草根修改铺(楼主不在）

meredithpc0426UID：2754868

177楼批改后发的哈 谢谢~！
"Future" has been one of the hottest and thought-provoking topics everywhere since the late of the 20th century. From Davos world economical forum to classrooms in prestigious schools and colleges; from the most elite magazines to our daily newspapers; from formal government work-papers to schedules or yearly reports given by CEOs in leading companies, question never fail to draw attention whenever it has relevance to the "future" issue. We now are too familiar with such issues as global warming, cultural recession, and problems caused by globalization and mass-destructive weapons.

Yet when experts, policy makers and those who give "future" the most priority try to make everyone of us understand the importance of our responsibility, either to future generation or to other living creatures on earth, which in their words, may be a question of "live or die", and while they ambitiously describe the picture of a promising "future", and access to it, pictured in their minds repetitively, is there anyone who give a damn thing on those who are on the blink of starvation and disease, who spend 24-hours of their day to worry about whether wars and riots happened in their country will take their lives away, who can not afford to buy their children a book, who lives in desperate...

I am not a pessimist who believe in the doom day of earth, and I admit that it is out of condemn to consider the consequence of what we do today and its serious impact on future, but the thing is, while we are keen to all these predication and prevention things, should we at least pay as much as attention to those imminent and sometimes cruel reality at this moment? It's time for us to get out of our arrogance cultivated over past decades due to the amazingly increasing speed in almost all aspects of our lives. Narcissism can only get us trapped in the virtual bubbles created by ourselves. To abandon our presence while having only future in mind is one kind of narcissism developed from self-flege?? about the good things while purposely ignore the bad, or worse than that, to falsify them in order to gain contentment.

This pathology can be easily hurt and healed by just asking the simple question: where are our future lies in? History teaches us that no one, neither Peter the Great nor Stalin, can go by shortcuts to the ideal world they hope to build and rule, without solving the existing problems. It is because only under a peaceful and harmony environment can we construct future, we can not build a Babylonian garden hang in the air.
Recently broke-up scandals of Akio Toyoda, president of Toyota, who is on his way to lead the motor industry to a new road of mass productivity and high efficiency, relying on replacing general components with ones made in Japan factories, is a case in the point. Without figuring out how to solve the contradiction between high quality and high productivity, I bet not only he can not continue his initiative trying, but lose the basement where he stands.

Idealists who too concerned about the future may insist on that it is our responsibility to leave our off-springs an untainted landscape where trees and flowers are bloomed under the blue sky. It is undeniable that we sacrificed a lot, more than we should to the development of our economy and living standard. But that does not legitimize a sudden "halt" on all those industries millions of people living their life on.
It calls up the meeting at Copenhagen, where some developed countries ask for a same-level restraint of carbondioxide emission of developing countries, contending that they are the main sources of pollution. However, countries like China and India have every reason to refuse such an unreasonable suggestion. Increasing in GPD in recent years means so little when it comes to division of social possessions and there still exists big deficiencies in economical mode and organizations, as well as laws and constitutions, which need a huge amount of money and technique support. Thus it is wise, even brave for government to focus on solving issues including improving social warfare and investing in education.
There is hardly a constant answer suitable for all situations, and it is certainly not an easy multiple choice in our math exam. To always have future in mind, yet try not accomplish it at the huge expense of contemporaries may be the best way to cope with this complex contradiction.

meredithpc0426UID：2754868

没基时间，对了 题目是“应该解决现在问题还是将来问题” 有几个类似的题， 我就没管具体是哪个了~~

星华月影UID：2632876

"Future" has been one of the hottest and thought-provoking topics everywhere since the late of the 20th century. From Davos world economical forum to classrooms in prestigious schools and colleges; from the most elite magazines to our daily newspapers; from formal government work-papers to schedules or yearly reports given by CEOs in leading companies, question never fail to draw attention whenever it has relevance to the "future" issue. We now are too familiar with such issues as global warming, cultural recession, and problems caused by globalization and mass-destructive weapons.（强烈建议作者在第一段把自己的观点提出来）
Yet when experts, policy makers and those who give "future" the most priority try to make everyone of us understand the importance of our responsibility, either to future generation or to other living creatures on earth, which in their words, may be a question of "live or die", and while they ambitiously describe the picture of a promising "future", and access to it, pictured in their minds repetitively, is there anyone who give a damn thing on those who are on the blink of starvation and disease, who spend 24-hours of their day to worry about whether wars and riots happened in their country will take their lives away, who can not afford to buy their children a book, who lives in desperate...(这一段就一个句子啊，太长了好难理解呀~~ 还有这段的TS 是什么呢)
I am not a pessimist who believe in the doom day of earth, and I admit that it is out of condemn to consider the consequence of what we do today and its serious impact on future, but the thing is, while we are keen to all these predication and prevention things, should we at least pay as much as attention to those imminent and sometimes cruel reality at this moment? It's time for us to get out of our arrogance cultivated over past decades due to the amazingly increasing speed in almost all aspects of our lives. Narcissism can only get us trapped in the virtual bubbles created by ourselves. To abandon our presence while having only future in mind is one kind of narcissism developed from self-flege?? about the good things while purposely ignore the bad, or worse than that, to falsify them in order to gain contentment.

This pathology can be easily hurt and healed by just asking the simple question: where are our future lies in? History teaches us that no one, neither Peter the Great nor Stalin, can go by shortcuts to the ideal world they hope to build and rule, without solving the existing problems. It is because only under a peaceful and harmony environment can we construct future, we can not build a Babylonian garden hang in the air.

Recently broke-up scandals of Akio Toyoda, president of Toyota, who is on his way to lead the motor industry to a new road of mass productivity and high efficiency, relying on replacing general components with ones made in Japan factories, is a case in the point. Without figuring out how to solve the contradiction between high quality and high productivity, I bet not only he can not continue his initiative trying, but lose the basement where he stands.

Idealists who too concerned about the future may insist on that it is our responsibility to leave our off-springs an untainted landscape where trees and flowers are bloomed under the blue sky. It is undeniable that we sacrificed a lot, more than we should to the development of our economy and living standard. But that does not legitimize a sudden "halt" on all those industries millions of people living their life on.

It calls up the meeting at Copenhagen, where some developed countries ask for a same-level restraint of carbondioxide emission of developing countries, contending that they are the main sources of pollution. However, countries like China and India have every reason to refuse such an unreasonable suggestion. Increasing in GPD in recent years means so little when it comes to division of social possessions and there still exists big deficiencies in economical mode and organizations, as well as laws and constitutions, which need a huge amount of money and technique support. Thus it is wise, even brave for government to focus on solving issues including improving social warfare and investing in education.

There is hardly a constant answer suitable for all situations, and it is certainly not an easy multiple choice in our math exam. To always have future in mind, yet try not accomplish it at the huge expense of contemporaries may be the best way to cope with this complex contradiction.

总的来说，作者的文笔比错，但是我觉得这篇文章的思想不够明确，结构不够清晰。作者要知道，老美用在看一篇文章的时间只有几分钟，他们最开始看的就是你的开头段，那么他们自然想要从这里知道你的观点是什么。 还有希望作者在分段上注意一下，一个断里面最好就是包含了观点与例子，而且每一段的开头最后体现出这段的论点。 最后强烈建议作者不要写太长的句子，太难理解了。

星华月影UID：2632876

我自己的
TOPIC: ISSUE119 - "When research priorities are being set for science, education, or any other area, the most important question to consider is: How many people's lives will be improved if the results are successful?"
WORDS: 429                 DATE: 2010/3/15 14:19:24

The author asserts that the most important question to consider is the number of people who will be improved when research priorities are being set for different areas. I concede that the affecting range of the result is a significant element. At the same time, however, there are some other equally important facets should not be ignore. I will discuss each of them as following.

As old saying goes, " first things first". In other words, the important thing should be done firstly. But what is the first thing? How to determine whether is a thing important? In my point of view, an important thing should possess two characters as discussed below.

The first character is wide affecting range. In retrospect, none of significant improvement in human history does not fit this. For example, the first industrial revolutions not only immensely enhanced the volume of production of the world but also completely changed the structure of society. To be exact, on the facet of technology, it caused machines to replace laborers; on the facet of social relationships, it caused the rising of the capitalist class. This example illustrates the point that the significant events must affect a wide range of people, thus we have to acknowledge that if the result of a research can improve many people's life we indeed should set a high priority for it.

Another character is high urgency. For supporting example one should look no further than plagues during past years. In 2003 and 2009 the whole world experienced an outbreak of SARS and H1N1 virus respectively which brought great panics to the world and direly threatened the survival of human species.  In this circumstance, people are eager to the protection for health. Consequently, the governments of every nation actively adopted any feasible measures to cure patients infected by virus and prevent the broader infection, during which millions of dollars is invested into the research of vaccine against the virus. From this example we can clearly realize that the pressing problems are surely important which deserve high priorities.

Last but not least, aside from the two preceding facets as analyzed, in evaluating the priority of a research, one should take into consideration whether it is achievable, because it is wasteful and futile for people to allocate the finite resources on unreachable goals. For instance, so far it is impossible for any science organization to find a way in which people could be immortal. Under this phenomenon, spending the major part of energy on this kind of research is of little use. To the contrary, some predictably achievable issues, such as the cure of cancers and AIDS, should be put on agenda. Accordingly, it can be seen that the feasibility of a research should not be ignored.   

To sum up, in accordance of the analysis above, we should spend the major time and energy to solve the problems from which a large amount of people are suffering and improve the situation from which a large quantity of people will benefit. Nevertheless, the pressing problems are also important and required to be solved firstly. In addition, we should work on easy problems firstly.

佐罗123UID：2776369

TOPIC: ISSUE119 - "When research priorities are being set for science, education, or any other area, the most important question to consider is: How many people's lives will be improved if the results are successful?"
WORDS: 429                 DATE: 2010/3/15 14:19:24

The author asserts that the most important question to consider is the number of people【‘s lives】 who will be improved when research priorities are being set for different areas. I concede that the affecting range of the result is a significant element. At the same time, however, there are some other equally important facets should not be ignore. I will discuss each of them as following.

As old saying goes, " first things first". In other words, the important thing should be done firstly. But what is the first thing? How to determine whether is a thing important? In my point of view, an important thing should possess two characters as discussed below.

The first character is wide affecting range. In retrospect, none of significant improvement in human history does not fit this. For example, the first industrial revolutions not only immensely enhanced the volume of production of the world but also completely changed the structure of society. To be exact, on the facet of technology, it caused machines to replace laborers; on the facet of social relationships, it caused the rising of the capitalist class. This example illustrates the point that the significant events must【must的话我觉得前面再举些例子应该会更加有说服力】 affect a wide range of people, thus we have to acknowledge that if the result of a research can improve many people's life we indeed should set a high priority for it.

Another character is high urgency. For supporting example one should look no further than plagues during past years. In 2003 and 2009 the whole world experienced an outbreak of SARS and H1N1 virus respectively which brought great panics to the world and direly threatened the survival of human species.  In this circumstance, people are eager to 【for】the protection for health. Consequently, the governments of every nation actively adopted any feasible measures to cure patients infected by virus and prevent the broader infection, during which millions of dollars is invested into the research of vaccine against the virus. From this example we can clearly realize that the pressing problems are surely important which deserve high priorities.

Last but not least, aside from the two preceding facets as analyzed, in evaluating the priority of a research, one should take into consideration whether it is achievable, because it is wasteful and futile for people to allocate the finite resources on unreachable goals. For instance, so far it is impossible for any science organization to find a way in which people could be immortal. Under this phenomenon, spending the major part of energy on this kind of research is of little use. To the contrary, some predictably achievable issues, such as the cure of cancers and AIDS, should be put on agenda. Accordingly, it can be seen that the feasibility of a research should not be ignored.   

To sum up, in accordance of the analysis above, we should spend the major time and energy to solve the problems from which a large amount of people are suffering and improve the situation from which a large quantity of people will benefit. Nevertheless, the pressing problems are also important and required to be solved firstly. In addition, we should work on easy problems firstly.【why？论述？到底什么先？】

大问题没有  至少是对我个人来说  有些语句不是很通顺，可以再改改 另外末端不要加入新的论点

佐罗123UID：2776369

TOPIC: ISSUE131 - "The arts (painting, music, literature, etc.) reveal the otherwise hidden ideas and impulses of a society."


The author claims that art creatures reflect the hidden ideas and impulses of a society and I find it to be specious. I concede that many arts would indicate the ideas and impulses of a society, while appealing to some other extents they do not.

Consider first the arts could reflect the hidden social ideas and impulses for they may be the results of artists who concern much about the society of their times. By having a glance into those marvelous masterpieces we can have lot more evidences. The Stowe's Uncle Tom's Cabin shows the will of black people's freedom. Since it was published, people had therefore a chance to have close scrutiny of the real poor status of black people's life. Shortly after the Civil War broke out, Abraham Lincoln, the president of that time once said, as I paraphrase, Stowe's great piece of work trigger the liberty war for black people. So in my observation arts could reveal the ideas of a society.

Also if we take the art of architecture into consideration, we can have ample evidences. For example the China Forbidden City in Beijing, it is the essence of Chinese architecture style. There are nearly 10 thousands rooms within the Forbidden City for the emperor believed that he was the son of the deity and hence he should have the same scale of houses to live. With respect he should less than 10 thousands rooms. And it is the reflection of the ancient Chinese society's belief of obeying the nature instead of breaking the harmonious between human and the nature. The great pyramids in Egypt in which every tunnel were build towards the sky, showed the people's superstition in Gods and respects for deity. The construction in Paris is banned to build higher than the Eiffel Tower and should be fitted perfectly with the environment nearby, showed the harmonious value rooted inside the Paris people.

However some of the arts are simply the work of painting or music without any hidden ideas and impulses of the society. Consider the famous Chinese painter Xu Beihong's noticed piece of work "the Eight Horses". You can hardly tell any reflection of the social ideas and values. The painting is just a beautiful craft that the painter painted the work with his outstanding technique and his precise observation on horses. Also there is another remarkable modern example, Picasso. His art of abstract may be the release of hidden impulses within the artist himself rather than the social ideas as the author claims.

In sum, we can conclude that all of the arts reveal the hidden ideas and impulses of a society so hastily. In my observation I concede that most arts could indicate the hidden social value, while the opposite situations do exist.

佐罗123UID：2776369

没人来……

bzr2915UID：2612029

改佐罗123~下面童鞋直接贴自己习作，继续接力~

TOPIC: ISSUE131 - "The arts (painting, music, literature, etc.) reveal the otherwise hidden ideas and impulses of a society."

再审一下题这里说的是艺术反应了社会隐含的XX，并没有说所有艺术都放映了XX, 你的重点应该落在到底艺术反没反应XX，而不是是不是所有的艺术都反映了XX，额。。有点绕~


The author claims that art creatures reflect the hidden ideas and impulses of a society and I find it to be specious. I concede that many arts would indicate the ideas and impulses of a society, while appealing to some other extents(这里的内涵是什么？） they do not.

Consider first the arts could reflect the hidden social ideas and impulses for they may be the results of artists who concern much about the society of their times. By having a glance into those marvelous masterpieces we can have lot more evidences. The Stowe's Uncle Tom's Cabin shows the will of black people's freedom. Since it was published, people had therefore a chance to have close scrutiny of the real poor status of black people's life. Shortly after the Civil War broke out, Abraham Lincoln, the president of that time once said, as I paraphrase, Stowe's great piece of work trigger the liberty war for black people. So in my observation arts could reveal the ideas of a society.

Also if we take the art of architecture into consideration, we can have ample evidences. For example the China Forbidden City in Beijing, it is the essence of Chinese architecture style. There are nearly 10 thousands rooms within the Forbidden City for the emperor believed that he was the son of the deity and hence he should have the same scale of houses to live. With respect he should less than 10 thousands rooms. And it is the reflection of the ancient Chinese society's belief of obeying the nature instead of breaking the harmonious between human and the nature. The great pyramids in Egypt in which every tunnel were build towards the sky, showed the people's superstition in Gods and respects for deity. The construction in Paris is banned to build higher than the Eiffel Tower and should be fitted perfectly with the environment nearby, showed the harmonious value rooted inside the Paris people.

这两段还比较到位，个人感觉你的逻辑推理即理论部分不足，都是一句观点，一个或几个例子堆起来的~ 这样不好，1、体现不出你的逻辑体系，说服力较弱 2、文章没有层次感，其实一段里也可以分几层写的 3、真的到了考场万一没有合适的例子怎么办？   关于论证方法：下定义 演绎推理 反证 等等 可以学习一下~

However some of the arts are simply the work of painting or music without any hidden ideas and impulses of the society. Consider the famous Chinese painter Xu Beihong's noticed piece of work "the Eight Horses". You can hardly tell any reflection of the social ideas and values. The painting is just a beautiful craft that the painter painted the work with his outstanding technique and his precise observation on horses. Also there is another remarkable modern example, Picasso. His art of abstract may be the release of hidden impulses within the artist himself rather than the social ideas as the author claims.

这一段论述的不好，没能挺起艺术反应不了社会隐含潮流这一论点，充其量只能论一下并非所有艺术品都反映了社会隐含IDEA

In sum, we can conclude that all of the arts reveal the hidden ideas and impulses of a society so hastily. In my observation I concede that most arts could indicate the hidden social value, while the opposite situations do exist.(尾杀的不好没表达出来你的意思）

meredithpc0426UID：2754868

issue ： Tradition and modernization is imcompatible. One must choose bewteen them.
Once in a while, I miss the time when cities were not so crowd as it is now, and neighbors are as close as family members; I miss the time when the spring festival are not just about a big feast cost thousands of yuan in a restaurant, but relatives sitting by a big table and talk to the next dawn; I also miss the time when a letter sent by friends far away can keep me happy for a week, when we need not to keep checking e-mail and messages and download some detailed information to keep us alive all the time.

If you have any hopes like that, while at the same time can not seem to give up all the convenience modernization has offered to us, may be you are trapped in the byzantine maze of modernization, which inevitably and unconsciously, changed the way we eat, wear, live and even our minds. Thus, tradition has to retreat, until one day we recognize that we can hardly find it. It is no denying that a competition exists between the old and the new, and we can not avoid making choices, sometimes.

I think, in this competition, if I may call it. Modernization is no evil side, as some tradition-favoring person may contend. Some ill-conceived tradition, such as rotten system, unhealthy habits, stands in our way of modernization, of making our living a better world. Just imagine how it would be like if our predecessors not give up the traditional sovereign system, under which civilians owe all of their rights to the noble, upper-class or churches. People did not have the least bit freedom to struggle for their lives. Born into a influential family, then you can attain everything, fortune, social status and respect from the inferior without efforts; born into a poor one, the only thing that you can choose for yourself is the date of your death. This is the cruel and pathetic truth, reflected by dozens of novels. And the tragic root is the traditional social systems, and ideas. People then believed in ranking of human beings and that Christians are servants of the pope and bishops, which seriously constraint our minds, and block the development of science in many field.

Yet people today are likely to be the opposite, lost in Narcissism created by numerous achievements as a result of modernization. That makes us forget how valuable some traditional ideals, values are to us. Diversity of culture, equality and respect for those made a great contribution to our culture progress and inspired our thoughts... I still remember the day when president of France, Chirac, escort the body of Alexandre Dumas into le Pantheon, where there are only 11 politicians out of hundreds of scientists, writers and artists. People of France would never drop this ceremony, even in warfare or hard times, it was preserved well and this tradition continues to remind them of practicing enlightenment thoughts expressed by Voltaire, the greatest philosophy in the world.  I bet no reasons, even at the price of costing tax payers amounts of money for nothing gain, would stop French from fighting for its preservation. The same goes with Americans willingness to risking everything, even challenge the constitution and unfair laws to guarantee the rights of every citizen, regardless of their color, race, and social status. At those critical times, things like productivity, economical development, which ensures smooth progress of modernization, are set aside, or accused of. That we should always remember those traditional values are the foundation of one country and can not be compromised, not in a country whose power is at hand of their people.

Though it seems like in all situations above, we choose either of them while abandoning another. There are some truly complex ones, and no black-or-white can be told. If we are forced to make decisions too rush, irrevocable mistakes will be made. Sometimes, it is hard to value the traditional relics, whether they are common historical site, or a dangerous language or believing. The best way may be to choose none. And do whatever we could, relying on high-tech or human intelligence, to soften, even eliminate those gaps and friction between tradition and modernization eventually. The city of Greek gave a shot on this and set a good example for those cities which want to enjoy the expediency of modern life, while preserving its history. Incompetent city sanitations and shabby houses need improving, yet new ones can be built without smashing the old. This coexist is not only hardly strange and eerier, but also full of humanity and vitality. After all, the only thing we need to protect is not the outlook, but things that can remind us of those past traditions, engrossed in relics and traditional language.

Who says that we can not embrace modernization while having traditional values in mind? In many KFC in china, we can see people drinking traditional Chinese soups and having chickens with chopsticks. And that is just one reflect in everyday experience that how wonderfully these two can coexist and create a better life.

suchana03UID：2764281

改楼上
Once in a while, I miss the time when cities were not so crowd as it is now, and neighbors are as close as family members; I miss the time when the spring festival are not just about a big feast cost thousands of yuan in a restaurant, but relatives sitting by a big table and talk to the next dawn; I also miss the time when a letter sent by friends far away can keep me happy for a week, when we need not to keep checking e-mail and messages and download some detailed information to keep us alive all the time.开头是典型的中文写作开头，也算新颖吧，但没明确观点老外看不懂

If you have any hopes like that, while at the same time can not seem to give up all the convenience modernization has offered to us, may be you are trapped in the byzantine maze of modernization, which inevitably and unconsciously, changed the way we eat, wear, live and even our minds. Thus, tradition has to retreat, until one day we recognize that we can hardly find it. It is no denying that a competition exists between the old and the new, and we can not avoid making choices, sometimes.这一段的观点？

I think, in this competition, if I may call it. Modernization is no evil side, as some tradition-favoring person may contend. Some ill-conceived tradition, such as rotten system, unhealthy habits, stands in our way of modernization, of making our living a better world. Just imagine how it would be like if our predecessors not give up the traditional sovereign system, under which civilians owe all of their rights to the noble, upper-class or churches. People did not have the least bit freedom to struggle for their lives. Born into a influential family, then you can attain everything, fortune, social status and respect from the inferior without efforts; born into a poor one, the only thing that you can choose for yourself is the date of your death. This is the cruel and pathetic truth, reflected by dozens of novels. And the tragic root is the traditional social systems, and ideas. People then believed in ranking of human beings and that Christians are servants of the pope and bishops, which seriously constraint our minds, and block the development of science in many field.

Yet people today are likely to be the opposite, lost in Narcissism created by numerous achievements as a result of modernization. That makes us forget how valuable some traditional ideals, values are to us. Diversity of culture, equality and respect for those made a great contribution to our culture progress and inspired our thoughts... I still remember the day when president of France, Chirac, escort the body of Alexandre Dumas into le Pantheon, where there are only 11 politicians out of hundreds of scientists, writers and artists. People of France would never drop this ceremony, even in warfare or hard times, it was preserved well and this tradition continues to remind them of practicing enlightenment thoughts expressed by Voltaire, the greatest philosophy in the world.  I bet no reasons, even at the price of costing tax payers amounts of money for nothing gain, would stop French from fighting for its preservation. The same goes with Americans willingness to risking everything, even challenge the constitution and unfair laws to guarantee the rights of every citizen, regardless of their color, race, and social status. At those critical times, things like productivity, economical development, which ensures smooth progress of modernization, are set aside, or accused of. That we should always remember those traditional values are the foundation of one country and can not be compromised, not in a country whose power is at hand of their people.

Though it seems like in all situations above, we choose either of them while abandoning another. There are some truly complex ones, and no black-or-white can be told. If we are forced to make decisions too rush, irrevocable mistakes will be made. Sometimes, it is hard to value the traditional relics, whether they are common historical site, or a dangerous language or believing. The best way may be to choose none. And do whatever we could, relying on high-tech or human intelligence, to soften, even eliminate those gaps and friction between tradition and modernization eventually. The city of Greek gave a shot on this and set a good example for those cities which want to enjoy the expediency of modern life, while preserving its history. Incompetent city sanitations and shabby houses need improving, yet new ones can be built without smashing the old. This coexist is not only hardly strange and eerier, but also full of humanity and vitality. After all, the only thing we need to protect is not the outlook, but things that can remind us of those past traditions, engrossed in relics and traditional language.

Who says that we can not embrace modernization while having traditional values in mind? In many KFC in china, we can see people drinking traditional Chinese soups and having chickens with chopsticks. And that is just one reflect in everyday experience that how wonderfully these two can coexist and create a better life.
作者似乎中文的散文写得较好，但是，aw是大有学术性的，而不是个人抒发感情的，而且，作者应更了解英文思维和写作顺序，属于观点+例子+论证，而不是中文循序渐进似的。否则，如果不按英文的思维来，老万很难看懂这种含蓄的表达。本人参加各类英语演讲比赛有此感触，有的时候你的文章写得再好，第一段不表态，每一段不说明，是看不懂的。

suchana03UID：2764281

TOPIC: ISSUE177 - "The study of an academic discipline alters the way we perceive the world. After studying the discipline, we see the same world as before, but with different eyes."

    I agree that the study of an academic discipline, whether humanities or sciences, changes how we perceive the world and enables us to view the same world with different eyes. After all, each discipline has its own focus, showing us different aspects of the same world, as discussed below.
    To start with, humanities changes the way we see the world, especially in the case of literature. Given the world in front us, we no longer see social issues as they are, but learn to reflect upon them with our thinking. We begin to think about ideas and impulses, rather than believing in apparent images blindly. And finally, based on our characters and understanding, we construct our own worldview.
    For instance, Romanticism advocates imagination, love of nature and hope for life; Realism unfolds harsh life of people from lower social strata, dismisses dreams we cherish, and forces us to accept the world as it is. Thus, people delving into these different literature movements are exposed to various trends of thoughts. They can choose whatever way they like to percive the world. Given the same event of the rising of bourgeois, an optimistist might hope capitalism brings up social prosperity for all, and that the harsh suffering of the working-class would eventually end due to capitalist self-improvement. A pessimist may adopt a more practical attitude. Having realized the ruthless nature of capitalist exploitaion, he doubts those dreams once cherished and lies told by exploiters. In both cases, people build up their own understanding towards the world, based on the study of the discipline as well as they individual characters. If they once had little personal differences in viewing the world, then they begin to vary in their viewpoints towards the the same issue.
    In addition, science also alters the way we see the world. It eliminates superstition in mind and injects scientific understanding. People learning science begin to see the world in an objective way rather than mixed with personal emotions. They learn to explain, rather than to fear.
    For instance, a person learning physics sees nature as an understandable entity rather than one controlled by a mysterious God. Once he learns the formation of electricity current, he no longer fears the punishment from God on rainy days, but explains the phenomenon from a scientific angle. And a chemist has no fear when he is walking through tomb and sees mysterious lights. Instead, he is rather familiar with the phenomenon since he is well aware reactions between different chemical elements. Similarly, a biologist would dismiss any church's propoganda of human creation from God, but learn to think independently from an evolutionary point of view. Therefore, science expels fears in human heart, and makes the world in front of us a more rational and sensible one.
    In sum, whether humanities or sciences, each discipline with its distinctive focues helps build up our own viewpoints towards the world. It changes a person and alters the mind.

mianyixueUID：2556529

这个我来拍！！

TOPIC: ISSUE177 - "The study of an academic discipline alters the way we perceive the world. After studying the discipline, we see the same world as before, but with different eyes."

    I agree that the study of an academic discipline, whether humanities or sciences（这个定语从句没有谓语呀，这里也不应该省略）, changes how we perceive the world and enables us to view the same world with different eyes. After all, each discipline has its own focus, showing us different aspects of the same world, as discussed below.
    To start with, humanities changes the way we see the world, especially in the case of literature. Given the world in front us, we no longer see social issues as they are, but learn to reflect upon them with our thinking. We begin to think about ideas and impulses, rather than believing（rather than believe） in apparent images blindly. And finally, based on our characters and understanding, we construct our own worldview.
这段学的真是太好了， 分析通过人文学科如何形成世界观，学习。
    For instance, Romanticism advocates imagination, love of nature and hope for life; Realism unfolds harsh life of people from lower social strata, dismisses dreams we cherish, and forces us to accept the world as it is. Thus, people delving into these different literature movements are exposed to various trends of thoughts. They can choose whatever way（建议改成any way which） they like to percive the world. Given the same event of the rising of bourgeois, an optimistist might hope capitalism brings up social prosperity for all, and that the harsh suffering of the working-class would eventually end due to capitalist self-improvement. A pessimist may adopt a more practical attitude. Having realized the ruthless nature of capitalist exploitaion, he doubts those dreams once cherished and lies told by exploiters. (通过对比的举例分析人文学科对不同人的世界观的影响)In both cases, people build up their own understanding towards the world, based on the study of the discipline as well as they individual characters. If they once had little personal differences in viewing the world, then they begin to vary in their viewpoints towards the the same issue.
    In addition, science also alters the way we see the world. It eliminates superstition in mind and injects scientific understanding. People learning science begin to see the world in an objective way rather than mixed with personal emotions. They learn to explain, rather than to fear.
    For instance, a person learning physics sees nature as an understandable entity rather than one controlled by a mysterious God. Once he learns the formation of electricity current, he no longer fears the punishment from God on rainy days, but explains the phenomenon from a scientific angle. And a chemist has no fear when he is walking through tomb and sees mysterious lights. Instead, he is rather familiar with the phenomenon since he is well aware （about）reactions between different chemical elements. Similarly, a biologist would dismiss any church's propoganda of human creation from God, but learn to think independently from an evolutionary point of view. Therefore, science expels fears in human heart, and makes the world in front of us a more rational and sensible one.
从不同学科的科学家举例，讨论科学给人类带来的思想变化，写的很有深度呀。
    In sum, whether humanities or sciences, each discipline with its distinctive focues（with its distinctive focues应该删去，不适合修饰主语） helps build up our own viewpoints towards the world. It changes a person and alters the mind.
整体文章写的很有层次，很有深度，个别处应该完善以下，有些词句写的真是太好了，学习了，前辈！！

mianyixueUID：2556529

Students should bring a certain skepticism to whatever they study. They should question what they are taught.
时间有限，写的很仓促！
The speaker contents that students should question what they are taught, rather than accept whatever they study
passively. I concede that overstated skepticism to what we study is harmful to inherit our ancient knowledge and
experience. However, we should realize the importance of skepticism in the whole society. The impetus of our
society's progress is a cycle proceed that we inherit and question our predecessors' experience.
Firstly, skepticism is important in our physical science. Without skepticism, we will be confused for countless
knowledge and millions of opinions to a certain theories from our predecessors. Without skepticism, we will haven't
enough abilities to discriminate right knowledge and the wrong one. It's thousands of histories stories that show
the importance of skepticism that we can't deny. Copernicus, Polish astronomer, had skepticism about was the center
of universe, at last overturned the traditional theory and created the new idea that the sun is the centre of
universe. Since skepticism always continued, Bruno, Italian philosopher, insisted that the sun is only a common
star of the whole universe, which influenced the mission deeply, and promoted astronomy up to a higher level. All
the history stories told us a truth that as far as skepticism exists, the world will develop all the time.

Secondly, skepticism is also playing a vital role in the art. Prior to human creating art, nature had shown its
special art. But human propelled art by an unprecedented speed. And the skepticism is the motive power of progress.
Take the painting art for example. The preliminary stage of the art history is from ancient Greek art which urges
people to think about art. People have such a skepticism about art that people divides art into several kinds of
art, such as impression art, postimpressionism art, neoimpressionism art, anyone of which shows a kind of
explanation about what is art. And all the arts are results of skepticism toward other different art. Film art also
reveals the importance of skepticism. I believe every one knows Bruce Lee who creates a new film genre. In the
early stage of American films actors and actresses act untruly, specially when it comes to fight scenes. However,
Bruce Lee haves a skepticism about the situation and then express his understanding about film through his first
film the Green Hornet which brings us a new impression about film and a new film genre. So in the art field, we
also can't deny the importance of skepticism.

Even in the economy field, we can find its indispensable place. The first financial crisis destroyed the life of
American, and influences the whole world deeply. When people realized to query American economy, the famous
economist Keynes emerged, and told people how to improve the economy. So, we can see that skepticism saved people
trapped in the financial crisis.

In conclusion, we should realize the importance of skepticism and improve the world together with it.

bzr2915UID：2612029

改楼上的，楼下童鞋直接贴习作~

Students should bring a certain skepticism to whatever they study. They should question what they are taught.
时间有限，写的很仓促！
再审审题

The speaker contents that students should question what they are taught, rather than accept whatever they study
passively. I concede that overstated skepticism to what we study is harmful to inherit our ancient knowledge and
experience. However, we should realize the importance of skepticism in the whole society. The impetus of our
society's progress is a cycle proceed that we inherit and question our predecessors' experience.
（开头不错，挺有气势的~）

Firstly, skepticism is important in our physical science.（主题句太泛泛） Without skepticism, we will be confused for countless
knowledge and millions of opinions to a certain theories from our predecessors. Without skepticism, we will haven't
enough abilities to discriminate right knowledge and the wrong one.
（这两个分论点是不错的，但是你没展开论证，下面又来总论点质疑的重要性了，有跳跃）It's thousands of histories stories that show
the importance of skepticism that we can't deny. Copernicus, Polish astronomer, had skepticism about was the center
of universe, at last overturned the traditional theory and created the new idea that the sun is the centre of
universe. Since skepticism always continued, Bruno, Italian philosopher, insisted that the sun is only a common
star of the whole universe, which influenced the mission deeply, and promoted astronomy up to a higher level. All
the history stories told us a truth that as far as skepticism exists, the world will develop all the time.
（结论太过一般，你这两个例子就能涵盖整个历史？）

Secondly, skepticism is also playing a vital role in the art. Prior to human creating art, nature had shown its
special art. But human propelled art by an unprecedented speed. And the skepticism is the motive power of progress.
Take the painting art for example. The preliminary stage of the art history is from ancient Greek art which urges
people to think about art. People have such a skepticism about art that people divides art into several kinds of
art, such as impression art, postimpressionism art, neoimpressionism art, anyone of which shows a kind of
explanation about what is art. And all the arts are results of skepticism toward other different art. Film art also
reveals the importance of skepticism. I believe every one knows Bruce Lee who creates a new film genre. In the
early stage of American films actors and actresses act untruly, specially when it comes to fight scenes. However,
Bruce Lee haves a skepticism about the situation and then express his understanding about film through his first
film the Green Hornet which brings us a new impression about film and a new film genre. So in the art field, we
also can't deny the importance of skepticism.

Even in the economy field, we can find its indispensable place. The first financial crisis destroyed the life of
American, and influences the whole world deeply. When people realized to query American economy, the famous
economist Keynes emerged, and told people how to improve the economy. So, we can see that skepticism saved people
trapped in the financial crisis.

In conclusion, we should realize the importance of skepticism and improve the world together with it.(收尾仓促）

跑题了，至少是偏题，原题说的是学生应不应该质疑他们所学的东西，你在这大论特论质疑的重要性。 质疑确实很重要，难道因为他重要学生就一定要质疑他们所学的知识？或者说不用质疑他们所学的知识？ 在我看来，两者无必然关系。你可以点明了质疑的重要性然后来引入学生在学习过程中遇到的一些质疑，然后展开讨论。 只看了前面部分，因为偏离较大，并没有全改，见谅！

个人意见，批判性接受！

mailantUID：2556159

42.The following appeared in a proposal from the economic minister of the country of Paraterra.
"In order to strengthen its lagging economy, last year the government of the nearby country of Bellegea began an advertising campaign to promote ecologically sound tourism (ecotourism). This year the number of foreign visitors arriving at Bellegea's main airport doubled, and per capita income in Bellegea increased by ten percent. To provide more income for the population of Paraterra and also preserve the natural environment of our tiny country, we too should begin to promote ecotourism. To ensure that our advertising campaign is successful, we should hire the current director of Bellegea's National Tourism Office as a consultant for the campaign."
临近城市Bellegea的政府为促进其落后的经济，去年开展了一项对生态旅游的广告推广。今年到达Bellegea主要机场的外国游客数量翻了一番，人均收入增加了10％。为增加Paraterra居的收入并保护我们有限国土的天然环境，我们也应该推广生态旅游。为保证我们广告策略的成，我们应该雇佣Bellegea现任国家旅游局的主任来担任广告的顾问。

In this analysis, the arguer advocates that the country of Paraterra should start to promote ecotourism, for it will benefit the increasing of income for the population of Paraterra and the preserving of the natural environment. To substantiate the conclusion, the arguer cites the example of nearby country of Bellegea, which through the promoting of ecotourism, the number of foreign visitors arriving at Bellegea's main airport doubled, and the citizens of Bellegea's per capita income increased by ten percent. Meanwhile, the arguer claims that to guarantee the success of Bellegea's advertising campaign, Bellegea should engage the current director of Bellegea's National Tourism Office as a consultant for the campaign. At first, the argument might seemly reasonable, however, a thoroughly examination would reveal how groundless the conclusion is.

First of all, the premise of this conclusion is not established. A significant prerequisite to promote ecotourism is the country have enough ecological resources which could be exploited. However, the whole passage doesn't show what kinds of ecological resources the Paraterra have, whether this country have the potential capacity as its neighboring country of Bellegea to promote ecotourism. If the country of Paraterra lacks enough ecological resources, the whole proposal means nothing. Besides, the proposal of engaging the current director of Bellegea's National Tourism Office as a consultant for the campaign fails to concern that whether the director has the ability to help them, even the director could efficiently promote the ecotourism in Bellegea, who can ensure she/he will success in Paraterra, concerning she/he doesn't familiar with the condition of Bellegea. Without these key premises, it's impossible to conclude any meaningful conclusions.

In addition, even if we acknowledge the establishment of above mentioned preconditions, the author's arguments are insufficient to support the conclusion. The arguer takes the success of Bellegea as an example to prove that promoting the ecotourism in Paraterra also will be succeed, but the problem is that the two situations are maybe not similar enough to justify the analogical deduction. We have not enough statistics to prove that the two countries have the similar climate, geographical features, traffic condition, etc. Any differences will make the success of Bellegea cannot be duplicated in the Paraterra. Moreover, the purpose of the foreign visitors arriving at Bellegea's main airport probably not for touring, maybe for the conference or business, or just transfer, and the increasing of the incoming of citizens of Bellegea maybe due to the development of industry in the Bellegea.

Finally, the arguer commits a fallacy of hasty generalization. The purpose of promoting ectourism is to increase the income of the population of Paraterra and preserve the natural environment. Nonetheless, there is no evidence to show that the citizens of Paraterra gains low paid and the environment has been polluted so severely. Maybe the income of the population of Paraterra is higher and the environment is better than Bellegea's, in that case, the Paraterra is not necessity to learn from Bellegea.

As it stands, the conclusion reached in this argument is invalid and misleading. To strengthen the argument, the arguer would have to provide evidence concerning the detailed situation of Paraterra and Bellegea, such as the climate, geographical features, economic base, etc. With these premises we can ensure the conclusion is well-reasoned and persuasive.