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美蓝
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发表于 2012-3-9 17:10:52 |显示全部楼层

3.9机经

3.9机经-美蓝.doc

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wangqianrius
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新手上路

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发表于 2012-3-9 19:02:47 |显示全部楼层

3.7 110415comparing to hiring famousteachers, school should pay more attention to improve facilities.

To attract more intelligent students, manyschools focus their main attention(个人感觉略有点中式英语) on the improvement of various facilities. An online survey,conducted by China's biggest website Sina.com, shows that 83 percents of the500 schools involved concede that their financial budgets for advancing theirfacilities are much higher, in fact, almost two times higher than those on itsrecruitment of famous teachers. Nevertheless, after a serious pondering, I holdthat, for a school, its famous teaching crew is of greater significance thanits facilities. The reasons are as follows.

First, a school devoid of notable teachersis hard to attract students. It is no exaggeration to say that teachers are thepillar of a school, since teachers bear the responsibility to (of?) cultivate the young, or(and?) the future of our entire country. Parents send their children toschool to receive better education, not to enjoy the advanced facilities there.And a good education can only be imparted by these famous teachers. Thereforeif a school cares more about its facilities, it will finally lose thepreponderance over its competitors (学习了~) and fail to attract outstanding students.

Furthermore, a school usually earns its（个人感觉这里的its可以删掉？）prestige in education by its famous teachers. My high school used to be thebest school in our city. However, the president of our high school thought thatour school should alsostand at the leadingplace（改成be in the leading position会不会比较好？） in facilities. So in the following years, more than a（去掉a） half of the financial budget was spend on purchasing more computersand other facilities. Its main competitor, on the other hand, brought in manyfamous teachers with the lure of higher pay. In just a few years' time, itquickly surpassed my high school and became the best school of our city.

Moreover, without excellent students andhigh prestige, it is rather difficult for a school to acquire any patronage. Aschool usually acquires financial support from students' tuition and patronage.Fewer students and little patronage will lead the school deficient of money（个人感觉怪怪的……）. In the long run, this will harm（改成hinder或jeopardize会不会好一点？） its sustaining development.

In a word, too much attention on improvinga school's facilities will only mislead the school and result in losing its prestige as well as students resources（个人感觉这部分缺主语… 可不可以改成result in its loseof prestige and student resource？）. So it is with no doubt that a schoolshould always properly use its financial budget to hire more famous teachers.

看得出来楼主的词汇和句式都有不少积累啊，赞一个~
不过个人觉得第一段的转折有点突兀，写了挺长一段许多学校都重视设施提高的例子，会不会让阅卷的人觉得观点混乱呢？

话说我还是不能发附件 55...

木有想法而且打字好慢>_<

双非DIY美硕申请总结

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