【1010G精英组】ISSUE130 F组回收站

lynnuanaUID: 2772328

4月20日，13点之前上交ISSUE-130，作文直接跟帖，修改直接跟帖，不用另开新帖~
注意每篇issue最好附上简要提纲

【Argument53情况汇报】F组回收站总链接地址
小组成员们都及时提交了作文，但是修改时间需要把握一下，最好在24：00之前改完，便于检查。

130 "How children are socialized today determines the destiny of society. Unfortunately, we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring about a better society."

附 关于ISSUE130的一些分析（lxin提供）
    关于破题的INSPIRING INTERVIEW 推荐！（from追星剑）
    改作文指南 （最後の使徒）

lynnuanaUID: 2772328

The future of society, as the author states, is hinged on whether children are well socialized or not, while he concludes pessimistically that the community has not yet learned the way to raise the offspring who are placed hopes of constructing a better society. Although this statement seems apparently convincing, the author, in fact, only based on his empirical evidence, greatly exaggerates the relative importance of responsibility the children afford and links the relationship between childhood education and society destiny too closely and too subjectively.

No one would deny that children, as an individual unit, would undoubtedly impact the future society, more or less. The better they are socialized today, the greater they would probably contribute to the community when they grow up and vice versa. This is why the adults always quiet worry about the children who fails to be well socialized. This kind of children is highly suspected to become autistic, childish or self-abasement and so forth in their later life. Besides, another concerning is about the result of socializing immersion training. To some extent, it would affect the sustainable social development. If a child lived with criticism and hostility, he would be more likely to learn to condemn and fight and finally become a danger to society. Comparatively, if a child gets positive socialization training, he will, in principle, have a healthy personality and probably brings about a civilized and harmonious community in the future. Thus, childhood socialization training clearly has an important place in the efforts to bring about sustainable development.

While conceding the significant meaning of raising children by emphasizing their socialization, I disagree that it is a decisive factor related to the social development, even destiny of our human society. It seems to me that policy, economy, culture and the individuals are four fundamental constituents as influences the society as a whole. The policy manipulates social regulations and manages people’s activities; the economy supplies material foundation; the culture influences lifestyle, opinion and attitude of the community and the individuals always play a key role in the critical moments such as Abraham Lincoln in the Civil War, General Montgomery In the battle of Normandy. Perhaps most of them have the capability of socialization, but this would not be the most important factor to affect the destiny of our society.

Since individuals’ socialization is one of the significant impact factors for social development, have we already grasped the key to raise our children? Or could we socialize the children perfectly? Unfortunately, the answer is no. it is not because that we are unable to teach children the method to build a better society, as mentioned by the author, but because of many factors we could not handle or predict. The socialization is defined as a process by which human beings learn to adopt the behavior patterns of the community in which they live. Every person would accept this training throughout the lifetime. For instance, girls, since they were born, are taught to learn how to be daughters, sisters, friends, wives, mothers and grandmas, and in society, they should learn how to be feminine students, employees, leaders and other occupational roles. So do boys. In this process,  on one hand, families, schools, mass Medias, work places and other groups are the outside socialization agents which may conduct individuals’ values, attitudes, behaviors and skills acquired in the period. On the other hand, the different generations, classes, religions and races would also help to effect the potential development of a person as well as children. In brief, there is no standard in the world could be offered to judge the degree of children’s socialization. Therefore, emphasizing the necessary connection between childhood education and society construction, as the author did, seems too hasty and narrow.

Education is humanity’s best hope and most effective means in the quest to achieve sustainable social development. I concede that the successful socialization training towards children plays a significant role in the development of our society. But what must be noted is that we should never entrust all hope to the descendent, no matter what reasons we have.


提纲：
同意孩子社会化程度会某种程度上影响社会的未来，
但是社会未来与很多因素有关，孩子社会化并非determine因素
而且，社会化程度根本没有一个统一的标准，未来社会发展也不能被预测，根本不可能完美学会教育孩子社会化的方法，更别提建设better society了

lynnuanaUID: 2772328

在网上瞎搜，竟然搜出来联合国教科文组织UNESCO出版的论述儿童教育与社会发展的论文集
奉献给大家~~~ 刚读了一点，感觉对扩展思维和相关词汇灰常有帮助！！

地址：http://unesdoc.unesco.org/images/0015/001593/159355e.pdf

carol.ljUID: 2764249

lynn,你这么快就写完了。我可能要整一下午。。晚上再交了。

lxin333UID: 2650844

The future of society, as the author states, is hinged on whether children are well socialized or not, while he concludes pessimistically that the community has not yet learned the way to raise the offspring who are placed hopes of constructing a better society. Although this statement seems apparently convincing, the author, in fact, only based on his empirical evidence, greatly exaggerates the relative importance of responsibility the children afford and links the relationship between childhood education and society destiny too closely and too subjectively.

No one would deny that children, as an individual unit, would undoubtedly impact the future society, more or less. The better they are socialized today, the greater they would probably contribute to the community when they grow up and vice versa (求解！反过来说是什么情况？应该不是各取better和greater的反义吧。。。这个v v的用法不是只是调换前后两句的顺序而已么？). This is why the adults always quiet worry about the children who fails to be well socialized. This kind of children is highly suspected to become autistic, childish or self-abasement and so forth in their later life学习！. Besides, another concerning is about the result of socializing immersion training求解。。。. To some extent, it would affect the sustainable social development. If a child lived with criticism and hostility, he would be more likely to learn to condemn（判刑、谴责但是没犯罪的意思吧？还是我理解不对？commit a crime） and fight and finally become a danger to society. Comparatively, if a child gets positive socialization training, he will, in principle, have a healthy personality and probably brings about a civilized and harmonious community in the future.（感觉这里不严谨，你的意思是一个孩子就能bring about。。。 我觉得可以换个说法 make contribution to create a civilized and … ） Thus, childhood socialization training clearly has an important place in the efforts to bring about sustainable development.

While conceding the significant meaning of raising children by emphasizing their socialization, I disagree that it is a decisive factor related to the social development, even destiny of our human society. It seems to me that policy, economy, culture and the individuals are four fundamental constituents as influences the society as a whole. The policy manipulates social regulations and manages people’s activities; the economy supplies material foundation; the culture influences lifestyle, opinion and attitude of the community and the individuals always play a key role in the critical moments such as Abraham Lincoln in the Civil War, General Montgomery In the battle of Normandy.赞赞赞 “个人观点”！学习！ Perhaps most of them have the capability of socialization, but this would not be the most important factor to affect the destiny of our society.

Since individuals’ socialization is one of the significant impact factors for social development, have we already grasped the key to raise our children? Or could we socialize the children perfectly? Unfortunately, the answer is no. it is not because that we are unable to teach children the method to build a better society, as mentioned by the author, but because of many factors we could not handle or predict. The socialization is defined as a process by which human beings learn to adopt the behavior patterns of the community in which they live. Every person would accept this training throughout the lifetime. For instance, girls, since they were born, are taught to learn how to be daughters, sisters, friends, wives, mothers and grandmas, and in society, they should learn how to be feminine students, employees, leaders and other occupational roles. So do boys. In this process,  on one hand, families, schools, mass Medias, work places and other groups are the outside socialization agents妙极 可是inside是啥？理解错了还是我钻牛角尖了 which may conduct individuals’ values, attitudes, behaviors and skills acquired in the period. On the other hand, the different generations, classes, religions and races would also help to effect the potential development of a person as well as children. In brief, there is no standard in the world could be offered to judge the degree of children’s socialization. （这里的结论应该是 确实没perfect的方法社会化小朋友 这样可以呼应前文吧 还照应后文呢）Therefore, emphasizing the necessary connection between childhood education and society construction, as the author did, seems too hasty and narrow. （最最重要的疑问 见下文）

Education is humanity’s best hope and most effective means in the quest to achieve sustainable social development. I concede that the successful socialization training towards children plays a significant role in the development of our society. But what must be noted is that we should never entrust all hope to the descendent, no matter what reasons we have.（不能寄全部希望于后代？好像有点歧义还是表达不清。。。）

从我观点看文章是这样的
1 孩子的社会化在决定社会命运的众多因素中扮演了重要角色
2但是政治经济文化个人因素等也决定了社会命运
3没有完美办法去社会化小朋友
最最重要的疑问
你的提纲中有 更不用提better society 可是没展开说
我会这样补充 何况，如上文所说，社会命运被众多东东决定，会raise children就能有better society 作者你这样把孩子的教育和社会命运联系起来，太hasty太narrow了！

思路很清晰，语言很不错，值得学习~
写政治经济文化的那段很精彩，很有说服力！而且，最重要的是为下一段讲Individual对社会贡献做了准备，很自然的衔接到how to raise children这个问题。真的，过渡得很好诶，要多加学习并适当抄袭。

lxin333UID: 2650844

我只是按我想法该得。。。。

lxin333UID: 2650844

http://anthro.palomar.edu/social/default.htm

1不同意两个观点
2社会化之我见 孩子的社会化对于社会命运很重要
3但是 社会化贯穿人的一生 。。。而且还有别的因素
4第二个观点是错地 我们的教育还是有成效的 BLABLABLA~
5结论！教育对于社会化小朋友很重要，教育亦然~

Is the destiny of society determined by how children are socialized, as the author's assertion? I disagree with the author's over-statement. And the author's pessimistic conclusion that we haven't learnt how to raise children who can help bring about a better society is poorly supported by empirical evidence.

Consider first the speaker's assertion that society's destiny depends on how children are socialized. I concede that children who are well socialized would impact the future society. Basically, socialization is the process of inheriting norms, customs and ideologies. It may provide the individual with the skills and habits necessary for participating within their own society. Therefore, children who are well socialized benefit the society; vice versa, the children without well socialization may become an anti-society. Thus, childhood socialization clearly plays an important and irreplaceable role among all the factors which determine the destiny of society.

However, while conceding the significant meaning of childhood socialization, I disagree that it is a decisive factor related to the destiny of society. Not only because the personal socialization continues throughout one's all life, but it is also acknowledged that scientific technology, economic, policy, culture and individuals are fundamental as influences the society as a whole. Scientific technology provide constitute a primary productive force; policy manipulates social regulations; economy supplies material foundation; culture enrich people's spiritual life and individuals are always the crucial turning points of the development of history. So, how children socialized is just one of the most important factors which are responsible for the destiny of society.

Consider the second claim that we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring about a better society. Admittedly, the society, which is developing by leaps and bounds, is attributed to the giant improvements in science and technology. Einstein, one of the greatest gifted scientists in 20th, put forwarded the theory of relativity, which thoroughly changed the cognition of humans. Additionally, during the Industrial Revolution, James Watt designed the steam engine and leaded society into a new era. Nelson Mandela, who is well educated,  devoted himself into the cause of national liberation as a soldier. Martin Luther King, make no efforts to fight for the equality of all human being irrespective of the color. In a word, we have got significant achievement in the history of humans that is owing to the cultivations for children.

Moreover, if we define a "better" society as one characterized by greater tolerance of viewpoints and different people, greater respect for individual rights, greater cooperation across cultural and national boundaries, then most recent quarter-century our society has paid more attention in many aspects such as become more respectful of the right of women, disables, homosexuals, various ethnical and racial groups, etc. On the whole, the author's hasty and narrow generalization is unsubstantiated.

To summarize, how children are socialized determines the destiny of society to some degree, but we should not ignore other factors as important as the former. Moreover, there's a close association between the childhood socialization and education. Even though we have accomplished a great amount of achievement in various fields, the quality of education still remains to be strengthened.

carol.ljUID: 2764249

        What is the socialization? It refers to the process of learning one’s culture and how to live within it. In addition, for the individual, it provides the resources necessary for acting and participating within their society. Therefore, some important questions in the wake of that: is the destiny of society result form the children’s socialization ?have we not yet learned how to rise children who are significant for bringing about a better society?
        If some people’s answers are yes, this assertion maybe a kind of overstatement while appealed in some aspects. Precisely because there are on necessary relationship among them and poor evidence to bolster the assumption.
        For one thing, consider the relationship between the socialization of children and the destiny of society. Indeed, the socialization of children is very important to their later lives, thus to some extent, so as the future of society. Of course, it seems that children are the backbone of the future world. However, that raise eyebrows me. Socialization is not the only, even not the most important character that play such a central role in the destiny of society. Numerous kinds of major members of socialization stand here, such as all individual members into it’s moral norms, attitudes, values , motives, language and symbols which is the means by which social and cultural continuity. Turn our attention to the person who determine the destiny of society. John F Nash, half of whose life was fighting with schizophrenia, which almost deprive his right to have a formal life in the society,  has gain a tremendous achievement in the economic area, which calls game theory. Can't we assert Nash have no contribute to bring us a better society just because he is not totally socialization?
        For another thing, consider the growth of children, the social from all walks of life are very concerned about the children. For the time being, the quickening pace of life, social pressures, the birth rate reduced, many children which are no brothers or sisters an so forth, such social problems make a big influence on the growth of children. Their parents’growth environment than youth have changed a lot in some respects, such as education resources, access to information, living conditions, etc., Obviously, the children are better than their parents now. However, the parents demand children in the way they used to obey. Furthermore, the environment that children has no playmates leads to be lack of team cooperation ability, cognitive ability of society and leadership skills. This is bad indeed for their growth.
         In sum, children's socialization, to some degree, affects the destiny of society, but it doesn't determine it alone. And fortunately we are raising children who can gradually ameliorate our society and bring about a bright and promising future. And it’s a wise choice to raise children by giving up the stale way.



      

提纲：
1.由于问题有点复杂,不急于在文首作出总体回应,而是对关键概念”社会化”下定义,为下文作铺垫.
2.反对原观点,总体上作出回应.
3.分析孩子的社会化程度是否会决定社会的命运,得出结论:孩子的社会化与社会的命运有关,但并不是影响社会命运的唯一因素.
4.分析我们是否有有效的方法去教育孩子,得出结论,当人们用自已过去的标准衡量并要求现在孩子时,就会造成他们不会很好地融入现代社会.
5自己的总结:孩子的社会化程度不是社会命运的唯一动力，家长不应用他们的陈腐理念去教育孩子。

lynnuanaUID: 2772328

8# carol.lj

红色：小词或补充  蓝色：句子  括号：点评 加粗：主题句子 下划线：标记  粉色：学习

What is the socialization?（问句总起，简单直接！） It refers to the process of learning one’s culture and how to live within it. In addition, for the individual, it provides the resources necessary for acting and participating within their society. Therefore（好像没有因果关系）, some important questions are in the wake of that: is（does？） the destiny of society result form the children’s（删） socialization ?Have we not yet learned how to rise children who are significant for bringing about a better society?If some（why use some？好像有些弱，不太肯定） people’s answers are yes, this assertion（两个问题指哪一个呢？） maybe a kind of overstatement while appealed in some aspects. Precisely（，p？） because there are on necessary relationship（不懂了~ on是no？那么are应该是is） among them（怎么看都是两个关系：society和child两者的关系或者两个问句的关系，among是三者以上） and poor evidence to bolster the assumption（and 后的这句话与前句不平衡，应该做成简单句而不是独立结构）.---（这段如果不出现一些错误，读起来还是很饱满的，要层次有层次，要句式有句式）
--直观理解：社会化解释和功能+夸大儿童社会化对社会作用+夸大学习培养儿童来better society

For one thing, consider the relationship between the socialization of children and the destiny of society. Indeed, the socialization of children is very important to their later lives, thus to some extent,（删~重复） so as the future of society. Of course, it seems that children are the backbone of the future world. （和so as the future of society感觉是一样的意思）However, that raise eyebrows me. Socialization is not the only, even not the most important character that play such a central role in the destiny of society. Numerous kinds of major members of socialization stand here, such as all individual members into it’s moral norms, attitudes, values , motives, language and symbols which is the means by which social and cultural continuity. （这句看了好几遍，不懂~~或许可以打散成小句，易于理解？）（少过渡词，then？）Turn our attention to the person who determine the destiny of society. John F Nash, half of whose life was fighting with schizophrenia, which almost deprive his right to have a formal life in the society,  has gain a tremendous achievement in the economic area, which calls game theory. （学习）Can't we assert Nash have no contribute to bring us a better society just because he is not totally socialization?（我觉得划线部分可以另起一段，写一下，AND最后的反问句没有下文了~~我读起来觉得nash也可能小时候的社会化蛮高的，因为你只谈到了他对社会的贡献，没有任何证据指出他小时候bad or not so well socialized）

For another thing, consider the growth of children, the social from all walks of life are very concerned about the children.（我觉得此句开头没有点出中心，不知道与topic有什么联系） For the time being, the quickening pace of life, social pressures, the birth rate reduced, many children which are no brothers or sisters an so forth, such social problems make a big influence on the growth of children. （这句有5个独立结构，之间应该用连接词连接一下否则语法错误）Their parents’growth environment than youth（语法错误） have changed a lot in some respects, such as education resources, access to information, living conditions, etc., Obviously, the childrenare better than their parents now（可以写成the environment the children now live in is better） . However, the parents demand children in the way they used to obey（不太顺，改下，我写的也不好，the parents still demand their children to do what they have done before）. Furthermore, the environment that（where） children has no playmates leads to be（the，lack可以作名词） lack of team cooperation ability（team work 或者cooperation）, cognitive ability of（towards） society and（as well as） leadership skills of the kids in the future. This is bad indeed for their growth.

In sum, children's socialization, to some degree, affects the destiny of society, but it doesn't determine it alone. And（删） fortunately we are raising children who can gradually ameliorate our society and bring about a bright and promising future. And it’s a wise choice to raise children by giving up the stale way（具体一点呼应一下？education methods）.

我觉得需要注意句子表达，读着不太顺。多看看多读读多分析下economist或者官方范文试试？

lynnuanaUID: 2772328

The future of society, as the author states, is hinged on whether children are well socialized or not, while he concludes pessimistically that the community has not yet learned the way to raise the of ...
lxin333 发表于 2010-4-20 00:43

我觉得你补充的好极了~~
加上这一点，文章会跟主题再紧一些·~manymanythanks~

xmaszztUID: 2796708

处女一休……挤的好辛苦=。=



What kind of society we are striving for – more technical, more sustainable, or more harmonious- determines what kind of education we take on children who determine the destiny of society, as the dual claims provides by the author, the better socialized education has a close relationship with the better society that I fundamentally agree. So, if we have not learn how to rise children brig about a better society, what skills the children grasps by the education at present, and if the education was socialized, whether we will have a better society.

Recognized that the education is not equal to the schools, which really is the main body of the current education system. The schools, teaching the knowledge, at the same time it imitate a environment which is related to society but not really the society, in this environment, children learn some social rules to regulate their behaviors, face their challenges and resolve them during the period of adolescence, and in this environment, children learn some basic social skills to deal with their friends, such as cooperation, compromise, acceptance and negotiation. So we can see that the purpose of the schools which gathering the children is to let our later generations adapt this society. Though the educators realize teaching is merge the knowledge and the society, the ‘under-socialized’ schools is not enough, as the competing pressure is stifling to model children, the standard of good or bed in school mostly focus on how is the knowledge mastered in some parts in the world for example.

Let us change our mind, what is the effect if we make the main body of education is the society itself? On one hand, the education should open to the society. Except necessary examines, schools should support all students more opportunities to learn how to live in society and tell from right values from wrong one, more constructive, schools can offer some chance to the childrensuch as part-time jobs, or volunteers in public sites, liking libraries, parks, and other sites will be a valuable experience to shorten the distance between schools and society. On the other hand, the whole society should shoulder the obligations of education. Schools, families, and other public places would all play the roles to raise the children to bring a better society. This sounds frothy but it worth to win over. Maybe the families, the schools, the environment children lived in will form a network of education and everyone has a positive guided attitudes when he face a child.

To all, I am not worried about that if the education was socialized, we can not get the better society. We have already socialized the education for a long time, and this proved to be correct. If it says we never get a better society only by socializing the education, but this way will always be good to the children, so and the society.

lxin333UID: 2650844

霸占该楼改作文

悦微微志燮UID: 2759026

    Children are the future of a nation. People from all circles of society are paying their attention on the growing up of children. And in my opinion, I tend to agree the speaker’s view that how children are socialized today determines the destiny of society.
    Although, compared with the old days, the living standard has a great change, the leadership and cooperate abilities of nowadays children are lower than the older generation. More and more children are growing up in the family which has only on child. The higher level of education source, living environment and available information could not replace the position of playmates that company with the children since the childhood. The lonely lives make children lack of the training of teamwork and communications. It’s not a good phenomenon to the children’s growing. Children may have problems to blend into the society when they have to meet the reality. For instance, many people have a perfect grade in their schools, but they still fail to get the achievement in their works. A good grade can be made by the hardworking of individual, but a great work needs people’s communication with others more. The socialization plays an important role in the development of society. How could the society become if there is no communication around people who live here?　The result is the decay of a society.
    Apart from these, how to educate children is also a study focus among the educator and the parents. Nowadays, most children go to learn the piano, dancing, painting and other art skills. Some parents also send their children to learn a second language, math, writing and so forth. Although these studies improve the civilization quality of the children, it also gives the children great pressures. Many students have depressive illness. The education system has exposed its advantages that it just pays attention on how many skills a student has, but not on the development of psychology and physical health. Building a better society needs the support of people who have wholesome inner quality but not children who only get nervous when meeting the problems.
    Undeniably, there are also many other factors impacting the destiny of society, but the level of socialization is the basic and essential one. We still have many confusion on how to educate children to be a fully developed individuals.
    Consequently, due to analysis and reasons above, we should really concern more of the socialization of children, which will have great influence on the development of our society.

xmaszztUID: 2796708

占…

isiruiUID: 2772448

Writing:

Actually, the children are the future of the society, which I totally agree, because they will play the main role in the future in every field when growing up. However, the claim that “How children are socialized today determines the destiny of society” overstated the importance of the socialization in one’s childhood. And maybe it’s either hard to make sure that whether the effective raising children socialized could lead to a better society.

As we know, if a child has opportunities to take general education sufficiently together with peers, live in the same environment, and even communicate with the society completely, he will be possible to become who supports the society. But if not, he is most likely to grow into an anti-social adult. However, socialization is a long process in one’s life. During his childhood the socialization displays learning the attitudes, values and actions appropriate to individuals as members of particular culture because of the differences of parents from whom the child first learns. Even the discrepancy of children’s socialization forming could be overlooked, then during teenager and adult, what they learn from the institution, entering a new profession and relocating a new environment always change a lot what they got before. So the socialization occurring in children couldn’t completely determine the destiny of society and we must consider the element the changes in teenager and adult.

In addition, according to above analysis, the socialization is only one factor influencing the extent to which an individual will ultimately contribute to a better society. Many factors such as experience, education, career, media, culture, religion and so on also influence it.

On the other hand, haven’t we yet learned how to raise children who can help bring about a better society? I think the answer is clear for us that we are creating a better society than before. The society today is more peaceful, full of equal human rights, and richer, which we have contributed. However, when we were children 20 years ago, did we receive some education or trainings about socialization? And even if we were socialized then, could the financial crisis in 1998 and 2007 which cause the society to be worse than before be avoided? What my opinion is that there is no direct relationship between that how to raise children socialized and bringing about a better society.

In conclusion, it is very important to raise children who are the future of the society and the influencing of the socialization in one’s childhood. But we must realize that the socialization is only one of the elements which bring about a better society and we should also pay attention to the method to socialize children.