草根修改铺(楼主不在）

bzr2915UID：2612029

楼下继续上面顺序比较乱，从这里继续，大家注意占完楼，改的习作直接编辑在占楼贴中 --!小白问题..
看这里 下一篇为150楼HANWENXI 小盆友的 ~
小女的issue130请楼下多指教啊，主要是用词方面
130"How children are socialized today determines the destiny of society. Unfortunately, we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring about a better society." 1
I concede that socialization, defined in terms of adapting to and emerging into a society and being more cooperative with other persons, plays a more pivotal role in modern society than ever before, and even influences the destiny of society to some extent.

Socialization effects the behaviors of our next generation by demonstrating the techniques and skills dealing with real-world events outside the examples of principles and theories discussed in textbooks. One need look no further than students in kindergarten where certain potentially changes are acting on children through the process of getting known to their teachers and fellows of the kids in daily life. They could actively find the role of themselves in the collective, realize gradually what sort of means to make others accept their viewpoints readily, recognize whether a girl or a boy could be made friends with, figure out how to attain others’ respect among own classmates. This seemly juvenile method of education have indeed assisted children to set the position of themselves in the society and pursue the objective of satisfying their own need of emotions, respects and sense of self-actualization, thereby ensure that the kids would be able to communicate, negotiate or even cooperate successfully with others in the future and finally work together with other people to construct the society in a more reasonable, tolerant and respectful style. Consider IBM and Microsoft's success. All the qualified technicians, skilled officers and excellent leaders make a concerted effort to ensure the development and survival of the enterprise. In a word, socialization of children is definitely to become an essential determinant of the destiny of our world.
However, socialization is not the only factor which ultimately determines the extent an individual will contribute to a better society and it is even not the most significant one, nevertheless there are some other significant factors influence the next generation and the future of our world, such as the quality of members in a society, parental influence, personal raw intelligence, spirit character and specific experience, etc. Imagine that how Helen Keller could receive the same ordinary education as other children as a girl with blindness and become integrated with others. In the considerate inculcating of her family tutor, Keller could gradually read books on her own by learning language printed in Braille, even though without the formal education system. Finally, she published her own work as one of the most excellent women in the world in adulthood. Those accomplishments cannot be credited by the socialization in her childhood, yet in the end she turns into a model role ,and even the symbol of contemporary life of thousands and millions of people not mere a person who is able to devote to society, by her raw intelligence, special life experience, both the resolution and courage to face up to the physical handicap. Consequently, socialization is only one factor that destiny of society depends on.


Obviously, the speaker’s claim that we have not yet learned how to raise children who can better society is a bit over pessimistic.
In my view, although today's education is not as satisfied as people has expected, it is making great efforts in raising children who can help bring out better society by facilitating their consciousness of social responsibility If we define a “better” society as one characterized by greater tolerance, respect and cooperation with others. We can view these young people as being more sensitive to and respectful of the women, various ethnic and racial groups, homosexual, etc and besides taking on greater cooperation across cultural and national boundaries，such as diminishing the proliferation of Ozone Hole.
Moreover, query the assertion that we have not yet been able to educate children under the fact that we should be proud of various civilization achievements.
In most circumstances, the accomplishments achieved now should be owed to every citizen who devote themselves to society, however those people were largely cultivated by our mainstream education system. We cannot deny the obvious fact that we advance in a vast of areas in both science and humanity and those accomplishments have greatly ameliorated the process of how to raise children of integrated personality.
In conclusion, socialization merely act as one of the determinants of society’s destiny, besides that, our society have already learned how to educate an individual who could make contribution to our world.

mailantUID：2556159

I concede that socialization, defined in terms of adapting to and emerging into（该词的使用有待商榷） a society and being more cooperative with other persons, plays a more pivotal role in modern society than ever before, and even influences the destiny of society to some extent.

Socialization effects the behaviors of our next generation by demonstrating（用这个词似乎不太欠当） the techniques and skills dealing with real-world events outside the examples of principles and theories discussed in textbooks. One need look no further than students in kindergarten where certain potentially changes are acting on children through the process of getting known to their teachers and fellows of the kids in daily life. They could actively find the role of themselves in the collective, realize gradually what sort of means to make others accept their viewpoints readily, recognize whether a girl or a boy could be made friends with each other（添加）, figure out how to attain others’ respect among own classmates. This seemly juvenile method of education have indeed assisted children to set the position of themselves in the society and pursue the objective of satisfying their own need of emotions, respects and sense of self-actualization, thereby ensure that the kids would be able to communicate, negotiate or even cooperate successfully with others in the future and finally work together with other people to construct the society in a more reasonable, tolerant and respectful style. Consider IBM and Microsoft's success. All the qualified technicians, skilled officers and excellent leaders make a concerted effort to ensure the development and survival of the enterprise. In a word, socialization of children is definitely to become an essential determinant of the destiny of our world.
However, socialization is not the only factor which ultimately determines the extent an individual will contribute to a better society and it is even not the most significant one, nevertheless there are some other significant factors influence the next generation and the future of our world, such as the quality of members in a society, parental influence, personal raw intelligence, spirit character and specific experience, etc. Imagine that how Helen Keller could receive the same ordinary education as other children as a girl with blindness and become integrated with others. In the considerate inculcating of her family tutor, Keller could gradually read books on her own by learning language printed in Braille, even though without the formal education system. Finally, she published her own work as one of the most excellent women in the world in adulthood. Those accomplishments cannot be credited by the socialization in her childhood, yet in the end she turns into a model role ,and even the symbol of contemporary life of thousands and millions of people not mere a person who is able to devote to society, by her raw intelligence, special life experience, both the resolution and courage to face up to the physical handicap. Consequently, socialization is only one factor that destiny of society depends on.


Obviously, the speaker’s claim that we have not yet learned how to raise children who can better society is a bit over pessimistic.
In my view, although today's education is not as satisfied as people has expected, it is making great efforts in raising children who can help bring out better society by facilitating their consciousness of social responsibility If we define a “better” society as one characterized by greater tolerance, respect and cooperation with others. We can view these young people as being more sensitive to and respectful of the women, various ethnic and racial groups, homosexual, etc and besides taking on greater cooperation across cultural and national boundaries，such as diminishing the proliferation of Ozone Hole.
Moreover, query the assertion that we have not yet been able to educate children under the fact that we should be proud of various civilization achievements.
In most circumstances, the accomplishments achieved now should be owed to every citizen who devote themselves to society, however those people were largely cultivated by our mainstream education system. We cannot deny the obvious fact that we advance in a vast of areas in both science and humanity and those accomplishments have greatly ameliorated the process of how to raise children of integrated personality.
In conclusion, socialization merely act as one of the determinants of society’s destiny, besides that, our society have already learned how to educate an individual who could make contribution to our world.

作者的文笔非常好，实在难得找出什么问题，就我个人浅薄的作文水平看，该文可以当范文，值得大家好好学习。

mailantUID：2556159

94 "Universities should require every student to take a variety of courses outside the student's field of study because acquiring knowledge of various academic disciplines is the best way to become truly educated."
大学应该要求学生学习本专业以外的课程，因为让学生们了解不同学科的知识才是教育的最佳方式。
The essence of education lies in that it provides an opportunity for the individuals to realize their potential capacity. That's the reason why the speaker claims that gaining knowledge from various subjects is the best way to become truly educated, for only through attending a variety of courses outside the student's own field can every student know which subjects is best suit and interest them, and at the same time, as the enhancement of complexity of current problems, more and more issues can be understood only in the context of a variety of disciplines. Based on the above two arguments, my view on this issue coincide closely with the speaker. Yet, strictly speaking, although the opinion of speaker appears rigorous, there are still a few small loopholes which should be considered thoroughly, if "the best way" can be substitute for "one of the best way" in the conclusion, it would be more well-reasoned and persuasive.

To begin with, one compelling argument in favor of my view involves with the fact that students usually have no idea about which field best interest them before attending a college, they basically choose their major at random. However, as an old saying goes, interest is the best teacher. If the student doesn't like his/her major, how can we believe that the student will pay more attention to learn it? Only when they really in contact with all kinds of subjects, they can make sure which field deserving them to devote all their efforts to achieve it, that's the real goal of education. For supporting examples one need look no further than Lee Kai-Fu, former vice president of Google. When he enrolled in the university, he selected his major at random as his peers. Regretfully, Lee felt no interest in his discipline; nevertheless, he prefers to attend classes of other departments instead of dejected learning his own subjects. Through attending a variety of courses Lee found he loved computer science, then he transferred to computer department. Without this kind of experience, Lee Kai-Fu would not realize his potential on computer, and surely would not success in his career. From this instance we can clearly realized that how important to acquire knowledge of various academic subjects in the university.

Furthermore, take into consideration of another argument in that the more courses one attend, the more probably one could unravel problems that need interdisciplinary knowledge. As the development of social and technology, the resolving of many problems no longer confined only in one or two fields. A law school student may bogged down when deals with economic case without understanding basic economic knowledge. An architecture student should grasp the geology and mechanics for being an excellent architecture student. It's inconceivable that without attending a great number of courses outside the student's major, the student could be excelled at his/her major field, and the signal of truly education lies in whether it could cultivate distinguished student. Accordingly, we have to acknowledge that acquire knowledge of various academic disciplines is the real way to become truly educated.

Notwithstanding the preceding contentions aptly support that student attend a variety of courses outside the student's field of study to become truly educated, modifying one point would make the conclusion more perfect, namely to substitute "the best way" to "one of the best way". For as we all know, the way to the truly education is not just confined to require student acquiring knowledge about a various of courses, training student keep a certain skepticism to what they study, and applying the theory we learned into practice are all a good way to become truly educated. It's hard to assert which way is the best. Therefore, claiming that acquiring knowledge of various academic disciplines is one of the best ways to become truly educated is more reasonable.

To sum up, one flaw cannot obscure the virtues, although there exited loophole in the judgment, on the whole, we have to concede that for students found their real interests and broaden their professional view, acquiring knowledge from a variety of discipline is essentially important.

佐罗123UID：2776369

154# mailant

94 "Universities should require every student to take a variety of courses outside the student's field of study because acquiring knowledge of various academic disciplines is the best way to become truly educated."
大学应该要求学生学习本专业以外的课程，因为让学生们了解不同学科的知识才是教育的最佳方式。
The essence of education lies in that it provides an opportunity for the individuals to realize their potential capacity. That's the reason why the speaker claims that gaining knowledge from various subjects is the best way to become truly educated, for only through attending a variety of courses outside the student's own field can every student know which subjects is best suit and interest them, and at the same time, as the enhancement of complexity of current problems, more and more issues can be understood only in the context of a variety of disciplines. Based on the above two arguments, my view on this issue coincide closely with the speaker. Yet, strictly speaking, although the opinion of speaker appears rigorous, there are still a few small loopholes which should be considered thoroughly, if "the best way" can be substitute for "one of the best way" in the conclusion, it would be more well-reasoned and persuasive.

To begin with, one compelling argument in favor of my view involves with the fact that students usually have no idea about which field best interest them before attending a college, they basically choose their major at random. However, as an old saying goes, interest is the best teacher. If the student doesn't like his/her major, how can we believe that the student will pay more attention to learn it? Only when they really in contact with all kinds of subjects, they can make sure which field deserving them to devote all their efforts to achieve it, that's the real goal of education. For supporting examples one need look no further than Lee Kai-Fu, former vice president of Google. When he enrolled in the university, he selected his major at random as his peers. Regretfully, Lee felt no interest in his discipline; nevertheless, he prefers to attend classes of other departments instead of dejected learning his own subjects. Through attending a variety of courses Lee found he loved computer science, then he transferred to computer department. Without this kind of experience, Lee Kai-Fu would not realize his potential on computer, and surely would not success in his career. From this instance we can clearly realized that how important to acquire knowledge of various academic subjects in the university.

Furthermore, take into consideration of another argument in that the more courses one attend, the more probably one could unravel problems that need interdisciplinary knowledge. As the development of social and technology, the resolving of many problems no longer confined only in one or two fields. A law school student may bogged down when deals with economic case without understanding basic economic knowledge. An architecture student should grasp the geology and mechanics for being an excellent architecture student. It's inconceivable that without attending a great number of courses outside the student's major, the student could be excelled at his/her major field, and the signal of truly education lies in whether it could cultivate distinguished student. Accordingly, we have to acknowledge that acquire knowledge of various academic disciplines is the real way to become truly educated.

Notwithstanding the preceding contentions aptly support that student attend a variety of courses outside the student's field of study to become truly educated, modifying one point would make the conclusion more perfect, namely to substitute "the best way" to "one of the best way". For as we all know, the way to the truly education is not just confined to require student acquiring knowledge about a various of courses, training student keep a certain skepticism to what they study, and applying the theory we learned into practice are all a good way to become truly educated. It's hard to assert which way is the best. Therefore, claiming that acquiring knowledge of various academic disciplines is one of the best ways to become truly educated is more reasonable.

To sum up, one flaw cannot obscure the virtues, although there exited loophole in the judgment, on the whole, we have to concede that for students found their real interests and broaden their professional view, acquiring knowledge from a variety of discipline is essentially important.

就我个人来说 楼上这篇抵得上范文了~~ 缩写的不要

一点小小的建议就是第一段精简下或许会好些，同时末端加长小小

有谁改我的……555

佐罗123UID：2776369

TOPIC: ISSUE208 - "The way people look, dress, and act reveals their attitudes and interests. You can tell much about a society's ideas and values by observing the appearance and behavior of its people."
WORDS: 436          TIME: 00:39:32      

By observing the appearance and behavior of the people can help us to study the ideas and values about a society for the people’s action and appearance can reveals their thoughts, as the author claims. I agree with it to some extents and also we need to look into other factors in order to know a society thoroughly.

The appearance of people shows the trends and customs of a society for the values of the society always set up rules that people should wear designated kinds of clothes. For example the French dress openly and fashionable while the Arabian women wear veils to cover their faces. We can easily conclude that the style of the wears could reflect the customs and spirits of the society. Also we can see in different eras people dress differently. In ancient China ordinary people wore long sleeves coats and then in the 1950s people were in favor of Zhongshan Uniform which was designed but Sun Yetsen, the leader of modern revolution, and now, people learn to absorb the trend from outside especially Japan and Western fashion. It is obvious that Chinese people are being in touch with the globe more and more frequently. Hence the appearance of its people could tell much about a society.

Moreover, the behavior of its people is another important factor in society research. In every society there are typical spirits and values of life which are widely shared and accepted by its citizen. For supporting example when the tragic "911" happened, the Chinese Chairman Jiang Zeming was the first leader to contact with President Bush on behalf of billions of Chinese people to show our concern. And this is a particular symbol that the sympathy is deeply rooted in them. Also when the Haiti earthquake ruined numerous houses and caused heavy loses of lives and possession, the rescue teams from many countries are immediately on their ways to spare no effort to help.

Last but not least, when studying a society we should take many other factors into consideration such as history and religion belief. Appearance and behavior may be the crucial elements but they do not establish the whole complete social ideas and values. By studying the German history we can learn that Germans are serious and stick to rules and principles strictly. By checking the history of France we can see they take freedom as the most fundamental respects of life. As a saying goes, as I paraphrase, a person cannot live without freedom.

In sum, appearance and behavior can show much of the social spirits and values, while we cannot ignore the other essential elements for instance history and customs.

星华月影UID：2632876

改154楼朋友的
The essence of education lies in that it provides an opportunity for the individuals to realize their potential capacity. That's the reason why the speaker claims that gaining knowledge from various subjects is the best way to become truly educated, for only through attending a variety of courses outside the student's own field can every student know which subjects is best suit and interest them, and at the same time, as the enhancement of complexity of current problems, more and more issues can be understood only in the context of a variety of disciplines. Based on the above two arguments, my view on this issue coincide closely with the speaker. Yet, strictly speaking, although the opinion of speaker appears rigorous, there are still a few small loopholes which should be considered thoroughly, if "the best way" can be substitute for "one of the best way" in the conclusion, it would be more well-reasoned and persuasive.

To begin with, one compelling argument in favor of my view involves with the fact that students usually have no idea about which field best interest them before attending a college, they basically choose their major at random. However, as an old saying goes, interest is the best teacher. If the student doesn't like his/her major, how can we believe that the student will pay more attention to learn it? Only when they really in contact with all kinds of subjects, they can make sure which field deserving them to devote all their efforts to achieve it, that's the real goal of education. For supporting examples one need look no further than Lee Kai-Fu, former vice president of Google. When he enrolled in the university, he selected his major at random as his peers. Regretfully, Lee felt no interest in his discipline; nevertheless, he prefers to attend classes of other departments instead of dejected learning his own subjects. Through attending a variety of courses Lee found he loved computer science, then he transferred to computer department. Without this kind of experience, Lee Kai-Fu would not realize his potential on computer, and surely would not success in his career. From this instance we can clearly realized that how important to acquire knowledge of various academic subjects in the university.

Furthermore, take into consideration of another argument in that the more courses one attend, the more probably one could unravel problems that need interdisciplinary knowledge. As the development of social and technology, the resolving of many problems no longer confined only in one or two fields. A law school student may bogged down when deals with economic case without understanding basic economic knowledge. An architecture student should grasp the geology and mechanics for being an excellent architecture student. It's(最好别用缩写) inconceivable that without attending a great number of courses outside the student's major, the student could be excelled at his/her major field, and the signal of truly education lies in whether it could cultivate distinguished student. Accordingly, we have to acknowledge that acquire knowledge of various academic disciplines is the real way to become truly educated.

Notwithstanding the preceding contentions aptly support that student attend a variety of courses outside the student's field of study to become truly educated, modifying one point would make the conclusion more perfect, namely to substitute "the best way" to "one of the best way". For as we all know, the way to the truly education is not just confined to require student acquiring knowledge about a various of courses, training student keep a certain skepticism to what they study, and applying the theory we learned into practice are all a good way to become truly educated. It's hard to assert which way is the best. Therefore, claiming that acquiring knowledge of various academic disciplines is one of the best ways to become truly educated is more reasonable.

To sum up, one flaw cannot obscure the virtues, although there exited loophole in the judgment, on the whole, we have to concede that for students found their real interests and broaden their professional view, acquiring knowledge from a variety of discipline is essentially important.

个人觉得这篇文章很不错，结构严密，词语多变，句式丰富，我还从这篇文章里收集了一些词语和举行^_^
但是我觉得最后一段在论述会不会短了一点，作者只是提出了这两个方向可以成为真正的教育，但是到底怎么成为的需要稍微论述一下。比如在加一个从句说二者都可以培养出distinguished students， 这样刚好也可以和作者的主题相呼应。个人遇见，仅供参考。

星华月影UID：2632876

我自己的
TOPIC: ISSUE31 - "Money spent on research is almost always a good investment, even when the results of that research are controversial."
I fundamentally agree with the speaker's broad assertion that money spent on research is generally a valuable investment. However, while ignoring certain compelling reasons why these researches might be improper, the author unfairly extends the broad assertion to embrace the research which would cause a "controversial" result. My points of contention with the author involve the criterion of assessing the value of a research and I will discuss each of them in turn.

To begin with, since the worth of a research would be counteracted by its controversial result, the investment might be useless or even detrimental.
History informs us that science and technology in every subjects, fields or realms is always a double-edged sword which might cause severe or slight side effects while enhancing the social well-being. But, the value of a research is reflected by the disparity between the positive effects and the negative ones.
For supporting evidence, one should look no further than reproductive cloning of human beings. I concede, in terms of science, that this kind of technology contains significant potential value. But, when we look deeper and further we might discover that it could contribute to numerous problems involve legal, society and ethic. To be exact the copies of human also should possess the right to social welfare, the right to education, the right to be respected and equally treated, and all other human rights. In other words, they should not be merely seen as suppliers who provide the most suitable healthy organs to the cloned human being. If so, it might throw a social cataclysm which is definitely greater than the problems it solves, and the morality of human beings is certainly vanished. This example demonstrates that whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages serves as a major criterion to determine the money goes where.

To the contrary, in my point of view, a research that deserves a large amount of investment should have at least one of two characters as discussed below.

Firstly, the urgent need for the results of research is of significant use when it comes to attracting investment. For example, in 2003 and 2009 the world respectively experienced an outbreak of SARS and H1N1virus which brought great panics to the world and direly threaten the survival of human beings. In this circumstance, the government of every nation actively adopted measures to cure patients infected by virus and prevent broader infection, during which millions of dollars is invested into the research of vaccine against the virus. From this instance we can clearly realized that for the purpose of solving pressing problems, spending money in research is valuable.

Secondly, if the result of a science research could offer people an excellent solution for a problem that affects large quantities of people, the technology always earns a wide range of popularity in the world. Take the issues of environment protection and energy as examples. Nowadays, people as whole are confronting a deficiency of traditional fossil fuel, because considerable exploiture and usage during the past century, which also causes the global climate change which might bring catastrophe to human beings. Just think about the dinosaurs! Under these phenomena, the investment to the new energy resources, such as solar power and wind power which are renewable and more environmental friendly, is advisable. Accordingly, we have to acknowledge that for the sake of benefiting the whole human beings, we should not be misers

To sum up, in accordance of the analysis above, we may conclude that in evaluating the worth of investment in a research one should consider the consequences and effects it might cause including both negative and positive ones. To the controversial research, people should always hold a conservative and cautious view, while to the predictably beneficial ones people should be supportive.

suchana03UID：2764281

占座改楼上的
To begin with, since the worth of a research would be counteracted by its controversial result, the investment might be useless or even detrimental.
History informs us that science and technology in every subjects, fields or realms (前面三个名词用单数)is always a double-edged sword which might cause severe or slight side effects while enhancing the social well-being. But, the value of a research is reflected by the disparity between the positive effects and the negative ones.
For supporting evidence, one should look no further than reproductive cloning of human beings. I concede, in terms of science, that this kind of technology contains significant potential value. （再细化）But, when we look deeper and further we might discover that it could contribute to numerous problems involve legal, society and ethic. To be exact the copies of human also should possess the right to social welfare, the right to education, the right to be respected and equally treated, and all other human rights. In other words, they should not be merely seen as suppliers who provide the most suitable healthy organs to the cloned human being. If so, it might throw a social cataclysm which is definitely greater than the problems it solves, and the morality of human beings is certainly vanished. This example demonstrates that whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages serves as a major criterion to determine the money goes where.
（例子有点大众化，论证的时候不够细化，可以对例子的内容再充实些）
To the contrary, in my point of view, a research that deserves a large amount of investment should have at least one of two characters as discussed below.

Firstly, the urgent need for the results of research is of significant use when it comes to attracting investment. For example, in 2003 and 2009 the world respectively experienced an outbreak of SARS and H1N1virus which brought great panics to the world and direly threaten the survival of human beings. In this circumstance, the government of every nation actively adopted measures to cure patients infected by virus and prevent broader infection, during which millions of dollars is invested into the research of vaccine against the virus. From this instance we can clearly realized that for the purpose of solving pressing problems, spending money in research is valuable.
（和controversial有什么关系呢？）
Secondly, if the result of a science research could offer people an excellent solution for a problem that affects large quantities of people, the technology always earns a wide range of popularity in the world. Take the issues of environment protection and energy as examples. Nowadays, people as whole are confronting a deficiency of traditional fossil fuel, because considerable exploiture and usage during the past century, which also causes(the) global climate change which might bring catastrophe to human beings. Just think about the dinosaurs!(和dinosaur有什么关系呢？) Under these phenomena, the investment to the new energy resources, such as solar power and wind power which are renewable and more environmental friendly, is advisable. Accordingly, we have to acknowledge that for the sake of benefiting the whole human beings, we should not be misers

To sum up, in accordance of the analysis above, we may conclude that in evaluating the worth of investment in a research one should consider the consequences and effects it might cause including both negative and positive ones. To the controversial research, people should always hold a conservative and cautious view, while to the predictably beneficial ones people should be supportive.
后面两段的论证和题目关键词比如controversial好像关系不大，另外有小的语法错误，改了基础，作者写完后可以自己多读几遍就能检查出来。

suchana03UID：2764281

TOPIC: ISSUE25 - "Anyone can make things bigger and more complex. What requires real effort and courage is to move in the opposite direction-in other words, to make things as simple as possible."

    I agree that people can make things bigger and more complex, which indicates an increase in knowledge. However, sometimes, it is making things simpler that requires real effort, because that calls for wisdom and insight which enable us to simplify knowledge in one field---not oversimplified though, after all too simple knowledge amounts to little---and be better equipped all-around.
    Admittedly and indisputably, people can and tend to make things more complex, especially in one area. Since we are specialized in higher education, we spend most of the time delving into our major, keeping pace with the latest development in the field and trying to be a real specialist in this field eventually. As a result, we know more, and the knowledge system of this particular field in our mind especially develops, becoming more complicated and enabling us to see great depth in this area.
Nevertheless, complex views in one area may hamper our overall development, which necessitates simplifying things in one area and spending time on others. As a result, we need courage to stop incessant inquiry into one special point and should instead take effort to discover what else is needed, After all, the simple we make things, the more other things we can make, given the same amount of energy and time.
For instance, a student learning a foreign language, say Chinese, spend a large quantity of time on memorizing numerous characters. Unless he wants to be an expert in the Chinese language or wants to read classic Chinese that requires extraordinary storage of Chinese characters, he is likely to waste most of his time making his memory complex, for the reason that the number of most commonly used Chinese characters is no more than two thousand. As a result, if he just has the courage to lessen the effort he spend on making his network of knowledge on Chinese simpler---surely on condition that he has just enough which guarantees no oversimplification---and take some effort to acquire knowledge in another field, say perhaps another language, not only his storage of knowledge would increase but also his competence in job market is likely to be improved along the way. Though complex knowledge system in one specialized area enables a person to become leader in that field more easily and everyone has the potential to do so since each of us in high education has a major and as long as we are devoted we each have the potential to make the bulk of our knowledge bigger and relevant knowledge system more complex, real and sometimes worthy effort lies in simplifying our major that can spare us some time to learn from other fields. After all, in today’s world where efficiency and reduction of costs are constantly highlighted, one who masters two skills is more likely to be outstanding and attractive because he is able to finish a task that originally requires two persons’ efforts. Therefore, effort to simplify knowledge is sometimes needed and worthwhile, for it frees us from unnecessary complex system and provides us chances to gain new knowledge.
In sum, if we can just have courage to simplify our knowledge system according to the real needs and use the additional energy to learn more in other fields, we can be more competent afterwards.

bzr2915UID：2612029

改 155楼 佐罗123~
TOPIC: ISSUE208 - "The way people look, dress, and act reveals their attitudes and interests. You can tell much about a society's ideas and values by observing the appearance and behavior of its people."
WORDS: 436          TIME: 00:39:32      

By observing the appearance and behavior of the people can help us to study the ideas and values about a society for the people’s action and appearance can reveals their thoughts, as the author claims. I agree with it to some extents and also we need to look into other factors in order to know a society thoroughly.

The appearance of people shows the trends and customs of a society for the values of the society always set up rules that people should wear (我觉得这里应该限定一下，有些社会是这样的，作为一个中国人或者美国人社会并没有对衣着有什么特殊要求，这里太泛泛，影响了逻辑的缜密）designated kinds of clothes. For example the French dress openly and fashionable（这个例子不当，法国人就一定都穿时尚的？） while the Arabian women wear veils to cover their faces.（这个例子就很恰当） We can easily conclude that the style of the wears could reflect the customs and spirits of the society.（你前文只说了不同社会有不同的衣着习惯，关于反映社会风俗和精神并没有讨论，衣服到底放映了什么样的社会IDEAS？这个点拿出来详细一下） Also we can see in different eras people dress differently. In ancient China ordinary people wore long sleeves coats and then in the 1950s people were in favor of Zhongshan Uniform which was designed but Sun Yetsen, the leader of modern revolution, and now, people learn to absorb the trend from outside especially Japan and Western fashion. It is obvious that Chinese people are being in touch with the globe more and more frequently. （像这样）Hence the appearance of its people could tell much about a society.（虽然有一点论述，但这一段你大多去写不同时代，不同社会人们的衣着不同，对于反应了什么样的社会IDEAS并没有细说，我决的重点应该落在这里）

Moreover, the behavior of its people is another important factor in society research. In every society there are typical spirits and values of life which are widely shared and accepted by its citizen. For supporting example when the tragic "911" happened, the Chinese Chairman Jiang Zeming was the first leader to contact with President Bush on behalf of billions of Chinese people to show our concern. And this is a particular symbol that the sympathy is deeply rooted in them. Also when the Haiti earthquake ruined numerous houses and caused heavy loses of lives and possession, the rescue teams from many countries are immediately on their ways to spare no effort to help. （没有看到这两个例子如何支撑论点的，充其量体现了我国人民和世界人民的爱心，同情心，放这里和每个社会有自己典型的价值精神体系有啥关系？你再推敲一下）

Last but not least, when studying a society we should take many other factors into consideration such as history and religion belief. Appearance and behavior may be the crucial elements but they do not establish the whole complete social ideas and values.（这里完了应该说接下来有哪些因素同样可以反映社会IDEAS，比如说历史..) By studying the German history we can learn that Germans are serious and stick to rules and principles strictly. By checking the history of France we can see they take freedom as the most fundamental respects of life. As a saying goes, as I paraphrase, a person cannot live without freedom.(画蛇添足的句子）

In sum, appearance and behavior can show much of the social spirits and values（这个东西应该是全文的重点）, while we cannot ignore the other essential elements（这个东西你没有展开说明，到底有哪些因素，既然用了复数不可能就一个吧？） for instance history and customs.

注意对题目关键词的把握，提个苛刻点的建议，思想在深刻一点。

bzr2915UID：2612029

看这里，下一篇为160楼 suchanna03童鞋的 楼下继续~
TOPIC: ISSUE25 - "Anyone can make things bigger and more complex. What requires real effort and courage is to move in the opposite direction-in other words, to make things as simple as possible."

    I agree that people can make things bigger and more complex, which indicates an increase in knowledge. However, sometimes, it is making things simpler that requires real effort, because that calls for wisdom and insight which enable us to simplify knowledge in one field---not oversimplified though, after all too simple knowledge amounts to little---and be better equipped all-around.
    Admittedly and indisputably, people can and tend to make things more complex, especially in one area. Since we are specialized in higher education, we spend most of the time delving into our major, keeping pace with the latest development in the field and trying to be a real specialist in this field eventually. As a result, we know more, and the knowledge system of this particular field in our mind especially develops, becoming more complicated and enabling us to see great depth in this area.
Nevertheless, complex views in one area may hamper our overall development, which necessitates simplifying things in one area and spending time on others. As a result, we need courage to stop incessant inquiry into one special point and should instead take effort to discover what else is needed, After all, the simple we make things, the more other things we can make, given the same amount of energy and time.
For instance, a student learning a foreign language, say Chinese, spend a large quantity of time on memorizing numerous characters. Unless he wants to be an expert in the Chinese language or wants to read classic Chinese that requires extraordinary storage of Chinese characters, he is likely to waste most of his time making his memory complex, for the reason that the number of most commonly used Chinese characters is no more than two thousand. As a result, if he just has the courage to lessen the effort he spend on making his network of knowledge on Chinese simpler---surely on condition that he has just enough which guarantees no oversimplification---and take some effort to acquire knowledge in another field, say perhaps another language, not only his storage of knowledge would increase but also his competence in job market is likely to be improved along the way. Though complex knowledge system in one specialized area enables a person to become leader in that field more easily and everyone has the potential to do so since each of us in high education has a major and as long as we are devoted we each have the potential to make the bulk of our knowledge bigger and relevant knowledge system more complex, real and sometimes worthy effort lies in simplifying our major that can spare us some time to learn from other fields. After all, in today’s world where efficiency and reduction of costs are constantly highlighted, one who masters two skills is more likely to be outstanding and attractive because he is able to finish a task that originally requires two persons’ efforts. Therefore, effort to simplify knowledge is sometimes needed and worthwhile, for it frees us from unnecessary complex system and provides us chances to gain new knowledge.
In sum, if we can just have courage to simplify our knowledge system according to the real needs and use the additional energy to learn more in other fields, we can be more competent afterwards.

bzr2915UID：2612029

人工置顶一下 加油加油~

dogieUID：2695395

TOPIC: ISSUE25 - "Anyone can make things bigger and more complex. What requires real effort and courage is to move in the opposite direction-in other words, to make things as simple as possible."

I agree that people can make things bigger and more complex, which indicates an increase in knowledge. However, sometimes, it is making things simpler that requires real effort, because that calls for wisdom and insight which enable us to simplify knowledge in one field---not oversimplified though, after all too simple knowledge amounts to little---and be better equipped all-around.
Admittedly and indisputably, people can and tend to make things more complex, especially in one area. Since we are specialized in higher education, we spend most of the time delving into our major, keeping pace with the latest development in the field and trying to be a real specialist in this field eventually. As a result, we know more, and the knowledge system of this particular field in our mind especially develops, becoming more complicated and enabling us to see great depth in this area.
Nevertheless, complex views in one area may hamper our overall development, which necessitates simplifying things in one area and spending time on others. As a result, we need courage to stop incessant inquiry into one special point and should instead take effort to discover what else is needed, After all, the simple we make things, the more other things we can make, given the same amount of energy and time.
For instance, a student learning a foreign language, say Chinese, spend a large quantity of time on memorizing numerous characters. Unless he wants to be an expert in the Chinese language or wants to read classic Chinese that requires extraordinary storage of Chinese characters, he is likely to waste most of his time making his memory complex, for the reason that the number of most commonly used Chinese characters is no more than two thousand. As a result, if he just has the courage to lessen the effort he spend on making his network of knowledge on Chinese simpler---surely on condition that he has just enough which guarantees no oversimplification---and take some effort to acquire knowledge in another field, say perhaps another language, not only his storage of knowledge would increase but also his competence in job market is likely to be improved along the way. Though complex knowledge system in one specialized area enables a person to become leader in that field more easily and everyone has the potential to do so since each of us in high education has a major and as long as we are devoted we each have the potential to make the bulk of our knowledge bigger and relevant knowledge system more complex, real and sometimes worthy effort lies in simplifying our major that can spare us some time to learn from other fields. After all, in today’s world where efficiency and reduction of costs are constantly highlighted, one who masters two skills is more likely to be outstanding and attractive because he is able to finish a task that originally requires two persons’ efforts. Therefore, effort to simplify knowledge is sometimes needed and worthwhile, for it frees us from unnecessary complex system and provides us chances to gain new knowledge.

In sum, if we can just have courage to simplify our knowledge system according to the real needs and use the additional energy to learn more in other fields, we can be more competent afterwards.

语言方面我没设么可以说的，在这方面很弱。以下是我对这个题目的理解，你不一定要采纳，只是多个思路吧。请注意完全是个人看法！！

你理解的简单化和复杂化是指学习知识的时候，在一个领域学得更深更博，或者是匀出时间学习其他领域的事情。我觉得完全不能理解这个解释。make things simple/complex,我认为可以从几个例子来说明。

比如政府机构，要想使其bigger and more complex很容易，增加部门，增加行政手续，增加冗杂的工作人员就行，而且现实中确实是越来越大，但要精简政府就不容易，要保证原有的职能不受损害，同时减少行政成本，提高效率，需要考虑多方面的问题，比如被裁撤部门的阻挠，以及有的新部门会加大工作量，也会阻挠改革，还有很多利益相关方也需要调整和他们的关系。

再比如科学上，很多科学家发现了不同的元素，对于元素之间的相似性也提出了不同的看法，但是门捷列夫却发现了了这其中的规律，用一张周期表把所有的元素归纳在了一起。
再比如，在网络上寻找出有用的信息比在网络上发布信息使其更复杂要难得多。对老师而言，用精简的话语讲述一个专业知识比用冗杂啰嗦的陈述要更困难。写历史的人要发现事实很容易，但是要从大量的历史事实中发现规律就不容易。

就是说简化一个东西需要抓住事物的本质和规律，这是比较难的，儿识时务复杂化和bigger，甚至只需要简单的重复和累加。希望能有帮助。

dogieUID：2695395

issue48 ：The study of history places too much emphasis on individuals. The most significant events and trends in history were made possible not by the famous few, but by groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten."

The historian seeks to describe not only what has happened and how it happened but also why society undergoes change. Any search of this kind raises a number of fundamental questions: the role of individual, the power of the group and the long-term impact of environmental, economic, technological and social force. The answers vary with different philosophical views of universe and the human role therein. Many historians exalt the role of individual in the historical process, contending that major figures chiefly determined the course of human events. Opponents of this thesis argue the driving factor of history is the daily life of ordinary people. Before giving my opinion, I think it is important to look at the arguments on both sides.

Many historians explain history by the impact of the famous few. A famous one Thomas Carlyle said that “The history of the world is but the biography of great men,” reflecting the view that heroes shape history through their personal charisma, intelligence and wisdom. Admittedly, in some cases, the study of history focuses on some highly influential individuals because they indeed have played important roles and what they did have far-reaching influences. In the field of politics, the Lincolns, Napoleons and Gandhis of the world made great contributions to the history, by making crucial decisions and giving wise guidance to the group of people. Then turn to the scientific and artistic fields, breakthroughs often made by individuals rather than groups of people. Take Gregor Mendel for instance, he cultivated and tested at least 28,000 pea plants during seven years, carefully analyzing seven pairs of seed and plant characteristics. And his experimental work became the basis of modern hereditary theory. Obviously, due to his high intelligence and steadfast determination, he made the significant event in history.

However, this heroic view of history, as a singular explanation for why things happen, fell out of favor after World War II. Many historians thought that attributing historical events to the decisions of individuals was a hopeless primitive, childish and unscientific position. And they believed that heroes and their actions were purely products of historical conditions. As far as I am concerned, this view is mechanical, fatalist and reductionist, though it contains elements of truth. There is a large body of evidence that individuals can influence the fate of society, yet they do so in conditions created by the masses. Lincoln, for example, that every one of us heard from our first days in school---a selfless leader, the president who saved the union, the man who freed the slaves, could not have freed a single slave without the 2.5milion solders who served in the Union Army, or without the self-activity of slaves, struggling for their freedom. In the beginning, Lincoln did not believe that his first priority was abolishing slavery, but the anti-slavery movement grew large enough that Lincoln had to do so. That’s how we got the Emancipation Proclamation and the 13th, 14th and 15th Amendments. It is thus clear that an individual can affect the outcome of history only when the historical conditions permit it to be. Thus, the study of history should place more emphasis on the nameless groups. While this is not indicate that historians have to take note down of all their names, because the purpose of historical inquiry is not simply to narrative events but to find patterns and establish meaning. All they have to do is examine history from the perspective of common people as well as the famous few.

To sum up, both the individuals and the masses play important roles in the process of history. When studying history, we should pay attention to the masses as well as the influential few.

BackerShuUID：2658043

issue48 ：The study of history places too much emphasis on individuals. The most significant events and trends in history were made possible not by the famous few, but by groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten."


The historian seeks to describe not only what has happened and how it happened but also why society undergoes（undergoed） change. Any search of this kind raises a number of fundamental questions: the role of individual, the power of the group and the long-term impact of environmental, economic, technological and social force. The answers vary with different philosophical views of universe and the human role therein(问题不错，但是感觉与文章不太相关，看下面~~ 看完后还是觉得这两句话尤其是第二句有些远). Many historians exalt the role of individual in the historical process, contending that major figures chiefly determined the course of human events. Opponents of this thesis argue the driving factor of history is the daily life of ordinary people. Before giving my opinion, I think it is important to look at the arguments on both sides. （先不提自己的观点，从全文作者的论证来看也可以接受。
到底应不应该直接在此处说明自己的观点？不敢肯定哪种方法好。）

Many historians explain history by the impact of the famous few. A famous one Thomas Carlyle said that “The history of the world is but the biography of great men,” reflecting the view that heroes shape history through their personal charisma, intelligence and wisdom. Admittedly, in some cases, the study of history focuses on some highly influential individuals because they indeed have played important roles and what they did have far-reaching influences（作者的观点~~以下论证）. In the field of politics, the Lincolns, Napoleons and Gandhis of the world made great contributions to the history, by making crucial decisions and giving wise guidance to the group of people. Then turn to the scientific and artistic fields, breakthroughs often made by individuals rather than groups of people. Take Gregor Mendel for instance, he cultivated and tested at least 28,000 pea plants during seven years, carefully analyzing seven pairs of seed and plant characteristics. And his experimental work became the basis of modern hereditary theory. Obviously, due to his high intelligence and steadfast determination, he made the significant event in history.

However, this heroic view of history, as a singular explanation for why things happen, fell out of favor after World War II. Many historians thought that attributing historical events to the decisions of individuals was a hopeless primitive, childish and unscientific position. And they believed that heroes and their actions were purely products of historical conditions. As far as I am concerned, this view is mechanical, fatalist and reductionist, though it contains elements of truth（自己的观点~~以下论证）. There is a large body of evidence that individuals can influence the fate of society, yet they do so in conditions created by the masses. Lincoln, for example, that every one of us heard from our first days in school---a selfless leader, the president who saved the union, the man who freed the slaves, could not have freed a single slave without the 2.5milion solders who served in the Union Army, or without the self-activity of slaves, struggling for their freedom. In the beginning, Lincoln did not believe that his first priority was abolishing slavery, but the anti-slavery movement grew large enough that Lincoln had to do so. That’s how we got the Emancipation Proclamation and the 13th, 14th and 15th Amendments. It is thus clear that an individual can affect the outcome of history only when the historical conditions permit it to be. Thus, the study of history should place more emphasis on the nameless groups. While this is not indicate that historians have to take note down of all their names, because the purpose of historical inquiry is not simply to narrative events but to find patterns and establish meaning. All they have to do is examine history from the perspective of common people as well as the famous few.

To sum up, both the individuals and the masses play important roles in the process of history. When studying history, we should pay attention to the masses as well as the influential few.

总体感觉，文章思路清晰，语言较好。
开头的讲fundamental questions的那两句感觉有些不够简练，或者至少把第二句去掉~~
作者body部分两段的结构是： historian 的看法+自己的看法+论证， 很清晰~~

个人意见~~
-----BackerShu