鸟儿的 Daily Writing, since Jan.27th

鸟儿UID: 3238411

14# lovely_hippo123


1. 我支持你的to some extent. 谷歌学术里面一搜多是 to 少见in.
http://scholar.google.com.hk/scholar?hl=zh-CN&q=in+some+extent&btnG=%E6%90%9C%E7%B4%A2&lr=&as_ylo=&as_vis=1

2. 我拼错了 应该是more thorough 更深刻全面，不是through
   more thorough 应该也可以吧，又是谷歌学术
http://scholar.google.com.hk/scholar?hl=zh-CN&q=more+thorough&btnG=%E6%90%9C%E7%B4%A2&lr=&as_ylo=&as_vis=1

这句话之所以错 应该是The university study, （which is 删去）more specific and through, provides the students a sound step for further advancement.
逗号之间是插入语。如果用which is 的定语从句就不用逗号了。我试了两种改法word里都对了。
这一点 西雅图 也看一下哦~

谢谢西雅图的批改，这些建议都很好，我受益多多呀。

鸟儿UID: 3238411

1.30
综合写作 TPO14

The reading passage illustrates several benefits the salvage logging, a practice to deal with aftermath of forest fire, brings about in regarding to environment and economy. However, this statement receives severe attack from the lecturer by maintaining that salvage logging does more harm than good in consideration of environmental protection and economic benefits.

Firstly, the speaker argues that it is unnecessary to clean up the dead trees, trees that can be regarded as wealthy resources to increase the soil quality, thus provide better growing conditions for further generations. Nevertheless, the reading passage merely claims that the remains of the dead trees do nothing but take up spaces for fresh growth, prevent the vegetation recovery from disaster as well.

Secondly, the professor also casts doubts on the insects problem. Admittedly, the number of insects surges due to the rotting wood left by the fire. But it is unreasonable to draw the conclusion that decaying wood causes damage to the living creatures on the mere fact of increasing insects, as presented in the passage. Actually, for hundreds of years, decaying wood provides suitable habitat not only for harmful insects but also for birds and many other beneficial insects, which is contributable to the whole biological progress in the long run.

Thirdly, the economic benefits, as the speaker points out, are small and not long-lasting. Though much wood provided, it is really costly to collect by helicopter and other hi-tech vehicles. Though many jobs created by salvage logging, it is experienced and educated outsiders rather than local residents that take up. This point of view no doubt challenges the contents in the reading passage.

鸟儿UID: 3238411

1月31日
独立100924NA
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? College or University should offer students more preparation before they start working.

Nowadays a hot discuss has been brought into public focus that whether the college or university should provide the students preparation before setting out to work. My point of view, involving deep analysis, goes to total support of such career preparation. The reasons will be presented bellow.

First of all, the ultimate goal to send a student to the university is nothing but cultivate him/her a wholesome mind who can make a difference in the world, no matter big or small. Of course, studying is no doubt of priority in school. However, studying is, not an end, but a means to achieve this very goal.  In this point, it is hard to convince people that a studying robot who is incapable of working can contribute a lot to the society. If studying is a form of input of knowledge, then working the output. Therefore, the aim of education calls for students to develop working skills.

Besides, with some specific training on working preparation, one can transforms his role from a student to an employee more fast and comfortable. Taken my college as an example, the course named Career Planning is compulsive to all the freshmen, which means each student has to have a clear mind of what job to take in the future, thus make the best use of every single day in the following four years in university. As for me, I want to be a HR serving in a big multinational company, so I seize every chance of such internship and talk with Mr.Big in this area as much as possible. I believe such preparation will be beneficial to me in searching an ideal job after graduation.

Having a satisfied job is the students’ major concern. While for the companies, they always give the final offers to the most competitive applicants. Just as the old saying goes, opportunities favor the ones who are fully prepared. Compared with a green hand, the staff with a prepared mind reduces the company's time and money spent on the training process, which in turn becomes the overall profit of the company. Why not choose these talents meanwhile increase its own economic effectiveness? The answer is obviously yes!

In summary, taken the advantages talked above, it is wiser for universities to get students fully prepared before start working. It follows the education instruction to cultivate contributable talents for the society, benefits the students to better adapt to role transform and keep competitive in the future career development, as well as help the companies realize economical goal to make all the best.

鸟儿UID: 3238411

有一个问题就是我写作文速度相当乌龟啊，半小时才写300字。后来又写改了半小时才凑合400多。想法倒是有，就是每一段三句话就结束了，不懂得怎样展开。只好正过来反过去的扯。

我承认我打字速度还不够呃。

还希望大家教教我怎么写充实。直白点，怎么码字？

alexfanfanUID: 3133140

不好意思 我改晚了。。。
1/27的

Sudden2012UID: 2856328

鸟儿，不好意思哈，改得有点晚。
作文速度慢开始写都会有的，多多练习是必须的。想要写的充实点又快，我的方法是在写body的时候心中默念一条线索：我认为……因为我觉得……比如说……你看……，这样思路出得会比较快，如果你担心雷同的话，可以多收集一些关于连接词的表达方式，这样写作的速度和质量会有提升，加油哈！

鸟儿UID: 3238411

鸟儿，不好意思哈，改得有点晚。
作文速度慢开始写都会有的，多多练习是必须的。想要写的充实点又快，我的方法是在写body的时候心中默念一条线索：我认为……因为我觉得……比如说……你看……，这样思路出得会比较 ...
Sudden2012 发表于 2012-1-31 23:27

谢谢你，蜗牛~~~
真是好建议啊，怪不得你写的都那么流畅。论证也严谨。我要赶紧琢磨一个适合自己的思维套路，多多验证几遍呢，就剩10天啦啊啊好紧张。

banes triggered by ……far overweight boons   
你改的多美的句子，太喜欢了！谢谢你！

坏绿的眼睛UID: 3138294

其实你的水平比我好很多 = = 提供一些个人看法 共同进步咯  
我也是怎么写字数都很少  惆怅   还需要练习哇

鸟儿UID: 3238411

谢谢坏绿批改。



今天TPO做了一套，错超多。不写作文了，研究范文捯饬套路去~~~大家加油！