[a习作temp] Argument55 [ARGU处女作啊~请各位帮我看看吧！感激] [复制链接]

BiteOrange
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发表于 2010-2-13 15:02:24 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

本帖最后由 BiteOrange 于 2010-2-14 10:04 编辑

TOPIC: ARGUMENT55 - The following appeared in a Letter to the Editor of the Shady Village newspaper.

"Commuters are complaining that the rush hour traffic on Blue Highway between Shady Village and Bright City has doubled their commuting time. Some commuters have asked that an additional traffic lane be built, but the recent creation of such a lane on nearby Green Highway apparently attracted more commuters, judging from the fact that rush-hour traffic jams actually increased there this past winter. To reduce rush-hour traffic on Blue Highway, a bicycle lane should be added instead of a traffic lane. This approach will succeed because many citizens of Shady Village are avid bicyclists; 75 percent of respondents to a recent questionnaire distributed there said they would like to bicycle more hours per week than they currently do."
WORDS: 525
TIME: 00:30:00
DATE: 2010-2-12 11:28:17

In this argument, the arguer recommends building a bicycle lane instead of traffic lane to reduce the rush-hour traffic jams in Blue Highway. To support his suggestion, the arguer cites the worsen traffic situation in Blue Highway now, and the increased rush-hour traffic jams after new traffic lane constructed last winter. He also cites the survey showing the public's tendency to bicycle more. However, the recommendation contains several unconvincing assumptions and logical flaws.

Firstly, the increasing traffic jams during rush-hour in Green Highway may not have a causal relation with the newly constructed traffic lane. The author omits several other important factors that will lead to the same result, for example, the growing newly licensed drivers, the worsen road condition in winter. Perhaps in winter, due to the snow or any kind of bad climate, the road is too slippery to drive fast, thus the low average speed causes the traffic jams. Without ruling out these possibilities, the arguer cannot establish a causal relation between the newly built traffic lane in Green Highway and ill traffic conditions.

Secondly, the arguer fails to convince me that the same situation will happen in Blue Highway after the traffic lane is constructed, without evidence concerning the differences between the two highways. Perhaps the Blue Highway has a larger capacity handling massive traffic flows than the Green Highway, or perhaps the Blue Highway has relatively fewer cars than in Green Highway.

Thirdly, lacking evidence about whether citizens of Bright City are valid bicyclists and the number of bicyclists in either city, it is hard to evaluate the effectiveness of the newly built bicycle lane. It is possible that few people in Bright City can ride bicycles. Or even most people in Bright City do, the populations of the Shady Village might be relatively small, thus the few valid bicyclists in sum still. Without evidence about these situations, I highly doubt whether the constructing of the bicycle lane is effective for improving the traffic condition..

Finally, the survey about the respondents' opinion is not statistically reliable or persuasive. The arguer fails to ruling out the chance that, people who favor riding bicycle tend to respond more than the others. If it is the case, then the people responded may not be representative of the general residences of the two cities. What is more, the tendency people would like to bicycle more do not necessarily means a preference to ride during rush hours. It is common sense that most people favors bicycling as a exercise, considering the air fulfilled with waste gases during the noisy rush hour, it is hard to believe one may ride on the highway risking the damage to his health.

To sum up, the arguer fails to show that building a additional bicycle lane instead of a traffic lane is feasible and sufficient to solve the traffic jams during the rush hour. The arguer has to raise evidence about the differences about the two different highways and indicates that it is the newly traffic lane, rather than other factors, such as climate, leads to the worsen traffic situation in Green Highway. The arguer also has to investigate both bicyclists number in two cities and establish convincing survey indicating that more people would bicycle during rush hour.

第一次写，很多地方都用了一些模板
准备的时间不多了，3月4日就要机考了
各位GGJJ能帮我指出一些要改进的地方吗？
这样我之后自己改起来就可以多有一些根据了...实在感谢~~！