issue111"The worldwide distribution of television programs and adverti

雨&彩虹UID: 132532

111"The worldwide distribution of television programs and advertisements is seriously diminishing the differences among cultures.

Today, the development of media industry is experiencing an incomparable spout time in history during which television programs and advertisements are spreading even to the remotest area. As a result, some people show concerns because they wonder whether this trend will finally cause diminishing of culture diversity. Although this concern does make sense in some aspects, we should examine the propelling power behind this phenomenon to find out the true effect of it.
  
Television programs as well as the advertisements reveal to people a utterly different world to where they were brought up and thus make it possible for the audience to stay home to enjoy the beautiful scenery of places of interest, grotesque customs of a different nation, well-preserved cultural heritage of another country which all help people to realize more about the difference instead of staying ignorant about the outside world. Some successful television program and advertisements aim at the global audience as a whole as their target group and this effort to reach the largest majority as a whole can be reflected in their creative design of programs and advertisements and their distributing endeavor. For example, “discovery” has arrest many audience’s eyeball because of its widely- covered topic such as astronomy, biology, history and anthropology, artistically shoot pictures and sensational commentary. Is this program diminish or increasing our awareness of the difference among cultures? Will the viewing of Roman’s glorious history, America’s persevere exploring of outer space, the miserable and fierce world war one and world war two arouse the consideration that all cultures is the same? Advertisement, at the same time, if distribute globally, usually requires that they cater for the taste of the local audience. We could see this if we look at Kenturkey’s advertising creative strategy and find out how much it has changed from one country to another.


Television itself is a neutral power, and it cannot contribute to the diminishing of culture diversity alone. Although human beings are susceptible to the influence of mass media such as television program and advertisements, we could not blame them as the sole the causes of this phenomenon.
The broadcasting company should be responsible to choose programs that will truly embody the cultural differences as well as the common human similarity such as the longing for love, passion, humanity and the like. And the audience, when viewing programs and advertisements from the other country, should bear in mind that as human beings, we share certain similarity as well as diversity and this is the true impetus to push the world forward as well the power to make our world a more colorful place to live in.

Although to be too fussy about the negative influence of television is unnecessary, it does not mean that we pay no attention to it at all. We should be aware of the possibility of the domination of one culture, such as the western culture that we call as cultural imperialism. If we exaggerate it a little bit more, the prospect will be probably that the world be decorated in one color and expressed in one voice. I believe that even this imagination will sound uncomfortable to most people, whether they will be members of an assimilating or assimilated group.

paisleyUID: 64183

The worldwide distribution of television programs and advertisements is seriously diminishing the differences among cultures.

Today, the development of media industry is experiencing an incomparable spout time in history during which television programs and advertisements are spreading even to the remotest area. As a result, some people show concerns because they wonder whether this trend will finally cause diminishing of culture diversity. Although this concern does make sense in some aspects, we should examine the propelling power behind this phenomenon to find out the true effect of it. 开头比较平淡。感觉只是重复了一下题目，然后说你不同意这个看法。如果换个新颖点的会更好。

Television programs as well as the advertisements reveal to people a (应是an)utterly different world to where they were brought up and thus make it possible for the audience to stay home to enjoy the beautiful scenery of places of interest, grotesque customs of a different nation, well-preserved cultural heritage of another country which all help people to realize more about the difference instead of staying ignorant about the outside world. Some successful television program and advertisements aim at the global audience as a whole as their target group and this effort to reach the largest majority as a whole can be reflected in their creative design of programs and advertisements and their distributing endeavor. For example, “discovery”（d最好大写，表示是一个电视节目） has arrest many audience’s eyeball because of its widely- covered topic such as astronomy, biology, history and anthropology, artistically shoot pictures and sensational commentary. Is this program diminish or increasing our awareness of the difference among cultures? Will the viewing of Roman’s glorious history, America’s persevere exploring of outer space, the miserable and fierce world war one and world war two arouse the consideration that all cultures is the same? Advertisement, at the same time, if distribute（应用被动形式） globally, usually requires that they cater for the taste of the local audience. We could see this if we look at Kenturkey’s （我想还是写KFC好，KENTURKEY只是一个姓，不像在中国每个人一听到“肯德基”就知道说的是快餐点。）advertising creative strategy（creative advertising strategy 比较好） and find out how much it has changed from one country to another.

这段论证很不错。但是其中包含了两层意思，一是电视节目和广告使人们了解各种不同的文化。 二是电视节目和广告往往都是本土化的。这两个意思完全可以分成两段来写，这样可以写的更深入。

Television itself is a neutral power, and it （alone应该放在这里）cannot contribute to the diminishing of culture diversity alone. Although human beings are susceptible to the influence of mass media such as television program and advertisements, we could not blame them as the sole the （the应去掉）causes of this phenomenon.

The broadcasting company should be responsible to choose programs that will truly embody the cultural differences as well as the common human similarity such as the longing for love, passion, humanity and the like. And the audience, when viewing programs and advertisements from the other country, should bear in mind that as human beings, we share certain similarity as well as diversity and this is the true impetus to push the world forward as well the power to make our world a more colorful place to live in. （个人感觉这段和中心脱离了。题目讨论是实证的，“事实“如何的问题，而这段变成讨论规范的了，人们”应该“如何。如果每个题目都这样写，那就很混乱了，变成没有论点了。一般只宜在结尾处稍微提两句，放在论证当中感觉不太合适）

Although to be too fussy about the negative influence of television is unnecessary, it does not mean that we pay no attention to it at all. We should be aware of the possibility of the domination of one culture, such as the western culture that we call as（as 可去掉） cultural imperialism. If we exaggerate it a little bit more, the prospect will be （be 应放在probably后面）probably that the world be decorated in one color and expressed in one voice. I believe that even this imagination will sound uncomfortable to most people, whether they will be members of an assimilating or assimilated group.


写得不错！
语言很好了，几乎没问题。论述上也有新颖的见解，展开收拢都自如。写得很紧凑，convincing。

如果在各段之间有表示互相关系的词句会更好，不过要避免first second这样的词哦。

多谢你今天帮人修改作文，我就是看到你的修改，才来看你的文章的。（虽然我的眼睛已经很累了）。希望你也能继续多多修改其他朋友的文章。哪怕只提点结构上和想法上的建议也是好的。因为你不可能每个题目都练过来啊，看别人的题目，自己脑子过一遍,既可以给别人提建议，自己又多了一次训练的机会.为别人服务的人优先得到斑竹的修改哦！

雨&彩虹UID: 132532

谢谢, 我也是这几天刚刚着手写东西,所以出的问题比较多的.

你说的有些偏离主题的部分我是这样想的.

从社会学的角度来说, 主流文化对于非主流文化的同化在一定程度上是不可避免的.

那么生活在这两中文化中的人,尽管应该保存对自己文化的认同感,同时应该意识到人类所共有的

共同点. 但是可能我的衔接没有做好.

这段时间我会经常过来看看, 帮着其他人也改点东西, 看你每天好辛苦的:)

paisleyUID: 64183

十分感谢！涕零ing。。。。

ken0405UID: 124994

paisley
辛苦ing

apple670UID: 133187

写的好好，改的也好好哦
羡慕ING