepts, etc) and having direct experience during the exploration of the unknown should be emphasized.
Middle:
1.
Theories can lay a sound foundation for the students to have a better understanding of the facts with specialized views which can make them think in a reasonable and effective way.
2.
Whether the efficiency of study in this way remain susceptible. (Rapid development calls for…and also the nature of children…interest as well)
3.
It may be harmful for students to understand the facts with incomprehensive theory in mind which can even lead them in a wrong way.
4.
Having a direct contact with the facts without knowing the theory before can not only give them the vivid image that can give guide to the studying of the concepts but stimulate the interest and motivation of them as well.
5.
There exist some occasion where only facts can be researched.(it’s effect and contribution) (e.g. some inventors; Galileo)
Conclusion:
The effect of study depends on the observing and thinking of the facts around the students, and also personal condition should also be taken into account.


Fact: (from MW dictionary)
fact 1    n.

Pronunciation:	'fakt
Function:	noun
Etymology:	Latin factum, from neuter of factus, past participle of facere
Date:	15th century

1 : a thing done: as a obsolete : FEAT b : CRIME <accessory after the fact> c archaic : ACTION
2 archaic : PERFORMANCE, DOING
3 : the quality of being actual : ACTUALITY <a question of fact hinges on evidence>
4 a : something that has actual existence <space exploration is now a fact> b : an actual occurrence <prove the fact of damage>
5 : a piece of information presented as having objective reality
–in fact : in truth



Galileo: Galileo Galilei  

Galileo Galilei  
——by wikipedia




正文：
TOPIC: ISSUE28 - "Students should memorize facts only after they have studied the ideas, trends, and concepts that help explain those facts. Students who have learned only facts have learned very little."
WORDS: 548
TIME: 00:45:00

With the development of human civilization which stimulates the growing of the amount of our knowledge learnt from the world that we live nowadays, a lot of facts and elements are bearing specific meanings. In order to ensure students gaining these true meanings and learn the facts as well, a balance between studying the theory (such as ideas, trends, concepts, etc) and having direct experience during the exploration of the unknown should be emphasized.
It is true that theories can lay a sound foundation for the students to have a better understanding of the facts with specialized views which can make them think in a reasonable and effective way. The same thing can have totally different meanings to people with and without relative concepts and ideas in mind. Take the exhibition of arts for example; artists can gain much more information from the choosing of motif to ways of painting or carving from simply one piece of article than those customers without concepts who come to the exhibition just for fun. The same applies to the study.
However, albeit the fact that the theory can do some help, the efficiency of study in this way as mentioned in the article remain susceptible. In today's world featuring information booming, every person has to deal with numerous facts. If people require the students to memorize those facts through researching the theory beforehand, possibly, students will be overwhelmed by the large amount of information that leading to anxiety and in the end, hamper them from learning well.
What's more, it may be harmful for students to learn the facts with incomprehensive theory which can even cause misunderstanding of the truth. The Newton laws can be used to explain the principle of moving objects，but these laws is true in the macro world. If students cannot have full command of the concepts, they will be blinded by their limited theory. Unfortunately, it is almost impossible for a student to learn the whole aspects of the concepts before studying the facts.
Having a direct contact with the facts without knowing the theory before can not only offer vivid images that can give guide to the studying of the concepts, trends, and ideas, but stimulate the interest and motivation of them as well. As is known to all, personal interest play a crucial role during the study since it can become a kind of powerful driving force that can make the students concentrate on the work and embolden them when they meet with difficulties.
There exist some occasion where only facts are available to people. Those ideas, trends, and concepts doing great contribution to our further research today come from the direct study and research on the facts existing by human beings. The progress of human beings and increasing of man's knowledge result from some person's exploit on unknown areas that with no theory can be
used or referred to. Newton's discovery of the laws of force bases on the achievements of Galileo who give birth to the theory of force. Absence of ideas and concepts cannot stop Galileo from finding and knowing the truth.
In conclusion, the effect of study depends on the observing and deep thinking of the facts existing around the students, and also, personal condition should also be taken into account.

ahmxwdUID: 2390552

改娃娃衫：https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=1054088&page=2#pid1773544716
改：娃娃衫：https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=1054088&page=1#pid1773544630

fayafayUID: 2743416

With the development of human civilization which stimulates the growing of the amount (accumulation) of our knowledge learnt from the world that we live nowadays, a lot of facts and elements are bearing specific meanings. In order to ensure students gaining these true meanings and learn (learning) the facts as well, a balance between studying the theory (such as ideas, trends, concepts, etc) and having direct experience during the exploration of the unknown should be emphasized. (提出观点)
It is true that theories can lay a sound foundation for the students to have a better understanding of the facts with specialized views which can make them think in a reasonable and effective way. The same thing can have totally different meanings to people with and without relative concepts and ideas in mind. (让步之后提出论点1，但是让步长了点，有点喧宾夺主)Take the exhibition of arts for example; artists can gain much more information from the choosing of motif to ways of painting or carving from simply one piece of article than those customers without concepts who come to the exhibition just for fun. (恕我不才，没看懂= =)The same applies to the study.
However, albeit the fact that the theory can do（offer） some help, the efficiency of study in this way as mentioned in the article remains susceptible.（论点1的分论点1）In today's world featuring (?) information booming, every person has to deal with numerous facts. If people require the students to memorize those facts through researching the theory beforehand, possibly, students will be overwhelmed by the large amount of information that leading (leads) to anxiety and in the end, hampers them from learning well.
What's more, it may be harmful for (to) students to learn the facts with incomprehensive theory which can even cause misunderstanding of the truth.（论点1分论点2） The Newton laws can be used to explain the principle of moving objects，but these laws is true (only) in the macro world. If students cannot have full command of the concepts, they will be blinded by their limited theory. Unfortunately, it is almost impossible for a student to learn the whole aspects of the concepts before studying the facts.（论据好）
Having a direct contact with the facts without knowing the theory before (first) can (will连用了好多个can, 用will替换掉一个吧) not only offer (provides) vivid images that can give guide to the studying of (to guide the students to) the concepts, trends, and ideas, but stimulate the interest and motivation of them (arouses students’ interest and motivation) as well.（论点2分论点1） As is known to all, personal interest plays a crucial role during the study since it can become a kind of powerful driving force that can make the students concentrate on the work and embolden them when they meet with difficulties.
There exist some occasions where only facts are available to people. （论点2分论点2）Those ideas, trends, and concepts doing great contribution to our further research today come from the direct study and research on the facts existing by human beings. The progress of human beings and increasing of man's knowledge result from some person's exploit on unknown areas that with (with which) no theory can be used or referred to. Newton's discovery of the laws of force bases on (are based on) the achievements of Galileo who gives birth to the theory of force. Absence of ideas and concepts cannot stop (prevent) Galileo from finding and knowing the truth.
In conclusion, the effect of study depends on the observing and deep thinking of the facts existing around the students, and also, personal condition should also be taken into account.

在提出论点时，句子复杂了点，不够清晰；句子长了之后，要注意时态和词形

我的备考贴，https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1054293-1-2.html
欢迎pat~

ahmxwdUID: 2390552

liuxingllyUID: 2703703

6# ahmxwd

TOPIC: ISSUE7 - "The video camera provides such an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life that it has become a more important form of documentation than written records."

Our modern society is changing with each passing day, and it gives stimulus to the rapid growth of modern media that has become an important form of documentation. From TV news to advertisements, we can see the visual materials recorded by the camera almost everywhere. However, during the process of our enjoying the visual feast brought about by the media, we cannot omit the usage of and profound influence provided by the records in written materials.
It is said by some people that the time of written records has gone and there comes the empire of modern media, especially the video camera owing to the fact that the camera gives us direct information and feeling easy to accept. But can we say that the information gained directory is also accurate and convincing? Just like whether we should thrust the words of depict heard from other people?
The answer is of course not.
（这段引述写的不错，但是Just like whether we should thrust the words of depict heard from other people?句中的短语感觉怪怪的）

The usage of video camera in the field of recording call for strict requirements: The recorders have to be on the right site and right time to correctly catch the events impending. Unfortunately, these two requirements cannot always be met in our contemporary life. We are not able to know what is going on when the earthquake happened in Haiti and wenchuan from video camera, and also have no idea how the H1N1 virus breakout to name just a few. Unlike written records, we have to get full preparation before things happen if we want to use camera to carry out recording.
Because of the limitation listed above, the video camera can only show us a very small part of the world. As we know, if we want to have a relatively faire and justified judgment of a person, all aspects from personnel？abilities to morality should be taken into account. If not doing so, misunderstanding and contradiction will arise without any exception. The same principle applies to our understanding of contemporary life.
上面两段论述的第一个论点，摄像机不如纸笔方便，能即时记录所发生的生活。汶川海地地震的例子举的比较到位，例子之后用一句话强调这个论点，同时进行比较。然后再跟一段把问题深化。

Documentation in today's world not only calls for correct information as talked above, but in-depth thoughts and analyses as well.递进段
Information recorded by the video camera is so limited to the surface that people can only have superficial views on our contemporary life. Social culture and social rules and the like hiding behind the image we watched account for dispensable factors needed for the accurate record which can easily be recorded by written materials such as books, magazines, and thesis. It is almost impossible for people to record abstract information with logical meanings with a camera, which is in great demand during our contemporary life.
Every one of us has the experience of feeling deceived by some advertisements we watched from television which gives sound evidence to the fact that visual materials recorded by the camera are not so convincing, let alone those have been falsified deliberately by someone. Ironically, the comments and critics on the faults can usually be found in written records and materials. Our eyes may cheat our brains which can be taken advantage of some government officials to cheat the public by creating and releasing populating videos to reach their own purposes.
（此段的内容有些怪怪的，分析了影像资料有欺骗性，但是纸上的记录一样可以是虚假的啊。Ironically, the comments and critics on the faults can usually be found in written records and materials.不太理解这句放在这里的意义）

Comparing with video materials, those written on paper can explicitly disclose the problems and thoughts that conceal behind the surface of life. Man's wisdom and thoughts which is also a kind of important driving force pushing human to move ahead can only be recorded and found in books or papers instead of videos. Philosophy reflect people's muse on contemporary life and explain rules and natural laws. From Aristotle to Plato, we have the knowledge of their philosophy views on the world by reading books, which helps us to have better understanding of the surroundings and also to form our own values on people, life and the world as a whole. On the contrary video cameras cannot be used to record such complicated thoughts.
此段论点鲜明，主题句—论述句—例子—再踩一脚，直观比较，一气呵成。哲学推动社会的这个例子能很好地服务论点。
Both of these two ways of recording are complimentary to each other, thus we cannot tell which is more important. Video camera gives us direct and vivid knowledge of contemporary life while written records help us to analyses and make judgments on what we have seen. If we want to have accurate and convincing materials, we should depend on all the measures available to us to have complete and profound understandings of modern society.

整篇文章结构比较清楚，论点全是否定题目的，但是又有肯定的部分作为让步，应该是比较合理的。在论述的顺序上也是由浅到深，由一个点到一个面。而且写了700多字，论述比较充分。


我感觉写得很复杂了，可能有些地方我也没看懂，说的不对别介意。

ahmxwdUID: 2390552

提纲
Top19
11"All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems."
Begin:
In spite of the rapid development of the world, human beings are always accompanied by some persistent problems in different society throughout history which call for joint efforts of all the people on earth. However, seeking to involve all nations in upholding the development of a so called global university may be neither feasible nor profitable.
Middle:
1、
It is quite easy for people to acknowledge the limitation of individual strength as is taught during childhood and which is also evidenced by real events. (from…to… wenchuan & haiti) but…
2、
Countries that are not quite industrialized are not prosperous and powerful enough to provide significant support to the development of a global university. On the contrary… (Weaken its own national strength)
3、
Some developing countries and those in poverty or starvation as well, prefer attaching their main attention to its national construction to the world persistent social problems. (reason:1.basement for…2.connection 3.feeling unfair)
Conclusion:
The global role of different nations, due to their various national strengths, differ from each other
making it improper to call for all the nations to do some help in dealing with the world's most persistent social problems. As is talked above, unless people in the world can narrow the gap between the rich and the poor, and further improve human nature to become altruism featuring high level of responsibility, all the human beings cannot get united as a whole and work in one mind.

正文<很悲剧>
TOPIC: ISSUE11 - "All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems."
WORDS: 584
TIME: 00:45:00
DATE: 2010/1/27 2:10:47

In spite of the rapid development of the world, human beings are always accompanied by some persistent problems in different country and society throughout history which calls for joint efforts of all the people on earth to work together. However, seeking to involve all nations in upholding the development of a so called global university may be neither feasible nor profitable.
Today, people attach great importance to the spirit of consolidation, since it is quite easy to see the limitation of individual strength which is also taught during everyone’s childhood and evidenced by real events as well. Best shown in people's confronting with natural disasters such as seismic in Wenchuan and Haiti in recent years, the spirit of working together to deal with problems gives full play to personal abilities of people from all walks of life as well as shows the great power of unification among different nations. But whether this stands for the assuming that the more nations get united, the more powerful they will be is the case remains susceptible.
Countries that are not quite industrialized are not prosperous and powerful enough to provide significant support to the development of a global university. On the contrary, this kind of practice can only weaken its own national strength. Obviously, it is not difficult to imagine what will occur to a nation in struggle when it donates its strength and limited resources to further improve the global university: With important resources and money decrease, people in that country will find it hard to survive, thus resort to some extreme measures such as crime, terrorist, etc. In this regard, the persistent social problems confusing mankind become even more prominent.
Besides the objective factors, some developing countries and those in poverty or starvation as well, prefer to attach their main attention to own national construction, rather than to the problems outside. Because one of the basic responsibilities of the government officials is to ensure their people to survive that is also a basement for the future development of the nation. Furthermore, as is known to all: nothing is absolutely isolated from the outside world, and there are always relationships between different objects, and the same applies to the global most persistent social problems. Poor country whose people cannot make their basic needs met will become unstable and a country without stability is sure to bring about a lot of social problems resulting from the gaps between different social classes. What's more, developing countries would think it is quite unfair to give up the opportunity of make great and rapid progress at the cost of overusing nature resources which badly deteriorate the nature environment where they live while at the same time, the developed countries can enjoy the fruit of fast development in this way. Industrial revolution in western countries in history not only greatly stimulates the development of modern technology and industry but also cause serious problem of environmental pollution that people are still suffering today. This is the evidence of undeveloped human nature.
The global role of different nations, due to their various national strengths, differ from each other making it improper to call for all the nations to do some help in dealing with the world's most persistent social problems. As is talked above, unless people in the world can narrow the gap between the rich and the poor, and further improve human nature to become altruism featuring high level of responsibility, all human beings cannot get united as a whole and work in one mind.

ahmxwdUID: 2390552

第三次作业：


提纲：
Top20
212"If a goal is worthy, then any means taken to attain it is justifiable."
Begin:
It is by striving for reaching a series of goals in different period of time that people can make progress and contribution to the development of the society and civilization. In the purpose of pursuing goals, all means available can be taken. However, whether any means is justifiable to the so called worthy goal remain untenable.
Middle:
1.
The ways taken by people may not necessarily lead them to their goals since no one can tell the trend of the process before taking actions to gain direct experience and the information crucial for making judgments. (edu)
2.
Time will not stop its pace of running which call for people’s persistent advancement and progress.(at the cost of … e.g. environment…)(in the long run/lasting)
3.
Means taken to attain a certain goal should not contradict those taken to reach other goals. (since)(e.g. competition &humanity/industrialization & environment) (if not, both will…)
Conclusion:
Instead of taking metaphysics views by separating goals from other facts and concentrating only on attaining one goal, people should take into account the possible future trend as well as rationality of the means taken. Only in this way, can they reduce possible risks as much as possible and maintain the stability of the achievements as well.

jus·ti·fy
v.(by MW dictionary)

transitive verb
1 a : to prove or show to be just, right, or reasonable b (1) : to show to have had a sufficient legal reason (2) : to qualify (oneself) as a surety by taking oath to the ownership of sufficient property
2 a archaic : to administer justice to b archaic : ABSOLVE c : to judge, regard, or treat as righteous and worthy of salvation
3 a : to space (as lines of text) so that the lines come out even at the margin b : to make even by justifying <justified margins>
intransitive verb
1 a : to show a sufficient lawful reason for an act done b : to qualify as bail or surety
2 : to justify lines of text
synonyms see MAINTAIN

–jus·ti·fi·er \-ˌfī(-ə)r\ noun


正文：
TOPIC: ISSUE212 - "If a goal is worthy, then any means taken to attain it is justifiable."


TIME: 00:45:00

It is by striving for reaching a series of goals in different period of time that people can make progress and contribution to the development of the society and civilization. In the pursuit of attaining goals, all means can be taken. However, whether any mean is justifiable to the so called worthy goal remain untenable.
The ways taken by people may not necessarily lead them to their goals since no one can tell the trend of the process before taking actions to gain direct experience and information crucial for making judgments. During educational revolution in some areas aiming to reduce the burden of study on the shoulder of their students, some elementary schools introduce a lot of practical lessons including social service program, while at the same time, broaden the range of test to evaluate the overall ability of a certain students. This kind of way to help students to develop in an all-round way will add the burden of students rather than reduce it. What’s more, too much outclassing activities can badly affect the study of some basic courses such as mathematics, foreign language which is an important foundation for future learning. Similar situation can also be seen in other fields outside education where at some times, ways may lead in a wrong direction.
Time will not stop its pace of running which all for people's persistent advancement and progress. People's striving for a certain goal should not be at the cost of over wasting the resources available because the goal is and will never be the ultimate one, and people have to get prepared for future development based on the current. If not doing so, the achievements will not last long and the efforts made before may be of no use in the end. Even a real worthy goal is only part of the business. It will never be justifiable for someone to reach one goal by unrestricted using of the resources which does great harm to the development in the long run in future.
Means taken to attain a certain goal should not contradict those taken to reach other worthy goals. It is almost impossible for people to attain only one goal and neglect the existence of other ones, since our life is not mono dimensional. All people in the world have to deal with different kinds of problems simultaneously, and goals in different aspects of life are of great importance to lead a harmonious life. In today’s society featuring rapid life tempo, many governments encourage competition among citizens for the purpose of raising national productivity, While at the same time, the cultivation of goodness in humanity is also considered which is also one of the crucial element in civilization. Another example is during the process of industrialization to reach the goal of building a modern society in some developing countries, protection of nature environments is never neglected with the aim of building a sustainable society for the wale fare of future generations. Any worthy goal deserve great efforts make by people which account for a certain indispensible part of the overall development.
Instead of taking metaphysics views by separating goals from other facts and concentrating only on attaining one goal, people should take into account the possible future trend as well as rationality of the means taken. Only in this way, can they reduce possible risks as much as possible and maintain the stability of the achievements as well.

ahmxwdUID: 2390552

改飞雪：https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... age=2#pid1773548137

娃娃衫公主UID: 2677493

第二次作业批改贴
In spite of the rapid development of the world, human beings are always accompanied by some persistent problems in different country and society throughout history which calls for joint efforts of all the people on earth to work together. However, seeking to involve all nations in upholding the development of a so called global university may be neither feasible nor profitable.(提出观点与理由)
Today, people attach great importance to the spirit of consolidation, since it is quite easy to see the limitation of individual strength which is also taught during everyone’s childhood and evidenced by real events as well. Best shown in people's confronting with natural disasters such as seismic in Wenchuan and Haiti in recent years, the spirit of working together to deal with problems gives full play to personal abilities of people from all walks of life as well as shows the great power of unification among different nations. But whether this stands for the assuming that the more nations get united, the more powerful they will be is the case remains susceptible.【个人觉得，这一段的大部分在说团结（团结）就是力量，其中还用了例子~但是实际上与global university的观点不是等价的，况且作为admittedly类型的段，似乎太长了！】

Countries that are not quite industrialized are not prosperous and powerful enough to provide significant support to the development of a global university. On the contrary, this kind of practice can only weaken its own national strength. Obviously, it is not difficult to imagine what will occur to a nation in struggle when it donates its strength and limited resources to further improve the global university: With important resources and money decrease, people in that country will find it hard to survive, thus resort to some extreme measures such as crime, terrorist, etc.【这个推断太主观了，可以当argument了！】 In this regard, the persistent social problems confusing mankind become even more prominent.

Besides the objective factors, some developing countries and those in poverty or starvation as well, prefer to attach their main attention to own national construction, rather than to the problems outside. Because one of the basic responsibilities of the government officials is to ensure their people to survive that is also a basement for the future development of the nation. Furthermore, as is known to all: nothing is absolutely isolated from the outside world, and there are always relationships between different objects, and the same applies to the global most persistent social problems. Poor country whose people cannot make their basic needs met will become unstable and a country without stability is sure to bring about a lot of social problems resulting from the gaps between different social classes. 【这里what’s more 似乎应该换成for example， 发展中国际语与发达中国家的不同造成的在发展与环境上的分歧，好像是further more的那层意思的？】What's more, developing countries would think it is quite unfair to give up the opportunity of make great and rapid progress at the cost of overusing nature resources which badly deteriorate the nature environment where they live while at the same time, the developed countries can enjoy the fruit of fast development in this way. Industrial revolution in western countries in history not only greatly stimulates the development of modern technology and industry but also cause serious problem of environmental pollution that people are still suffering today. This is the evidence of undeveloped human nature.

The global role of different nations, due to their various national strengths, differ from each other making it improper to call for all the nations to do some help in dealing with the world's most persistent social problems. As is talked above, unless people in the world can narrow the gap between the rich and the poor, and further improve human nature to become altruism featuring high level of responsibility, all human beings cannot get united as a whole and work in one mind.

不知道是不是我的理解有误，我觉得题目中的university就是大学的意思，但是我在你的文章中很少看到针对“大学”特性的讨论， 似乎中心更加倾向于讨论能否找到共同解决方法。

你的文章开头与结尾都很formal，明显训练有素。

但是第二段我还是持有保留意见。第四段很赞，除了我觉得过渡的那个地方的问题。当然这关乎第四段的结构和部分意思。大家还可以共同~~