AW习作修改铺

cynthiasmileUID: 2735173

this is the second issue i had.really appreciate it if u could spare ur precious time revising it.
thx in advance.



TOPIC: ISSUE120 - "So much is new and complex today that looking back for an understanding of the past provides little guidance for living in the present."

When asked about whether looking back from the history is still useful for the present living in the modern society, quite a few hold the same opinion as the speaker asserts, that so much is new and complex today that looking back has little use for living in the present. I have to concede that the ever developing society has brought us so many things that we can hardly imagine ,however, we still can`t overlook the values of history which are still helpful in solving certain social issues and showing guidance and motivation for individual developing.

Admittedly, the last fifty years have witnessed a great deal of changes and advance .Some say we are fortunate enough to live in an ever-developing world that provides us with the latest hi-tech devoted to improve our material life. While some of the other still believe it is a bit too sad that there comes with so many new and complex problems that we could hardly find a track from past. For instance, the use of genetic technologies on human beings ,as we call it cloning,  has already caused wide public concern, and understandably so.People are all aware that it would bring revolutionary change in biology and medicine technology , but still many people are against it because human cloning is the production of the lab and this breaks our traditional morality.  So how can we learn from history for this when in retrospect we find no such a technology ever existed in the past times? Similar doubts also concern with the development of nuclear energy, the booming information on Internet , high living pressure under the ever growing pace of urban life, which must be beyond the widest imagination of ancient people

Notwithstanding the foregoing concession, I fundamentally disagree with the speaker`s claim because in our attempts to address certain social issues, history still helps a lot .The problems coming with China's accession to the WTO is actually about the balance between international competition and cooperation which may happen in the earliest time when countries started to have trades between each other. Also the catastrophic resource exhaustion and pollution stemming from human beings` greed reflects the well-known theory of The Seven Deadly Sins and if all the people worldwide can realize that, begin to protect the environment and take up their responsibilities, the problem wouldn`t be as serious as in the moment. Not to mention throughout history ,we can see the wars from the ancient time to the latest Iraq War all led to  huge amount of lost in human lives and social capitals for both the victors and losers, thus may reminds the leaders think twice before they declare a war on another country. So in retrospect , we can find more similarities between the problems in reality and past which can give us many references to turn to for better decisions.

What`s more, just as the famous British philosopher Francis Bacon once said 'history makes men wise ‘which reminds us of the important teaching and guiding influence on individual by looking back to the history. Thomas Schelling, for instance, questioned the traditional and authoritative research method and created then further developed nonmathematical game theory. In 2005, Schelling was awarded the Nobel Prize in Economics for having enhanced the understanding of conflict and cooperation through game-theory analysis. His successful experience informs us we should dare to challenge the authority and resolute adherence to our own ideas or desires. By this way of learning ,the greatest minds in the world surely can teach us how to choose to a career we like and live a spiritually abundant life.

To sum up, from the analysis above, we can conclude despite the fact that the ever developing society has bought us new and complex problems which people in ancient time can hardly imagine, history, on the whole, has much to do with modern society, and by looking back to for an understanding of the past actually provides us great guidance for living in the present.

loujing001UID: 2477820

麻烦楼主了，非常感谢！抱歉我也还不能上传附件。

TOPIC: ARGUMENT188 - A new report suggests that men and women experience pain very differently from one another, and that doctors should consider these differences when prescribing pain medications. When researchers administered the same dosage of kappa opioids-a painkiller-to 28 men and 20 women who were having their wisdom teeth extracted, the women reported feeling much less pain than the men, and the easing of pain lasted considerably longer in women. This research suggests that kappa opioids should be prescribed for women whenever pain medication is required, whereas men should be given other kinds of pain medication. In addition, researchers should reevaluate the effects of all medications on men versus women.

The notion that doctors should consider differences between men and women when prescribing pain medications seems reasonable. After all, men and women have some inherent differences both physically and psychologically. However, there are some flaws in the research that can not be ignored, which may mask the real cause, and maybe the most significant cause of the different effect of kappa opiodis between men and women.

First of all, as mentioned in the argument, men and women experience pain very differently from one anther. So, it is an important factor which should be took into account the different pain sense of men and women when extracting wisdom teeth. Obviously, however, the arguer presumed men and women experienced same pain after their wisdom teeth extracted. If the researcher tested their pain sense before gave them kappa opiodis, the effect of the painkiller would be more clearly known, and this research would be more significant.

Second, the argument is weakened as some physical and psychological differences between men and women are not taking into account. For example, body weight is an important factor when counting the needed amount of pain medications. Since men are usually heavier than women, it is likely that men need more pain medications than women to ease their pain at the same level. Also, the placebo effect should be considered. It is at least possible that women may be more suggestible than men. When women are given painkillers in the research, they may already felt less pain even not took the painkiller yet.

Even if kappa opioids are finally proved to be more effective for women than for men, there is absolutely no evidence supported the conclusion that kappa opiodis should be prescribed only for women but not for men. Before suggest that kappa opiodis should be prescribed for women whenever pain medication is required, a more clear understanding of the benefit and harm provided by each kind of painkiller would be helpful.

Finally, there is no sufficient evidence support that a reevaluation of the effect of all medications on men verses women is necessary. After all, as human beings, the differences between men and women are in some finite aspects. As reevaluating all medications may be a costly project, it is better to select the medications whose effects may be affected by gender first.

The argument for pain medications based on the research result could provide important information. However, before conclusion about the kinds of pain medications should be prescribed for women and men is reached, a more complete understanding of the effects is needed. In addition, the second conclusion about the reevaluation of the effects of all medications on men versus women needs further discussion.

yi489286591UID: 2828446

抱歉楼主~~我找不到发Word 的地方。。
题目：ARGUMENT134 - The following was taken from a guide for aspiring writers.

"New writers usually cannot convince large, prestigious publishers that their work is marketable, so they must first publish with smaller, less well-known presses to establish a sales record. But the editors of Mystery Writers Magazine have good news for aspiring writers: the number of mystery novels published in the last two years has grown significantly, and more people read mysteries than any other type of novel. In addition, almost half of the mystery novels published last year were written by first-time novel writers. Since there is apparently an expanding market for mystery novels, all publishers will want to increase the number of mystery novels they publish. Therefore, new writers should write mystery novels to increase their chances for first-time publication with a larger, prestigious company."
字数：554          用时：00:37:12          日期：2010-7-7 16:08:18

The argument is well-presented, but not thoroughly well-reasoned. By making two reasons to explain that the new writers should write mystery for that there is a better future market, the argument for increasing the new writers chances for first-time publication with a larger, prestigious company seems logical.

However, the background that the author gives us seems not very reliable. Are the new writers usually not noticed by the large, prestigious publishers that their work is marketable? On the one hand, the large prestigious publishers can certain publish the new writers when they find the writers are potential in the future or their works are so excellent. Like the novel, gone with the wind, the masterpiece can always have no worries about finding a good publishers. On the other hand, new writers are numerous today and their books may not so good that the large publishers do not want to publisher their books. Admittedly, when a writer is famous enough to longing to publish his works by large publishers.The ineligible work is still the main reasons for the publishers not want to give the new writers chances to publish their works rather than their nameless.

In addition, the two reasons that the author gives us offer some points we need do more consideration. First, the evidence is not sufficient to show that if the grown of the mysteries novels published is proportional to the sales. Even if more people tend to read the mystery novels, are they buying them or just reading them in the library? There is no evidence shows us other possibility. Second, we do not make out that the relationship between the first-time novel writers and the new writers. Are the first-time novel writers who tend to write mystery novels are the writers who first step in the area of writing? Maybe not. There is still possible that the first- time novel writers is the people who have gained popularity in other kind of works. Like the Alice' , the major of the writer is mathematics rather than writing tales and he has published servals famous mathematical books. Can we say that Lewis Carroll is a new writer? Third, the survey are failing to consider other possibility to cause people liking to read the mystery novels. The fact may be that   one or serval famous writers people loved have change their writing style into the mysteries books rather than liking the books from the new writers or that it just is a fashion in a whim. Without ruling out those and other possibles, the author can not confidently make such a conclusion.

Finally, the author is failing to consider if new writers have the capability to write the mystery novels. If all new writers begin to write mysteries novels for their first step, it is a huge waste for the utilizing of people and material. Perhaps, most of the new writers are not very good at writing mysteries novel. And if a talent are good at writing fiction rather than mysteries novel, they could never noticed by the large, prestigious publishers and then hardly could be writing a famous books.

Notwithstanding at least the spirit of discovery and longing to the new writers success should be admired, but I really will not be that positive when it comes to whether the background is well-estimated, whether the point is well-developed and whether the argument is well-reasoned. After all, we are talking about the future of the new writers,how could be too self-carelessness and oversimplified?

yi489286591UID: 2828446

再发一篇~还是不会发Word。不好意思啊
题目：ARGUMENT50 - From a draft textbook manuscript submitted to a publisher.

"As Earth was being formed out of the collision of space rocks, the heat from those collisions and from the increasing gravitational energy of the planet made the entire planet molten, even the surface. Any water present would have evaporated and gone off into space. As the planet approached its current size, however, its gravitation became strong enough to hold gases and water vapour around it as an atmosphere. Because comets are largely ice made up of frozen water and gases, a comet striking Earth then would have vaporized. The resulting water vapour would have been retained in the atmosphere, eventually falling as rain on the cooled and solidified surface of Earth. Therefore, the water in Earth's oceans must have originated from comets."
字数：501          用时：00:52:34          日期：2010-7-7 12:24:18

The topic is well-presented, but thoroughly not well-reasoned. By making a brief instruction of the formation of the earth and the constitution of the comets, the argument for the water in Earth's oceans having originated from comets which must have clashed with the earth seems logical.

However, another area of investigation necessary before conclusion can be reached is identification that if the born of earth is relevant to the collision of the space rocks. Up until now, all the theories about who create the Earth and how it is born is just the imaginary and lack of the evidence and figures. The author seems to only assumed that Earth was being formed out of the collision of the space rocks. The action is just like I always imagery that I am a superman who can save the all human being. How ridiculous! Therefore, the author should give us more evidence and survey to identify his prerequisite.

In addition, if the Earth is the result of the the collision from space rocks, there is no study to show that it is the comets which the collision with the Earth. There are a myriad of planets in universal. How should we know that it is the comets not the asteroid or the other kinds of planet hit the Earth? Furthermore, assuming that the comets are the real planted which had clashed the Earth, the author is also failed to give us any possible evidences or figures to show that there are enough comets to clash the earth to form the expanses of the oceans.  As we all known that there are almost 70% water occupied in our Earth--a large proportion of our land. Could comets have such a large of water so serve and still prevent our land full of water? And if there are no other origination of water, the Earth would be less and less by experiencing such a long time--perhaps millions years--without the collision from the comets. Besides, the author cannot deny that the frozen water in the comets had been vaporized when the comets tended to hit the Earth by their high speed and the heat from friction.
Finally, the author is failing to consider other possible alternatives to the reasons that where the Earth's oceans are came from. Such alternatives may include the possibility that there may be the influence of the earthquake or the volcanos, or that there is water original from the Earth's core and oozed from the Earth at a slowly rate, by water cycle, forming into our Earth. Without ruling out those and other possibles, the survey cannot confidently make a conclusion.

Notwithstanding the spirit of the discovery and longing to know should be admired, I really will not be that positive when it comes to whether the theory is well-reasoned, whether the point is well-built and whether the argument is sophisticated. After all, it is the study about the formation of our Earth and Earth's ocean, how could be too self-careless and oversimplified?

yaniiUID: 2807225

麻烦lz给修改一下吧:)

江雪UID: 2790520

破海童鞋要考试了，请楼上各位童鞋耐心等待一下，或者考虑“零散版友作文修改帖”。

此楼暂时不要发作文了。

江雪UID: 2790520

我说过了 破海同学要考试了，请要找人改作文的同学加入零散互改帖 或是单独发帖等拍。

Max_SugarUID: 2850551

23# 江雪
sorry，不好意思。第一次来。马上撤了。