23号就要考了..argument29求拍求指点~ 谢谢大家！

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23号就要考了..argument29求拍求指点~ 谢谢大家！快要考试了，模考次数还不是很多，也不知道自己水平如何。。 希望看到的好心人们能指点一二，点评内容或者指出我的水平在什么程度都可以，小女子谢谢大家了！


TOPIC: ARGUMENT29 - When Ida McAllister ran for mayor of Lake City four years ago, she failed to win even 30 percent of the vote. But since then, McAllister has made public her commitment to environmental causes. She would be wise, therefore, to announce her intention to close all Lake City parks to automobile traffic, thus following the example of the former mayor of Plainsville, Alecia Yu . On the recommendation of a small group of concerned citizens, Mayor Yu prohibited automobile traffic in all Plainsville parks, and therefore was credited with solving the pollution problem and improving the quality of life in Plainsville. This action would have great appeal to the citizens of Lake City, most of whom participate in the community's recycling program, and would guarantee McAllister's success in her current quest to be Lake City's new mayor.
WORDS: 406
TIME: 00:30:00
DATE: 2010/8/17 6:44:43

Merely based on the unfounded assumption and dubious evidence, the author draw the conclusion that to guarantee her success in the current quest to be Lack City's new mayor, McAllister should announce her intention to close all Lake City parks to automobile traffic following the former mayor of Plainsville. At first glance, the argument seems logical, but further reflection reveal that it omits some substantial concerns that should be asserted in order to lend strong support for the recommendation.
A threshold problem is that the arguer fails to prove that the reason of the pollution problem been solved in Plainsville might not be that the former mayor Yu prohibited automobile traffic in all the parks there. There can be a myriad of other factors that help to make the improvement. For instance, the Plainsville residents might pour more concern upon the environment, so that they act carefully to be eco-friendly. Another possible reason is that there may be a lot of people move out of Plainsville, and the decreased population leads to the improvement in environment. Without ruling out these possibilities, the argument cannot be persuasive as it stands.
Even assuming that the close of automobile traffic in Plainsville parks can be beneficial for its environment, the recommendation might not be fit for Lake City. The two cities might not be surely comparable with difference in population, t climate, geographic condition and many other aspects. This restriction might be harmful if the Lake City residents have to use automobile to go through parks for geographic reasons. In addition, the arguer fail to consider other measures that can help solving the pollution problem and improving the quality of life in Lake City.
Another problem is that just as the author cites, there are only a small group of citizens make the recommendation, thus this action would possibly be not so appealing to the citizens of Plainsville and no evidence shows that the Lake City residents would. Consequently, this action might not lend great support to McAllistre's mayor election.
In conclusion, the argument rests on a series of unsubstantiated assumptions, which renders it unconvincing as it stands. To bolster it, the author must provide clear information that the recommendation mentioned above would certainly cause improvement in solving the pollution problems. Moreover, I would suspend my judgment about the credibility of this argument until the author can provide more evidence that this and only this action can be effective to solve environmental problems in Lake City.