issue207 欢迎拍文互改小组

yaniiUID: 2807225

TOPIC: ISSUE207 - "Rituals and ceremonies help define a culture. Without them, societies or groups of people have a diminished sense of who they are."

The speaker’s statement is actually twofold: First, it is rituals and ceremonies that help define a culture. Second, they also help people identify who they are, enhancing their sense of belonging. I agree to each one to some extent.

Admittedly, rituals and ceremonies reveal a certain aspect of culture, and by observing them we evoke the sense of belonging. For example, in Thanksgiving Day in America, there are usually thanks parades matching in main streets and typical Americans bake pumpkin pies and cook turkeys for celebration at home. In the dinner, they give thanks to those they appreciate most. Consider wayfaring compatriots in strange land, if see the matches in TV, and eat pies and turkeys, what is the emotion washing over their body? Definitely the feel like at home. Those rituals and ceremonies serve to identify themselves with their culture enhance their sense of belonging to their motherland. Another illustration is the wedding ceremony, performed in ways far diverse in different civilization. Couples in transculture marriage tend to dissent from each other at the way of wedding rituals. The sense of belonging draws them apart in thought as the different ceremonies

Nonetheless, culture embraces much more than mere rituals and ceremonies, which are the appearances of culture. Put in perspective, a clear and universal definition of culture is hard to obtain. Generally speaking, culture involves religion, arts, history of a group, the accordant standards of worth or deviated value, the way people addressing problems, the different individual role related to gender, age, status, profession and relatives, so on and so forth. The culture, with all its connation, can arouse deep emotion in the individual, simultaneously revealing one’s identification. Hence we find our sense of belonging by the voice from the bottom of our heart when resonate with our culture.

With the quickening tempo of modern life, some rituals and ceremonies tend to be simplified, while the essence of culture remains unchanged. Consider, for example, the celebration of Christmas, though still one of the most important festivals in western world, is not as grand as before, except the overspreading promotion. On the other hand, the blending and interaction with diverse other cultures has changed the culture connation of some rituals and ceremonies gradually and inconspicuously, which may not have change much in contrary.

In conclusion, rituals and ceremonies only reflect one aspect of culture, which have profound connation. And it's by understanding the whole cultural background behind that they enhance our sense of belonging.

fchenyanUID: 2804020

The speaker’s statement is actually twofold: First, it is rituals and ceremonies that help define a culture. Second, they also help people identify who they are, enhancing their sense of belonging. I agree to each one to some extent.（这个开头很新颖）

Admittedly, rituals and ceremonies reveal a certain aspect of culture, and by observing them we evoke the sense of belonging. For example, in Thanksgiving Day in America, there are usually thanks parades matching in main streets and typical Americans bake pumpkin pies and cook turkeys for celebration at home. In the dinner, they give thanks to those they appreciate most. Consider wayfaring compatriots in strange land, if see the matches in TV, and eat pies and turkeys, what is the emotion washing over their body? Definitely the feel like at home. Those rituals and ceremonies serve to identify themselves with their culture enhance their sense of belonging to their motherland. Another illustration is the wedding ceremony, performed in ways far diverse in different civilization. Couples in transculture marriage tend to dissent from each other at the way of wedding rituals. The sense of belonging draws them apart in thought as the different ceremonies

Nonetheless, culture embraces much more than mere rituals and ceremonies, which are the appearances （知道你想用“外在”这个意思，但是换个词可以表达的更好）of culture. Put in perspective, a clear and universal definition of culture is hard to obtain. Generally speaking, culture involves religion, arts, history of a group, the accordant standards of worth or deviated value, the way people addressing problems, the different individual role related to gender, age, status, profession and relatives, so on and so forth. The culture, with all its connation, can arouse deep emotion in the individual, simultaneously revealing（preserving or manifesting?） one’s identification. Hence we find our sense of belonging by the voice from the bottom of our heart when resonate with our culture.

With the quickening tempo of modern life, some rituals and ceremonies tend to be simplified, while the essence of culture remains unchanged. Consider, for example, the celebration of Christmas, though still one of the most important festivals in western world, is not as grand as before, except the overspreading promotion. On the other hand, the blending and interaction with diverse other cultures has changed the culture connation of some rituals and ceremonies gradually and inconspicuously, which may not have change much in contrary.（这一段对你的观点有什么作用）

In conclusion, rituals and ceremonies only reflect one aspect of culture, which have profound connation（这个用法很好，大赞！）. And it's by understanding the whole cultural background behind that they enhance our sense of belonging.（希望你在构思上有所改进）

yaniiUID: 2807225

谢谢！我会进一步改进的:)